Wisdom Of The Rooms - 2021

[bluidkiti]

September 20

Quote of the Week

"Don’t let your expectations exceed your acceptance."

Through recovery, I have discovered a wonderful way to avoid disappointment, anxiety, and resentment. I simply check my level of expectation about any upcoming—or current—event, interaction, or situation. Because I find that my expectations are invariably driven by my selfish needs or desires, and because situations or interactions rarely go the way I want them to, my solution is to monitor my expectations first and ask myself if I’m okay with whatever actually unfolds. If not, then that’s my problem.

Before recovery, I had neither the awareness nor the tools to access or deal with my often unconscious need to have things go my way. As such, my expectations—of myself and others—often exceeded not only how things went, but blew past my ability to accept things as they were. In fact, I had little to no acceptance at all. As such, I regularly had resentments, often formed negative opinions in advance, and was generally not pleasant to be around.

Today, thankfully, I have some tools. I know enough to recognize in advance that I am not in control of people, places, or things, and that the best thing I can do is focus on the part I can control—my level of acceptance. This is easier if I remember the saying “Everything happens in God’s time.” When I do, I find I can let go and relax. Developing the proper level of acceptance around all the situations in my life allows me to watch God’s will, and not mine, unfold. Today, I’m much happier because I don’t let my expectations exceed my acceptance.