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Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please.

 
 
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Old 10-23-2016, 08:00 AM   #1
bluidkiti
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 73,736
Default Old Is When

Old Is When

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear
loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing,
I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just
"chunky dunk."

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we
could simply press 'Ctrl-Alt-Delete' and start all over?

Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize
you haven't fallen asleep yet.

My husband says I never listen to him. At least I think
that's what he said.

If raising children was going to be easy, it never would
have started with something called labor!

Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells remain FOREVER.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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