Wisdom Of The Rooms - 2020

[bluidkiti]

April 13

Quote of the Week

"Without tolerance for another, it’s hard to have empathy for myself."

“Tolerant” was one of the last words you would have used to describe me before I entered the program. Instead, I was quick to find fault with what you said or how you dressed, or what you did. My opinion of myself was so low that I constantly had to rip you down to build myself up. Living this way made me bitter, isolated, and resentful.

As I listed my resentments in the Fourth Step, I began to see how much fear and low self-esteem drove my decisions and actions, hurting both myself and others. As I worked with my sponsor, I developed an awareness and acceptance for myself. And as I listened to others sharing honestly and openly about similar struggles and fears, I began to feel a connection with them. For the first time, I experienced true empathy for others.

I once read a description of empathy as being an emotional echo that is sent out to the center of another person and returns with pieces of yourself. When I began finding pieces of myself in other people’s stories, I began to find the shared humanity in our experiences. And that is when I developed real tolerance and compassion for others, as well as for myself. Today, I understand that without tolerance for another, it’s hard to have empathy for myself.