The 12 Promises (Long-Form)

[MajestyJo]

The Promises

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity
and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.

That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will
intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.

We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us -- sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.

Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past life. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as
you trudge the road of Happy Destiny. May God bless you and keep you.
Big Book, pp. 83-84

[MajestyJo]

How many promises await us as we trudge this road of happy destiny? Some folks think they are limited to those following Step 9 on page 83. There are 20 there (not the 12 often mentioned). But, you will find promises for each step and in many other places as well. We are sure you want to know what they are.

Thanks to Buddy T. at About.com we were referred to the Big Book Comes Alive website, which lists their version of 147 Big Book promises. We have not yet added from their list to ours the missing promises that meet our promise criteria. You may wish to make a very worthwhile visit to them at:

http://www.msag.org/BBCA/The%20147%20Promises.htm

However, there is a price to pay for reading on. You must contact us with additional promises from inside the front cover through page 164. Here are well over 100 presented as of today:

Big Book page #25

[PROMISES OF STEP TWO]

1) There is a solution. Almost none of us likes the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet.
2) We have found much of heaven and
3) we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of existence of which we had not even dreamed.
4) The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe.
5) The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous.
6) He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.

Big Book page #27:

7) Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics have had what are called vital spiritual experiences. To me these occurrences are phenomena. They appear to be in the nature of huge emotional displacements and rearrangements.
8) Ideas, emotions, and attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side,
9) and a completely new set of conceptions and motives begin to dominate them.

Big Book page #28:

10) We, in our turn, sought the same escape with all the desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful hand of God.
11) A new life has been given us or, if you prefer, "a design for living" that really works.

Big Book page #46:

Much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another's conception of God.
12) Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach
13) and to effect a contact with Him.
14) As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps.
15) We found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek Him.
16) To us, the Realm of Spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek.
17) It is open, we believe, to all men.

Big Book page #47:

18) Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him.
19) Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach.

20) That was growth, but if we wished to grow we had to begin somewhere. So we used our own conception, however limited it was. We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. "Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?" As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is willing to believe, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way.
21) It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built.

Big Book page #48:
22) Faced with alcoholic destruction, we soon became as open minded on spiritual matters as we had tried to be on other questions. In this respect alcohol was a great persuader.
23) It finally beat us into a state of reasonableness. Sometimes this was a tedious process; we hope no one else will be prejudiced for as long as some of us were.

Big Book page #50:
24) Here are thousands of men and women, worldly indeed. They flatly declare that since they have come to believe in a Power greater than themselves, to take a certain attitude toward the Power, and to do certain simple things, there has been a revolutionary change in their way of living and thinking.
25) In the face of collapse and despair, in the face of the total failure of their human resources, they found that a new power, peace, happiness, and sense of direction flowed into them.
26) This happened soon after they whole-heartedly met a few simple requirements. Once confused and baffled by the seeming futility of existence, they show the underlying reasons why they were making heavy going of life. Leaving aside the drink question, they tell why living was so unsatisfactory. They show how the change came over them. When many hundreds of people are able to say that the consciousness of the Presence of God is today the most important fact of their lives, they present a powerful reason why one should have faith.

Big Book page #55:

27) We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. It was so with us.

Big Book page #57:

28) Even so has God restored us all to our right minds. To this man, the revelation was sudden. Some of us grow into it more slowly.
29) But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him.
30) When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us! [contributed by Joe Mc.]

Big Book page #63. [contributed by Kay G. and Jon T.]

[PROMISES OF STEP THREE]
31) When we sincerely took such a position, all sort of remarkable things followed.
32) We had a new Employer.
33) He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well.
34) Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs.
35) More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life.
36) As we felt new power flow in,
37) as we enjoyed peace of mind,
38) as we discovered we could face life successfully,
39) as we became conscious of His presence,
40) we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.
41) We were reborn.
42) an effect, sometimes a very great one, was felt at once.

Big Book page #68. [ contributed by Kay G.]

43) At once, we commence to outgrow fear.

Big Book page #70. [ contributed by Tom T. of Omaha.]

43a) We have begun to learn tolerance, patience and good will toward all men, even our enemies, for we look on the them as sick people.

Big Book page #75:

[PROMISES OF STEP FIVE]
Once we have taken this step, withholding nothing,
44) we are delighted.
45) We can look the world in the eye.
46) We can be alone at perfect peace and ease.
47) Our fears fall from us.
48) We begin to feel the nearness of our Creator.
49) We may have had certain spiritual beliefs, but now we begin to have a spiritual experience.
50) The feeling that the drink problem has disappeared will often come strongly.
51) We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.

[MajestyJo]

Big Book page #78:

[PROMISES OF STEP EIGHT]
52) If our manner is calm, frank, and open, we will be gratified with the result.
53) In nine cases out of ten the unexpected happens. Sometimes the man we are calling upon admits his own faults,
54) so feuds of years' standing melt away in an hour.
55) Rarely do we fail to make satisfactory progress. Our
56) former enemies sometimes praise what we are doing and wish us well.
57) Occasionally, they will offer assistance.

Big Book page #83:
[ PROMISES OF STEP NINE]
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development,
58) we will be amazed before we are half way through.
59) We are going to know a new freedom
60) and a new happiness.
61) We will not regret the past
62) nor wish to shut the door on it.
63) We will comprehend the word serenity and
64) we will know peace.
65) No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
66) That feeling of uselessness (will disappear)
67) and self-pity will disappear.
68) We will lose interest in selfish things and
69) (We will) gain interest in our fellows.
70) Self-seeking will slip away.
71) Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
72) Fear of people (will leave us) and
73) (fear) of economic insecurity will leave us.
74) We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
75) We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
76) Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among ussometimes quickly, sometimes slowly.
77) They will always materialize if we work for them.

Big Book page #84 :

[PROMISES OF STEP TEN]
64) And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone even alcohol.

65) For by this time sanity will have returned.

66) We will seldom be interested in liquor.

67) If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame.

68) We react sanely and normally, and

69) we will find that this has happened automatically.

70 We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it.

71) We are not fighting it,

72) neither are we avoiding temptation.

73) We feel as though we had been places in a position of neutralitysafe and protected.

74) We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us.

75) We are neither cocky nor are we afraid.

76) That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

Big Book page #86:

[PROMISES OF STEP ELEVEN]

On awakening let us think about the twenty-four hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions
77) we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use.
78) Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.
79) In thinking about our day we may face indecision. We may not be able to determine which course to take. Here we ask God for inspiration, an intuitive thought or a decision. We relax and take it easy. We don't struggle. We are often surprised how the right answers come after we have tried this for a while.

Big Book page #87 :

80) What used to be the hunch or the occasional inspiration gradually becomes a working part of the mind.

81) Being still inexperienced and having just made conscious contact with God, it is not probable that we are going to be inspired at all times. We might pay for this presumption in all sorts of absurd actions and ideas. Nevertheless, we find that our thinking will, as time passes, be more and more on the plane of inspiration.
82) We come to rely upon it.
83) We are careful never to pray for our own selfish ends. Many of us have wasted a lot of time doing that and it doesn't work. You can easily see why.

As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day "Thy will be done."
84) We are then in much less danger of excitement,
85) fear,
86) anger,
87) worry,
88) self-pity,
89) or foolish decisions.
90) We become much more efficient.
91 We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves.
92) It worksit really does.

Big Book page #97 :

93) PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail.
94) You can help when no one else can.
95) You can secure their confidence when others fail.
96) Life will take on new meaning.
97) To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friendsthis is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.

Big Book page #100 :

[PROMISES OF STEP TWELVE]

98) Both you and the new man must walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. [contributed by Kate O.]
99) When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God's hands were better than anything we could have planned. [contributed by Kate O.]
100) Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances! [contributed by Beth]
101) Assuming we are spiritually fit, we can do all sorts of things alcoholics are not supposed to do. [contributed by Kate O.]

Big Book page #102 :

102) Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. You should not hesitate to visit the most sordid spot on earth on such an errand. Keep on the firing line of life with these motives and God will keep you unharmed. (contributed by Beth)
103) The power of God goes deep! [contributed by Kate O.]

Big Book page #114:

104) But sometimes you must start life anew. We know women who have done it. If such women adopt a spiritual way of life their road will be smoother. [contributed by Kate O.]

Big Book page #116:

105) how much better life is when lived on a spiritual plane. [contributed by Kate O.]

Big Book page #117:

106) These work-outs should be regarded as part of your education, for thus you will be learning to live. [contributed by Kate O.]
107) You will make mistakes, but if you are in earnest they will not drag you down. [contributed by Kate O.]
108) Instead, you will capitalize them. [contributed by Kate O.]
109) A better way of life will emerge when they are overcome.

[contributed by Kate O.]

[MajestyJo]

THE TWELVE PROMISES OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS


Readers of the Big Book (third edition) may be surprised when they come upon pages 83 through 84 where twelve promises of joyous living are listed.

A rewarding revelation lies in these promises. Sobriety alone is never enough to guarantee the spiritual progress that leads to serenity.

No mention of alcohol or other drugs is made in the promises. The promises stress freedom from addiction’s bondage. They teach that abstinence can be comfortable if "Easy Does It" is always followed by "But Do It."
Exploring the promises is an adventurous education that never leads to graduation. The primary reason is that sobriety does make promises – and keeps them.

1. WE FIND NEW FREEDOM

The first promise says, "We will know a new freedom and a new happiness." This is a vast change for the alcoholic who always insisted, "I’ll handle it myself when I’m good and ready." But the alcoholic agonized over lack of freedom of choice about drinking.
The first promise assures us complete freedom as our reward for staying with the winners. It encourages us to make wise use of our free choices.
Happiness comes with the peace of mind we experience after we surrender and accept the reality of our addiction. Now we understand the difference between the happiness of sobriety and the false joy the bottle brought. We find a happiness replete with laughter, contrasted with the despair we wallowed in while we were drunk.
The new freedom brings love, honesty, gratitude, humility, positive-ness, faith, hope and trust. Our choices become steps in spiritual growth.
2. OUR REGRETS SUBSIDE
The second promise tells us, "We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it." This assures us freedom from guilt over what we did, what we lost, whom we hurt and what might have been. We can remember the past to benefit from mistakes without dwelling on it.
By benefiting from past misdeeds, we reduce the chance of repeating them. Absence of regrets makes life possible in the now. When we confront the past horrors, we emphasize the lesson that "pain is the price of maturity." In sobriety, we would surely be distraught if the deep hurt we suffered while drinking had all been in vain.
Using the past as a tool for growth, we protect ourselves against slips by avoiding complacency and carelessness. We need not be ashamed or our past, because we know we can bring our character defects into the open, admit them and get help to rid ourselves of them.
When we compare the real joys of sobriety with the fancied pleasures of intoxication we can feel grateful.
3 . WE WILL FIND SERENITY
In the third promise we are told, "We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace." We once drank to kill pain but it only increased our agony. In sobriety, we find we can use our past suffering for emotional growth, healing and peace of mind. While Alcoholism is a disease of denial, recovery in A.A. is based on the truth of the Serenity Prayer, which teaches us acceptance of the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.
Serenity is not a passive attitude but requires constructive action that creates an ideal climate for spiritual growth. With peace of mind, we readily take inventories of both defects and assets in our characters. Selfishness does not grow in an atmosphere of serenity. We cannot be hateful and grateful at the same time. Serenity has been called a passport to the presence of a Higher Power. Serenity makes our forgiveness of others and ourselves possible. It frees us from excessive living and thinking.
4. OUR EXPERIENCES HAVE VALUES
The fourth promise states, "No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others." This promise pointedly reminds alcoholics to look for similarities not differences in fellow A.A. members.
This promise assures us that we belong. We rightfully share a sense of value within society with millions of other recovering addicts. As victims of alcohol, we felt we were less than others. We were full of shame and guilt for what we had become. In our first days in A.A. we believed none of those nice sober people would have anything to do with us if they found out what failures we were.
Surprisingly, we learn our sordid pasts and horrid behaviour can help others to relate to us. We think, "If they can make it, why not me?" Beginners are told, "Keep coming to meetings and you’ll hear your story coming out of the mouths of others." Our drunkologues are never so unique that they won’t be topped again and again by fellow alcoholics.
The practice of holding nothing back helps us identify with others, not compare. The caste system and generation gap go out the window in A.A. We quickly agree our common welfare comes first; personal recovery depends on our unity.
It becomes almost impossible for a recovering alcoholic to deceive fellow members who have already heard all the lies, cop-outs and alibis. Denial, the number one symptom of addiction, gets us nowhere with a group of recovering alcoholics.
One important idea behind this promise is that the realities of drinking will reach not only the "helpless, hopeless boozer" but also the "high-bottom alcoholic" who may be struggling to admit he or she belongs in A.A.
Relating and identifying will always be key words in reaching a drinking, still-suffering alcoholic, because recovering drinkers who tell their past experiences abound with sincerity. Words that come from the heart always reach the hearts of those who need to hear them.
5. SELF-PITY DISAPPEARS
The fifth promise seems improbable to those who are still drinking. It tells us, "That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear." We actually do find our lives becoming manageable.
Before we surrendered to reality, we alcoholics considered ourselves failures. We felt inadequate, undeserving, rejected, unlucky, betrayed and unimportant. "What’s the use? Who cares?" summed up our views on life and death. Self-pity was our only solace.
Self-respect during sobriety will come slowly but steadily. We learn to be patient. The miracle of rediscovering purpose in life comes to us, if we give it time. We find the joy of living, a second lifetime – one filled with caring and sharing and love and service. As we progress from useless to purposeful living, our thinking becomes positive. We act with gratitude and humility.
Constructive thinking reveals we are always basically what we think we are. When we believe ourselves failures, we are failures. When we live free of self-pity and with a positive outlook, we build our open-mindedness and our willingness for spiritual growth.
The antidote for self-pity is action. Self-pity is revealed as selfishness, unwarranted pride and an unhealthy ego. Self-pity is an extension of self-absorption and leads losers to depend on "cop-outs" to explain why the program failed to work for them. Self-pitiers never grasp the truth that a recovery program has few failures but many quitters.
We start feeling sorry for ourselves when our demands are rejected for everything on our terms. We ultimately understand that we can’t work this program our way. We stop trying easier, softer ways and stop holding onto old ideas. Growth becomes easier after we develop a willingness to go to any length to arrive at solid sobriety.
6. INTEREST IN OTHERS GROWS
Any person, whether suffering from an addiction or not, would feel rewarded with "the key to happy, fruitful living" if he or she were the recipient of sobriety’s sixth promise. It states, "We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows."
When we give up the bottle, we also relinquish our envy and self-centeredness. We were extremely colourful liars about our successes. How our hungry egos thrived!
Alcoholics are expert people-pleasers, always hoping to influence others to respond with material or emotional rewards. Kindness merely for the sake of feeling good was an unthinkable waste of opportunity. Most or our drinking was done to benefit only ourselves. We reveled in the false feelings of pleasure, power and importance that alcohol brought us. Alcohol made us believe we were somebody. Even when misery followed a binge, we usually felt the lift we’d experienced was worth the price. Sadly, the agony got progressively worse.
It is a drinker’s self-centeredness that disregards the symptoms of our disease and the warnings of loved ones. Our egos, a potent factor during drinking, can continue to retard our spiritual progress. Few things in life are more rewarding than the realization that we enjoy helping others and sharing solutions instead of working overtime to attract attention to ourselves. We find that generosity without thought of return is a cure for problems. It becomes evident that people who share freely seldom sink into depression. We become aware that faulty thinking can be the root of our depression.
Since reaction to people, places and things is a source of depression, positive thinking depends on close contact with other people. That requires action. We need to focus outside ourselves on the mainstream of life.
Sharing is the key to enjoying the sixth promise. We begin to practice the slogan, "We can do what I can’t." By exchanging ideas and experiences with one another, we rid ourselves of emotions that enable selfishness to flourish – pride, vanity, self-righteousness, jealousy, self-pity, resentment and condemnation. Interest in others that prompts giving and sharing takes us far from that drunken existence where complained that the world owed us a lot and never paid off. When sober, we do more than make friends; we understand how to be friends.
7. GRANDIOSITY DISAPPEARS
The seventh promise of sobriety is, "Self-seeking will slip away." This promise becomes one of the benefits of sobriety, when we are aware that we have made spiritual progress.
Before recovery, we always insisted our drinking was nobody’s business. Our attitude constantly put us on the defensive. We were sure we had to protect our rights. Self-seeking and self-indulgence seemed wholly justified.
In recovery, we realize self-centeredness created that stubborn denial that kept us from surrendering. We realize how much help we need. Our grandiosity has to go.
It was natural while we were drinking to exalt our egos. If we are self-made successes in a professional field, we can easily begin to worship our creators – ourselves. Egotists devote little time to character growth. Any potential change for the better is restrained by a lack of humility, even when a drinker grows tired of misery. An active alcoholic lacks open-mindedness. Though often wrong, drinkers never doubt they are right. Only when an admission and acceptance show them they are just human, no more or less, are they ready to welcome helping hands.
Acceptance in recovery is without reservation, but never with the feeling we are simply resigned to our disease. We see self-seeking as only an inferiority complex turned inside out. As our self-centeredness slips away, humility will make a quiet entrance. The recovering alcoholic becomes teachable and will never stop learning new truths.
As our self-seeking diminishes, humility allows us to listen. Arrogant persons are not ready to hear. Unless we hear, we cannot grow. One early lesson for us is that sobriety does not make A.A. members "fellows in virtue" but sharers of character defects who are helping one another lose those faults.
We find that change is a must for us. Without it, we cannot take the vital inventories that identify our shortcomings. Without change, old ideas will dominate our lives. All change must come from within us. Nobody else can alter us. Not even A.A. plays that role; it simply gives us the tools to change ourselves.
Results depend on how much we want to change, how hard we are willing to work and how open to advice from experienced friends our minds are. If we take the suggested Steps of Recovery, it will be impossible not to change. In making changes, it is well to remember the adage; "You must first empty the old, dirty water from the pitcher before you can fill it with new, clean water."
8. OUR OUTLOOK BRIGHTENS
The eighth promise is far-reaching. It states, "Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change." As drinkers, the only important changes for were external – different watering holes, different drinks, different mixes, different friends. We blamed everything but alcohol for the pain we suffered and the mishaps we encountered. We didn’t even admit the one obvious change: Our lives grew progressively worse, no matter what we tried.
In recovery, we begin to accept life as it happens, not as we would like it to be or as we believed the bottle would make it. With our new attitudes, we no longer seek others to validate our behaviour and our opinions. We no longer seek compliments, knowing that such praise is really fragile and short-lived. We learn that the less we seek approval, the more we receive. We see the importance of satisfying ourselves instead of inviting applause from others. We strive to live up to our potential while making sure we work wisely within our limitations.
We discover in a fellowship like A.A. that our true worth remains after all material things are gone. The things in life with lasting value can never be taken from us. We become aware that truth is unchangeable. Our approach to truth, however, can change for the worse if we permit old ideas to dominate our outlook on life. We must remember no one can hurt us unless we permit him or her to. We cannot prevent what happens to us but we are always responsible for how we react to our experiences. A positive attitude will determine our responses.
In recovery, we change our approach from hostile and negative to positive and friendly. It becomes obvious that a wrong attitude will build as much guilt within us as a wrong deed. A changed attitude will not lead us to believe everything will be perfect but we will confront life on realistic not fanciful terms. Furthermore, the self-loathing of our guilty drunken selves will give way to higher self-esteem.
Our new attitude will include looking at line one day at a time. Thus, we escape the persistent guilt from the past and the fear of the future. This outlook includes examining each day as it ends. This always produces an active gratitude within us. We find it is not enough to feel grateful; we must express gratitude through love and service to others.
9. OUR FEARS DECREASE
The ninth promise strikes down unwarranted fear. It states "Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us." Since courage has been described as fear that has said its prayers, we become accustomed to praying for God’s will for us. The insight this brings convinces us our fears come from within ourselves, not from others. We will no longer have to be defensive or blame people, places and circumstances for what we do or say. We will discover we may have become our own worst enemy, but we don’t have to be this way. It is rewarding to make and keep friends instead of antagonizing everyone around us because we fear confrontations. We used to be quarrelsome drinkers, unaware that anger often covered fear.
In sobriety, decreased fear reduces envy, low self-esteem, resentments and feelings of rejection and frustration. In A.A., we lose our loneliness, our starting point for fear of others. We can find love and trust in new friends who remind us, "Everything is going to be all right…This, too, shall pass…Things will get better and better."
Involvement with others is the magic that dissolves fear. Where there is unity, there is no room for conflict. There are no strangers in caring and sharing programs, only new friends not yet met. In a fellowship of recovering addicts, we are all people who need people.
Love in sobriety is demonstrated by wishing someone else well; being available; having interest in others and sharing sympathy, understanding, kindness, honesty and humility.
The ninth promise also assures us freedom from the fear of financial insecurity. This does not mean we will be showered with possessions or become affluent. We will not always get what we want, but we will receive what we need to enjoy sobriety.
10. COPING BECOMES EASIER
Although our recovery program is simple, it is not easy. The tenth promise addresses this: "We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us." Experience teaches us to stop complicating everything. We are told, "If it works, don’t fix it."
As drinkers, life was never easy or unhurried. In recovery, we grow emotionally through countless lessons that are a joy to experience and live the philosophy of Easy Does It or One Day At a Time. Time is a great teacher and each approach to life that we master stays with us forever. Like riding a bicycle, recovery may be puzzling at first but, once we learn, we will never forget.
The tenth promise guarantees that, as our sobriety continues and strengthens, we will grow spiritually. An intuitive know-how indicates change and change means progress. Even though change is constant, we will never reach perfection because humans never attain perfection.
In early recovery, a major change we experience is our growing concern for other people. It is said all humans are born selfish and addiction accentuates this trait. In sobriety, we begin to care about others. Changes come – sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly – but always surely.
Working the Steps of Recovery will be the foundation for our intuition in solving problems. We can benefit from the advice others give us and we can replace old useless ideas with workable ones. A large part of intuition involves faith. We experience an awareness of reality and our thought process becomes more mature. We instinctively begin to do the right thing at the right time.
11. OUR SPIRITUALITY GROWS
The eleventh promise assures us spiritual growth will be a part of our sobriety. This promise states, "We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves." When drinking, we had little faith in prayer. Our impatience never allowed us to understand good things must come in God’s time, not ours. Grandiosity kept us from turning anything over to God. Even when we felt a need for help, we were usually resigned to our drinking problem. Our ego told us if we got out of the driver’s seat, we’d lose control.
Yet, once we permit God to do what we cannot, we find happiness we never before knew existed. We learn what it is to share with love. We discover that once we recognize God’s will for us, we still have the responsibility of changing ourselves and carrying out His will.
The eleventh promise informs us we must completely over problems that are beyond our control. As this promise materializes for us, we will have better understanding of God and His power. Finding God may seem to great a task, but a sincere search for Him will sustain our spiritual progress. God will always be too great an entity for humans to understand entirely, but all our efforts at awareness will build a strong faith that unlocks to doors to acceptance. When we have faith, we have made the first move toward letting go and letting God do for us hat we cannot do.
In this relationship with a Higher Power, faith leads to trust. The less we press at being spiritual, the more spiritual we become. Once we find a satisfying relationship with a Higher Power, we will know we can never again ‘play God’ with the lives of others.
Obviously, contact with God must be through prayer and meditation, our communication system with our Higher Power. So long as we have faith that the eleventh promise will be part of our sobriety, we will develop confidence and we will make the spiritual progress necessary for continued sobriety. Trust in this promise will make us aware that we will never walk alone, not matter where we travel in sobriety.
12. THE PROMISES EVOLVE THROUGH EFFORT
The twelfth promise sums up all the others and is probably the most rewarding of all. It asserts, "All the promises of Sobriety will always materialize if we work for them.
Whether the promises materialize quickly or slowly depends on the amount of work we do. It is like taking a picture; we get back what we focus on. Unless we follow instructions in every effort, we are going to lose more than we win. Patience is a necessity to complete each step of spiritual growth. Patient people see the difference between true solutions and circumstances that are nothing but problems in disguise.
In our growth process, we discover winners are tenacious listeners in any ‘learning’ group while losers are usually impatient to express their opinions. Growth comes through love. Recovering alcoholics find it is more important to give love than to be loved. Haphazard action will never bring these promises to fruition. We must direct our efforts carefully by knowing what is happening and being among those who are constantly making things happen.


Was written by the man who wrote the meditations book 24 Hours A Day.

Discussion group registered in New York as part of Freedom of Recovery until the group closed in 2003.

Love the promises, they were the reason I kept coming back. I didn't think I was an alcoholic, but when I heard them I thought, "I want what they have." Really only wanted the first one, the others didn't matter. Freedom and happiness seemed enough, the rest were bonus.

[MajestyJo]

These are what gave me hope, our group Freedom of Recovery had a Promises meeting on Friday nights, and we used the long version for the topic of discussion. A lot of people fought us about it saying it wasn't AA material, but it was registered and okayed by New York. I think because the man who wrote them was the man who wrote Twenty-Four Hours a Day (hardcover), and I met a lot of long-timers who considered it their Bible after the Big Book, they were worn, pages were coloured and lose and held together by an elastic band or two.

The promises have come true many times over in my life. I like the phrase, "We will be amazed before we are half way through (the Steps), because of having worked the Steps, we change although we are not the first ones to see, but for me, on the most part it was "a feel" that my God was with me and I wasn't alone.

[MajestyJo]

Are the promises still coming true in your life? If not, what are you not doing in your recovery. This is a one day at a time program. It is progress not perfection. This is a program of practice, practice, practice. Practice the principles in all our affairs.

[MajestyJo]

When I left the recovery house in December 13, 1991, I went to two meetings a day for two years. On Tuesday nights they had The Promises meeting at 10 p.m. and I went to my third meeting of the day. It was the promises that kept me coming back even though I was in denial about my alcoholism.