Links

Join

Forums

Find Help

Recovery Readings

Spiritual Meditations

Chat

Contact


Go Back   Bluidkiti's Alcohol and Drug Addictions Recovery Help/Support Forums > Lounge > Humor
Register FAQ Community Calendar Arcade Today's Posts Search Chat Room

Share This Forum!  
 
        

Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please.

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 06-12-2017, 02:15 PM   #1
MajestyJo
Super Moderator
 
MajestyJo's Avatar
 

Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Hamilton, ON
Posts: 25,078
Default On The Front Porch

On the first day, God created the dog and said, “sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this I will give you a life span of twenty years.”


The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"

And God said that it was good.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh..


For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."


The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform.


How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"


And God again said that it was good


On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer


all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family.


For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years.


How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"


And God agreed it was good.


On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life.


For this, I'll give you twenty years."


But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back,


the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"


"Okay," said God, "You asked for it"


So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves.


For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family.


For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.


And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.


Life has now been explained to you.


There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.


I'm doing it as a public service.


If you are looking for me, I will be on the front porch.
__________________

Love always,

Jo

I share because I care.


MajestyJo is offline   Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to MajestyJo For Sharing:
Sponsored Links
Post New ThreadReply  

Bookmarks


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Don’t give holy things to dogs, and don’t throw your pearls in front of pigs bluidkiti Daily Spiritual Meditations 0 12-23-2016 08:37 AM
Don’t give holy things to dogs, and don’t throw your pearls in front of pigs bluidkiti Daily Spiritual Meditations 0 09-24-2016 09:46 AM


Click here to make a Donation

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:28 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.