Today's Thought - March

[bluidkiti]

March 15

AA Thought for the Day

After I became an alcoholic, alcohol poisoned my love for my family and friends, it poisoned my ambition, it poisoned my self-respect. It poisoned my whole life, until I met AA. My life is happier now than it has been for a long time. I don't want to commit suicide. So with the help of God and AA, I'm not going to take any more of that alcoholic poison into my system. And I'm going to keep training my mind never even to think of liquor again in any way except as a poison. Do I believe that liquor will poison my life if I ever touch it again?
Meditation for the Day

I will link up my frail nature with the limitless Divine Power. I will link my life with the Divine Force for Good in the world. It is not the passionate appeal that gains Divine attention as much as the quiet placing of the difficulty and worry in the Divine Hands. So I will trust God like a child who places its tangled skein of wool in the hands of a loving parent to unravel. We please God more by our unquestioning confidence than by imploring Him for help.
Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may put all my difficulties in God's hands and leave them there. I pray that I may fully trust God to take care of them.

Today's reading is from the book Twenty-Four Hours a Day: A Spiritual Resource with Practical Applications for Daily Life*

[bluidkiti]

March 16

H.A.L.T.

~AA Slogan

H.A.L.T. stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired. These feelings can be of danger to us. They can lead us away from our program.

We need to eat regular meals. When we get too hungry, we get cranky. Then we say and do things we regret.

We need to turn anger over to our Higher Power, or else our anger can turn into rage.

We need friends to help us in recovery. If we get too lonely, we may turn to our addictive ways for friendship. We don't stay sober by ourselves.

We need a clear mind to deal with life. If we get too tired, we tend to feel sorry for ourselves. Being tired gets us into crazy thinking.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, remind me to H.A.L.T. Help me to not get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired.
Action for the Day

Today, I'll review the four parts of H.A.L.T. In which areas do I practice good self-care? In which areas do I not? How can I improve?

Today's reading is from the book Keep it Simple: Daily Meditations for Twelve Step Beginnings and Renewal*

[bluidkiti]

March 17

My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.

~Clarence Budington Kelland

We learn much of what we need to know about being men from models we have in other men. Some of us have fond memories of being next to our fathers and imitating their ways. Many of us also have the feeling of a gap in our models. Perhaps our fathers weren't around enough, or we may have rejected some of their habits and values, creating an uncertainty about masculine roles. We may feel unsure of ourselves, or we may berate ourselves for what we don't know.

It is well to remember how much we have already learned in our adult years. It is never too late. No man ever reaches adulthood having learned everything from his father that he will need to know about masculinity. We can look around us for more models in the men we know. For a man to be our model, we first choose someone we admire and then get to know him well. In this way, we carry on the human tradition of one man learning from another.

I am continuing to grow, and I can learn from the men I know now.

Today's reading is from the book Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men*

[bluidkiti]

March 18

Feel Them to Heal Them

The thing about painful emotions is that you just can't reason with them. Before I started my recovery journey, most of my life was devoted to finding ways not to feel. Bless them always, but neither of my parents were into expressing "negative" feelings - not ours and not theirs. Messages like "Dry those tears" and "Oh, just never mind" and the popular-back-then admonition "I'll give you something to cry for" were ever-present in our home.

In early recovery, I spent a lot of time exploring my feelings intellectually but still trying to avoid experiencing them. That worked for a short while. Over time, I became willing to excavate the deep, dark, painful feelings that I had buried for so long. Working through those feelings meant a lot of tear-soaked days in therapy, crying so hard that every muscle in my face ached. Feeling hard feelings is exhausting, but not as exhausting as running from them. Bringing those dark emotions to the surface, feeling them, and then releasing them is an act of self-love.

Feeling and processing sadness
can make room for more happiness.

Today's reading is from the book She Recovers Every Day: Meditations for Women*

[bluidkiti]

March 19

Being kind

Saying an unkind word to another may not inflict a lifelong hurt on that person, but what does it do to us? It separates us from our spiritual fellowship, which we cannot afford.

It is when we are out of step, out of harmony, that we are vulnerable to taking that first fix, drink, or pill. So it will help us all to be kind to others (even to those who don't seem to appreciate it).

Am I kind to others?

Higher Power, help me show kindness to all my brothers and sisters, even when it is difficult, as you have shown kindness to me.

I will show kindness today by...

Today's reading is from the book Day by Day: Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts*

[bluidkiti]

March 20

Dead, in their roots all flowers keep the light.

~Theodore Roethke

All flowers begin with the potential to grow and blossom. Yet in winter, perennial flowers are buried under the snow. Inside the dark earth, they are patiently waiting for their time to bloom. For the flowers, faith is believing that spring will return. It is carrying the light of summer deep in their roots so that even in times of cold and dark, there is hope that they will bloom again.

When spring does return, they shoot out of the ground and burst into blossom. In times of light, they drink it deep into their roots - deep enough to sustain them through the next season of darkness.

We can do the same, keeping the memory of good times deep within us, so that when we're feeling low, it will keep our faith in the happy future strong.

What helps sustain my faith today?

Today's reading is from the book Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families*

[bluidkiti]

March 21

Reflection for the Day

If I am troubled, worried, exasperated, or frustrated, do I tend to rationalize the situation and lay the blame on someone else? When I am in such a state, is my conversation punctuated with "He did . . . ," "She said . . . ," "They did . . ."? Or can I honestly admit that perhaps I'm at fault? My peace of mind depends on overcoming my negative attitudes and tendency toward rationalization. Will I try, day by day, to be rigorously honest with myself?
Today I Pray

May I catch myself as I talk in the third person - "He did . . ." or "They promised . . ." or "She said she would . . ." - and listen for the blaming that has become such a pattern for me and preserves delusion. May I do a turnabout and face myself instead.
Today I Will Remember

Honesty is the only policy.

Today's reading is from the book A Day at a Time: Daily Reflections for Recovering People*

[bluidkiti]

March 22

When we do for other people what they should do for themselves, we both stay stuck.

Perhaps it's human nature to grow and change only when we have to. Unrelenting pain can serve as a motivator. Sometimes ultimatums are effective too. But making excuses for others or taking over their responsibilities, even when it's for their benefit, never inspires change. Most of us came into the program because we wanted someone else to change! Now we're learning that the only change we can be certain of is one we make in ourselves.

One of the first changes we can make is to let go of others: their opinions, their behavior, their responsibilities. Our need for them to fulfill our expectations is related to our insecurity, not theirs. Every time we preach or take on others' duties, we must recognize that we are preventing much-needed growth, ours and theirs.

Our intentions might always have been good. But the time has come to let others live their own lives. It's quite enough to take care of ourselves.

I will not do someone else's task today. Growth comes from each of us being responsible for ourselves.

Today's reading is from the book A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance*

[bluidkiti]

March 23

When we meet someone, we say, "Hello, cousin," or "Hello, Grandfather." And this is not merely symbolic, but a reminder that we have a family.

~Gene Thin Elk

In our need and enthusiasm for declaring loyalty to new supportive communities and families of our own choice, we may forget that we are part of the larger human family. This family includes children and old people. It includes those whose gender or sexual orientation differs from ours. It includes members of other groups that experience oppression, as well as people whose lives we consider privileged - those we assume have no experience of suffering comparable to our own. All are worthy of our compassion.

In recovery programs, we discover people who seem different from us but who share with us feelings and experiences common to those living with addiction. As we look around us and acknowledge a variety of other people, as we pray for the wellbeing of those whom we know and those whom we don't know, our spirits grow. Our narrow definitions of kin and community expand to include all members of the human family.

Today, I affirm with love my connection to the human family.

Today's reading is from the book Glad Day

[willbe275]

Hey Tammy, question,
Do you read your message?

[bluidkiti]

March 24

Wants and Needs

Part of taking responsibility for ourselves means taking responsibility for what we want and need, and knowing that's okay to do.

Learning to tune-in to ourselves, learning to listen to ourselves, is an art. It takes practice. We can use our ability to guess what others want and need, and apply that skill to ourselves.

What does it sound like we might want and need? What would we guess would help us feel better? What are our feelings telling us? Our body? Our mind? Our intuition?

If we ask, then listen closely; we'll hear the answer. We are wiser than we think, and we can be trusted. What we want and need counts. It's important, and it's valid. It's okay to learn to participate in meeting our own needs.

We can learn to identify what we want and need and be patient with ourselves while we're learning.

Today, I will pay attention to what I want and need. I will not discount myself.

Today's reading is from the book The Language of Letting Go: Daily Meditations on Codependency*

[bluidkiti]

Originally Posted by willbe275

Hey Tammy, question,
Do you read your message?

Yes I do willbe

[bluidkiti]

March 25

As long as habit and routine dictate the pattern of living, new dimensions of the soul will not emerge.

~Henry Van Dyke

If nothing changes, nothing changes.

One reason people read books like this one or throng to meetings is they want change - if not total change, then at least a modification of the portions of their lives that cause them distress. There are always reasons for our being stuck in the places we are. Those reasons are often our habits and patterns. If the painful consequences of whatever we find hurtful in our lives are frequent and recurring, we have a negative pattern.

As long as those habits and patterns remain unchallenged, of course there will be nothing new. Habits are like machines routinely, consistently, stamping out the same product year after year. They can do nothing else. They are made to create that specific product.

Change demands new behaviors, new thoughts, and possibly new surroundings. Change demands the willingness to go to war with old habits. Frightening - yes. Exciting - even more so!

I am willing to risk the security of old ways for the prospect of happy, new tomorrows.

Today's reading is from the book Days of Healing, Days of Joy: Daily Meditations for Adult Children*

[bluidkiti]

March 26

It is better to begin in the evening than not at all.

~English Proverb

At times, we addicts feel bad that we lost years to our illness. We've wasted time, money, and energy on our addiction. Those days are gone. Let us not look behind except when our program and the Steps ask us to. We only look behind to see the mistakes we made for one reason - in order to not make them again.

Today we look forward. Today is a day to celebrate and live our sobriety to its fullest. We should embrace each moment of sobriety and live it with dignity and integrity. When we do this, we increase our chances of being sober tomorrow. Each day that we act from care instead of from self-pity, we learn how to be caring. If we are thankful this evening for today's sobriety, we increase our chances of having gratitude follow us into tomorrow.
Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me to have gratitude for each moment of sobriety as they add up into days, weeks, months, and years. Help me to see that my future depends on how well I surrender to you in the moment. Help me to use the evenings to look forward, not behind me.
Today's Action

I will write out six ways that my life and world will be better as I stay sober one day, one moment at a time.

Today's reading is from the book God Grant Me: More Daily Meditations from the Authors of Keep It Simple*

[bluidkiti]

March 27

Treat a work of art like a prince: let it speak to you first.

~Arthur Schopenhauer

Many of us have felt that we should have and give an opinion about everything right away. After a movie or a concert, for example, we may want to step right in with our comments and judgments. Often we "shoot from the hip," without thinking or being attentive to our feelings or the feelings of others.

This can be a way of warding off the experience, enclosing it within words. All of us have feared that we might be caught off guard and compelled to change or expand our own ideas; we feel fear because the process leaves us vulnerable!

Watching a movie or a play, hearing music and lyrics, seeing works of art: these can open us up to the unfamiliar and the new, and if we are quiet and attentive, we can come to fresh insights and understandings. So, too, with people. If we are patient and willing to listen, we will always be learning and growing through contact with others.

The beauty and joy of life dwell within differences. I am learning to be open and attentive to what has not been part of my existence up to now, so that it may come to color and enhance my life.

Today's reading is from the book Answers in the Heart