Daily Recovery Readings - November

[bluidkiti]

November 16

Daily Reflections

A DAILY REPRIEVE

What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual
condition.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 85

Maintaining my spiritual condition is like working out every day, planning for the
marathon, swimming laps, jogging. It's staying in good shape spiritually, and that requires
prayer and meditation. The single most important way for me to improve my conscious
contact with a Higher Power is to pray and meditate. I am as powerless over alcohol as I
am to turn back the waves of the sea; no human force had the power to overcome my
alcoholism. Now I am able to breathe the air of joy, happiness and wisdom. I have the
power to love and react to events around me with the eyes of a faith in things that are not
readily apparent. My daily reprieve means that, no matter how difficult or painful
things appear today, I can draw on the power of the program to stay liberated from my
cunning, baffling and powerful illness.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I have got rid of most of my inner conflicts. I was always at war with myself. I was doing
things that I did not want to do. I was waking up in strange places and wondering how I
got there. I was full of recklessness when I was drunk and full of remorse when I was
sober. My life didn't make sense. It was full of broken resolves and frustrated hopes and
plans. I was getting nowhere fast. No wonder my nerves were all shot. I was bumping up
against a blank wall and I was dizzy from it. A.A. taught me how to get organized and to
stop fighting against myself. Have I got rid of inner conflicts?

Meditation For The Day

"When two or three are gathered together in My name, there am I in the midst of them."
The spirit of God comes upon His followers when they are all together at one time, in one
place, and with one accord. When two or three consecrated souls are together at a
meeting place, the spirit of God is there to help and guide them. Where any sincere group
of people are together, reverently seeking the help of God, His power and His spirit are
there to inspire them.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be in accord with the members of my group.
I pray that I may feel the strength of a consecrated group.

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As Bill Sees It

Forgiveness, p. 318

Through the vital Fifth Step, we began to get the feeling that we could
be forgiven, no matter what we had thought or done.

Often it was while working on this Step with our sponsors or spiritual
advisers that we first felt truly able to forgive others, no matter how
deeply we felt they had wronged us.

Our moral inventory had persuaded us that all-round forgiveness was
desirable, but it was only when we resolutely tackled Step Five that
we inwardly knew we'd be able to receive forgiveness and give it, too.

12 & 12, pp. 57-58

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Walk In Dry Places

Continuing to follow
A child learning to ride a bicycle discovers that it only take gentle pedaling to keep the bike in motion. The more difficult task was getting on the bike and maintaining a straight course in the right direction.
Staying sober in AA seems to be the same kind of thing. It may take a lot of effort and self-honesty to establish sobriety, but a routine of simple steps can keep it going on a daily basis. For most people, daily meditations and regular attendance at meetings are enough to maintain a straight course in the right direction.
The danger comes when people become too lazy or careless to take even these simple steps. Then, like a bike losing forward momentum, they can wobble and fall.
Even at the point of wobbling, one can get a bike up to speed again and gain stability. This is something to remember if we find our own sobriety becoming wobbly.
Nothing can be so important today that it keeps me from doing the simple things needed for continuous sobriety. I'll remember the bike.

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Keep It Simple

Pray for powers equal to your task.---Phillips Brooks
Our task is to stay sober and to help others who still suffer from addiction. We will need patience and understanding. We will need much love. Most of all, we’ll need to work a strong program.
Pray that you come to know the Steps well. Pray that you’ll want to help others---always. Pray for these things, and you’ll have a strong program. In the program, we learn that prayer works. We see prayer change our lives and the lives of those around us. We came to know the power of prayer.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I pray for knowledge of Your will for me and the power to carry it out.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll admit my needs by praying for help from my Higher Power.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Rigidity is prevented most of the time as love and compassion mesh us into tolerant human beings. --Kaethe S. Crawford
Looking outward with love, offering it freely to our friends and family, makes fluid, flowing, and fertile our existence. Each expression of love engenders more love, keeping tender our ties to one another, encouraging more ties.
The more flexible our lives, the more easily we'll be attracted to an unexpected opportunity. And flexibility is fostered by a loving posture. As we approach the world, so it greets us. We are not mere recipients of life's trials and tribulations. We find what our eyes are wanting to see. When our focus is rigid and narrow, so are our opportunities.
The Steps are leading us to be freer with our love, more tolerant in our expectations. The level of our compassion, fully felt and fully expressed, is the measure of our emotional health. Rigid attitudes, rigid behavior, rigid expectations of others recede as the level of our emotional health rises. Our approach to life changes and so do the results we meet.
I will love others. It's my only assignment in life, and it guarantees the security I crave.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

If he is enthusiastic your cooperation will mean a great deal. If he is lukewarm or thinks he is not an alcoholic, we suggest you leave him alone. Avoid urging him to follow our program. The seed has been planted in his mind. He knows that thousands of men, much like himself, have recovered. But don’t remind him of this after he has been drinking, for he may be angry. Sooner or later, you are likely to find him reading the book once more. Wait until repeated stumbling convinces him he must act, for the more you hurry him the longer his recovery may be delayed.

p. 113

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

My son called his grandparents, and they traveled to the mountains to visit us. I had not seen them for years. We got along much better than I expected. The relationship they formed with my son was incredible. My dad took his grandson hiking in the wilderness, and mom helped out with looking after him while I worked. My health continued to fail. My parents wound up moving to our town in an attempt to help their grandson and me.

p. 463

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

All these failings generate fear, a soul-sickness in its own right. Then fear, in turn, generates more character defects. Unreasonable fear that our instincts will not be satisfied drives us to covet the possessions of others, to lust for sex and power, to become angry when our instinctive demands are threatened, to be envious when the ambitions of others seem to be realized while ours are not. We eat, drink, and grab for more of everything than we need, fearing we shall never have enough. And with genuine alarm at the prospect of work, we stay lazy. We loaf and procrastinate, or at best work grudgingly and under half steam. These fears are the termites that ceaselessly devour the foundations of whatever sort of life we try to build.

p. 49

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Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love
what you are doing, you will be successful.
--Dr. Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965)

If I have the opportunity to help one person today, I'll have done something
worthwhile if I've helped at least one person today.
--RJabo3

Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?
--unknown

Joy isn't the absence of pain -- it's the presence of God.
--unknown

A B C = Acceptance, Belief, Change.

"If you were walking back from a well, carrying a bucket of water & someone jostled you,
there could be spilled from the bucket only that which it contained. As you walk along the
way of life, people are constantly bumping into you. If your heart is full of ill nature, bad
temper, and ugly disposition, only those things will be spilled from it. On the other hand, if
it is full of love, you will spill a smile or pleasant remark. You can spill from your bucket
only that which it contains."
--Author Unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

FRIENDSHIP

"True friendship comes when
silence between two people is
comfortable."
-- Dave Tyson Gentry

Part of the spiritual life that awakens serenity is silence or stillness. "Be still and
know that I am God." I believe that true friendship is divine. It is a special love that
binds two hearts as one. It is a comfortableness that is the opposite of dis-ease.
Friendship is necessary to recovery and it involves the sharing of feelings. Often
the feelings are silent; unspoken emotions; cherished moments that exist in
"word-less-ness".

As a recovering alcoholic, I have a thousand friends who attest to the silent witness of
love by simply being there.

Thank You for the joy of friendship that grows in silence.

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"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end."
Lamentations 3:22

God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the
righteousness of God.
2 Corinthians 5:21

For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness,
peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
Romans 14:17

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Daily Inspiration

Life is a challenge so accept it for what it truly is. Lord, help me face what today brings with energy, determination and a joy that allows me to take control.

Pray about every task that you take on today and don't take on those tasks which you have no time to pray about. Lord, tonight I will rest well because today You and I will accomplish many things. Thank You for Your constant blessings in my life.

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NA Just For Today

Alone No More

"We gradually and carefully pull ourselves out of the isolation and loneliness of addiction and into the mainstream of life."
Basic Text p. 35

Many of us spent much of our using time alone, avoiding other people - especially people who were not using - at all costs. After years of isolation, trying to find a place for ourselves in a bustling, sometimes boisterous fellowship is not always easy. We may still feel isolated, focusing on our differences rather than our similarities. The overwhelming feelings that often arise in early recovery-feelings of fear, anger, and mistrust-can also keep us isolated. We may feel like aliens but we must remember, the alienation is ours, not NA's.

In Narcotics Anonymous, we are offered a very special opportunity for friendship. We are brought together with people who understand us like no one else can. We are encouraged to share with these people our feelings, our problems, our triumphs, and our failures. Slowly, the recognition and identification we find in NA bridge the lonely gap of alienation in our hearts. As we've heard it said - the program works, if we let it.

Just for today: The friendship of other members of the fellowship is a life-sustaining gift. I will reach out for the friendship that's offered in NA, and accept it.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
One is forever throwing away substance for shadows. --Jennie Jerome Churchill
Sometimes we trade possessions with our friends. Maybe we want to add to our collection, or perhaps we just do it to get someone to like us. But if we try to buy friendship, we'll be sad later when we realize we've lost a prized possession and not gained a friend.
Our friendships come when we least expect them, often with people who have something in common with us. They will not be friendships we have to buy, but relationships to treasure and have for years. These friendships will teach us to respect ourselves and our friends.
Am I making good friends, or bad trades?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A wise man never loses anything if he have himself. --Montaigne
As recovering men, perhaps we have learned more fully what it means to have ourselves because we know the extremes of losing ourselves. In the past we weren't honest with others, or ourselves we didn't have our self-respect, and our compulsive actions violated our values. In that condition, we were incapable of believing in ourselves or of standing up for ourselves. Some of us felt like phonies or nobodies.
In this program we pray for wisdom, and it comes to us as we take possession of ourselves. We develop a better match between our inner feelings and our outer actions. We become willing to make choices, and we are able to take a stand based on our personal feelings and hunches. The things we possess like our gadgets, our cars, or our audio equipment are just temporary. Our integrity, our selves, can never be taken from us.
Today, I am grateful for the growing feeling within that who I am and what I believe is acceptable to me.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Rigidity is prevented most of the time as love and compassion mesh us into tolerant human beings. --Kaethe S. Crawford
Looking outward with love, offering it freely to our friends and family, makes fluid, flowing, and fertile our existence. Each expression of love engenders more love, keeping tender our ties to one another, encouraging more ties.
The more flexible our lives, the more easily we'll be attracted to an unexpected opportunity. And flexibility is fostered by a loving posture. As we approach the world, so it greets us. We are not mere recipients of life's trials and tribulations. We find what our eyes are wanting to see. When our focus is rigid and narrow, so are our opportunities.
The Steps are leading us to be freer with our love, more tolerant in our expectations. The level of our compassion, fully felt and fully expressed, is the measure of our emotional health. Rigid attitudes, rigid behavior, rigid expectations of others recede as the level of our emotional health rises. Our approach to life changes and so do the results we meet.
I will love others. It's my only assignment in life, and it guarantees the security I crave.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
The Victim Trap
The belief that life has to be hard and difficult in the belief that makes a martyr.
We can change our negative beliefs about life, and whether we have the power to stop our pain and take care of ourselves.
We aren't helpless. We can solve our problems. We do have power - not to change or control others, but to solve the problems that are ours to solve.
Using each problem that comes our way to "prove" that life is hard and we are helpless - this is codependency. It's the victim trap.
Life does not have to be difficult. In fact, it can be smooth. Life is good. We don't have to "awfulize" it, or ourselves. We don't have to live on the underside.
We do have power, more power than we know, even in the difficult times. And the difficult times don't prove life is bad; they are part of the ups and downs of life; often, they work out for the best.
We can change our attitude; we can change ourselves; sometimes, we can change our circumstances.
Life is challenging. Sometimes, there's more pain than we asked for; sometimes, there's more joy than we imagined.
It's all part of the package, and the package is good.
We are not victims of life. We can learn to remove ourselves as victims of life. By letting go of our belief that life has to be hard and difficult, we make our life much easier.
Today, God, help me let go of my belief that life is so hard, so awful, or so difficult. Help me replace that belief with a healthier, more realistic view.


Today I know that it does not matter if I cannot see the end of the road. I have absolute faith and trust that I am walking in the right direction and that I am being guided along the way. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

It’s Safe to Open Your Heart

You don’t have to be so afraid to love. You don’t have to fear losing your soul. You learned that lesson. It’s in the past. That doesn’t mean that people won’t try to control or manipulate you. Doesn’t mean that at times, you won’t try to control or manipulate them. Doesn’t mean that people with problems, agendas, addictions, and issues won’t sometimes come into your life. They may.

But the lessons of the past are yours, yours to keep. It may take you a moment to remember, but you will. Be gentle with yourself. Open up slowly, carefully, as you’re able.

It’s not that life and people are different, although how we see life and view people probably has changed. We’re different. We’ve learned about our powers. We’ve learned to take care of ourselves. We’ve learned how capable we really are.

Don’t be so afraid to love. Now it’s time to learn about the powers of the heart.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Be persistent

Earlier in this book, I talked about little drops of rain, over the years, could wear pockets and indentations into stones. I used this as an analogy to demonstrate how negative influences could wear away our resolve.

It goes both ways.

When I was first in recovery, one of the treatment center staff gave me one good quality about myself when I couldn’t see or find anything about myself to like.

“You’re persistent,” he said.

“Yes,” I thought. “You’re right. I am.”

I also thought if I took one-half the energy I used doing destructive things and channeled it into doing positive activities, there wouldn’t be anything in the world I couldn’t do.

Most of us are persistent. We persistently dwell. We have persistently tried to change what we cannot, usually a circumstance or someone else’s behavior. Take that energy, that persistence, that deoermination, that almost obsessive resolve, and persevere with the things you can do.

Don’t push.

Let go of concern about the seemingly impossible tasks in your life. Softly, steadily, like the rain, let your kind spirit naturally remove the obstacles in your path.

Life is better when we flow.

But sometimes it takes persistent flow to change the things we can.

Enough water, persistently applied, can be more powerful than rock.

God, grant me the courage to persevere and the strength to persist.

*****

You are reading from the book Food for Thought.

Alive to Truth

Being alive to truth requires being in touch with ourselves and with our Higher Power. It requires that we value spiritual truth more than material things. We come to realize that the insights and emotional growth we gain through this program are more valuable than the things we used to think we had to have.

Being alive to truth involves living each present moment. If we are obsessed with the past or preoccupied with the future, we will miss the truth of now. Today we can be who we are and give of our best in whatever situation we find ourselves.

Our Higher Power promises that if we ask for truth, we shall receive it. It will be found when we seek it more than status, money, or physical comfort. When we are alive to truth, we are open to the source of Power, which will never let us down.

Today, I will be alive to truth.

*****

Leaving a Positive Footprint
Blessing Space by Madisyn Taylor

We can bless each space we enter leaving a sweet energetic footprint behind.

Physical space acts like a sponge, absorbing the radiant of all who pass through it. And, more likely than not, the spaces we move through each day have seen many people come and go. We have no way of knowing whether the energy footprints left behind by those who preceded us will invigorate us or drain us. Yet we can control the energy footprint we leave behind for others. In blessing each space we enter, we orchestrate a subtle energy shift that affects not only our own experiences in that space but also the experiences of the individuals who will enter the space after us. While we may never see the effects our blessing has had, we can take comfort in the fact that we have provided grace for those that follow after us.

When you bless a room or an entire building, you leave a powerful message of love and light for all those who will come after you. Your blessings thus have myriad effects on the environments through which you pass. Old, stagnant energy is cleared, creating a vacuum into which fresh and invigorating energy can freely flow. The space is thus rendered harmonious and nourishing, and it becomes a hub from which positive feelings are transmitted. Intent is the key component of the blessings you leave in your physical wake. If your intent involves using your own consciousness as a tool for selflessly spreading grace, your blessings will never go awry. Whether you feel more comfortable performing a solo blessing or prefer to call upon your spirit guides for assistance, visualize each space you enter becoming free of toxins, chaos, and negativity as you speak your blessing. Then imagine the resultant emptiness being replaced by pure, healing white light and loving energy. Even a quic! k mindful thought of love can bless a space.

This type of blessing is cumulative and will grow each time you bestow it. Try blessing every home, business, and office you visit for an entire week and observing the effects of your goodwill. Your affirmative energy footprint will help brighten your day as you contemplate your blessing’s future impact on your siblings in humanity and your environment. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

We sometimes hear humility defined as the state of being “teachable.” In that sense, most of us in The Program who are able to stay free of active addiction have acquired at least a smattering of humility, or we never would have learned to stay away from the first drink, the first tranquilizer, the first “side bet,” and similar destructive acts for those of us who are powerless over our respective addictions. Do I see increasing humility as a pathway to continuing improvements?

Today I Pray

Now that I have made a start at developing humility, may I keep it up. May I open my self to the will of God and the suggestions of my friends in the group. May I remain teachable, confrontable, receptive and conscious that I must stay that way in order to be healthy.

Today I Will Remember

To remain confrontable.

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One More Day

The future is an opaque mirror. Anyone who tries to look into it sees nothing but the dim outlines of an old and worried face.
– Jim Bishop

Perhaps we spend too much time looking into mirrors and being critical of what we see. There is no stage in life when we are wholly contented with what we see, but as we mature we gradually recognize that our lives are multidimensional. Now we know that there will be periods of time when we are more pensive, more introspective — and times when life will just roll along, with no concern from us.

Acceptance of our appearance gives us the time and energy to work on our inner selves. We look to the future by trying to prepare, and we live in the present by understanding that what we look like is not of important as what we do.

Today, I will decide which changes can give me and others the most joy.

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Food For Thought

Alive To Truth

Being alive to truth requires being in touch with ourselves and with our Higher Power. It requires that we value spiritual truth more than material things. We come to realize that the insights and emotional growth we gain through this program are more valuable than the things we used to think we had to have.
Being alive to truth involves living each present moment. If we are obsessed with the past or preoccupied with the future, we will miss the truth of now. Today we can be who we are and give of our best in whatever situation we find ourselves.

Our Higher Power promises that if we ask for truth, we shall we receive it. It will be found when we seek it more than status, or money, or physical comfort. When we are alive to truth, we let open the resource of Power which will never let us down.

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One Day At A Time

HONESTY
"Whatever games are played with us,
we must play no games with ourselves,
but deal in our privacy with the last honesty and truth."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

When I began to study step one in OA I learned that the principle behind the step was honesty. That was difficult for me because I had spent so much time lying to myself and others about my eating. I was so ashamed of my eating habits and behaviors that when asked about them, it never occurred to me to tell the truth. I couldn't conceive of being accepted, or even cared for, if anyone knew the truth.

Then I came into the program and began to hear people share. The denial and shell of lies began to melt. For the first time I found myself in a fellowship where I felt like I could tell the truth because I was surrounded by people whose stories were similar to mine. Most importantly, the people in the fellowship loved me and cared for me when I told my truth, no matter how ugly it seemed to me. I call this the magic of the fellowship. It makes me want to be that kind of loving, caring person for the newcomer taking his or her first step.

One day at a time...
I will honestly confront the reality of my compulsive eating, knowing that I am in a fellowship where I am unconditionally loved and cared for.
~ Carolyn H.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that is it fatal. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die. - Pg. 66 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

To insist stubbornly on holding to old relationships, when they are basically drug oriented relationships is sabotaging our recovery process. Is it not our disease finding a 'good' excuse to keep us close to drugs?

May I be able to hear the suggestions of those who work with me. May I listen in this next hour and follow the suggestions.

Learning from Life

There are no 'buts' today. I am what I am, others are what they are, life is what it is. I will not parenthesize my growth with a 'but' or hold back my forward-moving spirit with second-guesses. For today, I am living with things as they are. I am exactly where I am meant to be, learning what I need to learn. All I need do is move through situations with willingness to learn and openness to feel. When feelings are brought up, I can accept them as what is happening within me - no need to resist and analyze them. Transformation will happen in the moving through and the acceptance of them. I trust that my life is unfolding in such a way that what I need to learn will be before me. I am willing to learn.

I see the 'table prepared.'
- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

A temper will get us into trouble and pride will keep us there.

I can't save my face and my butt at the same time.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

With the first three steps, you get the courage to work the rest. When you work the rest, you get rid of the garbage so you can work the first three.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know that it does not matter if I cannot see the end of the road. I have absolute faith and trust that I am walking in the right direction and that I am being guided along the way.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Success consists of getting up one more time than you fall. - Anon

[bluidkiti]

November 17

Daily Reflections

OVERCOMING LONELINESS

Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by
loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people
began to cut us off, nearly all of us suffered the
feeling that we didn't quite belong.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 90

The agonies and the void that I often felt inside occur
less and less frequently in my life today. I have
learned to cope with solitude. It is only when I am
alone and calm that I am able to communicate with God,
for He cannot reach me when I am in turmoil. It is good
to maintain contact with God at all times, but it is
absolutely essential that, when everything seems to go
wrong, I maintain that contact through prayer and
meditation.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Everyone has two personalities, a good and a bad. We
are all dual personalities to some extent. When we were
drinking, the bad personality was in control. We did
things when we were drunk that we would never do when
we were sober. When we sober up, we are different people.
Then we wonder how we could have done the things we did.
But we drink again, and again our bad side comes out.
So we are back and forth, always in conflict with our
other selves, always in a stew. This division of our
selves is not good; we must somehow become unified. We
do this by giving ourselves wholeheartedly to A.A. and
to sobriety. Have I become unified?

Meditation For The Day

"Well done, thou good and faithful servant. Enter into
the joy of Thy Lord." These words are for many ordinary
people whom the world may pass by, unrecognizing. Not
to the world-famed, the proud, the wealthy, are these
words spoken, but to the quiet followers who serve God
unobtrusively yet faithfully, who bear their crosses
bravely and put a smiling face to the world. "Enter into
the joy of Thy Lord." Pass into that fuller spiritual
life, which is a life of joy and peace.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may not desire the world's applause.
I pray that I may not seek rewards for doing what I
believe is right.

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As Bill Sees It

Two Authorities, p. 319

Many people wonder how A.A. can function under a seeming anarchy.
Other societies have to have law and force and sanction and
punishment, administered by authorized people. Happily for us, we
found that we need no human authority whatever. We have two
authorities which are far more effective. One is benign, the other
malign.

There is God, our Father, who very simply says, "I am waiting for you
to do my will." The other authority is named John Barleycorn, and he
says, "You had better do God's will or I will kill you."

<< << << >> >> >>

The A.A. Traditions are neither rules, regulations, nor laws. We obey
them willingly because we ought to and because we want to. Perhaps
the secret of their power lies in the fact that these life-giving
communications spring out of living experience and are rooted in love.

1. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 105
2. A.A. Today, p. 11

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Walk In Dry Places

Are we doing well enough?
Success
Sometimes we can get off the track by mixing AA with the world's ideas of success.
In AA, success means staying sober while using the AA principles in our daily affairs. We can be successful people in all walks of life.
We should never think that a person is unsuccessful merely because he or she holds a low-paying job or has not regained any business or professional stature that has been lost. One of our members, for example, had once been the senior member of a lucrative law partnership before drinking himself into the gutter. In his sober years, he found great satisfaction in a relatively low- paying judgeship. In worldly terms, he could be seen as less successful. In AA terms, however, this period was the truly successful part of his life.
Our Higher Power will show us where our place in life should be. That should be success enough for any of us.
I'll do my best today in whatever job I have, grateful for the sobriety that helps me stay self-supporting and happy.

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Keep It Simple

Mishaps are like knives that either serve us or cut us, as we grasp them by the blade or the handle.
---Herman Melville
We have hung on in hard times. We made it through our addiction. Some of us have lived through abuse. We’ve felt like our hearts were broken. But we’ve proven we are survivors. Now we’re learning that we can heal.
Being recovery doesn’t mean things will be easy. But we have a Higher Power to help us. We have friends who listen to us, care for us, and help us through the pain. Because of our recovery program, we’re able to keep hope and love in our lives---One Day at a Time.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me through the hard times. Help me trust in Your love and care.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll plan ahead with my sponsor. What will I do now so that I’ll have strong support when hard times come?

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Each Day a New Beginning

I think happiness is like the effect on an audience (when acting), if you think of it all the time you will not get it, you must get lost in the part, lost in your purposes and let the effect be the criterion of your success. --Joanna Field
Happiness is a gift that accompanies every instance of our lives if we approach each situation with gratitude, knowing that what's offered to us is special to our particular needs. The experiences we meet day to day are honing our Spirit, tempering our hard edges. For these we should offer gratitude.
Our well-being is the gift. Deciding what will make us happy, in fact, what we must have to be happy, prevents us from grasping the unexpected pleasure of the "chance" events of the moment. When we intently look for what we think we need, we may well be blind to more beneficial opportunities God has chosen for us.
Our self-centeredness hinders every breath we take. It prejudices every encounter. It stifles our creative potential. And most of all, it blocks any chance for a spontaneous reaction to the moment. Spontaneity is the breeding ground for creative living. And happiness is the byproduct.
Happiness is my decision, every moment.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

If you have a number three husband, you may be in luck. Being certain he wants to stop, you can go to him with this volume as joyfully as though you had struck oil. He may not share your enthusiasm, but he is practically sure to read the book and he may go for the program at once. If he does not, you will probably not have long to wait. Again, you should not crowd him. Let him decide for himself. Cheerfully see him through more sprees. Talk about his condition or this book only when he raises the issue. In some cases it may be better to let someone outside the family urge action without arousing hostility. If your husband is otherwise a normal individual, your chances are good at this stage.

p. 113

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

My dad and I decided to go to a Native American gathering. I hadn't been to one of the pow wows since I was a child. When we heard the drums and watched the dancers, I felt some great passion well up inside of me. I felt like an outsider. I wanted a drink. I wore my hair down and wore a lot of turquoise jewelry I had collected over the years. I looked like the people, but I certainly didn't feel like one of them. I felt as if they all knew something I didn't.

p. 463

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

So when A.A. suggests a fearless moral inventory, it must seem to every newcomer that more is being asked of him than he can do. Both his pride and his fear beat him back every time he tries to look within himself. Pride says, "You need not pass this way," and Fear says, "You dare not look!" But the testimony of A.A.'s who have really tried a moral inventory is that pride and fear of this sort turn out to be bogeymen, nothing else. Once we have a complete willingness to take inventory, and exert ourselves to do the job thoroughly, a wonderful light falls upon this foggy scene. As we persist, a brand-new kind of confidence is born, and the sense of relief at finally facing ourselves is indescribable. These are the first fruits of Step Four.

pp. 49-50

************************************************** *********

I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked
with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a
grand thing.
--Agatha Christie

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our
thanksgiving.
--W.T. Purkiser

The source of love is deep in us, and we can help others realize a lot of happiness. One
word, one action, one thought can reduce another person's suffering and bring that person
joy.
--Thich Nhat Hanh

Never let the word "impossible" stop you from pursuing what your heart and spirit urge
you to do. Impossible things come true every day.
--Robert K. Cooper

Nothing is impossible to the willing heart.
--Thomas Heywood

H O P E = Happy Our Program Exists.

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

EXPERIENCE

"Experience is not what happens
to a man. It is what a man does
with what happens to him."
-- Aldous Huxley

Today I experience the joy of sobriety. Today I experience God in my world. Today I
experience the peace and serenity that for years eluded me.

Experience is the key. It locates all that is in my life. Experience allows me to
appreciate what living is all about.

Love is to be felt. Forgiveness is to be experienced. Humility is to be lived in action.
Hope is to be recognized in the brightness of the eye.

Life is to be experienced. That is spirituality.

May the God that I experience be reflected in daily life.

************************************************** *********

"God will wipe away every tear from their eyes."
Revelation 7:17

"I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry."
Psalm 40:1

Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee: because he trusteth
in Thee.
Isaiah 26:3

But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving,
considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.
James 3:17

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

You will not create a new life by simply forgetting the old one. Lord, help me create new values and new goals so that I will become a peaceful spirit which will bring newness and freshness to my life and allow me to greet the day with enthusiasm.

Never underestimate the power of your presence nor your ability to comfort and encourage. Lord, thank You for my opportunities to do Your work.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Walking Through The Pain

"We never have to use again, no matter how we feel. All feelings will eventually pass."
Basic Text p. 79

It hurts like never before. You get out of bed after a sleepless night, talk to God, and still don't feel any better. "It will pass;" a little voice tells you. "When?" you wonder, as you pace and mutter and get on with your day.

You sob in your car and turn the radio all the way up so you can't hear your own thoughts. But you go straight to work, and don't even think about using drugs.

Your insides feel as though they've been torched. Just when the pain becomes unbearable, you go numb and silent. You go to a meeting and wish you were as happy as other members seem to be. But you don't relapse.

You cry some more and call your sponsor. You drive to a friend's house and don't even notice the beautiful scenery because your inner landscape is so bleak. You may not feel any better after visiting your friend-but at least you didn't visit the connection instead.

You listen to a Fifth Step. You share at a meeting. You look at the calendar and realize you've gotten through another day clean.

Then one day you wake up, look outside, and realize it's a beautiful day. The sun is shining. The sky is blue. You take a deep breath, smile again, and know that it really does pass.

Just for today: No matter how I feel today, I'll go on with my recovery.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Down in a green and shady bed
A modest violet grew;
Its stalk was bent, it hung its head,
As if to hide from view.
--Jane Taylor
Shyness can be painful. Those of us who are shy do not choose to be this way. There are no quick and easy solutions to shyness, but it isn't the worst thing that could happen to us. And there are some things we can do about it. We can be willing to talk about it with someone we trust. We can exercise to build strength and self-confidence, and we can avoid dwelling on the problem. Most of all, we should not let shyness keep us from doing things. We may be a little uncomfortable, but that doesn't have to stop us from doing the task at hand to the best of our ability.
We can be assured that the ability to succeed is within us, and keep in mind that, if we offer love to those around us, their answering love will help us overcome our shyness.
What am I no longer too shy to try today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
You cannot devalue the body and value the soul - or value anything else. The isolation of the body sets it into direct conflict with everything else in creation. --Wendell Berry
Our bodies are part of creation as much as trees, lakes, mountains, flowers, and animals. Part of our growth into full manhood is treating ourselves respectfully. It is a spiritual practice to be fully accepting, active, and alive physically.
We can no longer be content to be only spectator sportsmen in front of the television set. We need to get our own muscles moving. What we take in as food expresses the level of respect we feel for ourselves. Our sexual expressions reflect the value we feel for our own bodies and our partners'. Our spiritual feelings become part of all the basic details of our lives.
Today, I stand in God's creation as a physical body. My spiritual experience includes all the ways I care for and accept my body.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
I think happiness is like the effect on an audience (when acting), if you think of it all the time you will not get it, you must get lost in the part, lost in your purposes and let the effect be the criterion of your success. --Joanna Field
Happiness is a gift that accompanies every instance of our lives if we approach each situation with gratitude, knowing that what's offered to us is special to our particular needs. The experiences we meet day to day are honing our Spirit, tempering our hard edges. For these we should offer gratitude.
Our well-being is the gift. Deciding what will make us happy, in fact, what we must have to be happy, prevents us from grasping the unexpected pleasure of the "chance" events of the moment. When we intently look for what we think we need, we may well be blind to more beneficial opportunities God has chosen for us.
Our self-centeredness hinders every breath we take. It prejudices every encounter. It stifles our creative potential. And most of all, it blocks any chance for a spontaneous reaction to the moment. Spontaneity is the breeding ground for creative living. And happiness is the byproduct.
Happiness is my decision, every moment.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Grief and Action
Trust in God and do something. --Mary Lyon
It's important to let ourselves grieve as a passage between yesterday and tomorrow. But we do not have to be controlled unduly by our grief, or our pain.
There are times when we have grieved, surrendered to the heaviness, tiredness, and weariness of a circumstance long enough. It becomes time to break out. It comes time to take action.
We will know when it's time to break the routine of grieving. There will be signs within and around us. We will become tired of the heaviness. An idea will occur; an opportunity will present itself. We may think: No. Too much effort... Do it anyway. Try something. Reach out. Stretch. Do something unusual, something different, and something special.
A new activity may help trigger the transformation process. Stay up two hours later than usual! Make an appointment to do something for yourself that is different from what you usually do. Visit someone you haven't seen in years. Do something to encourage and help the new energy coming your way.
We may not feel like breaking out of grief. It may feel safer, easier, to remain in our cocoon. Begin pushing out anyway.
Test the walls of your cocoon. Push. Push a little harder. It may be time to emerge.
Today, I will trust God and the process, but I will also take action to help myself feel better.


Today I am doing the best that I can with the guidance that I get. I leave the results to my Higher Power and trust that they are for the greatest good. --Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

Discover the Power of Loving Yourself

Sometimes it’s hard to trust life with all its sudden twists, turns, and storms. When something unexpected or painful happens, when we become blocked or frustrated, when life takes a different course than we hoped it would, it’s easy to stop trusting the flow of our lives. I didn’t ask for this. It’s not fair. I don’t want this, we think. This road isn’t leading anywhere, at least nowhere I want to go. Often, when we feel life has turned on us, we respond by turning on ourselves. But turning on ourselves doesn’t help. In fact, it can compound the situation. It can prevent us from hearing and acting on the very guidance that will lead us through, get us through, and take us to the next place. It can prevent us from hearing our heart.

Keep loving yourself, and taking care of yourself, no matter what– through the storms,the twists, the turns, and the blocks. Take a moment, breathe deep, restore yourself to that sacred place of self-love and self-responsibility. Feel all your feelings. Then let them go. Love yourself until you can hear your heart and what it tells you to do. Love yourself until you find the courage to act on that guidance.

Loving yourself is a powerful tool, a powerful force for change. It can reconnect you to creativity, to universal love, to the best possible flow of events within your life. It can and will reconnect you to life’s magic.

There is a trustworthy road through whatever life brings. Loving yourself will help you find it.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Undo your mistakes

“Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.” This is the Tenth Step of the Alcoholics Anonymous Twelve Step program. It’s also a step that many wise people not working a program practice,too.

Sometimes the mistakes we make are teeny, tiny ones. We say something that hurts another person. Or we behave in a way we know is inappropriate, and we feel badly about it. Sometimes the mistakes are bigger. We may have taken a job or gotten ourselves into a relationship thinking it was a good idea only to discover later that it wasn’t.

For whatever the reasons motivating us at the time, we made a mistake. We took a wrong turn on the path, and the direction we’re going isn’t where we meant to go and isn’t where we want to be. Or we’ve arrived at a dead end.

Step Ten is part of the program, one-twelfth of the program, because someone knew we were going to need it, maybe one-twelfth of the time. The words I’m sorry are in our language because we’ve developed a need for that phrase,too.

Not making amends can damage our relationships. When pride or shame prevent us from making amends, we close our hearts to God, ourselves, and the people we love.

Admit your mistake. Take any actions necessary to correct the situation for yourself and the people involved.

Just open your heart and say these five words: I’m sorry. I was wrong.

Then let it go and get one with your life. Have the courage to do what you need to do to get on track with your life.

God, help me admit to myself, you, and others when I’m wrong and have made a mistake– whether it’s a small one or a major wrong turn in my life. Then, help me to undo my actions and get back on track again.

*****

Decorating Life
The World as Home

There are few things more thrilling than having a new house or an empty room to decorate. Our imaginations soar as we consider the many possibilities. In the same way, our lives offer us the opportunity to express ourselves within various contexts, to ask ourselves questions about what we want to see as we move through our days and how we want things to flow. Some people do this instinctively, moving through the various environments they inhabit and shifting the energy with their presence. These people have a knack for decorating life. This can be as simple as the way they dress, the way they speak, or the fact that they always bring a bouquet of wildflowers when they come for a visit.

As we move through the world, we make a statement, whether we intend to or not. We shift the energy one way when we enter a room dressed elegantly and simply, and another when we show up in bright, cheerful colors and a floppy hat. One is not better than the other. It is simply a question of the mood we wish to create. What we wear is just one choice we can focus on. The way we speak to people, or touch them, shifts the energy more profoundly than almost anything else. The words we speak and the tone in which we say them are the music we choose to play in the world that is our home. Some of us fill the space with passionate arias, others with healing hymns. Again, one is not better than the other. We are all called to contribute.

Just as we consciously create an environment within our homes, we can consciously choose to decorate life itself with our particular energy. Ideally, in doing so, we express our deeper selves, so that the adornments we add to the world make it more meaningful, more beautiful, and as welcoming as a beloved home. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Many of us in The Program stubbornly cling to false ideas and positions simply because we fear we’d be left defenseless if we admitted having been wrong. The thought of “backing down” still seems distasteful to some of us. But we come to learn that our self-esteem soars when we’re able to push pride into the background and truly face the facts. Chances are that people with true humility have more genuine self-esteem than those of us who are repeatedly victimized by pride. Does pride deviously keep me from thorough and continuing attention to the Tenth Step?

Today I Pray

May pride stay out of my way, now that I’ve found a road to follow. May I avoid that familiar, destructive cycle of pride — the ego that balloons up out of all proportion and then deflates with a fizzle. May I learn the value of “backing down.”

Today I Will Remember

Pride is the arch-enemy of self-esteem.

*************************************

One More Day

The People plan and God laughs.
–Yiddish Proverb

Through the ages our ancestors have recognized that sometimes what happens is due to a purely random selection. Natural disasters occur, accidents happen, and people are in the wrong places at the wrong times.

But what about being in the right place at the right time? It’s not very often that we hear those stories. We hear about trade dies and real triumphs. What we don’t hear are stories about people like us, who struggle along, doing the best they can, hoping for a break. We have learned there are times to let go of unrealistic plans and to let our Higher Power have a hand in our lives. By letting go we create our own well-being.

I make my plans and hope for success, knowing there is a Power greater than me who has the final word.

************************************

Food For Thought

Escape into Sleep

After we stop eating compulsively, we may be tempted to use sleep as a form of escape. Though not as detrimental as excess food, too much sleep can also make us lethargic and dull. The danger lies in allowing ourselves to escape the realities of living, rather than coping with them.

We all need adequate rest in order to feel good and function efficiently. Sleep becomes an escape, however, if we take long daytime naps instead of finding worthwhile and enjoyable activities. Just as we may have overeaten because of boredom, we may oversleep because we have nothing better to do.

Our Higher Power has a plan for the time and talents He gives us. It is our job to discover how and where we can best serve God and each other. With the new life we are given in OA goes the responsibility to use it productively. Since this is the only life we have, we do not choose to sleep it away. By facing our problems with the help of this program, we learn how to deal with them.

Deliver me from indolence.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Aging ~
Those who love deeply never grow old;
they may die of old age, but they die young.
Benjamin Franklin

I used to be afraid of getting older. I was also afraid to become friends with older people, because I would come to love them and then they would die. I could not handle unpleasant feelings (other than if I overate to stop feeling them) because the feeling of unpleasantness would totally devastate me.

In working the Twelve Step program, my Higher Power has brought me great recovery in this area ... I am now able to handle the grief and sorrow that come up when I allow myself to get to know and love older people and then they die. I am now free in this area! I get to enjoy the wisdom and beauty that they have to share, from all their life experiences, and from the beautiful people they are!

Another beautiful gift from my Higher Power came when I started relating to older people again. When the first one died, it really threw me, and I was very sad. But I got up the next day and had a great spiritual awakening: this person was missing and that was sad, but I looked around and saw all the other wonderful people still there in my life, with whom I got to share another day! Life suddenly became much more precious to me ... to have one more day to be with and share with someone who touches my soul!

One Day at a Time . . .
I enjoy myself as I become older. I allow myself to enjoy friendships with those who are older than me. I thank my Higher Power for every day and every moment of precious life!
~ Lynne ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

The terms 'spiritual experience' and 'spiritual awakening' are used many times in this book which, upon careful reading, shows that the personality change sufficient to bring about recovery from alcoholism has manifested itself among us in many different forms. - Pg. 567 - 4th. Edition - Appendices II - Spiritual Experience

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun!

Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to.

A Return to Living

Today, I keep my house clean and let go of the rest - some of the ways that I wish to live as a recovered person will not be readily understood by others. I will keep my own scorecard clean and not worry about the results. I will act in a way that makes it easier for me to live with myself - that keeps my own conscience clear. Other people's negative projections of me no longer run me. I am the one who makes the decisions about who I want to be. I need not defend and explain myself again and again. I need not ask permission to be who I am. I allow myself to be happy in my own skin today. I think well of myself, no matter what others think of me.

I create my own self.
- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

The people you most need to give love to will seem like the ones who deserve it the least.

It begins with me.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Going to any lengths are our strengths.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am doing the best that I can with the guidance that I get. I leave the results to my Higher Power and trust that they are for the greatest good.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

It's not just the 'yets' I worry about if I pick up a drink - it's also the 'agains'. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

November 18

Daily Reflections

A SAFETY NET

Occasionally. . . We are seized with a rebellion so sickening that we
simply won't pray. When these things happen we should not think too
ill of ourselves. We should simply resume prayer as soon as we can,
doing what we know to be good for us.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 105

Sometimes I scream, stomp my feet, and turn my back on my Higher
Power. Then my disease tells me that I am a failure, and that if I stay
angry I'll surely get drunk. In those moments of self-will it's as if I've
slipped over a cliff and am hanging by one hand. The above passage
is my safety net, in that it urges me to try some new behavior, such as
being kind and patient with myself. It assures me that my Higher
Power will wait until I am willing once again to risk letting go, to land
in the net, and to pray.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I have got over my procrastination. I was always putting
things off till tomorrow and as a result that never got
done. "There is always another day" was my motto instead
of "Do it now." Under the influence of alcohol, I had
grandiose plans. When I was sober I was too busy getting
over my drunk to start anything. "Some day I'll do that"
-- but I never did it. In A.A. I have learned it's better
to make a mistake once in a while than to never do
anything at all. We learn by trial and error. But we must
act now and not put it off until tomorrow. Have I learned
to do it now?

Meditation For The Day

"Do not hide your light under a bushel. Arise and shine,
for the light has come and the glory of the Lord has risen
in thee." The glory of the Lord shines in the beauty of a
man's character. It is risen in you, even though you can
realize it only in part. "Now you see as in a glass darkly,
but later you will see face to face." The glory of the Lord
is too dazzling for mortals to see fully on earth. But some
of this glory is risen in you when you try to reflect that
light in your life.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may try to be a reflection of the Divine Light.
I pray that some of its rays may shine in my life.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Running The Whole Show, p. 320

Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor
who wants to run the whole show and is forever trying to arrange the
lights, the scenery, and the rest of the players in his own way. If his
arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he
wished, the show would be great.

What usually happens? The show doesn't come off very well.
Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people
are more to blame. He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying.

Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be useful? Is he not
a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness
out of this world if he only manages well?

Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 60-61

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

The old friends who dropped us.
Personal relations.
As our drinking progressed, most of us lost old friends. Sometimes it was our behavior that drove them away; at other times, it was because they didn't want to associate with "losers."
In sobriety, some of our old friendships have been restored. These are real friendships based on trust and true affection.
But sobriety can also give us a deeper and finer understanding of friendships. We may acquire a new set of values on this subject. We may find that some of those whom we considered friends were only fair-weather drinking acquaintances.
Drinking acquaintances will probably ease away from us if we really means business in staying sober. This need not bother us if we're thinking rightly.
The great news in all of this is that in the fellowship, we'll be making some of the best friends we can ever have. We'll also learn how to be great friends with ourselves.
In my thinking about friendship today, I'll seek people I trust and like, not people I can use.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Life is short: live it up. Nikita
We won't stay sober long unless it's more fun than using chemicals.
The truth is, using chemicals wasn't fun anymore. It was work. We just
told ourselves it was still fun.
So live it up! Try new things. Meet new friends. Try new foods. Taking
risks and having adventures are a basic human need. So go for it.
Sobriety is fun. Living a spiritual life is fun. Get out there and live!
Prayer for the day: Higher Power ,teach me to play. Teach me to have fun. Teach me to live!
Action for the day: Today is for fun. I'll try something new. I'll see how many people
I can get to smile. And I'll celebrate the fact that I'm sober.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Do not compare yourself with others, for you are a unique and wonderful creation. Make your own beautiful footprints in the snow. --Barbara Kimball
Comparisons we make of ourselves to other women do destruction far greater than our conscious minds are aware of. Positioning ourselves or her on the "beloved pedestal" prevents the equality of sisterhood that offers each woman the freedom to be solely herself.
Comparisons in which we are the losers darken the moment, cut us off from the actual rhythms of that moment. The consequences can be grave. Within any moment might be the opportunity we've awaited, the opportunity to achieve a particular dream. We must not miss our opportunities.
Each life is symbolized by a particular set of footprints in the snow. How wonderful and how freeing to know that we each offer something uniquely our own. We need never compete to be noticed. Each of us is guaranteed recognition for what we contribute, because it is offered by us alone.
Envy eats at us; it interferes with all of our interactions. It possesses all of our thoughts, caging us, denying us the freedom to achieve that can be ours.
I will look with love on my sisters. I will free them and myself to be all we are capable of becoming.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

You would suppose that men in the fourth classification would be quite hopeless, but that is not so. Many of Alcoholics Anonymous were like that. Everybody had given them up. Defeat seemed certain. Yet often such men had spectacular and powerful recoveries.

p. 113

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

In an effort to prove I was getting better, I started hitting the streets again in order to make more money. I told my parents that I was going down the mountain to visit friends. I received my third arrest for drunk driving on one of the trips back, after working all weekend. The night in jail seemed a long time to go without a drink.

pp. 463-464

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

By now the newcomer has probably arrived at the following conclusions: that his character defects, representing instincts gone astray, have been the primary cause of his drinking and his failure at life; that unless he is now willing to work hard at the elimination of the worst of these defects, both sobriety and peace of mind will still elude him; that all the faulty foundation of his life will have to be torn out and built anew on bedrock. Now willing to commence the search for his own defects, he will ask, "Just how do I go about this? How do I take inventory of myself?"

p. 50

************************************************** *********

"What makes humility so desirable is the marvelous thing it does to us; it creates in
us a capacity for the closest possible intimacy with God."
--Monica Baldwin

What you are is God's gift to you,
What you do with yourself is your gift to God.
--White Buffalo Calf Woman

Remember that your children are not your own, but are lent to you by the Creator.
--Native American Proverb

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
--Carl Sandburg

Honesty is the best way to gain the trust of others. By being honest,
feelings may or may not be hurt. Whichever the case you will end up
respecting yourself more for it.
--unknown

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

STRENGTH

"All cruelty springs from weakness."
-- Seneca

My spiritual recovery means that I confront my disease and remember sick attitudes
and behavior patterns. I would rather not talk about my disease because it is
embarrassing and shameful particularly my cruelty to people and animals. My
alcoholism made me lash out at the weak; yes, my weakness inflicted pain and
cruelty on others.

I remember this only to rejoice in today's strength that allows vulnerability. My past
weaknesses made me act strong. Today my strength allows me to be weak.

God, the recognition of my past cruelties enables me to forgive and
understand others.

************************************************** *********

Set a guard over my mouth ,O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.
Psalm 141:3

"You heavens above, rain down righteousness; let the clouds shower it down. Let the
earth open wide, let salvation spring up, let righteousness grow with it; I, the LORD, have
created it.
Isaiah 45:8

No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful,
who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will
provide the way of escape also, that you may be able to endure it.
1 Corinthians 10:13

Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.
Proverbs 19:18

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Daily Inspiration

Your life is yours to live as you choose with the results that you want. Lord, help me to be full of life, full of energy and greet my opportunities with a peaceful smile and a gentle gratitude.

Faith grows by speaking daily with God. Lord, You teach me Your promises when times are good so that I will be able to trust in You when times are hard.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Self-discovery

"The Tenth Step can help us correct our living problems and prevent their recurrence."
Basic Text p. 41

Our identities, how we think and feel, have been shaped by our experiences. Some of our experiences have made us better people; others have caused us shame or embarrassment; all of them have influenced who we are today. We can take advantage of the knowledge gained in examining our mistakes, using this wisdom to guide the decisions we'll make today.

Acceptance of ourselves means accepting all aspects of ourselves - our assets, our defects, our successes, and our failures. Shame and guilt left unaddressed can paralyze us, preventing us from moving forward in our lives. Some of the most meaningful amends we can make for the mistakes of our past are made simply by acting differently today. We strive for improvement and measure our success by comparing who we used to be with who we are now.

Being human, we will continue making mistakes; however, we need not make the same ones over and over again. By looking over our past and realizing that we have changed and grown, we'll find hope for the future. The best is yet to come.

Just for today: I will do the best I can with what I have today. Each day I'll learn something new that will help me tomorrow.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
One comes in the end to realize that there is no permanent pure relationship and there should not be. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Whether we are teenagers in love for the first time, or parents who have been married for twenty years, relationships can turn into obsessions if we're not careful.
We can lose our sense of self and only feel complete when we're with the other person. We can become totally attached and dependent on the primary person in our lives for all our needs.
We need to remember that we can be a good partner in a relationship only if we feel complete within ourselves. Keeping ourselves open to change in our surroundings, our loved ones, and especially ourselves helps us stay whole.
We learn, first, to be ourselves, to make independent choices. We dare to do things on our own. Things as simple as going for a walk by ourselves and smelling the scents of nature. Being ourselves means bringing our own world to meet the world of our loved ones, rather than depending on them to make our world.
Am I making my own happiness so I may share it with others?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I always entertain great hopes. --Robert Frost
In our honest journey, we must admit life is often difficult and painful.
But these facts do not describe all of life, and they do not determine how we respond. The sun rises warm and bright after a cold and dark night. The open, generous smile of a small child reaches into the soft part of us all. To be strong and hardy men on this spiritual path, we must be truthful about the pain and unfairness in life while holding firmly to a belief in all the generous possibilities.
Surrendering to despair, we trade the uncertainty of options for the certainty of gloom. Then we might say, "At least I'm never disappointed this way." Life isn't filled only with difficulty and pain. It is also filled with people whose dignity and spirit rise above their circumstances. There are situations when great sacrifice or love and wisdom turn a problem into an opportunity and strength. If we look at what has happened in our own lives and in those of others, we have ample reason to hope.
My own experience in recovery gives me great hope in what can be.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Do not compare yourself with others, for you are a unique and wonderful creation. Make your own beautiful footprints in the snow. --Barbara Kimball
Comparisons we make of ourselves to other women do destruction far greater than our conscious minds are aware of. Positioning ourselves or her on the "beloved pedestal" prevents the equality of sisterhood that offers each woman the freedom to be solely herself.
Comparisons in which we are the losers darken the moment, cut us off from the actual rhythms of that moment. The consequences can be grave. Within any moment might be the opportunity we've awaited, the opportunity to achieve a particular dream. We must not miss our opportunities.
Each life is symbolized by a particular set of footprints in the snow. How wonderful and how freeing to know that we each offer something uniquely our own. We need never compete to be noticed. Each of us is guaranteed recognition for what we contribute, because it is offered by us alone.
Envy eats at us; it interferes with all of our interactions. It possesses all of our thoughts, caging us, denying us the freedom to achieve that can be ours.
I will look with love on my sisters. I will free them and myself to be all we are capable of becoming.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Allowing Ourselves to be Nurtured
Let yourself be nurtured and loved. Let people be there for you. Allow yourself to be held when it would feel good. Let someone listen to you, support and encourage you when you need that. Receive comfort from someone's physical presence when you need that. Allow yourself to be supported emotionally and cared about.
For too long, we've stood in the background, attending to the needs of others and claiming we have no needs of our own. We've shut off, for to long, the part of us that longs to be nurtured.
It is time, now, to claim those needs, to identify them, and to understand that we deserve to have them met.
What are our needs? What would feel good? What kinds of ways would we like others to nurture and support us? The clearer we can be about our needs, the greater the possibility they will be met.
Hugs. A listening ear. Support. Encouragement. The physical and emotional presence of people who care about us. Doesn't that sound good? Tempting?
Someone once said to me, "The eighties have been a 'me' decade. Now, maybe the nineties can be a 'you' decade."
My reply was immediate. "Let's make the nineties a 'me' and 'you' decade."
No matter how long we've been recovering, we never outgrow our need for nurturing and love.
Today, I will open to recognizing my needs for nurturing. I will be open to the needs of those around me too. I can begin taking a nurturing, loving attitude toward myself and by taking responsibility for my needs in relationships.


Today I can handle whatever comes up, knowing that I am surrounded by all the positive energies of the universe. --Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

Live with Unsolved Problems

Sometimes we need to live for a while with a particular behavior, problem, or situation before we’re ready to change it.

Sometimes we have to live with it so long– conscious that it’s a problem but unable yet to solve or change it– that we can hardly bear it. We’re fully aware that we want and need something different, but the situation still hasn’t changed. The answer has not yet arrived. We worry that the situation will continue eternally and the problem will never be solved. During those times of living with a problem and the desire to solve it, we may long for the old days, those days when our denial system was intact and we didn’t know what we were doing.

If you can’t solve it yet, if you can’t change it yet, it’s okay to live with it, just as it is. Something is happening. The situation is changing. You’re on your way to change.

Trust that the waiting part of change is necessary. Trust that your desire for change is the beginning of change. Trust that each moment you are moving closer to the change you desire.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Improvise

Do not fear mistakes; there are none.
–Miles Davis

Life is a jazz tune. Sometimes it’s raucous, sometimes blue, but always full of unexpected twists and turns, and here and there a delightful new sound emerges. Viewed from a staunch classical viewpoint we might be tempted to call the new note or harmonization a mistake, but in the free flowing world of jazz, it becomes just another piece of the melodic whole.

So we took the wrong job, chose a career based on what others expected of you rather that what you expected of yourself. Was it a mistake? Only if you spent all your time there dwelling on the fact that you would rather be someplace else and missed the chance to learn something about yourself.

Admit your mistakes. Say sorry when you’re wrong.

But don’t feel trapped by the mistakes of your past and don’t trap yourself now by the possibility of future mistakes. Sure, we’ll continue to screw up. But, we just might invent a new note or two along the way.

*****

Staying Afloat Amidst the Spin
Taking Things Personally

Every time you interact with others, you have the choice to listen to, acknowledge, and let go of their words, or you can take what they are saying personally. Taking things personally is often the result of perceiving a person’s actions or words as an affront or slight. In order to take something personally, you must read negative intent in an individual’s words or actions. But what people do and say has no bearing upon you and is usually based on their own experiences, emotions, and perceptions. If you attempt to take what they do or say personally, you may end up feeling hurt without reason.

If you are tempted to take a comment or action personally, creating some distance between yourself and the other person can help you. Try to determine what is at the root of your feelings. Ask yourself if the other person’s words or actions are just reinforcing some insecurity within you or if you can really be sure that an offense was intended. You may even want to ask them what they meant. Finally, put yourself in the other person’s shoes. Instead of taking their words as the truth, or as a personal affront, remember that whatever was said or done is based on their opinion and is more reflective of what is going on inside of them, rather than having anything to do with you. You may have been an easy target for someone having a bad day, and their comments may have been offered with no ill intentions.

When you recognize that what anyone says or does doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with you, you will no longer feel hurt or attacked. While it’s easy to take things personally, you should never let anyone’s perceptions or actions affect how you see yourself or your worth. Your life is personal to you, and it is up to you to influence your own value and sense of well-being. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“Nothing is enough to the man for whom enough is too little,” wrote the Greek philosopher Epicurus. Now that we’re free from addiction, rebuilding our self-respect and winning back the esteem of family and friends, we have to avoid becoming smug about our new-found success. For most of us, success has always been a heady brew; even in our new life, it’s still possible to fall into the dangerous trap of “big-shot-itis.” As insurance, we ought to remember that we’re free today only by the grace of God. Will I remember that any success i may be having is far more His success than mine?

Today I Pray

May I keep constant string-on-the-finger reminder that I have found freedom through the grace of God — just so I don’t let my pride try to convince me I did it all myself. May I learn to cope with success by ascribing it to a Higher Power, not to my own questionable superiority.

Today I Will Remember

Learn to deal with success.

*************************************

One More Day

Life is not a static thing.
– Everet M. Dirkson

Sometimes change occurs so slowly within us that we don’t notice it. We accept it and may even welcome it when it happens gradually, but we’re less likely to accept those changes that arrive suddenly. Abrupt change doesn’t fit what we expect and can cause chaos in our lives.

When we finally realize we can’t prevent changes from happening, but can only alter our reactions to these changes, they become easier to accept. We can’t stop our declining health either, but we can certainly understand the influence a positive attitude can have on our lives.

I will accept the things I cannot change.

************************************

Food For Thought

No Exit

We have tried many ways of avoiding problems and pain. In addition to food, we may have used alcohol, drugs, sleep, sex, compulsive activity, or excessive daydreaming to try to escape whatever it was that we did not want to encounter. Undoubtedly, we found that nothing worked permanently; the problem or pain remained.

It is the attempt to avoid discomfort that turned fear into panic. Whatever troubles or threatens us becomes more unmanageable when we pretend that it does not exist. Now that we have the OA program and contact with a Power greater than ourselves, we can confront our problems without searching frantically for an exit from reality.

Our pain is what teaches us the things we need to know. By being willing to be broken, we are able to become whole. Through our distress, we are watched over by the One who heals us. We need no exit.

Thank You for the faith that overcomes panic.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ HONESTY ~
You never find yourself until you face the truth.
Pearl Bailey

I was brought up to be scrupulously honest, or so I thought. I still remember how my father would go back into a shop if he'd been given too much change, a practice that I adopted too. I found it hard to tell a lie, even a white lie, and I would never contemplate cheating on a test. But when it came to food, I only realized later, I was totally dishonest. I was even dishonest when it came to telling people how I felt, or for that matter who I really was. The person who did these things was a totally different person to the upright person I liked people to see.

I know now that all the things I'd hidden around food were obviously what I felt ashamed about. I wanted people to see only the "good" side of me and not the person who did all these devious things in secret. I kept thinking that I was a bad person and the shame stopped me from being totally honest about what I had been doing.

It has taken time, and the love and acceptance I have found in the fellowship, to be able to get totally honest with myself. It has taken time to look at all the things about me that I felt ashamed of. In the housecleaning necessary in the Steps, I have been able to face my shame. I learned that I am human, and that I have a disease. Some of the soul searching has been very painful, but at the same time it has been totally enlightening. I am amazed how I am beginning to know a new me, with faults and all, but a loveable me nevertheless. As I peel off more layers of the onion that represents the sum total of what makes me unique and truly one of God's creatures, I am actually beginning to like the new me. I know now that I am not a bad person trying to get good, merely a sick person trying to get well.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will keep being honest about who I am, what I eat and how I am behaving in my relationships, so I can learn more about me. Even when I don't like what I see, I know I am still a lovable person and a child of God, created in His image.
~ Sharon S. ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote


As we discovered the principles by which the individual alcoholic could live, so we had to evolve principles by which A.A. groups and A.A. as a whole could survive and function effectively. It was thought that no alcoholic man or woman could be excluded from our Society; that our leaders might serve but never govern; that each group was to be autonomous and there was to be no professional class of therapy. - Pg. xix - 4th Edition - Forward To The Second Edition

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Addiction is the great solvent that equalizes all people. We are equal in our addiction and equal in our program of recovery. Although with each passing day of sobriety we get clearer, we are only one fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort away from a binge--at 18 days or 18 years!

May I realize I am no better or worse than another, or them from me. We are equal in our recovery.

Letting Go

Letting go of the past and moving on is a tall order; it requires a kind of releasing that I still find difficult to do. My past will always be in the shadows of my memory to haunt me if I do not recognize it as a part of me. If I pretend it's not important, grit my teeth and force myself to numb myself, I have missed the point of this process. On the other had, if I am unwilling to let go no matter how many times I have worked through certain issues, I am also not allowing myself to be fully healthy and return to life. The part of my healing that is a flowing through the stored pain from the past is a decisive, forward-moving action.

I understand that, as part of my process of healing, my responsibility to let go and move on.
- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Honesty without kindness is cruel and kindness without honesty is co-dependence.

If I can't say it kindly, I needn't say it at all.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

It came to pass; it didn't come to stay.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I can handle whatever comes up, knowing that I am surrounded by all the positive energies of the universe.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

People think that they're going to get sober by osmosis and going to 90 meetings in 90 days. But there's only one way to obtain and maintain sobriety and that's through the program folded within these 164 pages. - Ted H.

[bluidkiti]

November 19

Daily Reflections

"I WAS SLIPPING FAST"

We A.A.'s are active folk, enjoying the satisfactions
of dealing with the realities of life, . . . . So it
isn't surprising that we often tend to slight serious
meditation and prayer as something not really necessary.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 96

I had been slipping away from the program for some time,
but it took a death threat from a terminal disease to
bring me back, and particularly to the practice of the
Eleventh Step of our blessed Fellowship. Although I had
fifteen years of sobriety and was still very active in
the program, I knew that the quality of my sobriety had
slipped badly. Eighteen months later, a checkup revealed
a malignant tumor and a prognosis of certain death
within six months. Despair settled in when I enrolled in
a rehab program, after which I suffered two small strokes
which revealed two large brain tumors. As I kept hitting
new bottoms I had to ask myself why this was happening to
me. God allowed me to recognize my dishonesty and to
become teachable again. Miracles began to happen. But
primarily I relearned the whole meaning of the Eleventh
Step. My physical condition has improved dramatically, but
my illness is minor compared to what I almost lost
completely.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

In A.A. we do not speak much of sex. And yet putting sex
in its proper place in our lives is one of the rewards that
has come to us as a result of our new way of living. The big
book says that many of us needed an overhauling there. It
also says that we subjected each sex relation to this test
-- was it selfish or not? "We remembered always that our sex
powers were God-given and therefore good, neither to be used
lightly or selfishly, nor to be despised or loathed." We can
ask God to mold our ideals and to help us to live up to them.
We can act accordingly. Have I got my sex life under proper
control?

Meditation For The Day

"I will lift up my eyes unto the heights whence cometh my
help." Try to raise your thoughts from the depths of the
sordid and mean and impure things of the earth to the heights
of goodness and decency and beauty. Train your insight by
trying to take the higher view. Train it more and more until
distant heights become more familiar. The heights of the Lord,
whence cometh your help, will become nearer and dearer and
the false values of the earth will seem farther away.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may not keep my eyes forever downcast.
I pray that I may set my sights on higher things.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Results of Prayer, p. 321

As the doubter tries the process of prayer, he should begin to add up
the results. If he persists, he will most surely find more serenity, more
tolerance, less fear, and less anger. He will acquire a quiet courage,
the kind that isn't tension-ridden. He can look at "failure" and
"success" for what these really are. Problems and calamity will begin
to mean his instruction, instead of his destruction. He will feel freer
and saner.

The idea that he may have been hypnotizing himself by autosuggestion
will become laughable. His sense of purpose and of direction will
increase. His anxieties will commence to fade. His physical health will
be likely to improve. Wonderful and unaccountable things will start to
happen. Twisted relations in his family and on the outside will improve
surprisingly.

Grapevine, June 1958

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Is there bondage in attending meetings?
Sharing
A few critics have noted scornfully that AA members can be as enslaved by the need for meetings as we were by the bottle. are we compulsively addicted to meetings.
When we hear such remarks, we must remember that our survival insobriety is always the main issue. We might be going to more meetings that seems necessary , but we are the judges of our own needs.
In addition, meeting attendance is a constructive activity, while drinking was destructive... at least for us. If we're gong to overdo something, at least it's an activity that helps us.
We should never consider meeting attendance a form of bondage. There are many activities in life that are required for our peace and freedom. Meeting attendance is one of these things. We can be grateful for the opportunities meetings provide for sharing our personal experiences. No criticism should be allowed to intrude on this.
I'll not let outside criticism interfere with any AA activity that is benefiting me and maintaining my sobriety.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

What we don't live, we cannot teach others.---Day By Day
Remember - we don't carry the message to others until we get to Step
Twelve. We must first learn to live in a sober way. Sobriety takes time.
We have to stop using alcohol and other drugs, but this is only the start.
Just as it takes time to build a home, it takes time to build a new way of
life. We talk with friends and sponsors about the Steps. We try using them in out lives. Then we talk about how the Steps work for us. We talk about where we get stuck with the Steps.
All this takes time. We aren't in a hurry. We have a lifetime ahead of us.
Remember-the better we live our program, the better we help others.
Prayer for the day: Higher Power, You'll let me know when I'm to carry the message. Until then, be with me as I build a new way of life, a spiritual way of life.
Action for the day: I'll take time to think over where I'm with my program. I'll talk about it with a friend.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Do not compare yourself with others, for you are a unique and wonderful creation. Make your own beautiful footprints in the snow. --Barbara Kimball
Comparisons we make of ourselves to other women do destruction far greater than our conscious minds are aware of. Positioning ourselves or her on the "beloved pedestal" prevents the equality of sisterhood that offers each woman the freedom to be solely herself.
Comparisons in which we are the losers darken the moment, cut us off from the actual rhythms of that moment. The consequences can be grave. Within any moment might be the opportunity we've awaited, the opportunity to achieve a particular dream. We must not miss our opportunities.
Each life is symbolized by a particular set of footprints in the snow. How wonderful and how freeing to know that we each offer something uniquely our own. We need never compete to be noticed. Each of us is guaranteed recognition for what we contribute, because it is offered by us alone.
Envy eats at us; it interferes with all of our interactions. It possesses all of our thoughts, caging us, denying us the freedom to achieve that can be ours.
I will look with love on my sisters. I will free them and myself to be all we are capable of becoming.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

There are exceptions. Some men have been so impaired by alcohol that they cannot stop. Sometimes there are cases where alcoholism is complicated by other disorders. A good doctor or psychiatrist can tell you whether these complications are serious. In any event, try to have your husband read this book. His reaction may be one of enthusiasm. If he is already committed to an institution, but can convince you and your doctor that he means business, give him a chance to try our method, unless the doctor thinks his mental condition too abnormal or dangerous. We make this recommendation with some confidence. For years we have been working with alcoholics committed to institutions. Since this book was first published, A.A. has released thousands of alcoholics from asylums and hospitals of every kind. The majority have never returned. The power of God goes deep!

p. 114

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

Weeks and months passed, and the blackouts continued getting worse. Then I met a man in a local bar. I didn't like him very well, but he had quite a lot of money, and he sure liked me. He took me to nice restaurants and brought me expensive gifts. As long as I had a buzz on, with a few drinks, I could tolerate him.

p. 464

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

Since Step Four is but the beginning of a lifetime practice, it can be suggested that he first have a look at those personal flaws which are acutely troublesome and fairly obvious. Using his best judgment of what has been right and what has been wrong, he might make a rough survey of his conduct with respect to his primary instincts for sex, security, and society. Looking back over his life, he can readily get under way by consideration of questions such as these:
When, and how, and in just what instances did my selfish pursuit of the sex relation damage other people and me? What people were hurt, and how badly? Did I spoil my marriage and injure my children? Did I jeopardize my standing in the community? Just how did I react to these situations at the time? Did I burn with a guilt that nothing could extinguish? Or did I insist that I was the pursued and not the pursuer, and thus absolve myself? How have I reacted to frustration in sexual matters? When denied, did I become vengeful or depressed? Did I take it out on other people? If there was rejection or coldness at home, did I use this as a reason for promiscuity?

pp. 50-51

************************************************** *********

Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.
--Helen Keller

I believe in God -- this is a fine, praiseworthy thing to say, but to acknowledge God
wherever and however he manifest Himself, that in truth is heavenly bliss on earth.
--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Maximize your productive time by focusing on positive outcomes.
--unknown

Perseverance can tip the scales from failure to success.
--unknown

If you always do what you've always done, you will always be where you've always been.
--unknown

H O W = Honest, Open, Willing

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

FORGIVING

"He that cannot forgive others
breaks the bridge over which he
must pass himself. For every
man has need to be forgiven."
-- Thomas Fuller

My failings as an alcoholic help me to live with others today. The fact that I made and
make mistakes helps me to have creative relationships today. Because I know what
it is to fail, I can understand the failings of others. My weaknesses are a bridge
to understanding my fellow man.

By contrast when I was drinking, I thought I was perfect, always right and this led to
judgments, arguments and a self-imposed alienation.

Alcohol fed my arrogance and pride; sobriety helps develop humility and
understanding.

God, I understand that even my failings can be made to work for me in sobriety.

************************************************** *********

"The measure you give will be the measure you get back."
Luke 6:38

"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you
will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."
Matthew 7:1-2

In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and he answered by setting me free.
Psalm 118:5

Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose
heart."
Galatians 6:9

"But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with
wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not grow faint."
Isaiah 40:31

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Listen to hear and learn. Lord, help me to practice listening without judgment and interruption so that I fully benefit and truly comprehend the nature of what is being shared with me.

Learn to be peaceful in all situations and trust that through all stages of our lives, God has a plan. Lord, may I have the wisdom to be able to turn my stumbling blocks into building blocks.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

The Language Of Empathy

"... the addict would find from the start as much identification as each needed to convince himself that he could stay clean, by the example of others who had recovered for many years."
Basic Text p. 85

Many of us attended our first meeting and, not being entirely sure that NA was for us, found much to criticize. Either we felt as though no one had suffered like we had or that we hadn't suffered enough. But as we listened we started to hear something new, a wordless language with its roots in recognition, belief, and faith: the language of empathy. Desiring to belong, we kept listening.

We find all the identification we need as we learn to understand and speak the language of empathy. To understand this special language, we listen with our hearts. The language of empathy uses few words; it feels more than it speaks. It doesn't preach or lecture - it listens. It can reach out and touch the spirit of another addict without a single spoken word.

Fluency in the language of empathy comes to us through practice. The more we use it with other addicts and our Higher Power, the more we understand this language. It keeps us coming back.

Just for today: I will listen with my heart. With each passing day, I will become more fluent in the language of empathy.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
We all fear what we don't know--it's natural. --Leo Buscaglia
If we put a blindfold over our eyes and begin to walk around an open field, we would feel unsure with each step. We might be afraid of falling, afraid of walking over some unseen edge and hurting ourselves.
When any of us face something and we don't know what the outcome will be, we often feel blindfolded. We fear we may get hurt. We fear we can't do it. We have a hard time trusting ourselves. A blind person often finds help or guidance from others, or will gain confidence by walking on--slowly at first, finding trust and sureness with each step.
These same things help us when we are afraid. It is also helpful to remember there is no right or wrong way to explore what faces us--only our own way.
What new trust can I place in myself today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Archie Bunker: What's wrong with revenge? That's a perfect way to get even. --Norman Lear
When we are locked within negative, hostile thinking patterns, we go around in mental circles. What seems perfectly rational to us at the time looks misguided and blind when we look back. Carrying a grudge or a desire to get even with someone is a cancer inside us. It belittles us and holds back our spirit.
We break through our mental circles by revealing our anger to others. We talk with other recovering men and let them know the details of our resentments. We listen to their experiences and apply them in our program. As long as we keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves, we only recycle the same thinking system. When we take the risk and talk to friends, we build bridges that bring in new ideas.
I will not harbor my resentments within myself. I will talk with a trusted friend so I can learn to let them go.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills. --Minna Antrim
It is not by chance but by design that the sorrows we experience throughout our lives are countered by equal servings of joy. One offsets the other. And we are strengthened by their combination.
Our longing for only life's joys is human--also folly. Joy would become insipid if it were our steady diet. Joyful times serve us well as respites from the trying situations that push our growth and development as women.
Laughter softens the cutting edges of the lessons we seek or are cornered by. It offers perspective when the outlook is bleak. And for those of us who are recovering, wallowing in the bleaker times used to be acceptable behavior. But no more. The reality is that each day will present both occasions for anguish and ones inviting easy laughter. Both are valuable. Neither should dominate.
Joy and sorrow are analogous to the ebb and flow of the ocean tide. They are natural rhythms. And we are mellowed by their presence when we accept them as necessary to our very existence.
Any pain today guarantees an equal amount of pleasure, if I willingly accept them both.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Accepting Our Feelings
Why do we struggle so with our feelings? Why do we work so hard to deny our emotions, especially concerning other people? They are only feelings!
In the course of a day, we may deny we feel frustrated in reaction to someone who is selling us a service.
We may deny that we feel frustrated, angry, or hurt in reaction to a friend.
We may deny feelings of fear, or anger, toward our children.
We may deny a whole range of feelings toward our spouse or the person with whom we're in a love relationship.
We may deny feelings provoked by people we work for, or by people who work for us.
Sometimes the feelings are a direct reaction to others. Sometimes people trigger something deeper - an old sadness or frustration.
Regardless of the source of our feelings, they are still our feelings. We own them. And acceptance is often all that is necessary to make them go away.
We don't have to let our feelings control our behavior. We don't have to act on each feeling that passes through us. We do not need to indulge in inappropriate behavior.
It does help to talk about our feelings with someone we trust. Sometimes we need to bring our feelings to the person who is triggering them. That can breed intimacy and closeness. But the most important person we need to tell is ourselves. If we allow our feelings to pass through us, accept them, and release them, we shall know what to do next.
Today, I will remember that feelings are an important part of my life. I will be open to my feelings in family life, in friendships, in love, and at work. I will feel my feelings without judging myself.


I am so full of love and joy today. I see it everywhere I look, and feel it with every breath that I take. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Awaken to the Storyteller Within

Each of us has a story to tell, a story to share with the world.

Artists and writers are in the storytelling business. Others have different ways of telling and sharing their stories. The tackle shop owner sells bait, hooks, and sinkers and tells people where to fish and about the big one that got away. The master carpenter tells his story by carving and hanging a wooden door so well crafted that it swings shut gently on its own. The quilter tells her story by commemorating important moments from her life in quilts that are colorful works of art.

Each of us has a story to tell and our own way of sharing it with the world. It comes out through our words, through our work, and through the simple actions of our daily life. Listen to the stories of the people around you. Listen to your soul. Learn to value without judging and listen with an open heart to the beauty of each story and the importance of the storyteller. Learn to value and appreciate the story you are living now.

Awaken to the storyteller within and share your story with the world. Tell it with joy and flair. Commit to telling it with love and passion. Tell it through living your life fully, doing your work well, and creating the best life you can. Be who you are and love being that.

Live your life from your heart. Share from your heart. And your story will touch and heal people’s souls.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Respect the powers that be

I watched the man out the window as he dragged his kayak out to sea. Just as he’d get ready to launch, a huge frothy wave would come barreling over the top of him. The kayak would fly off in one direction. Then I’d see a paddle emerge form the sea. He’d walk back to his boat, try again, only to have himself and the boat tossed around by the wave. Finally, the last wave took the boat and threw it all the way to shore. When the man, in his thirties, stood up, he looked up at the heavens and stretched out his arms.

It was the surrender position, that what can I do but resign myself to the powers that be stance that some of us know so well.

Yes, we’re learning to believe in ourselves. We’re learning to say I can. But an important part of self-confidence and self-esteem is learning humilty
and respect for the powers that be. Set your goals. Pursue your dreams. Say what you want and learn to say when. Hold your head up high, but learn to sublimate yourself,too.

Sometimes you’ve just got to throw your hands up in the air and surrender to the powers that be.

God, help me let go of arrogance and receive the blessings that humility brings.

*****

The Dance of Intimacy
Coming Back to Center in a Relationship by Madisyn Taylor

In a long-term relationship it is often necessary to get back to basics and come back to center with each other.

Anyone in a long-term relationship knows that the dance of intimacy involves coming together and moving apart. Early in a relationship, intense periods of closeness are important in order to establish the ground of a new union. Just as a sapling needs a lot more attention than a full-grown tree, budding relationships demand time and attention if they are to fully take root. Once they become more established, the individuals in the union begin to turn their attention outward again, to the other parts of their lives that matter, such as work, family, and friendships. This is natural and healthy. Yet, if a long-term relationship is to last, turning towards one another recurrently, with the same curiosity, attention, and nurturance of earlier times, is essential.

In a busy and demanding world full of obligations and opportunities, we sometimes lose track of our primary relationships, thinking they will tend to themselves. We may have the best intentions when we think about how nice it would be to surprise our partner with a gift or establish a weekly date night. Yet somehow, life gets in the way. We may think that our love is strong enough to survive without attention. Yet even mature trees need water and care if they are to thrive.

One of the best ways to nourish a relationship is through communication. If you feel that a distance has grown between you and your partner, you may be able to bridge the gap by sharing how you feel. Do your best to avoid blame and regret. Focus instead on the positive, which is the fact that you want to grow closer together. Sometimes, just acknowledging that there is distance between you has the effect of bringing the relationship into balance. In other cases, more intense effort and attention may be required. You may want to set aside time to talk and come up with solutions together. Remember to have compassion for each other. You’re in the same boat together and trying to maintain the right balance of space and togetherness to keep your relationship healthy and thriving. Express faith and confidence in each other, and enjoy the slow dance of intimacy that can resume between the two of you. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I no longer argue with people who believe that satisfaction of our natural desires is the primary purpose of life. It’s not our business in The Program to knock material achievement. When we stop and think about it, in fact, no group of people ever made a worse mess of trying to live by that “la dolce vita” formula than we did. We always insisted on more than our share — in all areas. And even when we seemed to be succeeding, we fueled our addictions so that we could dream of still greater successes. Am I learning that material satisfactions are simply by-products and not the chief aim of life? Am I gaining the perspective to see that character-building and spiritual values must come first?

Today I Pray

May I recognize that I never did handle excesses very well, based on my past experience. I have been apt to “want more” of whatever it is I have — love, money, property, things, chemicals, foods, winnings. May The Program teach me that I must concentrate on my spiritual, rather than my material bounty.

Today I Will Remember

It’s okay to be spiritually greedy.

*************************************

One More Day

There is no formula for easy living. Anyone who says he has one is either joking or lying.
–Harold Russel

We all have, in our mind’s eye, a picture of what life would be like if we were healthy and wealthy and could do whatever we wanted with our days. If given the choice between health and sickness, wealth and poverty,, most people would choose the former of both. Yet, there are no assurances of easy living no matter how healthy or wealthy we are.

When our wish to “have it easy” becomes a preoccupation — our whole system can become stressed. We need to recognize that this wish for “having it easy” creates stress that we could avoid. Ironically, to escape this stress, we need to return to the reality of our own beautiful lives.

I have no guarantee for easy living, but I am guaranteed the chance to change and grow as often as I want to.

************************************

Food For Thought

Appetite Is Not Hunger

Confusing a "hearty" appetite with genuine, physical hunger is a mistake made consistently by compulsive overeaters. Our idea of how much food our body needs is usually a great exaggeration of the actual requirement. Because of an overdeveloped appetite, we are unfamiliar with the feeling of true hunger.

Since we cannot rely on subjective feelings to tell us how much we need to eat, we require an objective, definite plan. When we reach our normal weight, we continue to eat according to a measured food plan, rather than according to appetite. We will never be able to satisfy the demands of our appetite without destroying ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

When we think we require more food than is called for by our plan, we need to examine our thinking. Usually we find that we are being deluded by the demands of our overdeveloped appetite. We would like to eat more, but in fact, our body does not need more.

I pray for the wisdom to distinguish between appetite and hunger.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

THE PROMISES
“We will intuitively know how to handle situations
which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that
God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.”
The Big Book

When I first came into program and heard these words I couldn't grasp their meaning. Life baffled me. I had no idea who I was or what I was doing. I was completely in the grip of this disease. I felt like I was the disease. Why would God do anything for me?

Initially I thought these people were crazy and even worse off than I was. My opinion soon changed when I noticed wonderful differences between them and myself. They seemed calmer, verbalized their feelings more clearly, appeared to have their act together, and seemed to enjoy life. I was hooked! I wanted what they had. I finally wanted to want to live. I was drawn to those who demonstrated traits I wanted to have. I talked to them and listened when they shared. I asked them how to work the program and how to find my Higher Power. I started working the Steps. I began my search for a God I could relate to. I found online recovery loops and people who shared how they worked their program.

Then I had a crisis develop which almost overwhelmed me. Yet as I read the Big Book, I realized that the promises God had given to the other program people were given to me too. I had been so busy working this program that I needed to pause and examine all I had received. Yes, it does work when you work it. I proved it to myself by allowing God to prove it to me.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will remember that the promises really are for everyone and that they come into my life as I work my program to the best of my ability.
~ Judith A.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

The almost certain consequences that follow taking even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that this time we shall handle ourselves like other people. There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove. - Pg. 24 - There Is A Solution

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

The most important thing to know about Step Three, turning our will over to a Higher Power, is that all we can do is DECIDE to do it. There is no 'will' we can wrap and send. Once we make the decision to do this, our Higher Power will work for us through the rest of the Steps.

I decide to align my will with that of the Source of my Spirit.

Reinvestment

I have been through a journey of forgiveness. I've faced my anger and hurt and brought order and clarity to my inner world. I've accepted the things I cannot change and changed the things that I could. Because I've shown the courage to face my inner demons and look them in the eye, I feel stronger and more competent. Forgiveness of my self and others has offered me a way out of pain and confusion, and now I find I have a renewed interest in life. I see things differently. I feel liberated from something that was tying up me energy. And I recognize and accept my own humanity, and the humanity of others. I am ready and willing to reinvest in the ideal of love. I want to find worthy projects and passions, and put my energy toward them. I have something to give to the world and the world has something to give to me. I am right where I am supposed to be and I've met the challenges of my life. I am ready to live.

I invest my energy with care and gusto
- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

It is better to have some-one sober and hating you because you told them the truth, rather than have someone drunk and liking you because you told them a lie.

I don't heap on the bull**** when the truth is like Miracle Grow

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Along the road well traveled, there are many pity potholes.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am so full of love and joy today. I see it everywhere I look, and feel it with every breath that I take.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

If you went to a critical AIDS ward and said 'I've got a deal for you; would you come with me to some meetings, meet and chat with some people, take some actions that seem strange to you - would you do that if I could arrest your AIDS? They'd sign over their homes to you. But, go to the alcoholism ward where they're dying from this disease, and they won't go to an AA meeting two doors down the hall. - Clancy I.

[bluidkiti]

November 20

Daily Reflections

"THY WILL, NOT MINE"

. . . when making specific requests, it will be well
to add to each one of them this qualification. ." . . .
if it be Thy will."
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 102-03

I ask simply that throughout the day God place in me the
best understanding of His will that I can have for that
day, and that I be given the grace by which I may carry
it out. As the day goes on, I can pause when facing
situations that must be met and decisions that must be
made, and renew the simple request: "Thy will, not mine,
be done." I must always keep in mind that in every
situation I am responsible for the effort and God is
responsible for the outcome. I can "Let Go and Let God"
by humbly repeating: "Thy will, not mine, be done."
Patience and persistence in seeking His will for me will
free me from the pain of selfish expectations.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I no longer try to escape life through alcoholism. Drinking
built up an unreal world for me and I tried to live in it.
But in the morning light the real world was back again and
facing it was harder than ever, because I had less resources
with which to meet it. Each attempt at escape weakened my
personality by the very attempt. Everyone knows that alcohol,
by relaxing inhibitions, permits a flight from reality.
Alcohol deadens the brain cells that preside over our highest
faculties and we are off to the unreal world of drunkenness.
A.A. taught me not to run away, but to face reality. Have I
given up trying to escape life?

Meditation For The Day

In these times of quiet meditation, try more and more to set
your hopes on the grace of God. Know that whatever the future
may hold, it will hold more and more of good. Do not set all
your hopes and desires on material things. There is weariness
in an abundance of things. Set your hopes on spiritual things
so that you may grow spiritually. Learn to rely on God's power
more and more and in that reliance you will have an insight
into the greater value of things of the spirit.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may not be overwhelmed by material things.
I pray that I may realize the higher value of spiritual things.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Easy Does It--But Do It, p. 322

Procrastination is really sloth in five syllables.

<< << << >> >> >>

"My observation is that some people can get by with a certain amount of
postponement, but few can live with outright rebellion."

<< << << >> >> >>

"We have succeeded in confronting many a problem drinker with that
awful alternative, 'This we A.A.'s do, or we die.' Once this much is
firmly in his mind, more drinking only turns the coil tighter.

"As many an alcoholic has said, 'I came to the place where it was either
into A.A. or out the window. So here I am!"

1. 12 & 12, p. 67
2. Letter, 1952

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Estrangements
Amends
A number of alcoholics become estranged from members of their family. Sometimes these estrangements continue into sobriety and fester as a source of resentment.
Where estrangements have occurred, we are always responsible for any wrongs on our part. We need to check carefully to make sure that pride and bitterness on our part aren't prolonging the estrangement.
But some of these estrangements have been chosen by others. We need to accept them if we've done everything possible to correct the problem.
Honesty will be our guide as we look carefully at any estrangements in our lives. All that's ever necessary is that we use our best principles in dealing with any estrangements.
If I find today that an estrangement is bothering me or others in the program, I'll examine it carefully with the thought that either making amends or acceptance might be required.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

A man is too apt to forget that in this world he cannot have everything. A choice is all that is left him.---H. Mathews.
Sobriety is about choice. Each day we choose to stay sober, we teach ourselves how
to make better choices.
Life is about choice. To be spiritual people, we must make spiritual choices. Honesty is a spiritual choice. And working the Steps is a spiritual choice.
Our life is the sum total of our choices. We owe it to ourselves to choose wisely. We can do that now, thanks to the program.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me choose a spiritual way of life. Help me to see choice as my way to a better relationship with you.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll be aware of the many choices I make. At the end of the day, I'll think about all the choices I've made. Am I proud of my choices?

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Experience is a good teacher, but she sends in terrific bills. --Minna Antrim
It is not by chance but by design that the sorrows we experience throughout our lives are countered by equal servings of joy. One offsets the other. And we are strengthened by their combination.
Our longing for only life's joys is human--also folly. Joy would become insipid if it were our steady diet. Joyful times serve us well as respites from the trying situations that push our growth and development as women.
Laughter softens the cutting edges of the lessons we seek or are cornered by. It offers perspective when the outlook is bleak. And for those of us who are recovering, wallowing in the bleaker times used to be acceptable behavior. But no more. The reality is that each day will present both occasions for anguish and ones inviting easy laughter. Both are valuable. Neither should dominate.
Joy and sorrow are analogous to the ebb and flow of the ocean tide. They are natural rhythms. And we are mellowed by their presence when we accept them as necessary to our very existence.
Any pain today guarantees an equal amount of pleasure, if I willingly accept them both.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

You may have the reverse situation on your hands. Perhaps you have a husband who is at large, but who should be committed. Some men cannot or will not get over alcoholism. When they become too dangerous, we think the kind thing to do is to lock them up, but of course a good doctor should always be consulted. The wives and children of such men suffer horrible, but not more than the men themselves.
But sometimes you must start life anew. We know women who have done it. If such women adopt a spiritual way of life their road will be smoother.

p. 114

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

One thing led to another, and we wound up married. The most powerful motive I had was getting out of the streets and being provided for. I had begun to think I did not have much longer to live. The faces of my doctors were looking more and more grim every time I went into the hospital to dry out.

p. 464

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

Also of importance for most alcoholics are the questions they must ask about their behavior respecting financial and emotional security. In these areas fear, greed, possessiveness, and pride have too often done their worst. Surveying his business or employment record, almost any alcoholic can ask questions like these: In addition to my drinking problem, what character defects contributed to my financial instability? Did fear and inferiority about my fitness for my job destroy my confidence and fill me with conflict? Did I try to cover up those feelings of inadequacy by bluffing, cheating, lying, or evading responsibility? Or by griping that others failed to recognize my truly exceptional abilities? Did I overvalue myself and play the big shot? Did I have such unprincipled ambition that I double-crossed and undercut my associates? Was I extravagant? Did I recklessly borrow money, caring little whether it was repaid or not? Was I a pinch penny, refusing to support my family properly? Did I cut corners financially? What about the "quick money" deals, the stock market, and the races?

p. 51

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"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect."
--Margaret Mitchell

"Faith is the only known cure for fear."
--Lena K. Sadler

The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving
in the present.
--Barbara De Angelis

Love is the master key which opens the gates of happiness.
--Oliver Wendell Holmes

Sometimes we are so busy adding up our troubles that we forget to count our blessings.
--unknown

The right word spoken at the right time sometimes achieves miracles.
--unknown

Love is the only thing you get more of by giving it away.
--Tom Wilson

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

YESTERDAYS

"When I want to understand
what is happening today or try
to decide what will happen
tomorrow, I look back."
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

The writing is on the wall! My writing is on my wall and it is to be found in my life.
My history of my life teaches me about my alcoholism. Alcoholism is a personal
disease; it affects others through self.

Sometimes I am tempted to forget the past. Why live in yesterday? Because the
events of my yesterdays affect my today. The future is forged from the recognition of
my past. My disease grew strong in my denial. My recovery began with the acceptance
of reality my reality.

Today does not exist in a vacuum and my tomorrows are determined by the decisions I
make today. I also know and believe that my recovering life demands a true
recognition of my yesterdays.

Thank You for the historical progressiveness of my recovery.

************************************************** *********

He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have
destruction.
Proverbs 13:3

"This is the day the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it."
Psalm 118:24

Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do:
Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal
to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13-14

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due
time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
1 Peter 5:6-7

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Daily Inspiration

Time is yours to use or lose. Lord, teach me to avoid all upsetting thoughts and create a heart that glories in my time as a peaceful gift from You.

Begin each day with the certainty that today is the best day of your life and watch what happens. Lord, I celebrate my life and give thanks for everything because for everything there is a reason.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Finding Fulfillment

"We weren't oriented toward fulfillment; we focused on the emptiness and worthlessness of it all."
Basic Text p. 86

There were probably hundreds of times in our active addiction when we wished we could become someone else. We may have wished we could trade places with someone who owned a nice car or had a larger home, a better job, a more attractive mate - anything but what we had. So severe was our despair that we could hardly imagine anyone being in worse shape than ourselves.

In recovery, we may find we are experiencing a different sort of envy. We may continue to compare our insides with others' outsides and feel as though we still don't have enough of anything. We may think everyone, from the newest member to the oldest old-timer, sounds better at meetings than we do. We may think that everyone else must be working a better program because they have a better car, a larger home, more money, and so on.

The recovery process experienced through our Twelve Steps will take us from an attitude of envy and low self-esteem to a place of spiritual fulfillment and deep appreciation for what we do have. We find that we would never willingly trade places with another, for what we have discovered within ourselves is priceless.

Just for today: There is much to be grateful for in my life. I will cherish the spiritual fulfillment I have found in recovery.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Without solitude, there can be no real people. --John Euder
We all need some time alone. It's a good idea to set aside a few minutes every day to be alone with ourselves. This is a very special time that is all our own. It's a time to relax and refresh ourselves.
This goes for every member of the family, and it's important that we allow others some time for themselves. It shows them we respect, love, and care about them. Without that solitude, they cannot be truly themselves--and neither can we.
Nature teaches us that each thing, even the earth itself, needs a retreat. Bears hibernate; cats crawl off out of sight, even the plants disappear for the winter. It is this time that refreshes life for the Spring to come. If we want to have healthy, fulfilling relationships with each other, we all need time to ourselves every day. Without being "real people"--truly ourselves--how can we be full members of our family?
How can I better spend my time alone today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The most important function of art and science is to awaken the cosmic religious feeling and keep it alive. --Albert Einstein
There is no need to be concerned about a conflict between science and the spiritual life. People have turned to the spiritual in many ways since the beginning of humanity. Some are tribal and primitive, some very emotional, some focused on ideas and philosophy, some centered on tradition. Perhaps in the very center of our humanness is a spiritual compass. When we disown that orientation, do we lose some of our humanness? This program did not invent the spiritual outlook. It only tells us recovery will come through awakening of the spiritual within us.
We are on an exploration. We give ourselves over to it and only discover where our awakening will lead as it unfolds. The Steps tell us to engage with the God of our understanding, to develop a relationship of trust, total openness and humility, and to improve the contact. As the center of our humanness is restored, we come alive and our daily tasks take on new meaning.
May I be awakened again to that cosmic feeling we all inherit.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Continuous effort--not strength or intelligence--is the key to unlocking our potential. --Liane Cordes
Perseverance may well be our greatest asset. As we forge ahead on a project, it loses its power over us. Our confidence and abilities grow in concert with our progress on the project, preparing us to tackle the next one too.
We have something special, uniquely our own to offer in this life. And we also have the potential to offer it successfully. However, we don't always realize our potential. Many of us stifled our development with fears of failure, low self-worth, assumed inadequacies. The past need plague us no longer.
Help is readily available for us to discover our capacities for success. Abilities stand ready to be tapped, goals and projects await our recognition. Any commitment we make to a task that draws our interest will be reinforced by God's commitment to our efforts. We have a partner. Our efforts are always doubled when we make them--truly make them.
I will not back away from a project today. I will persevere and find completion. I'll feel completed.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Wants and Needs`
So many of us have been brainwashed to think that we can't have what we want in life. That is the belief of the martyr. It is born of deprivation and fear.
Identifying what we want and need, then writing it down, sets in motion a powerful chain of events. It indicates that we are taking responsibility for ourselves, giving God and the Universe permission to supply our wants and needs.
The belief that we deserve to have a change in character, a relationship, a new dimension to an existing relationship, a possession, a certain level of health, living, loving, or success, is a powerful force in bringing that desire to pass.
Often, when we realize that we want something, that feeling is God preparing us to receive it!
Listen. Trust. Empower the good in your life by paying attention to what you want and need. Write it down. Affirm it mentally. Pray about it. Then, let it go. Give it to God, and see what happens.
The results may be better than you think.
Today, I will pay attention to what I want and need. I will take time to write it down, and then I will let it go. I will begin to believe I deserve the best.


Today I know that I have done the best I can with my life. Today I know that I am at choice, and what I choose right now creates new memories. Today I choose to continue to do the very best. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Let Yourself Play

How long has it been since you played? How long has it been since you played at your life, had fun with it?

Our imaginations are so delightful when we’re young. Watch a child sit in the middle of the floor and build castles with blocks. Watch a child play– any object can be anything, and anything can be fun. Life can pound that out of us if we let it.

Breathe life back into your imagination. Come back to life. Let yourself see dragons in clouds and leprechauns in trees and velvet in a rose. Imagine what it would be like to grab a handful of cloud. Then touch the tree. And put the rose in your cheek.

Let your imagination come alive. Play the game of “What if?” What if anything could be anything. What if life could be fun?

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More Language Of Letting Go

Be prepared

Did you ever have a teacher in school who warned you at the beginning of the year that he would give tests without previous notice, so be prepared? We might not have liked it, but we appreciated being warned. We knew in that class that we needed to do our homework in a timely manner if we wanted a good grade. We kept our awareness up. We knew we couldn’t slide by.

When that test came, we were either prepared for it or at the very least, aware. We had been warned. We knew the test was coming.

When I decided to stop using alcohol and drugs and live a life of abstinence and recovery, I was tested many times. People put drugs and alcohol in my hand. Once, in the early months, soon after my decision, I failed the test and felt awful. Then I learned that important lesson, life would challenge my decision from time to time. I had to be prepared not only to make the choice to be sober, but to stand behind that decision each day.

When I decided to become a writer, things moved along well for the first few years, then I began hitting some walls. I hit a dry spell. No words came out. The results weren’t as I had planned. It was time to decide if I wanted to stand behind my decision or fold.

We will be given tests without notice, on almost every decision we make and boundary we set. Each time we say I can, we will be tested. And drawing from personal experience, the test is never one we would have chosen. It’s often ugly, inconvenient, and hits us at our weakest spot.

Don’t feel victimized or tortured when out test comes. Be prepared. Let it teach you more about yourself, what you want, and how badly you want it. Use it as resistance, the kind we can push against to become clearer about who we are and what we want. Sometimes we don’t really want what we thought we did. Other times we do. We aren’t in school anymore, at least not grade school. The test isn’t for the teacher’s benefit. It’s for our benefit– to teach us how much we’ve learned.

Don’t worry. I’ve been told we’ll never be given a test we can’t pass.

So get ready. You’ve been warned.

Be aware.

The test could come at any time.

God, help me let go of my resistance to the little tests life throws my way. Instead, help me use these tests as a chance to get to know myself and you better. Help me do my best.

*****

Progressing with Patience
Doing the Best You Can by Madisyn Taylor

Try not to expect perfection when starting out on a spiritual path or attaining inner peace.

It isn’t always easy to meet the expectations we hold ourselves to. We may find ourselves in a situation such as just finishing a relaxing yoga class or meditation retreat, a serene session of deep breathing, or listening to some calming, soul-stirring music, yet we have difficulty retaining our sense of peace. A long line at the store, slow-moving traffic, or another stressful situation can unnerve you and leave you wondering why the tranquility and spiritual equilibrium you cultivate is so quick to dissipate in the face of certain stressors. You may feel guilty and angry at yourself or even feel like a hypocrite for not being able to maintain control after practicing being centered. However, being patient with yourself will help you more in your soul’s journey than frustration at your perceived lack of progress. Doing the best you can in your quest for spiritual growth is vastly more important than striving for perfection.

Just because you are devoted to following a spiritual path, attaining inner peace, or living a specific ideology doesn’t mean you should expect to achieve perfection. When you approach your personal evolution mindfully, you can experience intense emotions such as anger without feeling that you have somehow failed. Simply by being aware of what you are experiencing and recognizing that your feelings are temporary, you have begun taking the necessary steps to regaining your internal balance. Accepting that difficult situations will arise from time to time and treating your reaction to them as if they are passing events rather than a part of who you are can help you move past them. Practicing this form of acceptance and paying attention to your reactions in order to learn from them will make it easier for you to return to your center more quickly in the future.

Since your experiences won’t be similar to others’ and your behavior will be shaped by those experiences, you may never stop reacting strongly to the challenging situations you encounter. Even if you are able to do nothing more than acknowledge what you are feeling and that there is little you can do to affect your current circumstances, in time you’ll alter your reaction to such circumstances. You can learn gradually to let negative thoughts come into your mind, recognize them, and then let them go. You may never reach a place of perfect peace, but you’ll find serenity in having done your best.

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

I’ve come to measure success in a whole new way. My success today isn’t limited by social or economic benchmarks. Success is mine today, no matter what the undertaking, when I tap the power of god within me and allow myself to be an open channel for the expression of His good. The spirit of success works through me as creative ideas and useful service — as efficient use of my time and energy, and as cooperative effort with others. Will I try to keep my mind centered in the realization that within me is the God -implanted power to succeed?

Today I Pray

May I develop a new concept of success, based on measurements of the good qualities which come from God’s treasure-filled bank of good. To draw from that bank, all I have to do is look within myself. May I know that God’s riches are the only kind that are fully insurable, because they are infinite. May I look in God’s bank for my security.

Today I Will Remember

Spiritual “success” is my security.

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One More Day

There is no hope unmingled with fear, and no fear unmingled with hope.
– Baruch Spinoza

Most of us are frightened each time we go through a major life change, for we fear what we do not know. We thought we had our lived planned. Because a crisis occurs unexpectedly, there is no way to prepare for a burglary, a broken leg, or a loss of a loved one. these events can throw us and our lives into a tailspin.

If the event is short-lived, like a bad case of the flu or a minor injury, we forget it quickly. If, however, the effects are long-lasting, we work to incorporate them into our daily living. Adapting in this way forces us to look for the positive parts of the day. We get into the habit of remembering good times and hope — even expect — better times to come.

I can see that positive action and thought is needed. I will find good people and events in this day.

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Food For Thought

Eating For Mother

As babies and children, we made Mother happy by eating what she gave us. Since our emotions were closely tied to hers, when she was happy, we were also happy. We may have developed the mistaken notion that the more we ate, the happier Mother would be and, therefore, the happier we would be.

This illusion may be persisting into our adult life. On some level, we may not yet realize that no amount of food we can eat will make Mother permanently happy, anymore than it will make us happy. We may have eaten many times in the past in order to please Mother, rather than because we really wanted food. Subconsciously, we may still think we could please her by consuming more food than we need.

Working the OA program often brings to light other things we are doing in order to please someone else. Since each individual is responsible for his or her own happiness, there is nothing we can do to ensure the happiness of another individual. Realizing this on a gut level is a powerful tool for maintaining abstinence.

May I realize the/utility of eating to please someone else.

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One Day At A Time

~ PATIENCE ~
Patience is the key to paradise.
Turkish proverb

I used to be the queen of the "quick fix." Anything I wanted done had to be done today, if not yesterday. I'd even do a job myself because I couldn't wait for someone else to do it in their time. I ended up chasing my tail most days, and trying to run the show myself, simply because I couldn't wait. Even all the many diets that I went on had to get results fast or they weren't worth their salt. Small wonder, being the compulsive person that I was, that when I wanted to eat, there was no such thing in my vocabulary as delayed gratification. When I wanted it, I had to have it right then.

Imagine my horror at coming into the program and seeing that people who had been in the fellowship for years were still there. Surely they should have gotten it right by now and graduated from this program. But I soon learned that this is not something we graduate from. Recovery and abstinence happen in God's time, not mine. I've had to learn that this a journey. Progress can sometimes be painfully slow, but the rewards for those who wait for the miracle is a gift I wouldn't want to be without. Not only am I offered freedom from compulsive eating, but also sanity and serenity to live my life the way I was intended to do.

One Day at a Time . . .
Even when progress seems slow, I will keep coming back and working the program to the best of my ability, knowing that recovery will come to me if I wait.
~ Sharon S. ~

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

When intense cravings for our drug of choice overwhelm us, we immediately talk to another person in recovery, no matter the time. Our program teaches us to rely on each other and they will welcome the contact!

Give me the strength to contact another clean and sober person BEFORE I think of satisfying that craving.

The Creative Power of My Thoughts

Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being there for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were mine. I will be specific about what I see, smell, feel, and I will accept my inner vision as fully as possible. I will enjoy my vision, then let it go and move on in my day, releasing it with no thought of controlling it further. I will let it happen, if it is right for me, in God's time.

All good things are possible for me.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

We may have empathy for your situation but we will not pity you. We know that pitying you leads to you pitying yourself which leads to mind-affecting chemicals. Rather than pity you, if you need an attitude adjustment, it's very likely a fellow group member will let you know.

Attitudes are contagious. Is mine worth catching?

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Don't 'people please', 'Higher Power Please.'

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know that I have done the best I can with my life. Today I know that I am at choice, and what I choose right now creates new memories. Today I choose to continue to do the very best.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

They take good scotch, put juice, soda, bitters and God knows what in it, shake it up, stick an umbrella in it - That's alcohol abuse. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

November 21

Daily Reflections

A CLASSIC PRAYER

Lord, make me a channel for thy peace - that where
there is hatred, I may bring love - that where there
is wrong. I may bring the spirit of forgiveness -
that where there is discord, I may bring harmony -
that where there is error, I may bring truth -
that where there is doubt, I may bring faith -
that where there is despair, I may bring hope -
that where there are shadows, I may bring light -
that where there is sadness, I may bring joy.
Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than
to be comforted - to understand, than to be
understood - to love, than to be loved. For it is
by self-forgetting that one finds. It is by
forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying
that one awakens to Eternal Life.
Amen.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 99

No matter where I am in my spiritual growth, the
St. Francis prayer helps me improve my conscious
contact with the God of my understanding. I think
that one of the great advantages of my faith in
God is that I do not understand Him, or Her, or
It. It may be that my relationship with my Higher
Power is so fruitful that I do not have to understand.
All that I am certain of is that if I work the
Eleventh Step regularly, as best I can, I will
continue to improve my conscious contact, I will
know His will for me, and I will have the power to
carry it out.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I no longer waste money, but try to put it to good
use. Like all of us, when I was drunk, I threw money
around "like a drunken sailor." It gave me a feeling
of importance--a millionaire for a day. But the
morning after, with an empty wallet and perhaps some
undecipherable checks to boot, was a sad awakening.
One of the hardest things to face is the fact of
wasted money. How could I have been such a fool? How
will I ever make it up? Thoughts like these get you
down. When we are sober, we spend our hard earned
money as it should be spent. Although some of us
could be more generous in our A.A. giving, at least
we do not throw it away. Am I making good use of my
money?

Meditation For The Day

You were meant to be at home and comfortable in the
world. Yet some people live a life of quiet
desperation. This is the opposite of being at home
and at peace with the world. Let your peace of mind
be evident to those around you. Men should see that
you are comfortable, and seeing it, know that it
springs from your trust in a higher power. The dull,
hard way of resignation is not God's way. Faith
takes the sting out of the winds of adversity and
brings peace even in the midst of struggle.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be more comfortable in my way
of living. I pray that I may feel more at home and
at peace with myself.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Groping Toward God, p. 323

"More than most people, I think, alcoholics want to know who they
are, what this life is about, whether they have a divine origin and an
appointed destiny, and whether there is a system of cosmic justice and
love.

"It is the experience of many of us in the early stages of drinking to
feel that we have had glimpses of the Absolute and a heightened
feeling of identification with the cosmos. While these glimpses and
feelings doubtless have a validity, they are deformed and finally swept
away in the chemical, spiritual, and emotional damage wrought by the
alcohol itself.

"In A.A., and in many religious approaches, alcoholics find a great deal
more of what they merely glimpse and felt while trying to grope their
way toward God in alcohol."

Letter, 1960

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Walk In Dry Places

Alcoholism in the workplace
Employment
Most of the personal stories in AA include troubles in the workplace. This is not surprising, because the disease itself almost guarantees that an active alcoholic is likely to make more mistakes, have higher absenteeism, and get into trouble with bosses and/or fellow employees. Who really wants a practicing alcoholic on the payroll? Who would want such a person as a manager or employer? Who wants to be treated by a doctor who is drunk or badly hung over.
If our alcoholism created problems in the workplace, we have no moral right to blame others who held us accountable for this. Far from blaming others who were critical of us, we owe personal amends for any harm we caused employers or fellow workers.
The good news is that recovery makes it possible for us to perform up to acceptable standards at work and carry out our responsibilities. In sobriety, we can write a new chapter and establish a good work history.
In my work today, I'll keep in mind the wonderful advantages I have as a result of knowing and practicing the AA principles. As a recovering alcoholic, I can be a positive force in an organization.

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Keep It Simple

To love others, we must first learn to love ourselves.---Anonymous
Sometimes we think our life would be fine if that dream person showed up. But loving someone isn’t easy. Our bad habits cause problems. We have to change. Sometimes we aren’t ready to have on especial person. We have to have a group of people---our recovery group---to love and help us get healthy. We must learn to trust, to be honest, to give help, and to love others. The truth is, no one person can make our life wonderful---except us. We hold happiness inside of us. It’s in our spirit. Look no further.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me love myself
Action for the Day: I’ll list five ways I will love myself today.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Continuous effort--not strength or intelligence--is the key to unlocking our potential. --Liane Cordes
Perseverance may well be our greatest asset. As we forge ahead on a project, it loses its power over us. Our confidence and abilities grow in concert with our progress on the project, preparing us to tackle the next one too.
We have something special, uniquely our own to offer in this life. And we also have the potential to offer it successfully. However, we don't always realize our potential. Many of us stifled our development with fears of failure, low self-worth, assumed inadequacies. The past need plague us no longer.
Help is readily available for us to discover our capacities for success. Abilities stand ready to be tapped, goals and projects await our recognition. Any commitment we make to a task that draws our interest will be reinforced by God's commitment to our efforts. We have a partner. Our efforts are always doubled when we make them--truly make them.
I will not back away from a project today. I will persevere and find completion. I'll feel completed.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

If your husband is a drinker, you probably worry over what other people are thinking and you hate to meet your friends. You draw more and more into yourself and you think everyone is talking about conditions at your home. You avoid the subject of drinking, even with your own parents. You do not know what to tell your children. When your husband is bad, you become a trembling recluse, wishing the telephone had never been invented.

pp. 114-115

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

The marriage was a farce, and it didn't take long for this man to figure that out. Someone had told him about my past, and he demanded to know the truth. I was tired, nauseated, and drunk. I just didn't care anymore, so I admitted everything. We fought everyday after that, and my visits to the hospital became more frequent. One afternoon I decided I no longer wanted to live and got the gun from over the fireplace. I owe my life to the man I had married. He heard my child scream and came running into the house. He grabbed the gun and wrestled it away from me. I was numb and couldn't figure out what had happened. My son was taken away from me bu the authorities, and I was placed in a locked ward for the criminally insane. I spent three days there on legal hold.

pp. 464-465

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

Businesswomen in A.A. will naturally find that many of these questions apply to them, too. But the alcoholic housewife can also make the family financially insecure. She can juggle charge accounts, manipulate the food budget, spend her afternoons gambling, and run her husband into debt by irresponsibility, waste, and extravagance.

p. 51

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Life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful.
--Annette Funicello

Happiness is an inside job.
--unknown

"People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges."
--Joseph Fort Newton

AA is not something you join, it's a way of life.
--unknown

I trust God's plan for me today.
I know that I am being guided at all times.
I know all I need to know in any given moment.
--Ruth Fishel

Don't stare at the steps of success - step up the stairs.
--American Proverb

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

HEROES

"Self-trust is the essence of
heroism."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

In my recovery I have become my hero. It sounds egotistical but it is part of my
program of self-love. I have many other heroes but today I respect myself. Today I
believe that God is involved in my life; an aspect of divinity exists within me. I trust
me with my life, and I am proud of the daily choices I make for my sobriety.

Spirituality allows me to be my hero today because it is with my respect of self that I
can truly respect others; the awareness of my dignity affords dignity to others; my
personal healing brings healing to others.

Today I am the center of my universe.

Thank You for the awareness of the achievements and successes in my life; today I am
my own winner.

************************************************** *********

"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and give
glory to your Father who is in Heaven."
Matthew 5:16

"As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us."
Psalm 103:12

And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the
beginning, his command is that you walk in love.
2 John 1:6

The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:17-18

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Daily Inspiration

Don't spoil what you already have by using up your time wanting what you don't have. Lord, may I live with gratitude and take back my life because my life is not and never will be in the hands of fate.

When you feel anger, allow yourself no more than 5 minutes because after that, anger is self-indulging and turns quickly to hatred and rage. Lord, You are a forgiving God. Heal my hurts.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Letting Our Defects Go

"If [character defects] contributed to our health and happiness, we would not have come to such a state of desperation."
Basic Text pg. 34

Getting started on the Sixth and Seventh Steps isn't always easy. We may feel as though we have so much wrong with us that we are totally defective. We might feel like hiding under a rock. Under no circumstance would we want our fellow addicts to know about our inadequacies.

We will probably go through a time of examining everything we say and do in order to identify our character defects and make sure we suppress them. We may look back at one particular day, cringing at what we're certain is the most embarrassing thing we've ever said. We become determined to be rid of these horrible traits at all costs. But nowhere in the Sixth or Seventh Steps does it say we can learn to control our defects of character. In fact, the more attention we focus on them, the more firmly entrenched they will become in our lives. It takes humility to recognize that we can't control our defects any more than we can control our addiction. We can't remove our own defects; we can only ask a loving God to remove them.

Letting go of something painful can be as difficult as letting go of something pleasant. But let's face it - holding on is a lot of work. When we really think about what we're holding onto, the effort just isn't worthwhile. It's time to let go of our character defects and ask God to remove them.

Just for today: I'm ready to have my defects removed. I will let go and allow a loving Higher Power to care for me.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
We decided that it was no good asking what is the meaning of life, because life isn't an answer, life is the question, and you, yourself, are the answer. --Ursula K. LeGuin
How many times have we felt like we were drifting aimlessly, constantly searching for meaning in a world that seems so mixed up, seeking direction but getting nowhere? But looked at differently, "nowhere" becomes "now here." When we take things apart, stand back, and examine them from a different angle, we often find we held the answer from the beginning. Sometimes, when we're convinced we are the problem, we discover we were the solution all along.
When we look for true understanding, we can be sure it exists in this moment, and that we can find it within ourselves, with God's help.
What question do I seek an answer to today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
For the trouble is that we are self-centered, and no effort of the self can remove the self from the centre of its own endeavor. --William Temple
This quagmire of troubles we men were caught in came, in part, from our best efforts to be self-sufficient. The harder we worked to provide our own cures, to control others in our lives, or to control ourselves, the more we fixed our attention upon ourselves. We could not see that the answers we were using were actually part of the problem, not the solution.
Even today we may be partially caught in the folly of this thinking. Whenever we think we see our problems and the answers clearly but don't open our incomplete selves to the wisdom of others, we are in danger of intensifying our self-focus. When we have a pattern of telling our fellow members the completed stories of our pain only when our pain has passed, we are maintaining our self-centered system. We can't lift ourselves out of our self-centeredness. We can only turn it over to our Higher Power and allow ourselves to be released.
I am grateful for the healing, which comes when I stop being so self-centered in my efforts.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
. . . as awareness increases, the need for personal secrecy almost proportionately decreases. --Charlotte Painter
We hang onto secrets when we're unsure of ourselves and the role we're asked to play--secrets about our inner thoughts, our dreams and aspirations, our feared inadequacies.
Because we strive for perfection, assume it's achievable, and settle for no less in all our activities, we are haunted by our secret fears of not measuring up. The more committed we become to this program, the greater is our understanding of the fallacy of this way of thinking. And as our awareness increases, the more accepting we become of our human frailty, and the less need we have to cover it up. Our mental health is measurable by the openness we offer to the world. Secrets belie good health and heighten the barriers to it.
The program's Fourth and Fifth Steps are the antidotes to being stuck in an unhealthy state of mind. They push us to let go of our secrets, freeing us from the power they wield. Practicing the principles of the program offers the remedy we need for the happiness we deserve.
I will share a secret today and be free of its power over my life.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Financial Fears
I sat in the car, looking at the sign on the door of the food shelf office: "Closed until Friday." It was Wednesday. I had two hungry children and myself; I had no money.
I laid my head on the steering wheel. I couldn't take it anymore.
I had been so strong, so brave, so trusting for so long. I was a single parent with two children, recently divorced. I had worked so courageously at being grateful for what I had, while setting financial goals and working at believing I deserved the best.
I had put up with so much poverty, so much deprivation. Daily, I worked the Eleventh Step. I worked so hard at praying for knowledge of God's will for me only, and the power to carry it through. I believed I was doing what I needed to do in my life. I wasn't lollygagging. I was doing my best, working my hardest.
And there just wasn't enough money. Life had been a struggle in many ways, but the financial struggle seemed endless.
Money isn't everything, but it takes money to solve certain problems. I was sick of "letting go" and "letting go" and "letting go." I was sick of "acting as if" I had enough money. I was tired of having to work so hard daily at letting go of the pain and fear about not having enough. I was tired of working so hard at being happy without having enough. Actually, most of the time I was happy. I had found my soul in poverty. But now that I had my soul and my self, I wanted some money too.
While I sat in the car trying to compose myself, I heard God speak to me in that silent, still voice that whispers gently to our souls.
"You don't ever have to worry about money again, child. Not unless you want to. I told you that I would take care of you. And I will."
Great, I thought. Thanks a lot. I believe you. I trust you. But look around. I have no money. I have no food. And the food shelf is closed. You've let me down.
Again I heard His voice in my soul: "You don't have to worry about money again. You don't have to be afraid. I promised to meet all your needs.
I went home, called a friend, and asked to borrow some money. I hated borrowing, but I had no choice. My breakdown in the car was a release, but it didn't solve a thing - that day. There was no check in the mailbox.
But I got food for the day. And the next day. And the next. Within six months, my income doubled. Within nine months, it tripled. Since that day, I have had hard times, but I have never had to go without - not for more than a moment in time.
Now, I have enough. Sometimes I still worry about money because that seems to be habitual. But now I know I don't have to, and I know I never did.
God, help me work hard at what I believe is right for me in my life today, and I'll trust You for the rest. Help me let go of my fears about money. Help me turn that area over to You. God. Take away the blocks and barriers in my life to financial success.


I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment.
--Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart
November 21
Cherish Moments of Solitude

The clerk at the lodge guided me to my cabin, a small secluded house a mile away from the main lodge on the northern California coast. “Will you be okay here?” he asked. “All by yourself?” I answered yes. And meant it.

My ability to be at peace with solitude has taken a lifetime of cultivation. Peaceful solitude is different from isolation, being forced to be alone. It’s different from forced seclusion, where we grasp frantically for some kind of connection, something to make us feel not alone, then finally sink fearfully and unwillingly into isolation.

On our adventures, we are called to face many fears. The universe won’t let us hide from our fears, at least not for long. One of the fears we may be called to face is fear of being alone.

We may need to face it, feel it, heal fom it– or we will be grasping, settling for, surrounding ourselves with anything or anybody so we don’t have to be alone. If we don’t face it, solitude will become, instead, solitary confinement.

Cultivate moments of solitude. Learn to cherish your privacy, your quiet time. Learn to be comfortable being alone with yourself.

The more content you can become in moments of solitude, the more joy and love you’ll discover in times with others. Cultivate solitude. It will help you cultivate love.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

You won’t get more than you can handle

… God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond that which ye are able, but with the temptation, will also make a way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.
–The Bible

“I’m taking care of my roommate and worrying about three of my clients. People always say that you’ll never get more than you can handle. But that;s not true if you’re trying to handle other people’s stuff. that can be too much,” a therapist and friend of mine said.

Most of us have heard throughout our lives that we’ll never get more than we can handle or bear. The load will not be too heavy. If we’re given it, we can rise to the occasion and accomplish the task.

They didn’t say the load wouldn’t be heavy. They didn’t say the task could easily be done. And they didn’t say we’d be given the grace and strength to bear the load of burdens that weren’t ours.

Sometimes it feels like too much. I know how that feels.

It’s not.

You’re up to the task, whatever it is, whether it feels like you are or not.

God, please give me all I need today, including enough joy.

*****

Growing Day by Day
Becoming a Better Person by Madisyn Taylor

We understand that we want to be better but have no clear definition of what better means and that is part of the process.

At some point in our lives, many of us find ourselves overcome with the desire to become better people. While we are all uniquely capable of navigating this world, we may nonetheless feel driven to grow, expand, and change. This innate need for personal expansion can lead us down many paths as we develop within the context of our individual lives. Yet the initial steps that can put us on the road to evolution are not always clear. We understand that we want to be better but have no clear definition of “better.” To ease this often frustrating uncertainty, we can take small steps, keeping our own concept of growth in mind rather than allowing others to direct the course of our journey. And we should accept that change won’t happen overnight—we may not recognize the transformations taking place within us at first.

Becoming a better person in your own eyes is a whole-life project, and thus you should focus your step-by-step efforts on multiple areas of your existence. Since you likely know innately which qualities you consider good, growing as an individual is simply a matter of making an effort to do good whenever possible. Respect should be a key element of your efforts. When you acknowledge that all people are deserving of compassion, consideration, and dignity, you are naturally more apt to treat them in the manner you yourself wish to be treated. You will intuitively become a more active listener, universally helpful, and truthful. Going the extra mile in all you do can also facilitate evolution. Approaching your everyday duties with an upbeat attitude and positive expectations can help you make the world a brighter, more cheerful place. Finally, coming to terms with your values and then abiding by them will enable you to introduce a new degree of integrity and dignity into your l! ife.

As you endeavor to develop yourself further, you can take pride not only in your successes, but also in the fact that you are cultivating consciousness within yourself through your choices, actions, and behaviors. While you may never feel you have reached the pinnacles of awareness you hope to achieve, you can make the most of this creative process of transformation. Becoming a better person is your choice and is a natural progression in your journey of self-awareness. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Adversity introduces man to himself, a poet once said. For me, the same is true of even imagined adversity. If I expect another person to react in a certain way in a given situation — and he or she fails to meet my expectation — well, then I hardly have the right to be disappointed or angry. Yet I occasionally still experience feelings of frustration when people don’t act or react as I think they should. Through such imagined — or, better yet, self-inflicted — adversity, I come to face to face again with my old self — the one who wanted to run the whole show. Is it time for me to finally stop expecting and to start accepting?

Today I Pray

May I stop putting words in people’s mouths, programming them — in my own mind — to react as I expect them to. Expectations have fooled me before; I expect unbounded love and protection from those close to me, perfection from myself, undivided attention from casual acquaintances. On the adverse side, I expected failure from myself, and rejection from others. May I stop borrowing trouble — or triumph either — from the future.

Today I Will Remember

Accept. Don’t expect.

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One More Day

To most of us the real life is the life we do not lead.
–Oscar Wilde

We don’t enjoy feeling envious, but there are times when we find ourselves wishing we had what others do. “I wish my body could do what hers does.” “I wish I didn’t have to take all this medicine. He doesn’t have to.”

After feeling envious, we need to return to our own lives with enthusiasm. While we may not be able to do what others do or have what others have, our lives are filled with experiences that can make us rich and able people. Regardless of who we are, what we own, or how we live, each of us is living a very important life — complete with pain, memories, and pleasure.

I respect myself and this life I am living. Today, I will concentrate on it’s joys and treasures.

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Food For Thought

Moods

We used to allow our moods to determine what and how much we ate. If we were feeling good, charged up with enthusiasm, we were usually able to focus our energy on some activity other than eating. Perhaps being in a particularly good mood made it possible for us to stick to some kind of diet for a few days.

When the bad moods struck, we invariably turned to excess food for consolation, and we attempted to make the bad moods go away by eating to excess. Any sort of psychic distress became a signal for food.

Then, too, some of us found ourselves overeating in times of elation, because we had no other way to express our joy.

When we are committed to abstinence, we have a rock like foundation for our eating habits, which no shifting mood can destroy. No matter how we may feel at a given moment, we abstain from eating compulsively. Moods change and pass away, but abstinence remains.

Make firm my commitment to abstinence.

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One Day At A Time

~ WILLINGNESS ~
If you have decided you want what we have
and are willing to go to any length to get it
then you are ready to take certain steps.
Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous

Willingness was one of the hardest concepts to get through my disease thinking. I was only willing to have my disease cured so I could continue indulging in my allergic substances of choice. According to the dictionary, the definition of will is "the power of choosing what one will do" and "willing, favorably inclined; ready." My disease was in control and chose for me.

I didn't want to stay stuck in the food. Then I found this program. Still, I had trouble with the concept of willingness. Then I relapsed, but the food didn't cure anything. This program, like the Big Book says, had ruined it for me. So, when I found some online recovery loops I found renewed hope. Hope led me to learning about willingness from others' sharing. Then I figured, ok God, I don't want to give up the allergic substances, they are too strongly embedded in my fibers, but I am willing to ask You to grant me the willingness to let go of those substances that aren't healthy for me.

I kept up this prayer for weeks. One day I discovered that it had been a week since I had thought about or eaten one of those allergic substances. I figured this must be what was meant by God doing for me what I can't do for myself. So I changed my prayer and asked God to keep making me willing, just for today, to go without those foods. It is working, not because of me, but because I was finally ready to ask for willingness. As the saying goes, "Try it, you'll like it!" I tried it and I liked the results... A God-given abstinence. Now, as I go about my day, it's becoming easier to be willing to turn more and more of my will over to the God of my understanding.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will go to the God of my understanding and ask for the willingness to live according to His will for me; so that I may have a life, and not self-will run riot.
Judy

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon. - Pg. 59 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

There is a certain universality to the truths taught in our 12 step programs. They are nothing new. These principles are derived from eons of experience and spirituality. What is new is our personal understanding that living these principles gives us a reprieve from our addiction.

Thank you God, as I understand You, for my daily reprieve from addiction based on my sincere attempt to practice these principles.

Standing in Self

Today, I own the truth of my recovery. If I am to stand centered and strong within my life and self, I will need to plant a garden within my own soul. A garden for me to nurture and to nurture me. A haven of beauty. I will find my own voice and sing my song because if I don't sing it, it will not be sung. It is all I have and it is enough. I do not need to prove anything to anyone anymore. I have come home - to me. The truth is, I was here all along, only I forgot to look for myself. Instead, I searched for me in other people's meaning and became lost in their stories. I am not lost today. I know that there is nowhere to look for me but within myself, and no one to lead me there but me.

Thank you, life, for letting me see this.
- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

When working Steps Six and Seven we honestly have to ask ourselves 'Do I really want to give up the defect? Or do I just want to give up the result of the defect?'

Being an alcoholic does not give me the excuse to act alcoholically.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

You can be a human being-you don't have to be a human doing.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I trust God's plan for me today. I know that I am being guided at all times. I know all I need to know in any given moment.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Knowing why I was an alcoholic doesn't help. The ship hits an iceberg, it's sinking, everyone is rowing away. But you're on the deck saying; 'I'm not leaving this baby until I understand what happened.' - Clancy I.

[bluidkiti]

November 22

Daily Reflections

ONLY TWO SINS

. . . . there are only two sins; the first is to
interfere with the growth of another human being,
and the second is to interfere with one's own growth.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 542

Happiness is such an elusive state. How often do my
"prayers" for others involve "hidden" prayers for my
own agenda? How often is my search for happiness a
boulder in the path of growth for another, or even
myself? Seeking growth through humility and acceptance
brings things that appear to be anything but good,
wholesome and vital. Yet in looking back, I can see
that pain, struggles and setbacks have all contributed
eventually to serenity through growth in the program.
I ask my Higher Power to help me not cause another's
lack of growth today - or my own.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I have got rid of most of my boredom. One of the
hardest things that a new member of A.A. has to
understand is how he can stay sober and not be bored.
Drinking was always the answer to all kinds of boring
people and boring situations. But once you have taken
up the interest of A.A., once you have given it your
time and enthusiasm, boredom should not be a problem
to you. A new life opens up before you that can be
always interesting. Sobriety should give you so many
new interests in life that you shouldn't have time
to be bored. Have I got rid of the fear of being bored?

Meditation For The Day

"If I have not charity, I am become as sounding brass or
a tinkling cymbal." Charity means to care enough about
your fellow man to really want to do something for
him. A smile, a word of encouragement, a word of love,
goes winged on its way, simple enough it may seem,
while the mighty words of an orator fall on deaf ears.
Use up the odd moments of your day in trying to do
some little thing to cheer up your fellow man.
Boredom comes from thinking too much about yourself.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that my day may be brightened by some little
act of charity. I pray that I may try today to overcome
the self-centeredness that makes me bored.

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As Bill Sees It

Spirituality and Money, p. 324

Some of us still ask, "Just what is this Third Legacy business anyhow?
And just how much territory does "service" take in?"

Let's begin with my own sponsor, Ebby. When Ebby heard how serious
my drinking was, he resolved to visit me. He was in New York; I was in
Brooklyn. His resolve was not enough; he had to take action and he had
to spend money.

He called me on the phone and then got into the subway; total cost, ten
cents. At the level of the telephone booth and subway turnstile,
spirituality and money began to mix. One without the other would have
amounted to nothing at all.

Right then and there, Ebby established the principle that A.A. in action
calls for the sacrifice of much time and a little money.

A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 140-141

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Walk In Dry Places

Too smart to stay sober
Humility
"I've never seen anybody who's too dumb to stay sober. But I've met a few people who were too smart." These wise words by an older member sum up what we sometimes see.... people who feel turned off by the program because it seems to simple and involves so many people of ordinary education and backgrounds.
Alcoholism is much like other diseases in the way it strikes all people. Diabetes, for example, victimizes people of all intelligence and education levels. We could never believe that being smart would give us an advantage in dealing with such an illness.
In the same way, the very smart person, has no edge over others in gaining sobriety. In fact, pride in such gifts can be a stumbling block. It can be a barrier to the simple acceptance and surrender needed for success in the 12 Step Program.
We do have many very smart people in AA. They are also wise enough to know that nobody can outsmart John Barleycorn.
We can feel grateful for mental abilities and education that halp us get along in the world. Our sobriety, however, is a separate type of gift that we did not create.

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Keep It Simple

We are healed of a suffering only be experiencing it in full. ---Marcel Proust
We must never forget our past. We need to remember the power that our illness has over us. Why? So we can remember how our recovery began. So we can remember we’re not cured. So we can tell our stories.
We must remember how we acted. Why? So we don’t act and think like addicts. Most of us had a poor relationships with friends, family, and ourselves. We need to remember how lonely we felt. That way, we’ll make recovery grow stronger One Day at a Time.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me always remember how my illness almost destroyed me. Help me face the pain of these memories.
Action for the Day: I will talk about my past life with those who support my recovery. I will tell them what it is that I must remember about my past.

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Each Day a New Beginning

. . . as awareness increases, the need for personal secrecy almost proportionately decreases. --Charlotte Painter
We hang onto secrets when we're unsure of ourselves and the role we're asked to play--secrets about our inner thoughts, our dreams and aspirations, our feared inadequacies.
Because we strive for perfection, assume it's achievable, and settle for no less in all our activities, we are haunted by our secret fears of not measuring up. The more committed we become to this program, the greater is our understanding of the fallacy of this way of thinking. And as our awareness increases, the more accepting we become of our human frailty, and the less need we have to cover it up. Our mental health is measurable by the openness we offer to the world. Secrets belie good health and heighten the barriers to it.
The program's Fourth and Fifth Steps are the antidotes to being stuck in an unhealthy state of mind. They push us to let go of our secrets, freeing us from the power they wield. Practicing the principles of the program offers the remedy we need for the happiness we deserve.
I will share a secret today and be free of its power over my life.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

We find that most of this embarrassment is unnecessary. While you need not discuss your husband at length, you can quietly let your friends know the nature of his illness. But you must be on guard not to embarrass or harm your husband.

p. 115

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

After I was released, most of the next few weeks was a blur. One night I caught my husband with another woman. We fought and I followed him in my car and tried to run him down, right in the middle of the main street in town. The incident caused a six-car pileup, and when the law caught up with me later, I was sent to the locked ward again. I do not remember arriving there, and when I woke up, I didn't know where I was . I was tied to a table with restraints around my wrists, both ankles, and my neck. They shot heavy drugs into my veins and kept me like that for a long time. I was released five days later, there was no one there to drive me home, so I hitchhiked. The house was dark and locked, and no one was anywhere around to let me in. I got a bottle and sat in the snow on the back porch and drank.

p. 465

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

But all alcoholics who have drunk themselves out of jobs, family, and friends will need to cross-examine themselves ruthlessly to determine how their own personality defects have thus demolished their security.

pp. 51-52

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A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work.
--Cited in The Best of BITS & PIECES

We all have ability. The difference is how we use it.
--Stevie Wonder

Forgive yourself for your faults and your mistakes and move on.
--Les Brown

It is in the silence of the heart that God speaks.
--Mother Teresa

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who
make our souls blossom.
--Marcel Proust

Gratitude is the heart's memory.
--French proverb

Real thanksgiving is thanks-living.
--unknown

We don't need more to be thankful for, we need to be more thankful.
--unknown

Life's little duties should never come before love. Make time for those you care about.
--unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

OBESITY

"Obesity is really widespread."
-- Joseph O. Kern II

To be fat is to be lost. It is a self-imposed isolation that keeps people sad. The fat is
the result of an addiction to a series of chemicals in food that society finds
acceptable; the disease of bulimia is widespread.

But it can be changed. People can and do get well from a compulsion around food by
surrendering to the reality of their compulsion. The people-pleasing must be seen.
The mask must be removed. The pain in the family must be talked about. Feelings
that have been buried behind the food for years should be expressed. Feelings are to
be felt!

We need not remain fat, and recovery begins when we begin to have hope; we begin to
love ourselves; we begin to believe in ourselves.

O Lord, You hear the prayer of all Your children help me to hear my prayers, too!

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"I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart."
Psalm 9:1

"Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, and into His courts with praise. Be thankful to
him and bless his name."
Psalm 100:4

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Daily Inspiration

Make it your goal to be someone that you would like to spend the rest of your life with. Lord, help me approach my day interested in everything that happens so that my life will truly be an adventure.

Through the power of God within me, I am stronger than any of my circumstances. Lord, I seek, I knock and I ask and You are always there and ready to give me the miracles that I need.

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NA Just For Today

Foundation First

"As we begin to function in society, our creative freedom helps us sort our priorities and do the basic things first."
Basic Text pg. 83

No sooner do we get clean than some of us begin putting other priorities ahead of our recovery. Careers, families, relationships - all these are part of the life we find once we've laid the foundation of our recovery. But we can't build a stable life for ourselves before we do the hard, basic work of laying our recovery foundation. Like a house built on sand, such a life will be shaky, at best.

Before we begin putting all our attention to rebuilding the detailed framework of our lives, we need to lay our foundation. We acknowledge, first, that we don't yet have a foundation, that our addiction has made our lives utterly unmanageable. Then, with the help of our sponsor and our home group, we find faith in a Power strong enough to help us prepare the ground of our new lives. We clear the wreckage from the site upon which we will build our future. Finally, we develop a deep, working familiarity with the principles we will practice in our continuing affairs: honest self-examination, reliance upon our Higher Power's guidance and strength, and service to others.

Once our foundation is prepared, then we can go full steam ahead to put our new lives together. But first we must ask ourselves if our foundation is secure, for without our foundation, nothing we build can stand for long.

Just for today: I will take care to lay a secure foundation for my recovery. Upon such a foundation, I can build for a lifetime in recovery.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances. --Martha Washington
We all have friends who seem happy even though they run into lots of bad luck. And we all know other people who seem grumpy all the time. Nothing makes them happy. It's puzzling, but some people have decided, maybe without even knowing it, that life is fun and should be enjoyed. No bit of bad luck has to make us miserable unless we let it.
A broken bike, a lost math assignment, a rained out picnic are things that might make us miserable. But we can decide they won't. Feeling happy can be a habit -- just like brushing teeth before bedtime.
Will I stop and think today before I let things make me unhappy?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Without heroes, we are all plain people and don't know now far we can go. --Bernard Malamud
It is useful for us to reflect on our heroes for a time. Who do we greatly admire? Are they men or women? Are they closely involved in our lives, or are they distant and beyond our ability to reach on a personal level? Can we feel hopeful and open enough about life to have heroes?
Our heroes inspire us to find the new edges of our growth. We see in another man or woman the qualities and values we admire. We find our own best parts, perhaps partly hidden or undeveloped, in the people we hold as heroes. For example, if we admire a television personality, we can learn about our own values by asking what we admire in him or her. If we admire a friend, we may see a trait we hold dear in ourselves. As we grow and change, our heroes are replaced by others who fit our maturing values.
As I think about people I admire, I learn about myself from them.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
All of the fantasies in your life will never match those I once tried to attain. Now older, it's more important reaching the more realistic goals, and having them come true. --Deidra Sarault
Simply knowing that we are important creatures of the universe offers too little security for most of us. We do have a role to play; our talents are special and unique to each of us. Using them in a well-planned manner will benefit us emotionally and spiritually. Others will profit from our talents as well.
Fantasies have their place in our lives, too. They often tempt us to even greater heights. We can't always collar our fantasies, but we can take the necessary steps to realize the goals that our fantasies have birthed.
Recovery is freeing us to achieve those goals we'd only dreamed of or perhaps feared tackling in the past. The defects that we hid behind before are, with patience, giving way to positive behavior. We can accomplish our heart's pure desires. We need not let the fear of failure trap us again as it did so many of us for so long.
I will set my sights high and trust the program to coach my progress. My goals are attainable. It only takes one small step at a time.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
The Magic of Gratitude and Acceptance
Gratitude and acceptance are two magic tricks available to us in recovery. No matter who we are, where we are, or what we have, gratitude and acceptance work.
We may eventually become so happy that we realize our present circumstances are good. Or we master our present circumstances and then move forward into the next set of circumstances.
If we become stuck, miserable, feeling trapped and hopeless, try gratitude and acceptance. If we have tried unsuccessfully to alter our present circumstances and have begun to feel like we're beating our head against a brick wall, try gratitude and acceptance.
If we feel like all is dark and the night will never end, try gratitude and acceptance.
If we feel scared and uncertain, try gratitude and acceptance.
If we've tried everything else and nothing seems to work, try gratitude and acceptance.
If we've been fighting something, try gratitude and acceptance.
When all else fails, go back to the basics.
Gratitude and acceptance work.
Today, God, help me let go of my resistance. Help me know the pain of a circumstance will stop hurting so much if I accept it. I will practice the basics of gratitude and acceptance in my life, and for all my present circumstances.


Today I am thinking about all the things I have to be grateful for and will write them down. I will make a gratitude list, adding to it every time I think of something new. By doing this I will be more aware of the things I have to be grateful for and will always have something about which I can feel good, no matter what is going on in my life. --Ruth Fishel

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journey to the heart
Open Up to Who You Are

Stop criticizing yourself. Stop telling yourself everything you think, feel, want, and do is wrong. Or at least not quite right. You've been holding back, censoring yourself for too long. Your creativity, your intuition, the voice of your soul is the very voice you've been silencing.

For many reasons, we learn to criticze and censor ourselves. We may have grown up with people who stifled our inner voice, our wisdom, our knowledge of truth. Our sense of the truth may have caused them to feel uneasy. So they told us to hush. It met their needs to keep us quiet. So we learned to hush ourselves. It was how we survived.

No longer do we need to meet other people's needs, not that way. We don't have to be afraid of ourselves or what we will find if we look inside. We don't need to run from ourselves. We don't need to hide or hush ourselves. We are creative, loving, purposeful beings.

It's time to open up to yourself, to your grandest dreams and aspirations, your real inclinations and desires, your wisdom and knowledge about what is true and what is real. Open up to who you are. Listen to yourself. Express yourself. Enjoy who you are, and you will find others emjoying you,too.

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more language of letting go
Practice the basics

Not being codependent? That's a decision I need to make each day.
--Anonymous

Remember to practice the basics.

There's a saying floating around that people talk about a lot: Lessons won't go away until they're learned. We can move, duck, hide, run, or escape by doing something else, but that lesson will still follow us around.

There's another saying,too, that's not talked about as much. But it's an important lesson to remember as we go through our daily lives: Just because the lesson has been learned doesn't mean it will go away. Sometimes it appears in different shapes and forms.

I used to believe that once a lesson was learned, I had it under my belt. The pain from that lesson would stop once I realized what it was. Then I could just go on with my life and put that graduation certificate in a drawer.

It took me a while to realize that that wasn't necessarily true. I was learning these lessons because I would need to use that skill, awakening, value, discipline, or practice as a tool for the rest of my life.

If you've got some important life lessons under your belt, congratulations. But don't put that certificate away quite yet. Instead, why don't you leave it out in plain sight?

When I first began skydiving, the first fifty jumps or so were dedicated to basic training. I was learning to save my life. After that, I began to add new skills to my repertoire. I was able to move my body around and have some fun in the air, I began to learn to fly. But each time I get to the door of the plane and get ready to jump, it's important to remember everything I learned in the beginning-- the basics-- about how to save my life.

Practice the basics every day or as often as you need. Whether you're in recovery, working at a craft, working on a relationship, or flying a plane, review your basics and remember to apply these principles each day in your life.

Spread your wings. Learn to fly. Have a ball with your life. Learn about all the mystery and magic the universe has to offer. See how good you can get. But don't forget what you learned in the beginning.

Remember to save your own life.

God, help me remember to practice the basics of self-care every day of my life.

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Fully Committed to Now
Why We Are Not Shown the Big Picture by Madisyn Taylor

Often we want to be shown the big picture but it is not always in our best interest as we can easily become overwhelmed.

Sometimes, we may find ourselves wishing we knew what our lives are going to look like or what gifts and challenges are going to be presented to us in the coming months or years. We may want to know if the relationship we’re in now will go the distance or if our goals will be realized. Perhaps we feel like we need help making a decision and we want to know which choice will work out best. We may consult psychics, tarot cards, our dreams, and many other sources in the hopes of finding out what the future holds. Usually, at most, we may catch glimpses. And even though we think we would like to know the whole story in all its details, the truth is that we would probably be overwhelmed and exhausted if we knew everything that is going to happen to us.

Just think of your life as you’ve lived it up to this point. If you are like most of us, you have probably done more and faced more than you could have ever imagined. If someone had told you as a child of all the jobs and relationships you would experience, along with each one’s inherent ups and downs, you would have become overwhelmed. With your head full of information about the future, you would have had a very hard time experiencing your life in the present moment, which is where everything actually happens.

In many ways, not knowing what the future has in store brings out in us the qualities we need to grow. For example, it would have been difficult to commit yourself to certain people or projects if you knew they wouldn’t ultimately work out. Yet, it was through your commitment to see them through that you experienced the lessons you needed to grow. Looking back on your life, you would likely be hard pressed to say that anything in your past should not have happened. In fact, your most challenging experiences with their inevitable lessons may have ultimately brought you the greatest rewards. Not knowing the future keeps us just where we need to be—fully committed and in the present moment. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
"We succeed in enterprises which demand the positive qualities we possess," wrote de Tocqueville, "but we excel in those which can also make use of our defects." We learn in The Program that our defects do have value - to the extent that we use them as the starting point for change and the pathway to better things. Fear can be a stepping stone to prudence, for example, as well as to respect for others. Fear can also help us turn away from hate and toward understanding. In the same way, pride can lead us toward the road of humility.

Am I aware of my direction today? Do I care where I'm going?

Today I Pray
I pray that my Higher Power will show me how to use my defects in a positive way, because nothing - not even fear or selfishness or greed - is all bad. May I trust that every quality that leads me into trouble has a reverse side that can lead me out. Pride, for instance, can't puff itself up unduly without bursting and demonstrating that it is, in essence, only hot air. May I learn from my weaknesses.

Today I Will Remember
Good news out of bad.

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One More Day

“Just pray for a thick skin and a tender heart.”
–Ruth Graham

There are times when we become angry or hurt or disappointed by the words or actions of our friends. When we react in any of these ways, we are focusing on them instead of us. “He hurt my feelings,” we might say, or “she made me angry.” These statements point out the error in our reasoning. No one can “make” us feel a certain way.

Our lives are happier and our emotions more even when we realize we are choosing our reactions. “I let myself be angry (or hurt or disappointed).” Knowing this, gives us a choice in how we let others affect us. We can be less sensitive to real or imagined wrongs. Instead, we can use our sensitivity to understand the pain of others.

I will be more loving towards my friends by overlooking their flaws and underlining their strengths.

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Food For Thought

Depression

All of us go through times of depression. When we were overeating, we may have felt depressed almost continually. We find that abstinence and the OA program lift us out of depression. The outward circumstances of life may not change radically, but by means of our program we experience more inner joy and contentment and less gloom and despair.

When we do feel depressed, we can take positive action. We can work on a specific step. We can make a phone call. We can offer to help someone else. Focusing our attention on someone or something outside of ourselves is an effective means of combating depression.

Maintaining abstinence does not ensure that we will never again feel depressed. In general, however, our spirits do not sink as low as they did before and they do not stay down as long. As we improve our contact with our Higher Power, we find ourselves less and less despondent. We have new hope, faith, and love - all-powerful antidotes to depression.

Thank You for lifting me out of depression.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ FAMILY ~
Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family:
Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.
Jane Howard
(from the book "The Simple Abundance Journal of
Gratitude" by Sarah Ban Breathnach)

As an only child of parents who immigrated and left their own families behind, I have always felt that I was missing out on the great wealth of sharing and caring that I saw other people have in their families. That was before recovery.

Today, I have an extended family -- not only by marriage -- but by the simple fact that my Higher Power led me to the great wealth of caring and sharing that I have found in perhaps the strangest place of all -- cyberspace -- in the form of online recovery loops.

Being prone to isolation, my disease first led me to seek out others who have struggled with compulsive overeating, and that, in turn, led me to my new 'family.' As someone so wonderfully expressed it to me recently, it's a "family of choice." What a concept! My family of choice not only has sisters and brothers, it also is filled with mothers and fathers, aunts and uncles -- more than I could ever have dreamed of before, and each brings into my life more experience, strength and hope than I could ever have imagined.

One Day at a Time . . .
I thank God that I have found this huge, loving family that constantly offers me hope, inspiration, understanding ... and most of all love.
Lorraine

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Selfishness - self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt. - Pg. 62 - How It Works

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

The natural anger, fear, and sadness that accompanies your life during early recovery can cause confusion, short temperedness, and a tendency to neglect your own needs. Allow yourself the luxury of leaning on family and friends, sponsors and counselors to make decisions, offer their advice, and give you gentle reminders of what needs to be done.

As I stay clean, may I learn to lean on family and friends, sponsors and counselors.

Friendship

Today, I make choices about my company and friends. Whom I choose to spend time with is very important to me, and the relationships that I begin I wish to respect and nurture. A handful of dear friends is far more meaningful to me than lots of acquaintances. I choose to share myself where I feel a return of good feeling. I want both to have a friend and to be a friend. One of the unusual gifts of growing up in a dysfunctional household was that I learned the value of friendship because I had to turn to my friends to meet very deep needs. I am grateful for my friends, and for what I learned and felt from them.

I value friendship.
- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Reputation: what others are not thinking about you.

What others think about me is never as important as what I think about them.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

For peace of mind, resign as general manager of the universe.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I refuse to allow the magnetic tape of self-pity to trap me. Today I avoid negative thinking and replace it as soon as I notice it is present in me.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I was waking up with someone I didn't like - and I was sleeping alone. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

November 23

Daily Reflections

HOLD YOUR FACE TO THE LIGHT

Believe more deeply. Hold your face up to the
Light, even though for the moment you do not see.
AS BILL SEES IT, p. 3

One Sunday in October, during my morning meditation,
I glanced out the window at the ash tree in our
front yard. At once I was overwhelmed by its
magnificent, golden color! As I stared in awe at
God's work of art, the leaves began to fall and,
within minutes, the branches were bare. Sadness
came over me as I thought of the winter months
ahead, but just as I was reflecting on autumn's
annual process, God's message came through. Like
the trees, stripped of their leaves in the fall,
sprout new blossoms in the spring, I had had my
compulsive, selfish ways removed by God in order
for me to blossom into a sober, joyful member of
A.A. Thank you, God, for the changing seasons and
for my ever-changing life.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I no longer refuse to do anything because I cannot
do it to perfection. Many of us alcoholics use the
excuse of not being able to do something perfectly
to enable us to do nothing at all. We pretend to be
perfectionists. We are good at telling people how a
thing should be done, but when we come to the effort
of doing it ourselves, we balk. We say to ourselves:
I might make a mistake, so I'd better let the whole
thing slide. In A.A. we set our goals high, but that
does not prevent us from trying. The mere fact that
we will never fully reach these goals does not
prevent us from doing the best we can. Have I stopped
hiding behind the smoke-screen of perfectionism?

Meditation For The Day

"In the world ye shall have tribulation. But be of
good cheer. I have overcome the world." Keep an
undaunted spirit. Keep your spirit free and unconquered.
You can be undefeated and untouched by failure and all
its power, by letting your spirit overcome the world;
rise above the earth's turmoil into the secret chamber
of perfect peace and confidence. When a challenge comes
to you, remember that you have God's help and nothing
can wholly defeat you.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have confidence and be of good cheer.
I pray that I may not fear the power of failure.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Humility Brings Hope, p. 325

Now that we no longer patronize bars and bordellos, now that we bring
home the pay checks, now that we are so very active in A.A., and now
that people congratulate us on these signs of progress--well, we
naturally proceed to congratulate ourselves. Of course, we are not
yet within hailing distance of humility.

<< << << >> >> >>

We ought to be willing to try humility in seeking the removal of our
other shortcomings, just as we did when we admitted that we were
powerless over alcohol, and came to believe that a Power greater than
ourselves could restore us to sanity.

If humility could enable us to find the grace by which the deadly
alcohol obsession could be banished, then there must be hope of the
same result respecting any other problem we can possibly have.

1. Grapevine, June 1961
2. 12 & 12, p. 76

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

The only reason to drink
Staying sober
"There's only one real reason I can ever have for taking a drink, and that's because I want to."
This remark at a meeting sums up AA's position on why we drink. We never really drink because of pressures and troubles. We drink because we want to, because we feel like taking a drink.
It's true that a serious crisis, like going into bankruptcy, may make us conscious of an urger to drink. But we know that we're also likely to have such urges in the face of good fortune. The alcoholic who would drink over a bankruptcy would also probably get drunk if he or she won the lottery.
By refusing to accept all of these alleged "reasons" for drinking, AA simplified our problem so we can deal with it. We either want to drink or we don't want to drink, period. Even if we want to drink... and some members do.. AA can show us how to stay sober and eventually lose such desires.
Nothing has the power to make me drink today. It is only my own willingness that can destroy my sobriety.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Let me listen to me and not to them. ---Gertrude Stein
Often we try to please everyone around us. But this may not make us happy, and so we get angry.
We feel taken advantage of.
We may be kind to others, but first we must love ourselves. How? By learning to listen to ourselves. To our dreams. To our higher power. By doing this we’ll be more happy. And those around us will probably be more happy too.
As our AA medallions say, “To Thine Own Self Be True.”
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I’ll listen to that gentle, loving voice inside me. Higher Power, help me make me make my “conscious contact” with You better.
Action for the Day: I will write down why I need to be true to myself.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

When you send out real love, real love will return to you. --Florence Scovel Shinn
Real love is selfless love. It expects nothing in return. It is not conditional. It doesn't keep score. It is too seldom given. Many of us came into the program hurting, feeling unloved, looking desperately for love, unable to love selflessly. But we are learning.
We are climbing the same mountain, all of us. Our particular paths will cross the paths of many others before reaching the top, where we will find full enlightenment. And any path we cross has a special contribution to make to our own progress. We can be grateful for all intersecting paths, no matter how adverse they seem at the time. We can offer all our fellow-travelers real love, and our own trip will benefit manyfold.
We need not be ashamed of our desire for love. Nor need we feel shame that we've bargained for it. But we do need to understand that the kind of love we seek can only be gained when we quit searching for it and simply offer it to all the people in our midst.
I will look into the hearts of all the people I encounter today and offer them love. I'll receive that which I give.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

When you have carefully explained to such people that he is a sick person, you will have created a new atmosphere. Barriers which have sprung up between you and your friends will disappear with the growth of sympathetic understanding. You will no longer be self-conscious or feel that you must apologize as though your husband were a weak character. He may be anything but that. Your new courage, good nature and lack of self-consciousness will do wonders for you socially.

p. 115

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

One day I decided I'd better go to the laundromat and wash some clothes. There was a woman there with a couple of kids. She moved around quickly, folding clothes and stacking them neatly in a couple of huge baskets. Where did she get her eneergy? Suddenly I realized I had to put my clothes into the dryers. I couldn't remember which washers I had put them. I looked into probably twenty different washers. I made up my mind how to handle the situation. I would stay there until everyone else had left. I would keep whatever clothes were left behind, as well as my own. As the other woman finsihed her tasks, she was writing something down on a small piece of paper. She loaded her baskets and kids into her car, and came back into the laundromat. She came right up to me and handed me the small blue paper. I couldn't make out what it said. I smiled politely and slurred a friendly "Thank you." Later I made out the telephone number and handwritten message below: "If you ever want to stop drinking, call Alcohol Anonymous, 24 hours a day."

p. 465-466

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

The most common symptoms of emotional insecurity are worry, anger, self-pity, and depression. These stem from causes which sometimes seem to be within us, and at other times to come from without. To take inventory in this respect we ought to consider carefully all personal relationships which bring continuous or recurring trouble. It should be remembered that this kind of insecurity may arise in any area where instincts are threatened. Questioning directed to this end might run like this: Looking at both past and present, what sex situations have caused me anxiety, bitterness, frustration, or depression? Appraising each situation fairly, can I see where I have been at fault? Did these perplexities beset me because of selfishness or unreasonable demands? Or, if my disturbance was seemingly caused by the behavior of others, why do I lack the ability to accept conditions I cannot change? These are the sort of fundamental inquiries that can disclose the source of my discomfort and indicate whether I may be able to alter my own conduct and so adjust myself serenely to self-discipline.

p. 52

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Silence is also a form of speech.
--West Africa Proverb

Each day comes bearing its own gifts.
Untie the ribbons.
--Ruth Ann Schabacker

Gratitude is our most direct line to God and the angels. If we take the time, no matter
how crazy and troubled we feel, we can find something to be thankful for. The more we
seek gratitude, the more reason the angels will give us for gratitude and joy to exist in
our lives.
--Terry Lynn Taylor

"Our personal dispositions are as windowpanes through which we see the world either as
rosy or dull. The way we color the glasses we wear is the way the world seems to us."
--Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

"Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you,
knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better
than your current situation."
--Brian Tracy

You will get nothing out of life unless you make the decision to go after it. Persistence is
the key to winning.
--unknown

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

MEMORIES

"History is the seed bed of the
future."
-- Leo Booth

I talk about my drinking history, remembering the incidents and losses, because I
believe "there is no gain without pain." To enjoy my sobriety I must share, on a
daily basis, the reality of my disease. My pain is rooted in my history. I must live with
my disease on a daily basis. I need to be aware of the disease process in my life.

This awareness requires a "rigorously honest" inventory of my past attitudes and
behaviors; ignorance is bliss for the disease of addiction! The acceptance and
awareness of my past is my treatment for today. The more I understand about my
yesterdays the better my recovery will be today. My life has a history and my spiritual
program demands that I understand it.

Teach me to face my past so that I can realistically live in my today.

************************************************** *********

"The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him."
Lamentations 3:25

"And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus,
giving thanks to God the Father through him."
Colossians 3:17

And the Holy Spirit helps us in our distress. For we don't even know what we should pray
for, nor how we should pray. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot
be expressed in words. And the Father who knows all hearts knows what the Spirit is
saying, for the Spirit pleads for us believers in harmony with God's own will.
Romans 8:26 -27

Fools think they need no advice, but the wise listen to others. A fool is quick-tempered,
but a wise person stays calm when insulted. An honest witness tells the truth; a false
witness tells lies. Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring
healing. Truth stands the test of time; lies are soon exposed. Deceit fills hearts that are
plotting evil; joy fills hearts that are planning peace!
Proverbs 12:15-20

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

One of life's greatest pleasures is meeting and conquering our most difficult moments. Lord, teach me to trust myself and trust that You will never abandon me or my needs.

See opportunity in your difficulties, not difficulty in your opportunities. Lord, I will focus on the goodness today brings to me and look for the many reasons I have to feel joy.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

God's Will

"The relief of 'letting go and letting God' helps us develop a life that is worth living."
Basic Text pg. 26

In our addiction, we were afraid of what might happen if we didn't control everything around us. Many of us made up elaborate lies to protect our use of drugs. Some of us manipulated everyone around us in a frenzied attempt to get something from them so we could use more drugs. A few of us went to great lengths to keep two people from talking to each other and perhaps discovering our trail of lies. We took pains to maintain an illusion of control over our addiction and our lives. In the process, we kept ourselves from experiencing the serenity that comes with surrender to a Higher Power's will.

In our recovery, it is important to release our illusion of control and surrender to a Higher Power, whose will for us is better than anything we can con, manipulate, or devise for ourselves. If we realize that we are trying to control outcomes and are feeling afraid of the future, there is action we can take to reverse that trend. We go to our Second and Third Steps and look at what we have come to believe about a Higher Power. Do we truly believe that this Power can care for us and restore us to sanity? If so, we can live with all of life's ups and downs - its disappointments, its sorrows, its wonders, and its joys.

Just for today: I will surrender and let a Higher Power's will happen in my life. I will accept the gift of serenity this surrender brings.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Happiness is not a place to travel to. It's a way of getting there. --Anonymous
Those of us who climb mountains find joy in reaching the top. However, the climb would not make much sense if there were not things to enjoy on the way up. If we groan and complain, it will be hard to feel joy at the summit. However, if we are able to enjoy each day's journey, it makes all the difference in the world. In the midst of each chore, we can notice the sunset or the unique and beautiful surroundings of each day.
Each of our days is different. Happiness is not a goal we are struggling to reach some time in the future. It is a gift we can give ourselves today. If we enjoy some parts of each day of our hike, we will also feel joy at the summit.
What form will my gift of happiness take today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
We shall not cease from exploration.
And at the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time
---T. S. Eliot
Our spiritual path is like a search leading home. We carry within us a yearning for the ideal, the perfect acceptance and love from our fathers and mothers. We long for fulfillment of our dreams, we long to feel strong and capable, and we want to understand, to truly come into our own.
As we peel back the layers of our defenses, we find what we knew all along. On a deep level, we knew no man could be totally self-sufficient. Now we are coming back to it as if it's brand new. The best images of our parents' love and acceptance of us are what we return to as models for how we can be. It is true we can never go home again. Yet our spiritual journey mysteriously leads us back to explore what we knew deeply all along.
I will make peace with my past and explore the deeper knowledge I've always held within me.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
When you send out real love, real love will return to you. --Florence Scovel Shinn
Real love is selfless love. It expects nothing in return. It is not conditional. It doesn't keep score. It is too seldom given. Many of us came into the program hurting, feeling unloved, looking desperately for love, unable to love selflessly. But we are learning.
We are climbing the same mountain, all of us. Our particular paths will cross the paths of many others before reaching the top, where we will find full enlightenment. And any path we cross has a special contribution to make to our own progress. We can be grateful for all intersecting paths, no matter how adverse they seem at the time. We can offer all our fellow-travelers real love, and our own trip will benefit manyfold.
We need not be ashamed of our desire for love. Nor need we feel shame that we've bargained for it. But we do need to understand that the kind of love we seek can only be gained when we quit searching for it and simply offer it to all the people in our midst.
I will look into the hearts of all the people I encounter today and offer them love. I'll receive that which I give.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Healthy Sexuality
Many areas of our life need healing.
One important part of our life is our sexuality. Our feelings and beliefs about our sexuality, our ability to nurture, cherish, and enjoy our sexuality, our ability to respect ourselves sexually, our ability to let go of sexual shame and confusion, may all be impaired or confused by our codependency.
Our sexual energy may be blocked. Or for some of us, sex may be the only way we learned to connect with people. Our sexuality may not be connected to the rest of us; sex may not be connected to love - for others or ourselves.
Some of us were sexually abused as children. Some of us may have gotten involved in sexuality addictive behaviors - compulsive sexual behaviors that got out of control and produced shame.
Some of us may have gotten involved in sexual codependency: not paying attention to what we wanted, or didn't want, sexually; allowing ourselves to get involved sexually because it was what the other person wanted; shutting off our sexuality along with our other feelings; denying ourselves healthy enjoyment of ourselves as sexual beings.
Our sexuality is a part of ourselves that deserves healing attention and energy. It is a part of us that we can allow to become connected to the whole of us; it is a part of us that we can stop being ashamed of.
It is okay and healthy to allow our sexual energy to open up and become healed. It is connected to our creativity and to our heart. We do not have to allow our sexual energy to control our relationships or us. We can establish and maintain healthy, appropriate boundaries around our sexuality. We can discover what that means in our life.
We can enjoy the gift of being human beings who have been given the gift of sexual energy, without abusing or discounting that gift.
Today, I will begin to integrate my sexuality into the rest of my personality. God, help me let go of my fears and shame around my sexuality. Show me the issues I need to face concerning my sexuality. Help me open myself to healing in that area of my life.


It feels so good to like myself today. It feels so good to accept myself today. It feels so good to know that I am exactly where I need to be, doing what is right for me in this day. --Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

Open Up to Who You Are

Stop criticizing yourself. Stop telling yourself everything you think, feel, want and do is wrong. Or at least not quite right. You’ve been holding back, censoring yourself for too long. Your creativity, your intuition, the voice of your soul is the very voice you’ve been silencing.

For many reasons, we learn to criticize and censor ourelves. We may have grown up with people who stifled our inner voice, our wisdom, our knowledge of truth. Our sense of the truth may have caused them to feel uneasy. So they told us to hush. It met their needs to keep us quiet. So we learned to hush ourselves. It was how we survived.

No longer do we need to meet other people’s needs, not that way. We don’t have to be afraid of ourselves or what we will find if we look inside. We don’t need to run from ourselves. We don’t need to hide or hush ourselves. We are creative, loving, purposeful beings.

It’s time to open up to yourself, to your grandest dreams and aspirations, your real inclinations and desires, your wisdom and knowledge about what is true and what is real. Open up to who you are. Listen to yourself. Express yourself. Enjoy who you are, and you will find others enjoying you,too.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Practice the basics

Not being codependent? That’s a decision I need to make each day.
–Anonymous

Remember to practice the basics.

There’s a saying floating around that people talk about a lot: Lessons won’t go away until they’re learned. We can move, duck, hide, run, or escape by doing something else, but that lesson will still follow us around.

There’s another saying,too, one that’s not talked about as much. But it’s an important lesson to remember as we go through our daily lives: Just because the lesson has been learned doesn’t mean it will go away. Sometimes it appears in different shapes and forms.

I used to believe that once a lesson was learned, I had it under my belt. The pain from that lesson would stop once I realized what it was. Then I could just go on with my life and put that graduation certificate in a drawer.

It took me a while to realize that that wasn’t necessarily true. I was learning these lessons because I would need to use that skill, awakening, value, descipline, or practice as a tool for the rest of my life.

If you’ve got some important life lessons under your belt, congratulations. But don’t put that certificate away quite yet. Instead, why don’t you leave it out in plain sight?

When I first began skydiving, the first fifty jumps or so were dedicated to basic training. I was learning to save my life. After that, I began to add new skills to my repertoire. I was able to move my body around and have some fun in the air. I began to learn to fly. But each time I get to the door of the plane and get ready to jump, it’s important to remember everything I learned in the beginning– the basics– about how to save my life.

Practice the basics every day or as often as you need. Whether you’re in recovery, working at a craft, working on a relationship, or flying a plane, review your basics and remember to apply these principles each day in your life.

Spread your wings. Learn to fly. Have a ball with your life. Learn about all the mystery and magic the universe has to offer. See how good you can get. But don’t forget what you learned in the beginning.

Remember to save your own life.

God, help me remember to practice the basics of self-care every day of my life.

*****

Bird Meditation
Witnessing Nature through Meditation by Madisyn Taylor

When it becomes too cold to be outside with nature, bring her inside through your meditation.

When the weather gets colder it can be more difficult to get in touch with the marvel of nature as it exists around us. Finding innovative ways to really connect with nature brings us closer to the wonders that envelop our lives. One way to do this is to perform a meditation with our feathered friends, the bird kingdom.

Just by taking a few moments each day to watch the bird activity that goes on in our backyards through our windows can bring a sense of calm and well-being to our lives. Watching and being with the birds that we share our garden space with us allows us to experience greater feelings of relaxation and gratitude for the diversity that is always present around us. Simply watching, without judgment or expectations, heightens our awareness of the beauty of nature. If you watch the birds for a long enough period of time you will begin to feel a great sense of deep joy within you knowing we are all truly divine. Doing this with our family members will in turn introduce a meditative practice that can easily be shared and appreciated by all, as well as create deeper bonds with each other through the joy of experiencing the healing power of nature.

Looking through our windows and placing a feeder and bird bath in our gardens to attract the birds is a way to call forth beauty into our lives. As we consciously connect with our outer world—even when the weather inhibits us from physically being in it—we see that the splendor we view outside of our windows is simply a reflection of what lies within us. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“We succeed in enterprises which demand the positive qualities we possess,” wrote de Tocqueville, “but we excel in those which can also make use of our defects.” We learn in The Program that our defects do have value — to the extent that we use them as the starting point for change and the pathway to better things. Fear can be a stepping stone to prudence, for example, as well as to respect for others. Fear can also help us turn away from hate and toward understanding. In the same way, pride can lead us toward the road of humility. Am I aware of my direction today? Do I care where I’m going?

Today I Pray

I pray that my Higher Power will show me how to use my defects in a positive way, because nothing — not even fear or selfishness or greed — is all bad. May I trust that every quality that leads me into trouble has a reverse side that can lead me out. Pride, for instance, can’t puff itself up unduly without bursting and demonstrating that it is, in essence, only hot air. May I learn from my weaknesses.

Today I Will Remember

Good news out of bad.

*************************************

One More Day

Just pray for a thick skin and a tender heart.
– Ruth Graham

There are times when we become angry or hurt or disappointed by the words or actions of our friends. When we react in any of these ways, we are focusing on them instead of us. “He hurt my feelings.” we might say, or “She made me angry.” These statement point out the error in our reasoning. No one can “make” us feel a certain way.

Our lives are happier and our emotions more even when we realize we are choosing our reactions. “I let myself be angry (or hurt or disappointed).” Knowing this, gives us a choice in how we let others affect us. We can be less sensitive to real or imagined wrongs. Instead, we can use our sensitivity to understand the pain of others.

I will be more loving toward my friends by overlooking their flaws and underlining their strengths.

************************************

Food For Thought

Turning On

Before OA, many of us were in a self-centered rut. We had little enthusiasm for anything except food, and food proved to be a false friend. When we come to OA and admit that we are powerless over food, we can turn on to a Power greater than ourselves.

Just as we do not need to understand the complexities of electricity in order to benefit from it, we do not need to understand everything about God in order to receive His power. Taking the Twelve Steps turns us on to a new way of life, motivated by faith in a Higher Power.

Turning on to this Power means that we are no longer alone. We do not have to try to run our lives by ourselves. God can and will relieve us of our obsession with food and our obsession with self. He gives us strength and enthusiasm for the living of our daily lives. Through surrender, we become recipients of the Power of the universe.

Take away the blindness that prevents us from turning on to Your Power.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Successful Recovery ~
I always remember an epitaph which is in the cemetery
at Tombstone, Arizona. It says: 'Here lies Jack
Williams. He done his damnedest.' I think that is
the greatest epitaph a man can have.
Harry S. Truman

No matter what their drug of choice, compulsives all have one thing in common. If we don't practice our program, we run the risk of relapsing back into the disease.

What separates those who find recovery and those who don't is this: those who don't find recovery slip and fall, and don't get up again. They figure, "I've already relapsed, so why not just continue using my drug of choice? Why not wallow in my disease?"

Those who recover are like Jack Williams...they do their damnedest. They continue to read program literature, they continue to do service, they continue to reach out to others and to their Higher Power. The winners in this program don't wallow...they pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and keep on keeping on.

One day at a time... . . .
I will do my damnedest. I will work my program to the best of my ability, and if I fall, I won't stay down.
Jeff

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction. I admitted for the first time that of myself I was nothing; that without Him I was lost. I ruthlessly faced my sins and became willing to have my new-found Friend take them away, root and branch. I have not had a drink since. - Pg. 13 - Bill's Story

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Are we remembering the so-called 'good times' right now? How nice a 'high' would be? We use this hour to REALLY think about what got us to this fight for sobriety. It wasn't because we were having a lot of fun!

Help me to think a drink and drug all the way through, not just the high but the hell it leads to.

Inside My Mind

Today, I am grateful to feel alive and to recognize that life is a spiritual journey. All my life circumstances are spiritual challenges, if I choose to look at them that way. Getting free of my own over-attachment to people, places, things and ideas, mistaking them for me, releases my spirit. Once my spirit is released, it can travel and experience the real beauty of life. Life surrounds me; it is inside, outside and everywhere. If I am free and still inside, life is there. If I am not ruminating and filling my mind with unnecessary preoccupations - life is there, spirit is there - waiting to be seen and felt.

I allow my mind its freedom.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

'Imagine if at every moment we each embraced the world as the gift it is: An apple is a gift; the color pink is a gift; the blue sky is a gift; the scent of honeysuckle is a gift. Hidden in every experience is a gift,' ~Marcia Prager, The Path of Blessing: Experiencing the Energy and Abundance of the Divine

What is my gift right now?

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

When you feel your worst, try your best.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

It feels so good to like myself today. It feels so good to accept myself today. It feels so good to know that I am exactly where I need to be, doing what is right for me in this day.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I spent fifteen years out there looking for my girlfriend. Then I came to the program and got sober, and I went home one day and I found her; She was my wife. And ain't that the story of the alcoholic? I spent all that time looking for something I had all along. - Norm A.

[bluidkiti]

November 24

Daily Reflections

A UNIVERSAL SEARCH

Be quick to see where religious people are right.
Make use of what they offer.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 87

I do not claim to have all the answers in spiritual
matters, any more than I claim to have all the
answers about alcoholism. There are others who are
also engaged in a spiritual search. If I keep an
open mind about what others have to say, I have much
to gain. My sobriety is greatly enriched, and my
practice of the Eleventh Step more fruitful, when I
use both the literature and practices of my
Judeo-Christian tradition, and the resources of other
religions. Thus, I receive support from many sources
in staying away from the first drink.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Instead of being pretended perfectionists, in A.A. we
are content if we are making progress. The main thing
is to be growing. We realize that perfectionism is
only a result of false pride and an excuse to save our
faces. In A.A. we are willing to make mistakes and to
stumble, provided we are always stumbling forward. We
are not so interested in what we are as in what we are
becoming. We are on the way, not at the goal. And we
will be on the way as long as we live. No A.A. has ever
"arrived." But we are getting better. Am I making
progress?

Meditation For The Day

Each new day brings an opportunity to do some little
thing that will help to make a better world, that will
bring God's kingdom a little nearer to being realized
on earth. Take each day's happenings as opportunities
for something you can do for God. In that spirit, a
blessing will attend all that you do. Offering this
day's service to God, you are sharing in His work. You
do not have to do great things.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that today I may do the next thing, the unselfish thing,
the loving thing. I pray that I may be content with doing
small things as long as they are right.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Welcome Criticism, p. 326

"Thanks much for your letter of criticism: I'm certain that had it not
been for its strong critics, A.A. would have made slower progress.

"For myself, I have come to set a high value on the people who have
criticized me, whether they have seemed reasonable critics or
unreasonable ones. Both have often restrained me from doing much
worse than I actually have done. The unreasonable ones have taught
me, I hope, a little patience. But the reasonable ones have always
done a great job for all of A.A. and have taught me many a valuable
lesson."

Letter, 1955

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Are there better paths to sobriety?
Self-honesty
Now that alcoholism recovery has been well established, alternatives to the AA program are being developed. These are designed to appeal to those who either will not or cannot accept AA.
Nobody in AA should feel threatened by these new programs. We should, in fact, be delighted if ways are found to reach those whom we are unable to help. The need is so great that we should welcome anything that helps alcoholics.
The only real test for any program is that it works. More important, it must work for us. No program is useful to us if we cannot apply it in our own lives.
If we have found sobriety in AA, we have no need to look further. If AA was able to help us in our hour of desperate need, it can help us as the days unfold into the future.
I'll be thankful today for the sobriety AA has given me. I'll also remember that my need for help in maintaining sobriety will never end.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Freedom is not enough.---Lyndon B. Johnson
We are free of alcohol and other drugs. We’ve been given a second chance or third chance.
For that, we thank our Higher Power. We’ve started a new life. But to keep this life, we need to change. We need new friends. We need to let a Higher Power guide our hearts, minds, and bodies. We need new friends. We need to let a Higher Power guide our hearts, and bodies. We need to learn new values and how to stand up for them. We need to learn how to give and receive.
Freedom from dependence is not enough. We also want to be happy, and to do something with our lives. So each day we keep learning, we keep growing. Each day without alcohol or other drugs is a gift, a gift from God.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You set me free. Now teach me to stay free. Guide me, for keeping my freedom is a big task
Action for the Day: I will meditate on my freedom. I will take time to list all the ways I am now free.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

"If onlys" are lonely. --Morgan Jennings
The circumstances of our lives seldom live up to our expectations or desires. However, in each circumstance we are offered an opportunity for growth or change, a chance for greater understanding of life's heights and pitfalls. Each time we choose to lament what isn't, we close the door on the invitation to a better existence.
We simply don't know just what's best for us. Our vision is limited. Less so today than yesterday, but limited still. The experiences we are offered will fail to satisfy our expectations because we expect so much less than God has planned for us in the days ahead.
We get what we need, in the way of relationships, adventures, joys and sorrows, today and every day. Celebrating what we get and knowing there is good in it eases whatever trial we are undergoing. We are cared for, right now. We need not lament what we think we need. We do have what we need. We will always get what we need, when we need it.
I will breathe deeply and relax. At this moment my every need is being attended to. My life is unfolding exactly as it should.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

The same principle applies in dealing with the children. Unless they actually need protection from their father, it is best not to take sides in any argument he has with them while drinking. Use your energies to promote a better understanding all around. Then that terrible tension which grips the home of every problem drinker will be lessened.

p. 115

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

Why had she given me this, and what made her think I was drinking? Couldn't she see that my bottle was soda? Of all the nerve! I was mortified! I folded the paper neatly and put it in the back pocket of my jeans. As the next few weeks passed, I became sicker by the day. One morning I woke up alone as usual. I hadn't seen my husband in a long time. I needed a drink, and the bottle on the bedside table was dry. I rose on my shaky legs, but they refused to hold my weight. I fell to the floor and began crawling around the house looking for a bottle. Nothing! This meant I had to leave the house and get to a store.

p. 466

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

Suppose that financial insecurity constantly arouses these same feelings. I can ask myself to what extent have my own mistakes fed my gnawing anxieties. And if the actions of others are part of the cause, what can I do about that? If I am unable to change the present state of affairs, am I willing to take the measures necessary to shape my life to conditions as they are? Questions like these, more of which will come to mind easily in each individual case, will help turn up the root causes.

pp. 52-53

************************************************** *********

You cannot do a kindness too soon, because you never know how soon it will be too late.
--Cited in The Best of BITS & PIECES

A light heart lives long.
--Irish Proverb

People are like stained glass windows: they sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but
when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light within.
--Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness.
--Marguerite Gardiner Blessington

Seven days without a meeting makes one weak.
--unknown

It takes only a moment to be kind, but the result can last a lifetime.
--unknown

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

SHAME

"If we are not ashamed to think
it, we should not be ashamed to
say it."
-- Marcus Tullius Cicero

I was afraid to tell you what I was thinking. I was afraid to speak or be noticed. I sat for
hours silent and at times I wished I could vanish into the furniture. I was afraid of my
shadow.

This reveals not only my lack of confidence but my low self-esteem. I did not think I
had anything to say, anything to offer, anything that might be considered interesting.
I would laugh at stupid things to please people.

Today I speak out. I do not hide what I am thinking. I believe I have something to
offer in the celebration of life. And it feels good. My spiritual growth is proportionate
to my willingness to let you know who I am and what I think.

I celebrate my joy in living by sharing it.

************************************************** *********

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or rude. Love
does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong,
but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things. Love never ends...
I Corinthians 13

"Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory
to your Father in heaven."
Matthew 5:16

"For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through
all generations."
Psalm 100:5

"Walk in love, as Christ also has loved us."
Ephesians 5:2

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

Much time is spent fearing that which isn't really there in the first place. Lord, help me conquer my fears and overcome my difficulties as they happen rather than giving up and letting my difficulties overcome me.

Our thoughts have a powerful effect on our bodies. Lord, may my thoughts be wholesome and loving and bear good results on me and my life.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Gratefully Recovering

"We entertained the thought that staying clean was not paying off and the old thinking stirred up self-pity, resentment, and anger."
Basic Text pg. 98

There are days when some of us wallow in self-pity. It's easy to do. We may have expectations about how our lives should be in recovery, expectations that aren't always met. Maybe we've tried unsuccessfully to control someone, or we think our circumstances should be different. Perhaps we've compared ourselves with other recovering addicts and found ourselves lacking. The more we try to make our life conform to our expectations, the more uncomfortable we feel. Self-pity can arise from living in our expectations instead of in the world as it actually is.

When the world doesn't measure up to our expectations, it's often our expectations that need adjusting, not the world. We can start by comparing our lives today with the way they used to be, developing gratitude for our recovery. We can extend this exercise in gratitude by counting the good things in our lives, becoming thankful that the world does not conform to our expectations but exceeds them. And if we continue working the Twelve Steps, further cultivating gratitude and acceptance, what we can expect in the future is more growth, more happiness, and more peace of mind.

We've been given much in recovery; staying clean has paid off. Acceptance of our lives, just for today, frees us from our self-pity.

Just for today: I will accept my life, gratefully, just as it is.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there's gum in my hair and when I got out of bed this morning I tripped on the skateboard and by mistake I dropped my sweater in the sink while the water was running and I could tell it was going to be a terrible day. --Judith Viorst
Some days, for all our good intentions, seem to go sour from the start. Maybe we're tired or feeling ill or preoccupied with a problem that seems insurmountable. Maybe we just got up on the wrong side of the bed.
Living one day at a time means getting the most we can out of today. It also means we know today does not have to doom or dictate tomorrow. If we have a bad day today, that's all it is--a bad day. It does not mean we're bad or that the world is against us or that we might as well give in to our worst attitudes and behaviors since nothing is going right anyway. And it does not mean tomorrow will be a bad day, too.
When we have a bad day--and everyone does--there are a few things we can do while we wait it out. We can slow down. We can be quiet. We can pray. And we can let go. How else will we be able to recognize a wonderful day?
Am I living today--good or bad--and not tomorrow or yesterday?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Self-respect is the fruit of discipline; the sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself. --Abraham Heschel
Most of us have struggled with our self-esteem. We believed if we felt better about ourselves we could change some of our behavior. In recovery we found the reverse to be true. First our behavior changed, then our self-esteem improved.
Only after we stop doing things we don't respect can we hear and accept the goodwill of others around us. Then we see our value as men because we are upholding strong self-images by our actions. This is not easy to do. As we learn, we continue to say no to weak behaviors, and we are released to feel greater dignity.
Saying no to my negative behavior today will improve my self-respect.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
"If onlys" are lonely. --Morgan Jennings
The circumstances of our lives seldom live up to our expectations or desires. However, in each circumstance we are offered an opportunity for growth or change, a chance for greater understanding of life's heights and pitfalls. Each time we choose to lament what isn't, we close the door on the invitation to a better existence.
We simply don't know just what's best for us. Our vision is limited. Less so today than yesterday, but limited still. The experiences we are offered will fail to satisfy our expectations because we expect so much less than God has planned for us in the days ahead.
We get what we need, in the way of relationships, adventures, joys and sorrows, today and every day. Celebrating what we get and knowing there is good in it eases whatever trial we are undergoing. We are cared for, right now. We need not lament what we think we need. We do have what we need. We will always get what we need, when we need it.
I will breathe deeply and relax. At this moment my every need is being attended to. My life is unfolding exactly as it should.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Surrender
Surrender means saying, "Okay, God. I'll do whatever You want." Faith in the God of our recovery means we trust that, eventually, we'll like doing that.
Today, I will surrender to my Higher Power. I'll trust that God's plan for me will be good, even if it is different than I hoped for or expected.

I immediately release everything I am struggling with today. I release everything to my Higher Power, knowing that I am getting all the help that I need today. --Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

The Power of Gratitude Never Wanes

The haunting music of “Amazing Grace” followed me throughout my travels. I heard it first in the rustic cabin I rented in Arizona. The music from a distant flute wound through the air, filling it like incense, filling me with peace.

The next time I heard the music was at an old Montana hotel. The notes were clearer this time, as the soothing melody drifted across the courtyard.

Then, near the forest in Washington. I heard the hymn once more, again played on a flute. The notes rang out. The melody filled the air, gratitude flooded my soul.

“Amazing Grace” is following me, I thought. I thought again. No, grace wasn’t following me; grace had found me.

The power of gratitude never wanes. Say it when you feel and believe it. Say it when you don’t. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Soon you will hear the music,too. This song of grace will touch you with its haunting melody.

Amazing, amazing grace.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Move from your center

Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with all thy might.
–Ecclesiastes 9:10

Move from your center.

It’s a lesson I learned in aikido. But it’s more than a lesson about martial arts, it’s an ancient lesson about how we’re to live.

Try this exercise. Walk across the room wishing you were someplace else– in your chair, in your car, or with your friend. Then do an activity for five minutes, like washing dishes, concentrating the entire time on something else you’d rather be doing, or something you’re worrying about. Then, walk back to where you started.

Now, walk across the room conscious of each step, fully present in each move. Pay attention to where you’re at and how each step feels. And be willing and intending to be right where you are. Wash the dishes, present for the feel of the hot water, the smell of the soap, and for how the floor feels under your feet. Be conscious and aware. Be intending to wash those dishes. Be right there, in that moment in time. Be aware of washing until the dishes are clean and rinsing until they’re clear. Be happy and grateful for the task. Give that task your all.

That’s moving from your center. It means right there, completely present, focused, and aware. We’re not wishing we were someplace else. And we place great value on what we’re doing, no matter what the size of the task. How much richer our lives become when we put all into all that we do. The colors are brighter, the success sweeter, the loss sharper, and the lessons more true.

Move from your center in all that you do, even the ordinary tasks and moments of life. Pour all of your heart into your relationships. Give your best ideas at work. Don’t worry, the universe has more where those came from. Stop the car on the side of the road and watch the sunset.

Whatsoever you find to do, do it with all your might.

God, remind me to live my life fully every day.

*****

Combating Emotional Vampires
From the Combating Emotional Vampires On-Line Course by Dr. Judith Orloff

The following is an excerpt from the "Combating Emotional Vampires" on-line course. If you would like to take the entire course, click here.

Relationships are always an energy exchange. To stay feeling our best, we must ask ourselves: Who gives us energy? Who saps it? It's important to be surrounded by supportive, heart-centered people who make us feel safe and secure. It's equally important to pinpoint the emotional vampires, who, whether they intend to or not, leech our energy.

To protect your sensitivity, it's imperative to name and combat these emotional vampires. They're everywhere: coworkers, neighbors, family, and friends. In Energy Psychiatry I've treated a revolving door of patients who've been hard-hit by drainers--truly a mental health epidemic that conventional medicine doesn't see. I'm horrified by how many of these "emotionally walking wounded" (ordinarily perceptive, intelligent individuals) have become resigned to chronic anxiety or depression. Why the blind spot? Most of us haven't been educated about draining people or how to emancipate ourselves from their clutches, requisite social skills for everyone desiring freedom. Emotional draining is a touchy subject. We don't know how to tactfully address our needs without alienating others. The result: We get tongue-tied, or destructively passive. We ignore the SOS from our gut that screams, "Beware!" Or, quaking in our boots, we're so afraid of the faux pas of appearing "impolite" that w! e become martyrs in lieu of being respectfully assertive. We don't speak out because we don't want to be seen as "difficult" or uncaring.

Vampires do more than drain our physical energy. The super-malignant ones can make you believe you're an unworthy, unlovable wretch who doesn't deserve better. The subtler species inflict damage that's more of a slow burn. Smaller digs here and there can make you feel bad about yourself such as, "Dear, I see you've put on a few pounds" or "It's not lady-like to interrupt." In a flash, they've zapped you by prodding areas of shaky self-worth.

This is my credo for vampires: Their antics are unacceptable; you must develop a successful plan for coping with them. I deeply believe in the merciful message of The Lord's Prayer to "forgive people their trespasses," but I'm also a proponent of preventing the unconscious or mean-spirited from trespassing against us. Taking a stand against draining people is a form of self-care and canny communication that you must practice to give your freedom legs.

What turns someone into an emotional vampire? First, a psychological reason: children often reflexively mimic their parents' most unflattering traits. A self-absorbed father can turn you into a self-absorbed son. Early modeling has impact. Studies of Holocaust survivors reveal that many became abusive parents themselves. The second explanation involves subtle energy. I've observed that childhood trauma--mistreatment, loss, parental alcoholism, illness--can weaken a person's energy field. This energy leakage may condition those with such early wounds to draw on the vitality of others to compensate; it's not something most are aware of. Nevertheless, the effects can be extreme. Visualize an octopus-like tendril extending from their energy field and glomming onto yours. Your intuition may register this as sadness, anger, fatigue, or a cloying, squirrelly feeling. The degree of mood change or physical reaction may vary. A vampire's effects can stun like a sonic blast or make you! slowly wilt. But it's the rare drainer that sets out to purposely enervate you. The majority act unconsciously, oblivious to being an emotional drain.

Let me tell you the secret of how a vampire operates so you can outsmart one. A vampire goes in for the kill by stirring up your emotions. Pushing your buttons throws you off center, which renders you easier to drain. Of all the emotional types, empaths are often the most devastated. However, certain emotional states increase everyone's vulnerability. I myself am most susceptible to emotional vampires when I feel desperate, tired, or disempowered. Here are some others:

# Low self-esteem
# Depression
# A victim mentality
# Fear of asserting yourself
# Addiction to people-pleasing

When encountering emotional vampires, see what you can learn too. It's your choice. You can simply feel tortured, resentful, and impotent. Or, as I try to do, ask yourself, "How can this interchange help me grow?" Every nanosecond of life, good, bad, or indifferent, is a chance to become emotionally freer, enlarge the heart. If we're to have any hope of breaking war-mongering patterns, we must each play a part. As freedom fighters, strive to view vampires as opportunities to enlist your highest self and not be a sucker for negativity. Then you'll leave smelling like a rose, even with Major-League Draculas. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Although we came into The Program to deal with a specific problem, we soon became aware that we would find not only freedom from addiction, but freedom to live in the real world without fear and frustration. We learned that the solutions are within ourselves. With the help of my Higher Power, I can enrich my life with comfort, enjoyment and deep-down serenity. Am I changing from my own worst enemy to my own best friends?

Today I Pray

May I praise my Higher Power for my freedoms — from addiction, from spiritual bankruptcy, from loneliness, from fear, from delusions, from shallowness, from doom. I give thanks for the way of life that has given me these freedoms and replace the empty spaces with extra goodness and peace of mind.

Today I Will Remember

To give thanks for all my freedoms.

************************************

Food For Thought

Principles Before Personalities

One of the strengths of our fellowship lies in the fact that we place principles before personalities. OA is not a social club. We form meaningful and lasting friendships, but personal friendship is always subordinate to the program itself.

Putting principles before personalities means that we may expect help and consideration from any other member. Conversely, we are expected to give our attention and assistance to anyone who asks, regardless of how well we like that individual personally. The Twelve Steps and principles of OA unity are more important than the personal relationships of any members in our group.

Because we are committed to abstinence from compulsive overeating and to working the program, we respond honestly and say what we believe to be in the best interest of those we sponsor and those we talk with. We do no one a favor if we dilute our program in order to make it more palatable to someone we personally like.

May I remember to place principles before personalities.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ Gratitude ~
If the only prayer you said in your whole life
was, "Thank you," that would suffice.
Meister Eckhart

I spent most of my life blaming my circumstances and those around me for the way I felt, for my eating problem and for my terrible life in general. There was nothing good in my life at all and I viewed everything through a dark cloud of negativity. I couldn't see anything good in my life, and life became totally unbearable. Poor me, I thought. It really wasn't fair that I had been made to suffer the way I had, and I felt awash with self pity. The more sorry I felt for myself, the more I ate, and the more I ate, the worse I felt; it became a vicious circle.

When I was brought to my knees by this disease and came into the fellowship, I was forced to take stock and look honestly at my life. For the first time ever I considered the losses and difficult situations in my life that I had perceived as unfair and negative. In each case there had been amazing gains. For example, the car accident I'd been in hadn't been my fault at all. In fact, it became the catalyst that enabled me to change careers. One of the bereavements that I had brought a wonderful and special friend into my life. And so it went. Before, I had bemoaned my fate as a compulsive overeater. Now, I am actually grateful to be a compulsive overeater, because without my disease I never would have a wonderful program that helps me to live my life sanely and serenely, nor would I have all the very special people who love and support me through thick and thin.

One Day at a Time . . .
I am grateful for all the wonderful miracles that have happened in my life as a result of this program ... may I never forget to thank my Higher Power for all these wonderful blessings.
~ Sharon S. ~

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

Suppose now you are making your second visit to a man. He has read this volume and says he is prepared to go through with the Twelve Steps of the program of recovery. Having had the experience yourself, you can give him much practical advice. Let him know you are available if he wishes to make a decision and tell his story, but do not insist upon it if he prefers to consult someone else. - Pg. 96 - Working With Others

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

'Living life on life's terms, just what does this mean to us? It doesn't mean we will get a brownie button for every day we stay abstinent. It simply means life can be tough and we can still stay sober if we chose to live by principle.

Help me live life on life's terms by accepting the good along with bad realizing that 'realities' are not good excuses to use mind-affecting chemicals.

Dreaming Dreams

Today, I will dream dreams. There is nothing wrong with having a couple of dreams for myself if they are realistic and don't remove me from life too much. To work toward a dream can be a constructive use of my talents and energies. It can give me a positive focus. If my dreams are wild and I am not willing to do the work necessary to realize them, they will only frustrate me and lower my self-esteem. If, however, I am able to dream what makes sense for me and work to put it within my reach, it can be a real process of growth and challenge. My energy and enthusiasm can help me move through blocks, and my commitment can show me that love and effort can be their own reward.

I can stretch myself.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

There are no magic wands or burning bushes in our program. Just footwork and faith.

As I feed my faith, my doubts will starve to death.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

The Steps keep us from suicide; the Traditions, from homicide.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I immediately release everything I am struggling with today. I release everything to my Higher Power, knowing that I am getting all the help that I need today.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I'm the type of alcoholic that when I stop drinking, for all practical purposes, that's where my alcoholism begins. - Bob D.

[bluidkiti]

November 25

Daily Reflections

A POWERFUL TRADITION

In the years before the publication of the book "Alcoholics
Anonymous," we had no name. . .by a narrow majority the verdict
was for naming our book "The Way Out." . . .One of our early lone
members. . . found exactly twelve books already titled "The Way
Out.". . . So "Alcoholics Anonymous" became first choice. That's
how we got a name for our book of experience, a name for our
movement and, as we are now beginning to see, a tradition of the
greatest spiritual import.
"A.A. TRADITION: HOW IT DEVELOPED." pp. 35-36

Beginning with Bill's momentous decision in Akron to make a
telephone call rather than a visit to the hotel bar, how often has a
Higher Power made itself felt at crucial moments in our history! The
eventual importance that the principle of anonymity would acquire
was but dimly perceived, if at all, in those early days. There seems to
have been an element of chance even in the choice of a name for our
Fellowship.
God is no stranger to anonymity and often appears in human affairs
in the guises of "luck", "chance," or "coincidence." If anonymity,
somewhat fortuitously, became the spiritual basis for all of our
Traditions, perhaps God was acting anonymously on our behalf.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

I am not so envious of other people, nor am I so jealous of other people's possessions
and talents. When I was drinking, I was secretly full of jealousy and envy of those
people who could drink normally, who had the love and respect of their families, who
lived a normal life and were accepted as equals by their friends. I pretended to
myself that I was as good as they were, but I knew it wasn't so. Now I don't have
to be envious any more. I try not to want what I don't deserve. I'm content to live with
what I have earned by my efforts to live the right way. More power to those who
have what I have not. At least, I'm trying. Have I got rid of the poison of envy?

Meditation For The Day

"My soul is restless till it finds its rest in Thee." A river flows on, until it loses itself
in the sea. Our spirits long for rest in the Spirit of God. We yearn to realize a peace,
a rest, a satisfaction that we have never found in the world or its pursuits. Some are
not conscious of their need, and shut down the doors of their spirits against the
spirit of God. They are unable to have true peace.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may feel the divine unrest. I pray that my soul may find its rest in God.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

Three Choices, p. 327

The immediate object of our quest is sobriety--freedom from alcohol
and from all its baleful consequences. Without this freedom, we have
nothing at all.

Paradoxically, though, we can achieve no liberation from the alcohol
obsession until we become willing to deal with those character defects
which have landed us in that helpless condition. In this freedom quest,
we are always given three choices.

A rebellious refusal to work upon our glaring defects can be an almost
certain ticket to destruction. Or, perhaps for a time, we can stay
sober with a minimum of self-improvement and settle ourselves into a
comfortable but often dangerous mediocrity. Or, finally, we can
continuously try hard for those sterling qualities that can add up to
fineness of spirit and action--true and lasting freedom under God.

Grapevine, November 1960

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

What ought to work-- but doesn't
Understanding Alcoholism
One of the old theories about alcoholism was that we drink because we had deep psychological problems. It followed that if we could clear up these problems, we would no longer need to drink excessively.
Another theory was that staying dry for a long period of time would dislodge one's alcoholic tendencies. After a certain length of sobriety, we would be able to return to normal drinking. (NOT)
Both theories sound plausible, but in practice neither has worked. Many of us came to grief trying to make these ideas work.
What we eventually learn about psychological problems is that they may intensify our troubles, but they are not the real cause of our alcoholism. The cause may be rooted in some physical problem that enables us to achieve unusual highs from drinking. We also know that one drink acts as a trigger for more drinking--- at least for us.
Our answer has been, first and foremost, to eliminate the first drink. Even if it doesn't square with theories, it works.
No matter how long I've been sober, one drink would be deadly to me. Accepting that fact enabled me to get sober after finding that theories about my problem weren't working.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Love is the reward of love.---Johann von Schiller
When we used alcohol and other drugs, we shared little as possible. There was little love in our hearts. We had become selfish. This caused us to be lonely.
Then something happened to change all of that. Remember the first time you walked into a meeting? You were met by people who shared. Maybe they shared a smile, their story, or just a cup of coffee with you. The sharing that goes on in a Twelve Step program is great. We learn that the more we give, the more we get. We get well by giving to others. Helping others is a great way to hold on to sobriety. Love is the reward of love.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I will be there when others need me. I pray that service will become a big part of my program.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think of friends who could use my help. I’ll talk to them and offer to be there for them.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Change occurs when one becomes what she is, not when she tries to become what she is not. --Ruth P. Freedman
Learning self-acceptance, and then loving the selves we are, present perhaps our two biggest hurdles to the attainment of emotional and spiritual health. Fortunately, they are not insurmountable hurdles. The program offers ready assistance.
Women everywhere are making great strides in self-love and self-acceptance. We are learning self-love. And we are changing. The support we can give our sisters, and the support we receive, multiplies many times the healthy energy created--healthy energy that touches us all.
Emotional and spiritual health are gifts promised by the program, when we work it. We must move beyond our perfectionism and relish our humanness. And the Steps are the way. We must learn humility and develop faith, and the Steps are the way. Learning to love all our parts, the qualities we like and the traits that discouragingly hang on, offers a new freedom. A freedom that invites change. A freedom that safeguards the emotional and spiritual well-being that we strive for.
Confidence will come with my healthy self-acceptance.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

Frequently, you have felt obliged to tell your husband’s employer and his friends that he was sick, when as a matter of fact he was tight. Avoid answering these inquiries as much as you can. Whenever possible, let your husband explain. Your desire to protect him should not cause you to lie to people when they have a right to know where he is and what he is doing. Discuss this with him when he is sober and in good spirits. Ask him what you should do if he places you in such a position again. But be careful not to be resentful about the last time he did so.

pp. 115-116

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

I found my empty purse on the floor, but I knew I could never make it to the car. I became terrified. Who could I call? I never saw my friends anymore, and there was no way I could call family. I remembered the number in the pocket of my jeans. I hadn't even gotten dressed for several days. Where were the jeans?
I searched the house until I found them on the floor of the bedroom. The number was in the pocket. After three tries I managed to dial the number. A woman's voice answered.
"I . . . uh . . . got this number from you . . . uh . . . Is this A.A.?" I asked.
"Yes. Do you want to stop drinking?"
"Please, yes. I need help. Oh, God." I felt the fiery tears run down my face.

p. 466 - 467

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

But it is from our twisted relations with family, friends, and society at large that many of us have suffered the most. We have been especially stupid and stubborn about them. The primary fact that we fail to recognize is our total inability to form a true partnership with another human being. Our egomania digs two disastrous pitfalls. Either we insist upon dominating the people we know, or we depend upon them far too much. If we lean too heavily on people, they will sooner or later fail us, for they are human, too, and cannot possibly meet our incessant demands. In this way our insecurity grows and festers. When we habitually try to manipulate others to our own willful desires, they revolt, and resist us heavily. Then we develop hurt feelings, a sense of persecution, and a desire to retaliate. As we redouble our efforts at control, and continue to fail, our suffering becomes acute and constant. We have not once sought to be one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society. Always we tried to struggle to the top of the heap, or to hide underneath it. This self-centered behavior blocked a partnership relation with any one of those about us. Of true brotherhood we had small comprehension.

p. 53

************************************************** *********

A recovering alcoholic without a sponsor is much like a ship without a rudder.
--unknown

"A positive attitude is like a fire: Unless you continue to add fuel, it goes out."
--Alexander Lockhart

We're all going to have winds and waves in our lives but nothing that
happens can destroy your life unless you allow it to destroy what's in you. Work on
building conscious contact with God that is stronger than anything in the world, so you
don't look to the world as your guidance.
Look within and you will find the power and love of God.
--Mary Manin Morrissey

"The sweetest of all sounds is praise."
--Xenophon

Start living now.
Stop saving the good china for that special occasion.
Stop withholding your love until that special person materializes.
Every day you are alive is a special occasion.
Every minute, every breath, is a gift from God.
--Mary Manin Morrissey

"If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans for the day."
--unknown

***********************************************

Father Leo's Daily Meditation

IDEALISM

"I am an idealist. I don't know
where I am going but I'm on my
way."
-- Carl Sandburg

Today I am on the move. I feel an energy in my life that gets excited each day. New
people, new places, new ideas all give me "a spiritual charge" that help me enjoy my
life.

I don't have all the answers and sometimes I am confused but today I can live with this
and enjoy it. God seems to reveal Himself more in the questions rather than the
answers; it is the problems that produce the growth.

The journey of my life is an adventure that is free and unchartered, even the pain and
problems produce a benefit that can be used for my recovery. Nothing need be wasted.

I am the Way. I am the Truth. I am the Light.

************************************************** *********

“Your heart will be where your treasure is.”
Luke 12:34

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger.
The wise person makes learning a joy; fools spout only
foolishness. The LORD is watching everywhere, keeping his eye
on both the evil and the good. Gentle words bring life and health;
a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit. Only a fool despises a
parent's discipline; whoever learns from correction is wise.
Proverbs 15:1-5

Therefore, since we have been made right in God's sight by faith,
we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord
has done for us. Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into
this place of highest privilege where we now stand, and we
confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God's glory.
Romans 5:1-2

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

If you worry a little each day, it eventually will add up to years. Lord, without Your strength it is so easy to let circumstances rob me of my joy.

God is calling us to experience peace, satisfaction and joy as we have never experienced. Lord, I will follow You as You lift me to new levels of living.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Meditation

"Quieting the mind through meditation brings and inner peace that brings us into contact with the God within us."
Basic Text pg.45

As our recovery progresses, we often reflect on what brought us to Narcotics Anonymous in the first place and are able to appreciate how much the quality of our lives has improved. We no longer have to fear our own thoughts. And the more we pray and meditate, the more we experience a calm sense of well-being. The peace and tranquillity we experience during our quiet times confirms that our most important needs - our spiritual needs - are being met.

We are able to empathize with other addicts and strengthen our conscience in the process. We learn to avoid judging others and experience the freedom to be ourselves. In our spiritual reflection, we intuitively find "the God within us" and see that we are in harmony with a Power greater than ourselves.

Just for today: I will reflect upon the gift of recovery and listen quietly for my Higher Power's guidance.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
All music is what awakes from you when you are reminded by the instruments. --Walt Whitman
A small group of friends sat in a room around a record player. It was a heavy old thing, with parts that had to be operated by hand and only one speaker--nothing like a modern stereo at all, but more like an antique phonograph. The record--a recording of their favorite music--was old, too, and scratched, its grooves worn smooth as a stone in some places. The tone arm skipped and scratched, and the sound was tinny, hard on the ears.
Most of the friends squirmed in their seats as they listened, and several grumbled that it was impossible to hear the music with such inferior equipment.
But one of the group sat listening, her eyes closed, swaying to the music and humming softly to herself.
"How can you enjoy this?" the others asked.
"Ah," she said with a mysterious smile. "I am listening beyond the recording to the music I know is there!"
Can I find the music that's playing for me today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
It's the awareness, the full experience... of how you are stuck, that makes you recover. --Frederick S. Perls
When we become aware of how far off our path we have strayed, when we see how cold and hard we were to someone we love, when we are no longer blind to our blindness - then we are touched by painful feelings. We feel guilty about the harm we caused. We grieve the lost moments and lost opportunities. We may feel angry with ourselves for our stubbornness. But even with our pain, we are worlds away from that blindness.
This new awareness is a spiritual place. It brings us back into contact with our Higher Power and makes us available to the words of wisdom and concern of others. It reminds us that no man can walk this path on his own power. We all must remain open and in contact with the healing relationships around us.
I pray for awareness today as my doorway to spiritual healing.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Change occurs when one becomes what she is, not when she tries to become what she is not. --Ruth P. Freedman
Learning self-acceptance, and then loving the selves we are, present perhaps our two biggest hurdles to the attainment of emotional and spiritual health. Fortunately, they are not insurmountable hurdles. The program offers ready assistance.
Women everywhere are making great strides in self-love and self-acceptance. We are learning self-love. And we are changing. The support we can give our sisters, and the support we receive, multiplies many times the healthy energy created--healthy energy that touches us all.
Emotional and spiritual health are gifts promised by the program, when we work it. We must move beyond our perfectionism and relish our humanness. And the Steps are the way. We must learn humility and develop faith, and the Steps are the way. Learning to love all our parts, the qualities we like and the traits that discouragingly hang on, offers a new freedom. A freedom that invites change. A freedom that safeguards the emotional and spiritual well-being that we strive for.
Confidence will come with my healthy self-acceptance.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Awareness
When we first become aware of a problem, a situation, or a feeling, we may react with anxiety or fear. There is no need to fear awareness. No need.
Awareness is the first step toward positive change and growth. It's the first step toward solving the problem, or getting the need met, the first step toward the future. It's how we focus on the next lesson.
Awareness is how life, the Universe, and our Higher Power get our attention and prepare us for change. The process of becoming changed begins with awareness. Awareness, acceptance, and change - that's the cycle. We can accept the temporary discomfort from awareness because that's how we're moved to a better place. We can accept the temporary discomfort because we can trust God, and ourselves.
Today, I will be grateful for any awareness I encounter. I will display gratitude, peace, and dignity when life gets my attention. I will remember that it's okay to accept the temporary discomfort from awareness because I can trust that it's my Higher Power moving me forward.

Today I celebrate all of me exactly as I am. --Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

Make Today a Healing Day

Take time for healing. Take time for what soothes your body, your mind, your soul.

Take a bath. Light a candle. Read a book. Take a walk. Get a massage. See your favorite healer if you desire. See a movie. Buy some flowers. Drink a cup of tea.

Sometimes we talk ourselves out of doing something healing for ourselves. We’re too busy, too tired. But that is when we most need to take care of ourselves. Listen to your heart. What does it want? Listen to your body. What does it need? Trust what you hear.

Make today a healing day. Then take some time and make every day a healing day.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Express your power gently

Express your power naturally and as gently as you can.

When I started learning what it meant to take care of myself and to own my power, I talked loudly, spoke up, and yelled in order to set boundaries, limits, and to express myself. That was the way to get my point across. That’s how I’d showed people I meant what I said.

I had to say it loudly.

About five years after I started this process of learning what it meant to own my power, I met a bear called Winnie the Pooh. The book that introduced me was The Tao of Pooh. Lights started coming on. The seeds of new lessons began to sprout.

To own my power, I could quietly say what I meant. The clearer I was about what I had to say and who I was, the less I had to shout. Owning my power wasn’t something I had to plan out, premeditate, and obsess about.

The more I took care of myself and connected to myself, and the clearer I became, the more natural and easier it became to own my power. My power–including setting limits, saying no, refusing to be manipulated, and saying I’d changed my mind– often became a natural, graceful, timely expression of me.

There are still times in our lives when we have to be firm, sometimes forceful, and repeat what we’ve said, sometimes loudly. The quieter and more relaxed we can be when we say what we mean is usually in direct proportion to how much we believe in ourselves.

Let your power, boundaries, and expressions of who you are arise naturally.

Learn and respect the value of responding as gently, but as firmly, as you can.

God, help your power flow through me. Teach me to take care of myself gently, in a way that reflects harmony with myself and as much as possible, the people in my life.

*****

A Gift of the Heart
Letting People Know You Love Them

It’s easy to take our feelings for granted and to assume that the people we care about know how we feel about them. But while those we love are often quite cognizant of our feelings, saying "I love you" is a gift we should give to our loved ones whenever we can. Letting people know you love them is an important part of nurturing any kind of loving relationship. Few people tire of being told they are loved, and saying "I love you" can make a world of difference in someone’s life, take a relationship to a new level, or reaffirm and strengthen a steady bond. Everyone needs to hear the words "I love you." Three simple words – I - Love - You. When you declare your love for someone you admit to them that you care for them in the most significant way.

It can be difficult to express your love using words, particularly if you grew up around people that never expressed their affection verbally. But you should never be afraid to say "I love you" or worry that doing so will thrust you into a position of excessive vulnerability. It is important to share your feelings with those that matter to you. Part of the fulfillment that comes with loving someone is telling them that you love them. Besides, love exists to be expressed, not withheld.

If you love someone, let them know. Don’t be afraid of the strength of your emotions or worry that your loved one won’t feel the same way. Besides, the words "I love you" are often best said to another without expectation of a return investment. As each one of us is filled with an abundance of love, there is never any worry that you’ll run out of love if your expression of love isn’t said back to you. Saying, "I love you" is a gift of the heart sent directly via words to the heart of a recipient. Even though it may not always look that way, love from the heart is an offering that is always unconditional and given without strings attached. That is the true essence of the gift of "I love you." Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

“What you have may seem small; you desire so much more. See children thrusting heir hands into a narrow necked jar, striving to pull out the sweets. If they fell the hand, they cannot pull it out and then they fall to tears. When they let go a few, they can draw out the rest. You, too, let your desire go; cover not too much..”
– Epictetus

Let me expect not too much of anyone, particularly myself,. Let me learn to settle for less than I wish were possible, and be willing to accept it and appreciate it. Do I accept gratefully and graciously the good that has already come to me in The Program?

Today I Pray

May I search my soul for those little hankerings of what which may keep me from delighting in all that I have. If I can just teach myself not to want too much, not to expect too much, then when those expectations are not satisfied, I will not be let down. May I accept with grace what the grace of God has provided.

Today I Will Remember

I , alone, can grant myself the “freedom from want.”

*************************************

One More Day

Be a football to Time and Chance, the more kicks the better, so that you inspect the whole game and know it’s utmost law.
– Ralph Wldo Emerson

There’s something attractive about having a controlled life, a life in which we’re never embarrassed or disappointed or fooled. Perhaps it’s safety we seek when we try to control everyone and everything around us. As is so often true, we can’t get one thing without forfeiting another. In this case, if we choose safety, wee lose spontaneity and excitement.

Although we don’t want to take dangerous risks or make foolish choices when clearly better ones present themselves, we may want to loosen our tight, controlling grasp on our lives. To live fully and joyously, we do want and need to examine the range of experiences life offers. Yes we may get a few bumps and bruises, but we’ll always find joy and contentment

Today, I will welcome the unexpected in my life.

************************************

Food For Thought

Regaining Control

Temporary loss of control resulting in a slip does not need to send us off on a protracted binge. We have tools, which we may use to regain control and reestablish firm abstinence.

If we find ourselves deviating from our food plan, however slightly, we need to make contact with our sponsor or another OA member. Honestly admitting that we are having trouble prevents us from losing touch with reality and slipping back into our old habits. If we pretend that all is well when it is not, we cut ourselves off from the help and support we need.

When we are tempted, it is a good idea to remove ourselves from the source of temptation and get involved in another activity. Reading the literature or going to a meeting can renew our OA commitment.

In the last analysis, it is our Higher Power who provides the control, which we lack. To turn over our lack of control is to open ourselves to the Power that keeps us abstinent.

Control my life. Lord.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ CHOICE ~
The strongest principle of growth lies in human choice.
George Eliot

I spent most of my life blaming others for my woes and the fact that I was a compulsive overeater. I thought, "If you had had a mother like I did, an ex-husband or a tough life like mine, you would also have turned to food for comfort or to block all the painful feelings." I was sure that had I had an easier life like I perceived others to have, I wouldn't have had to do the things around food that I did. I never took responsibility for my part in all this because, in truth, I was the one who chose to react to my life in that way. Nobody forced me to behave the way I did and nobody held me down and forced food into my mouth.

I never used to realize that I do have choices in life. I can choose not to eat foods that are harmful to me; I can choose not to surround myself with unhealthy relationships; I can choose not to let other people's problems become my own; in fact, I have choices in most things that I do. I can choose to have a more positive attitude today, instead of focusing on all the negatives. I do not have to react to life's adversities with destructive behaviors. I can choose to be active in my life rather than being reactive, like a sailing ship in a stormy sea that is totally at the mercy of the weather. I can choose to seize life with both hands and live it the best I know how.

One day at a time... . . .
Today I choose to work this program of recovery knowing that, even with life's difficulties, the promises of the program will come true in my life, and I will know serenity and peace.
Sharon S.

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We have elsewhere remarked how much better life is when lived on a spiritual plane. If God can solve the age-old riddle of alcoholism, He can solve your problems too. - Pg. 116 - To Wives

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

It may be your family, friends, or co-workers that support you now or they all may have abandoned you. You may be surprised by who you can count on. Someone that you did not expect to come through might and others whom you thought you could count on may fall short of your expectations. Try not to blame the ones that fall short and be grateful for the ones who go the extra mile.

My friends and family, like myself all have different strengths and weaknesses. I ask that I not be too critical of the ones who can't be the support I want today and I give blessings for those who can.

Having Fun

Today, I will have fun. What's the point of all the work I do in recovery if my life doesn't become lighter and happier? Even though I am working through deep issues, there is no reason why I can't have some enjoyment in the process. Fun is when I relax and let things happen - when I can laugh at myself and other people - when I don't take everything in life so seriously. It is when I can enjoy a seemingly meaningless conversation just for its own sake. Fun is when it doesn't have to be all my way - when the heavy load is removed, when my meter is turned off and I just goof around in the moment. Fun is something I don't have enough of for a number of silly reasons. Today I see that there is no reason not to enjoy myself.

I can let go and have fun.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

We make two great decisions in life: one, the decision to get clean and sober; the other, the decision to stay that way. Never make the decision not to stay that way when you are depressed or unhappy.

'Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time.' ~Robert Schuller

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

We are only as sick as our secrets; we are only as healthy as our honesty.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I celebrate all of me exactly as I am.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

The more my head swells the less my mind expands. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

November 26

Daily Reflections

THE HAZARDS OF PUBLICITY

People who symbolize causes and ideas fill a deep human
need. We of A.A. do not question that. But we do have to
soberly face the fact that being in the public eye is
hazardous, especially for us.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 181

As a recovered alcoholic I must make an effort to put
into practice the principles of the A.A. program, which
are founded on honesty, truth and humility. While I was
drinking I was constantly trying to be in the limelight.
Now that I am conscious of my mistakes and of my former
lack of integrity, it would not be honest to seek
prestige, even for the justifiable purpose of promoting
the A.A. message of recovery. Is the publicity that
centers around the A.A. Fellowship and the miracles it
produces not worth much more? Why not let the people
around us appreciate by themselves the changes that A.A.
has brought in us, for that will be a far better
recommendation for the Fellowship than any I could make.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

Continuing our thoughts about the rewards that have come
to us as a result of our new way of living: We have found
that we have got rid of many of our fears, resentments,
inferiority complexes, negative points of view,
self-centeredness, inner conflicts, the habits of
procrastination, undisciplined sex, wasting money,
boredom, false perfectionism, and jealousy and envy of
others. We are glad to be rid of our drinking, and we
are also very glad to be rid of these other things. We
can now go forward in the new way of life, as shown us by
A.A. Am I ready to go forward in the new life?

Meditation For The Day

"He that has eyes to see, let him see." To the seeing eye,
the world is good. Pray for a seeing eye, to see the purpose
of God in everything good. Pray for enough faith to see God's
care in His dealings with you. Try to see how He has brought
you safely through your past life so that now you can be of
use in the world. With the eyes of faith you can see God's
care and purpose everywhere.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have a seeing eye. I pray that with the
eye of faith I may see God's purpose everywhere.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

A New-Found Providence, p. 328

When dealing with a prospect of agnostic or atheistic bent, you had
better use everyday language to describe spiritual principles. There is
no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological
terms and conceptions, about which he may already be confused.
Don't raise such issues, no matter what your own convictions are.

<< << << >> >> >>

Every man and woman who has joined A.A. and intends to stick has,
without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three. Isn't it true that,
in all matters touching upon alcohol, each of them has decided to turn
his or her life over to the care, protection, and guidance of A.A.?

Already a willingness has been achieved to cast out one's own will and
one's own ideas about the alcohol problem in favor of those suggested
by A.A. Now if this is not turning one's will and life over to a
new-found "Providence," then what is it?

1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 93
2. 12 & 12, p. 35

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

Waste Utilization
Releasing the past
Today the world faces seemingly insurmountable problems with solid and liquid waste. Communities struggle to find solutions as waste accumulates and space for disposal sites grows scarce.
As recovering people, we have a similar problem with waste residues from our past. We don't seem to be able to bury bad memories; like the physical waste in the environment, they come back to poison us.
The best answer is to use waste, not throw it away. Instead of trying to bury the past, let's keep it in view but let it be purified by the sunlight of honesty and humility. By admitting past wrongs and forgiving
everyone involved.... including ourselves..... we turn waste into useful experience. Nature can do this with much physical waste, over time. we can also let our spiritual nature do that with the emotional and
mental waste of our past.
I'll realize that every past mistake and experience can be properly utilized today for something good and uplifting.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

Love is the reward of love.---Johann von Schiller
When we used alcohol and other drugs, we shared little as possible. There was little love in our hearts. We had become selfish. This caused us to be lonely.
Then something happened to change all of that. Remember the first time you walked into a meeting? You were met by people who shared. Maybe they shared a smile, their story, or just a cup of coffee with you. The sharing that goes on in a Twelve Step program is great. We learn that the more we give, the more we get. We get well by giving to others. Helping others is a great way to hold on to sobriety. Love is the reward of love.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I will be there when others need me. I pray that service will become a big part of my program.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think of friends who could use my help. I’ll talk to them and offer to be there for them.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

We are all held in place by the pressure of the crowd around us. We must all lean upon others. Let us see that we lean gracefully and freely and acknowledge their support. --Margaret Collier Graham
We did not come into this world alone. And our voyage through this life is in concert with many others: some who directly aid us, while others seem to hinder our paths. We don't have full knowledge, however. We can't determine the many ways we are being helped to take the right steps, even by those who block our way for the moment.
Likewise, our presence is helping to pave the way for both the friends and the strangers we will encounter today, at work, on the street, at the meeting perhaps. We have all been charged, in this life, with a similar responsibility--to help one another fulfill our destinies. Our impatience with one another, our wavering love and acceptance of each other, at times our disavowal of our brothers and sisters comes because we fail to understand the necessary part we each play in the drama of one another's life.
In my personal drama, I am sharing the stage with everyone else I encounter today. I need a supporting cast. And I need applause. I will give it freely today.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

There is another paralyzing fear. You may be afraid your husband will lose his position; you are thinking of the disgrace and hard times which will befall you and the children. This experience may come to you. Or you may already have had it several times. Should it happen again, regard it in a different light. Maybe it will prove a blessing! It may convince your husband he wants to stop drinking forever. And now you know that he can stop if he will! Time after time, this apparent calamity has been a boon to us, for it opened up a path which led to the discovery of God.

p. 116

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

Five minutes later she pulled into my driveway. She must have been some kind of angel. How had she appeared from nowhere that day in the laundromat? How had she known? How had I kept her number all that time without losing it?

p. 467

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

Some will object to many of the questions posed, because they think their own character defects have not been so glaring. To these it can be suggested that a conscientious examination is likely to reveal the very defects the objectionable questions are concerned with. Because our surface record hasn't looked too bad, we have frequently been abashed to find that this is so simply because we have buried these self same defects deep down in us under thick layers of self-justification. Whatever the defects, they have finally ambushed us into alcoholism and misery.

pp. 53-54

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If you wake up one day and feel like you are heading down the wrong
path, don't go back the way you came, make a new course instead.
--unknown

I immediately release everything I am struggling with today. I release everything to my
Higher Power, knowing that I am getting all the help that I need today.
--Ruth Fishel

If you want to leave footprints in the sands of time, don't drag your feet.
--Annot L. Sheppard

Today I am thinking about all the things I have to be grateful for and will write them
down. I will make a gratitude list, adding to it every time I think of something new. By
doing this I will be more aware of the things I have to be grateful for and will always have
something about which I can feel good, no matter what is going on in my life.
--Ruth Fishel

He who has never tasted what is bitter does not know what is sweet.
--German Proverb

Love is a fruit in season at all times, and in reach of every hand.
--Mother Teresa

"God will heal your broken heart if you give Him all the pieces."
--unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

RECOVERY

"There is a destiny that makes
us brothers, none goes his way
alone. All that we send into the
lives of others come back into
our own."
-- Edwin Markham

I can remember when I felt so isolated and alone. I used to look at people talking
with their friends, families playing in the park, lovers holding hands, and I felt so
different and awkward. I always looked at life from the outside. I was the guy without
an invitation to the party. The symptoms of addiction!

Today I know that my actions and behavior around alcohol reinforced these negative
and destructive feelings. By my drinking I was perpetuating the painful disease in my
life.

Sobriety led me into fellowship with others; it brought me into the family of
recovering people. Today I am not alone. I have over a million brothers and sisters
living a day at a time in a spiritual program. I have countless thousands finding joy,
peace and serenity in sister programs. Today I belong in this world.

O God, thank You for giving me the need to give so that I might receive.

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I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever. Every day I
will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever. Great is the LORD and most
worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. One generation will commend your
works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts. They will speak of the glorious splendor
of your majesty, and I will meditate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power
of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds. They will celebrate your
abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness. The LORD is gracious
and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. The LORD is good to all;
he has compassion on all he has made. All you have made will praise you, O LORD; your
saints will extol you. They will tell of the glory of your kingdom and speak of your might,
so that all men may know of your mighty acts and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.
Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and your dominion endures through all
generations. The LORD is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made.
The LORD upholds all those who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down. The eyes of all
look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time. You open your hand and
satisfy the desires of every living thing. The LORD is righteous in all his ways
and loving toward all he has made. The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who
call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and
saves them. The LORD watches over all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy.
My mouth will speak in praise of the LORD. Let every creature praise his holy name
for ever and ever.
Psalm 145

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Daily Inspiration

If you look for happiness outside of yourself you will never find it. Lord, help me turn inward and realize that the source of my happiness has been there all along.

Learn to be peaceful in all situations and trust that through all stages of our lives, God has a plan. Lord, may I have the wisdom to be able to turn my stumbling blocks into building blocks.

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NA Just For Today

Responsibility

"A lot happens in one day, both negative and positive. If we do not take the time to appreciate both, perhaps we will miss something that will help us grow."
IP No. 8, "Just For Today"

Responsibility, responsibility - the responsibility of life are everywhere. We're "supposed to" wear seat belts. We're "supposed to "clean our homes. We're "supposed to" do certain things for our spouse, our children, the people we sponsor. On top of all of this we're "supposed to" go to meetings and practice our program as best we can. It's no wonder that, sometimes, we want to run from all these tasks and escape to some far-off island where we're not "supposed to" do anything.

At times like these, when we become overwhelmed with our responsibilities, we have forgotten that responsibility need not be burdensome. When we have the desire to run away from our responsibilities we need to slow down, remember why we have chosen them, and pay attention to the gifts they bring. Whether it's a job we normally find challenging and interesting, or a partner whose personality we are usually excited by, or a child whom we naturally like to play with and care for, there is joy to be found in all the responsibilities of our lives.

Just for today; Each moment is special. I will pay attention, grateful for my responsibilities and the special joys they bring.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Giving up is not giving in, nor is it failing. It is no longer needing to be right. --Anonymous
When someone tells us a riddle, we may give up if we don't know the answer. We give up because we are tired of trying to get it, or because we are eager to find out what it is.
Giving up in other situations, may be more difficult. We may need to give up eating something that isn't healthy for us. We may need to give up trying to win an argument. We may need to give up old clothes that we love which no longer fit us. When we don't want to give up, it may be because we have forgotten the knowledge, health, or peace of mind we gain by doing so.
In each case, giving up means growth and going on with our lives. Giving up may mean many different things in different situations, but it does not mean doing nothing. It means doing what seems right for us and giving up the expectation that what happens will be exactly what we want.
What can I gain by giving up something that is harmful today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
If the only prayer you say in your whole life is "thank you," that would suffice. --Meister Eckhart
"An attitude of gratitude," we sometimes hear, will help us on our path. There certainly are enough things for us to worry about, grieve over, and complain about. They have their place. But as we mature and no longer use addictive escapes, we learn that joy can exist side by side with grief. Gratitude is a tonic for our self-pity. Saying "thank you" actually opens us to receive more of life's blessings, which sit there waiting for us to notice.
In a pleasant moment we can look around and say, "Aren't we lucky!" That's a kind of prayer, and it connects us with our Higher Power. No matter how painful or worrisome a day may be, we can be thankful for our growth. Gratitude is so simple we sometimes dismiss it while looking for a more complicated answer in our lives. We can say "thank you" for all the simple things like trees, cool air, food, and love between people. It is a risk to be so grateful. Who will be in control? Perhaps God.
God, thank you for all that comes to me without my efforts.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
We are all held in place by the pressure of the crowd around us. We must all lean upon others. Let us see that we lean gracefully and freely and acknowledge their support. --Margaret Collier Graham
We did not come into this world alone. And our voyage through this life is in concert with many others: some who directly aid us, while others seem to hinder our paths. We don't have full knowledge, however. We can't determine the many ways we are being helped to take the right steps, even by those who block our way for the moment.
Likewise, our presence is helping to pave the way for both the friends and the strangers we will encounter today, at work, on the street, at the meeting perhaps. We have all been charged, in this life, with a similar responsibility--to help one another fulfill our destinies. Our impatience with one another, our wavering love and acceptance of each other, at times our disavowal of our brothers and sisters comes because we fail to understand the necessary part we each play in the drama of one another's life.
In my personal drama, I am sharing the stage with everyone else I encounter today. I need a supporting cast. And I need applause. I will give it freely today.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Letting Go of Self Criticism
Look how far we've come!
It's good to focus on the task ahead, on what remains to be done. It's important to stop and feel pleased about what we've accomplished too.
Yes, it may seem that the change has been slow. At times, change is grueling. Yes, we've taken steps backward. But we're right where we're supposed to be. We're right where we need to be.
And we have come so far.
Sometimes by leaps, sometimes with tiny steps, sometimes kicking and screaming all the while, sometimes with sleeves rolled up and white knuckles, we've learned. Grown. Changed.
Look how far we've come.
Today, I will appreciate my progress. I will let myself feel good about what has been accomplished.


Today I let go of all things that keep me from growing on a spiritual path. Today I am willing to push aside all things that stand between me and love. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Take Time to Develop a Vision

As above, so below. First it happens in spirit. Then it manifests in the physical. Not the other way around.

First we see a vision. Our soul tells us through the words and eyes of our heart. Then the steps become clear and we see the order in which they should be taken. Then it is finished. By the time the vision has arrived, it is already, as some say, a done deal.

You waste so much time and effort when you try to accomplish something before you have envisioned it. Learn to let the vision come first. Take time to shape it in spirit before you try to shape it in physical form. If you can’t see something clearly, the vision may not be complete. Take the time you need to think about it, to let it come into focus, to let the vision take shape in your mind.

Operating from vision will guide us onto our highest path. It will also make our life and work much easier.

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More Language Of Letting Go

Open the door

I was having lunch with a friend at a restaurant one day when he realized he had either misplaced his keys or locked them in his car. We had taken my car to the restaurant. His car was at my house.

He went through all the denial and fussing most of us do when we realize we’ve locked ourselves out.

“Maybe I brought them into your house and left them on the table,” he said wistfully. “It’s okay though. I have an extra set in my… “He dug through his pockets. “Other pants.”

Game over.

He didn’t enjoy the rest of his lunch.

When we got back to the house, we looked for the keys inside for a few moments then walked out to his car. Sure enough, there they were– right on the dashboard. We walked around the car a few times.

“Maybe I should just call AAA,” he said. I offered to go get a coat hanger from the house. We walked around the car a few more times, peering longingly through the windows. You could almost touch the keys; they were that close.

I turned to go inside and get the hanger. That’s when I heard it. Popclicksqueek. I turned, and there was my friend standing triumphantly next to his car, keys in hand, a dorky smile plastered on his face.

“The door was unlocked,” he said.

So often we allow ourselves to feel like outsiders. We want to break into a new field or group but we feel we don’t know enough yet, that we may not be liked, that we may fail, or that we may succeed. So we stand outside wistfully looking at others and wishing we could unlock that door and join the group.

The door isn’t locked.

You belong here.

Open it and walk in.

God, help me remember that the only one keeping me an outsider is me. Help me open the door and join the group. Help me live my life.

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Creative Cuts
Editing Your Life

Our lives can be compared to an ongoing movie script over which we have complete creative control. Within us lies the power to examine what works or isn’t working in our lives and make “edits” to our life’s script, accordingly. Choosing to actively edit your life can be incredibly empowering. As you evolve, you have the choice to accept the script you’ve written thus far or edit it so you can create a life that fulfills you. You can cut out from your life’s script what is no longer working for you. Acknowledging that you are responsible for the experience you create gives you the ability to create the life you’ve always longed for.

Granted, editing your real life isn’t always as easy as erasing a line of text. If you’ve carried emotional baggage or held on to an unhealthy relationship for a long time, these may be difficult to edit out. But when you do cut out what isn’t working from your life, you’ll feel lighter and more alive. Editing out activities that you find stressful, disassociating yourself from people that drain your energy, and letting go of your emotional baggage are all beneficial cuts you can make. In the empty spaces that are left behind, you can add in anything you like. Just as you have the power to edit out negative situations or beliefs that you no longer wish to have as part of your life, you can now include the kinds of positive experiences, people, and beliefs that you would like to fill your life with. The manifestation of these thoughts and images as realities in your life will inevitably follow. As you make changes to your life, you can also add in the bits where you choose mo! re intimate, healthier relationships, seek out adventure over tedium, and are no longer negatively impacted by old experiences.

To begin editing your life, simply think about your positive and negative experiences. When you determine what parts of your life are no longer serving you, make the commitment to remove them – though, it is important to remember that there is no proper timing or way to do this, and patience and compassion for yourself are always important during this process. Then, ask yourself what has brought you profound bliss and consider how you can make those experiences and beliefs part of your life now. With a little editing, you’ll be able to clear out what is no longer serving you and make room in your life for more happiness, love, and wisdom. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

During our first days in The Program, we got rid of alcohol and pills. We had to get rid of our chemicals, for we knew they surely would have killed us. We got rid of the addictive substances, but we couldn’t get rid of our addictions until we took further action. So we also had to learn to toss self pity, self-justification, self-righteousness and self-will straight out the window. We had to get off the rickety ladder that supposedly led to money, property and prestige. And we had to take personal responsibility. To gain enough humility and self-respect to stay alive at all, we had to give up our most valued possessions — our ambition and our pride. Am i well rid of the weights and chains that once bound me?

Today I Pray

Ma I give credit to my Higher Power not only for removing my addiction, but for teaching me to remove my old demanding, pushy “self” from all my spiritual and earthly relationships. For all the things I have learned and unlearned, for my own faith and for the grace of God, I am fully and heartily thankful.

Today I Will Remember

Gratitude for the grace of God.

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One More Day

Trees and fields tell me nothing; men are my teachers – Plato

Our earliest teachers were our parents, and from them, if we were lucky, we learned unqualified love and acceptance and developed our religious beliefs. Later, trained professionals taught us specific subject matter. We also learned ethics from our instructors, our parents, and our house of worship.

A few of us may take issue with “trees and fields tell me nothing.” But then we realize that our appreciation of nature’s beauty was really taught and encouraged by our parents and teachers. We observe the glory of nature happening right before our eyes, but our understanding of life, growth, and death comes from our understanding of the teachings of people.

I will keep my mind open to learn so that I can make as many gains in learning as are available to me.

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Food For Thought

What Am I Avoiding Now?

If I am becoming preoccupied with thoughts of food and eating, I am probably avoiding something in the present, which troubles me. We compulsive overeaters have a long history of using food to avoid facing whatever is bothering us. Abstaining may not solve the problem, but at least we do not eat ourselves into a worse situation.

Sometimes we are aware of a difficult task that needs to be done, and we think we require extra food to fortify ourselves in order to accomplish the task. Remembering that excess food incapacitates rather than strengthens is essential to our recovery. A short-term euphoria is not worth the long-term anguish, which inevitably follows loss of control.

We are learning to turn to a Power greater than ourselves when we have problems that we formerly avoided or tried to solve by eating. Whatever our perplexity, God has the answer, if we will surrender our wills and listen for His guidance.

Teach me to trust You completely.

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One Day At A Time

VISION
“The greatest tragedy in life
is people who have sight but no vision.”
Helen Keller

The miracle of recovery has given me new vision! I lived for many years with eyes that viewed the world through fear, pain and resentment. These were the factors that shaded the lenses of my eyes. Because they clouded my entire perspective, they prevented me from seeing reality as it was. Instead, I lived in fear of the distorted realities of my world.

When I took my Fourth Step I began to see with new vision and clarity. It was amazing for me to realize how skewed my perception of life had been all those years. I discovered that my vision hadn’t been focused on the truth! The shades of this illness had cast many shadows upon reality and I had spent my life reacting to those shadows instead of responding to life.

I had years of experience looking at the world through illness, and I was not sure if I could really keep this new vision which was promised through recovery. I was a little worried that it would soon fade away into those old shadows … as had happened in other awakenings I had experienced.

As I continued to take the Steps, I found that my new vision not only remained, but grew broader and deeper every day. As I continue to work a daily Tenth, Eleventh and Twelfth Step and to practice these principles in all aspects of my life, I continue to celebrate life with the vision that recovery brings. This vision is one of deep joy, gratitude, serenity, and love!

One day at a time... .. . .
I will practice the Steps of recovery in all aspects of my life and I will continue to receive and share the gift of vision that recovery brings.
Cate

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet. Everyone knows about the others' alcoholic troubles. This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information. Among us, these are rare occurrences. We do talk about each other a great deal, but we almost always invariably temper such talk by a spirit of love and tolerance. - Pg. - 125 - The Family Afterward

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Now is the time to get into action and into the solution and stop being a part of your problem! Do this by remembering your last high, your last run, your last hopeless desperation. Then share that story with the next person you see and tell them how it led you to this new path of sobriety.

Show me the next person I am to share my story with.

Spiritual Transformation

Today, I see that to change my life I have to change myself. Nothing less than a spiritual transformation will allow me to experience my current life as an alive, serene and whole person. When I say that I would like world peace, first I will understand that without inner peace there will be no world peace. One of the ways in which I can serve the cause of humanity is to be, within myself, a genuinely spiritual person - respecting all sects and creeds, but standing on my own as a conduit of higher truth, recognizing that each person has equal access to that knowledge. I will look for truth today within myself rather than outside. I will not wait for peace to be handed to me as some sort of prize for good behavior but will do the inner work needed to achieve it.

I seek truth within myself.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Is your ideal to be clean and whole? If so, ask yourself: What sort of neighbor is a clean and sober person? What sort of family member is a clean and sober person? What sort of Twelve Step program will a clean and sober person work?

Sober is as sober does.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Recovery is contagious; we catch it from coffee cups.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I am willing to let go of all things that keep me from growing on a spiritual path. Today I am willing to push aside all things that stand between me and love.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

I was cool when I got to AA - If I'd have been any cooler I'd have frozen to death. - Eddie C.

[bluidkiti]

November 27

Daily Reflections

THE PERILS OF THE LIMELIGHT

In the beginning, the press could not understand our
refusal of all personal publicity. They were genuinely
baffled by our insistence upon anonymity. Then they got
the point. Here was something rare in the world -- a
society which said it wished to publicize its principles
and its work, but not its individual members. The press
was delighted with this attitude. Ever since, these
friends have reported A.A. with an enthusiasm which the
most ardent members would find hard to match.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 182

It is essential for my personal survival and that of the
Fellowship that I not use A.A. to put myself in the
limelight. Anonymity is a way for me to work on my humility.
Since pride is one of my most dangerous shortcomings, practicing
humility is one of the best ways to overcome it. The Fellowship of A.A.
gains worldwide recognition by its various methods of publicizing its
principles and its work, not by its individual members advertising
themselves. The attraction created by my changing attitudes and my
altruism contributes much more to the welfare of A.A. than
self-promotion.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

The way of A.A. is the way of sobriety, fellowship, service
and faith. Let us take up each one of these things and see if
our feet are truly on the way. The first and greatest to us
is sobriety. The others are built on sobriety as a foundation.
We could not have the others if we did not have sobriety. We
all come to A.A. to get sober, and we stay to help others get
sober. We are looking for sobriety first, last and all the
time. We cannot build any kind of decent life unless we stay
sober. Am I on the A.A. way?

Meditation For The Day

To truly desire to do God's will, therein lies happiness for
a human being. We start out wanting our own way. We want our
wills to be satisfied. We take and we do not give. Gradually
we find that we are not happy when we are selfish, so we begin
to make allowances for other peoples' wills. But this again
does not give us full happiness, and we begin to see that the
only way to be truly happy is to try to do God's will. In these
times of meditation, we seek to get guidance so that we can
find God's will for us.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may subordinate my will to the will of God.
I pray that I may be guided today to find His will for me.

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As Bill Sees It

Do It Our Way?, p. 329

In praying, our immediate temptation will be to ask for specific
solutions to specific problems, and for the ability to help other people
as we have already thought they should be helped. In that case, we
are asking God to do it our way. Therefore, we ought to consider
each request carefully to see what its real merit is.

Even so, when making specific requests, it will be well to add to each
one of them this qualification: ". . . if it be Thy will."

12 & 12, p. 102

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Walk In Dry Places

Nobody "OD's" on AA.
Balance
Do people really need daily AA meetings, perhaps even two or three a day? Frequent meeting attendance is usually considered beneficial in AA, but non-members may frown on the practice, especially if a person is neglecting other responsibilities in the meantime.
One thing to remember is that nobody can really "OD" on AA. The worst that can happen from attending so many meetings would be eventual boredom from too much of the same thing. But no harm can come form too much of what is essentially a good practice.
If a person is attending lots of meetings, this schedule may eventually be cut back to allow time for other activities. It's better, especially in early recovery, to attend too many meetings than too few. We also have to let each person decide how many meetings are required at any stage in his or her recovery.
I know that everyone needs a balanced life, but that cannot happen without secure recovery. Meetings are may best way of staying active in the fellowship.

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Keep It Simple

Keep It Simple
Life is not lost by dying; life is lost by minute, day by day, in all the thousands, small, uncaring ways.--- Stephen V. Benet
Our Twelve Step program promises us a new way of life. But most of us won’t just wake up one day with a new attitude. We only gain this new way of life if we get involved.
The Twelve Step are tools to build a new life. The more we use a tool, the easier it is to use. The same goes for the Twelve Steps, just as carpenters depend on their tools. If we only wait for the new way of life, it’ll never come. The quicker we get involved, the quicker we’ll get fixed.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me get involved. Help me build a new way of life.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll look for ways to use the Twelve Steps. If I have a problem, I’ll first stop and think of how the Twelve Steps can help me solve it.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Limited expectations yield only limited results. --Susan Laurson Willig
Schoolchildren perform according to the expectations their teachers have of them. Likewise, what we women achieve depends greatly on what we believe about ourselves, and too many of us have too little belief in ourselves. Perhaps we grew up in a negative household or had a non-supportive marriage. But we contributed, too, in our negative self-assessment. The good news is that it no longer needs to control us.
We can boost our own performance by lifting our own expectations, even in the absence of support from others. It may not be easy, but each of us is capable of changing a negative self-image to a positive one. It takes commitment to the program, a serious relationship with our higher power, and the development of positive, healthy relationships with others.
It's true, we can't control other people in our lives. And we can't absolutely control the outcome of any particular situation. But we can control our own attitudes. Interestingly, when we've begun tagging ourselves competent and capable, instead of inadequate, we find that other people and other situations become more to our liking, too.
I will be fair with myself. I can do what I need to do wherever I am today. Only I can hold myself down.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

We have elsewhere remarked how much better life is when lived on a spiritual plane. If God can solve the age-old riddle of alcoholism, He can solve your problems too. We wives found that, like everybody else, we were afflicted with pride, self-pity, vanity and all the things which go to make up the self-centered person; and we were not above selfishness or dishonesty. As our husbands began to apply spiritual principles in their lives, we began to see the desirability of doing so too.

p. 116

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

The A.A. woman made sure I had no more alcohol in the house. She was very tough on me for a long time. I went to meetings every day and started taking the steps. The First Step showed me that I was powerless over alcohol and anything else that threatened my sobriety or muddled my thinking. Alcohol was only a symptom of much deeper problems of dishonesty and denial. Now it was a matter of coming to grips with a Power greater than myself. That was very hard for me. How could all these white people even begin to think they could understand me? So they brought a sober Indian woman up to work with me for a day. That was a very powerful day. That Indian woman cut me no slack at all. I will never forget her. She convinced me I was not unique. She said that these white folks were the best thing that ever happened to me.

p. 467

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Four - "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves."

Therefore, thoroughness ought to be the watchword when taking inventory. In this connection, it is wise to write out our questions and answers. It will be an aid to clear thinking and honest appraisal. It will be the first tangible evidence of our complete willingness to move forward.

p. 54

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"Each day is a new life. Seize it. Live it."
--David Guy Powers

No man or woman of the humblest sort can really be strong, gentle and good, without
the world being better for it, without somebody being helped and comforted by the
very existence of that goodness.
--Alan Alda

"What appears to be your biggest problem in life may disguise your greatest
opportunity."
--Brian Tracy

Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul.
--Henry David Thoreau

"Take your problems to God, then take God to your problems."
--unknown

"Nothing changes if nothing changes."
--unknown

"Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?"
--unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

PREVARICATION

"Whenever science makes a
discovery, the devil grabs it
while the angels are debating
the best way to use it."
-- Alan Valentine

Sometimes we can spend so long deciding what to do that we miss an opportunity. We
can prevaricate to the point of impotence. Nowhere is this more true than in the
science of relationships. We see somebody that we like and we go home thinking
about what we could have said or done. We create happenings in our mind that
never happened in fact. We miss the spiritual opportunity of risk.

For years I used to be like this. I always thought that I was not good enough, not
important, less than other people: the syndrome of low self-esteem.

Today it is getting better. Part of my spiritual growth is reaching out to other people.
Today I make a point of saying "hello". Today I will ask for a telephone number,
invite people to dinner, risk a relationship.

Let me not debate myself into sickness and isolation.

************************************************** *********

Set me free from my prison that I may praise your Name. Then the righteous will
gather around me, because of Your goodness to me.
Psalm 142:7

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering
produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does
not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit,
whom he has given us.
Romans 3:3-5

For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of
yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, that
no one should boast.
Ephesians 2:8-9

Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the
LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!
Isaiah 30:18

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Daily Inspiration

To be truly successful, put your heart and soul into even the smallest of your tasks. Lord, help me live my life in different ways and by different means, but always with enthusiasm and commitment.

We are the only ones who can change how we think or how we act. Lord, help me make positive decisions so that life doesn't just happen to me.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Seeking God's Help

"At times during our recovery, the decision to ask for God's help is our greatest source of strength and courage."
Basic Text pg. 26

When we take the Third Step, we decide to allow a loving Higher Power to guide us and care for us in our daily lives. We make the decision to allow this guidance and care into our lives. Some of us believe that, once we've made the Third Step decision, God leads us; from that point on, it's just a matter of paying attention to where we are led.

The Third Step decision is an act of faith, and asking for God's help is a way of renewing that act of faith. Putting faith to work in our daily lives gives us all the courage and strength we need, because we know we have the help of a loving Higher Power. We trust that our needs will be met. We can tap into that faith and trust just by asking.

Just for today: I will remind myself that I'm not alone by asking my Higher Power for help each step of the way.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. --Albert Einstein
Albert Einstein knew in his heart that the source of all his knowledge was not himself, but a mystery--something or someone outside himself. And it left him in awe and wonder. He knew also that while genius may be ninety percent hard work and only ten percent inspiration, all the hard work in the world amounts to nothing without that outside, mysterious inspiration.
He was right. We can work hard and play hard. We can paint and draw and write and develop formulas all our lives, but none of it will be new or different unless we are open to inspiration from some power outside ourselves that also, somehow, is deep within us. To be really good at anything, whether it's playing baseball, designing fashion clothing, fixing an engine, or cooking, we must believe in some creative force that helps us excel. When we see that force at work, we stand in awe at the wonderful and mysterious gift we have been given.
How have I been inspired to discover something?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
The simplest questions are the most profound. Where were you born? Where is your home? Where are you going? What are you doing? --Richard Bach
As we examine our personal answers to these simple questions, we find profound truths about ourselves. We may have been born in more places than the place of our biological birth. Some of us might say, "I truly was born the day I first felt the nurturing love of another person in my life," or "My life began on the day I stood up to my father." Most of us began new lives when we walked into our first meeting to begin recovery.
If we think about where our home is or where we are going and what we are doing as spiritual questions, we may find some comforting answers. Perhaps the place where we find rest, peace, and comfort is our home. That may be in a moment of meditation rather than in a physical place. If we are headed toward a manhood of self-respect, the problems of today are only challenges along the way. As we simplify our lives and let the truth be on the surface, we find profound meaning.
Today, I will keep my attention on the basics in my life.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Limited expectations yield only limited results. --Susan Laurson Willig
Schoolchildren perform according to the expectations their teachers have of them. Likewise, what we women achieve depends greatly on what we believe about ourselves, and too many of us have too little belief in ourselves. Perhaps we grew up in a negative household or had a non-supportive marriage. But we contributed, too, in our negative self-assessment. The good news is that it no longer needs to control us.
We can boost our own performance by lifting our own expectations, even in the absence of support from others. It may not be easy, but each of us is capable of changing a negative self-image to a positive one. It takes commitment to the program, a serious relationship with our higher power, and the development of positive, healthy relationships with others.
It's true, we can't control other people in our lives. And we can't absolutely control the outcome of any particular situation. But we can control our own attitudes. Interestingly, when we've begun tagging ourselves competent and capable, instead of inadequate, we find that other people and other situations become more to our liking, too.
I will be fair with myself. I can do what I need to do wherever I am today. Only I can hold myself down.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
We can Trust Ourselves
For many of us, the issue is not whether we can trust another person again; it's whether we can trust our own judgment again.
"The last mistake I made almost cost me my sanity," said one recovering woman who married a sex addict. "I can't afford to make another mistake like that."
Many of us have trusted people, who went on to deceive, abuse, manipulate, or otherwise exploit us because we trusted them. We may have found these people charming, kind, and decent. There may have been a small voice that said, "No - something's wrong." Or we may have been comfortable with trusting that person and shocked when we found our instincts were wrong.
The issue may then reverberate through our life for years. Our trust in others may have been shaken, but our trust in ourselves may have been shattered worse.
How could something feel so right, flow so well, and be such a total mistake? We may wonder. How can I ever trust my selection process again, when it showed itself to be so faulty?
We may never have the answers. I believe I needed to make certain "mistakes" to learn critical lessons I'm not certain I would have otherwise learned. We cannot let our past interfere with our ability to trust ourselves. We cannot afford to function with fear.
If we are always making the wrong decision in business or in love, we may need to learn why we insist on defeating ourselves.
But most of us do improve. We learn. We grow from our mistakes. Slowly, in increments, our relationships improve. Our business choices improve. Our decisions about how to handle situations with friends or children improve. We benefit from our mistakes. We benefit from our past. And if we have made mistakes, we needed to make them in order to learn along the way.
Today, I will let go of my fears about trusting myself because I have made mistakes in the past. I understand that these fears only serve to impair my judgment today. I will give my past, even my mistakes, validity by accepting and being grateful for it all. I will strive to see what I've gained from my mistakes. I will try to look at all my good decisions too. I will keep a watchful eye for improvement, for overall progress, in my life.


Today I choose to stay in the reality of my life and feel all there is to feel. I am willing to feel the pain so that I can feel the joy.
--Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

Forgiveness Isn’t too Much to Ask

Is your heart blocked? Are you experiencing a barricade you can’t get around in a particular relationship? Forgiveness is a delicate, sometimes difficult subject, but once in a while that’s what we need to ask for.

Part of being clear, and one of our powers, is the ability and ask for what we need from others, from the universe, from God, even from ourselves. We may be extremely skilled at identifying when we need more time with someone, more money, more attention, or a different type of communication. But as proficient as we may have become at asking for some of what we need, we may still find it difficult to ask for forgiveness.

It is one thing to tell a person we’re sorry. It is another to be intimate and bold enough to recognize the damage that comes when forgiveness hasn’t occured. Being unforgiven can block the kindest and warmest heart. It can destroy the most precious, beautiful, passionate, spiritual relationship. It can keep guilt lingering in the air. It can cause people to go away from each other.

Muster your forces. Prepare yourself if you must. Then take a risk, one of the greatest risks you’ll be asked to take. Put your cards on the table. Say you’re sorry, say it from the heart. Then don’t get defensive, ruffle your feathers, or get mad. Ask for forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not too much to ask for, if forgiveness is what you need.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Flex your wings

Walking in the hills of Southern California, I came across a high meadow bursting with the movement of hundreds of moths. I stood for a few moments and drank in the scene, watching them dance lightly around me. There were so many of them I could actually hear their wings beating in the still air.

I walked further along and saw a caterpillar crawling along the ground. I looked more closely and saw that the tiny creature had two small but useless wings protruding from its back. At first I thought that it must have been a deformity, that this poor worm would be forced to spend its days crawling, never able to fly, but all the while having wings. Then as I walked further along, I saw another caterpillar– this one with slightly larger wings. It was slowly flexing its new appendages, looking anxiously at the sky. These moths grew their wings gradually, without the aid of a cocoon to protect them throughout the transformation. They just sprouted their wings right out there for the whole world to see.

We each have different levels of freedom. What I think of as a box might be unthinkable freedom for you today. In the future, when you look back at your life, you may be amazed at the levels of freedom into which you have naturally grown. Perhaps you are looking around today at the freedom of others in awe and envy. “I could never do that,” you might say.

Yes, you can.

And you might.

Feel those wings on your back? They’re there. And they’re growing every day– whether you’re flying yet or not.

Robert Thurman wrote, “The great thing about the horizon of infinity is that there is no limit to how amazing you can become.”

God, help me flex my wings. Teach me how amazing I can become.

*************************************

One of a Kind
The Black Sheep by Madisyn Taylor

When we move beyond comparisons and accept our differences, we appreciate the significance of our upbringing and socialization in each of our unique life's journey.

Many of us have had an experience in which we felt like the lone black sheep in a vast sea of white sheep. For some of us, however, this sense of not belonging runs more deeply and spans a period of many years. It is possible to feel like the black sheep in families and peer groups that are supportive, as well as in those that are not. Even if we receive no overt criticism regarding our values, there will likely be times when it seems that relatives and friends are humoring us or waiting for us to grow out of a phase. Sometimes we may even think we have been adopted because we are so different from our family members. These feelings are not a sign that we have failed in some way to connect with others. Rather, they should be perceived as the natural result of our willingness to articulate our individuality.

Many black sheep respond to the separateness they feel by pulling back from the very people to whom they might otherwise feel closest and embracing a different group with whom they enjoy a greater degree of commonality. But if you feel that your very nature has set you apart from your peers and relatives, consider that you chose long ago to be raised by a specific family and to come together with specific people so that you could have certain experiences that would contribute to your ongoing evolution. You may be much more sensitive than the people around you or more artistic, aware, spiritual, or imaginative. The disparate temperament of your values and those of your family or peers need not be a catalyst for interpersonal conflict. If you can move beyond comparisons and accept these differences, you will come to appreciate the significant role your upbringing and socialization have played in your life's unique journey.

In time, most black sheep learn to embrace their differences and be thankful for those aspects of their individuality that set them apart from others. We cannot expect that our peers and relatives will suddenly choose to embrace our values and offer us the precise form of support we need. But we can acknowledge the importance of these individuals by devoting a portion of our energy to keeping these relationships healthy while continuing to define our own identities apart from them. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

The Program shows us how to transform the pipe-dreams of our past into reality and a true sense of purpose, together with a growing consciousness of the power of God in our lives. It’s alright to keep our head in the clouds with Him, we’re taught, but our feet should remain firmly planted here on earth. Here’s where other people are; here’s where our work must be accomplished. Do I see anything incompatible between spirituality and a useful life in the here and now?

Today I Pray

May my new “reality” include not only the nuts and bolts and pots and pans of daily lviing, but also my spiritual realty, my growing knowledge of the presence of God. May this new reality have room, too, for my dreams — not the drug-induced, mind-drifting fantasies of the past or the presents of my delusions — but the products of a healthy imagination. May I respect these dreams, anchor them in earth’s possibilities and turn them into useful creativity.

Today I Will Remember

Heaven has a place in the here-and-now.

*************************************

One More Day

Bitterness imprisons life; love releases it.
– Harry Emerson Fosdick

We sometimes waste far too much energy licking old wounds, nursing old hurts. Harboring bitterness only causes us pain. It folds all our feelings into a tight little package and keeps them hidden from sight.

Moving from bitter to loving feelings doesn’t happen overnight, but it does happen when we nurture ourselves and open ourselves to others. Letting friends and family help is one way to begin. Soon we will remember how wonderful and unthreatening love feels. Outgoing, warm, and trusting feelings flow through us toward others. We can harness our love and use it for emotional recovery. Eventually, we are freed of unnecessary pain. We are learning once again to love kin an unqualified way — and to love ourselves.

I do not need to be imprisoned by bitterness. I can set myself free.

************************************

Food For Thought

One Bite Means a Binge

By this time; we know that we do not overeat moderately. One extra compulsive bite sooner or later becomes a binge. Keeping this fact firmly planted in our consciousness prevents us from deluding ourselves into disaster. For us, there is abstinence or there is chaos. Nothing in between.

Having proved this fact over and over again, we must avoid at all costs the insanity that makes us think we can handle one small extra bite. Our only sure defense against such inexplicable insanity is a Power greater than ourselves. Alone, we cannot control what we eat and we cannot manage our lives.

Each day we begin by admitting to God our powerlessness over our compulsion, and we ask for His control. Whenever we are tempted or overwhelmed, we release our whole selves into His care and protection. At the end of the day, we give thanks for the Power that keeps us from taking the one small, disastrous bite.

Deliver me from the bite that means a binge.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ NEW BEGINNINGS ~
There will come a time when you believe everything is finished.
That will be the beginning.
Louis L'Amour

During my life I've always found it hard to start anything. I don't know whether it comes from being a compulsive overeater, but I do know that I took my time in starting a recovery program. Maybe it was a fear that, if I didn't succeed, I could never start over.

Luckily, this is a very forgiving program. If I slip, I can get up and start over. I don't have to stay down. In fact, I can be down, but I can never be counted out, because all I need to do is begin again. My Higher Power helps me stay on track, and it comforts me to know that, if I fall, I can be picked up and allowed to continue my journey to recovery.

One day at a time . . .
I will remain "higher powered" and start over if I need to.
Jeff

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

The classification of alcoholics seems most difficult, and in much detail is outside the scope of this book. There are, of course, the psychopaths who are emotionally unstable. We are all familiar with this type. They are over-remorseful and make many resolutions, but never a decision. - Pg. xxx - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Stick with the winners and hang with the gods' and you'll see the light at the end of the tunnel. Sticking with the winners means to only associate with clean and sober people in the program and going to meetings is hanging with the gods.

Grant me the good sense to go to a meeting every day for 90 days and socialize with people on the path of recovery.

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Stick with the winners and hang with the gods' and you'll see the light at the end of the tunnel. Sticking with the winners means to only associate with clean and sober people in the program and going to meetings is hanging with the gods.

Grant me the good sense to go to a meeting every day for 90 days and socialize with people on the path of recovery.

Becoming Real

Today, I let go and become real. I know that by holding on too tightly, I squeeze the life out of myself and those around me. Recovery has taught me to value being authentic above being something or someone. Recovery is a process of facing and removing those obstacles that have been in the way on my road back to myself. It has been my willingness to risk and trust that my Higher Power will hold me that has brought me to life again. Now it is time for me to live each day as it comes and give some of what I have received. So many people have helped me along the way - it is also part of my recovery to share what I have learned, in case it might help someone else.

I am open to life and all it holds.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Positive clean thoughts of ourselves are a must. Picture yourself speaking at meetings, greeting newcomers, laughing, sponsoring others, and holding your head high. Clean and sober thoughts help counter years of drunk and dirty thoughts.

I picture myself laughing and sharing with others.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Recovery is a journey, not a destination. May your journey be long.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I choose to stay in the reality of my life and feel all there is to feel. I am willing to feel the pain so that I can feel the joy.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Resentments are like replay cameras at football games; 'Let's take a another look at that in slow motion and close-up - Oh yes, that was worse than I thought.. let's look at that from another angle!' - Joe McQ.

[bluidkiti]

November 28

Daily Reflections

ATTRACTION, NOT PROMOTION

Through many painful experiences, we think we have arrived
at what that policy ought to be. It is the opposite in many
ways of usual promotional practice. We found that we had to
rely upon the principle of attraction rather than promotion.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 180-81

While I was drinking I reacted with anger, self-pity and
defiance against anyone who wanted to change me. All I wanted
then was to be accepted by another human simply as I was and,
curiously, that is what I found in A.A. I became the custodian
of this concept of attraction, which is the principle of our
Fellowship's public relations. It is by attraction that I can
best reach the alcoholic who still suffers. I thank God for
having given me the attraction of a well-planned and
established program of Steps and Traditions. Through humility
and the support of my fellow sober members, I have been able
to practice the A.A. way of life through attraction, not
promotion.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

The A.A. way is the way of sobriety. A.A. is known everywhere
as a method that has been successful with alcoholics. Doctors,
psychiatrists and clergymen have had some success. Some men
and women have got sober all by themselves. We believe that A.A.
is the most successful and happiest way to sobriety. And yet
A.A. is not wholly successful. Some are unable to achieve
sobriety and some slip back into alcoholism after they have had
some measure of sobriety. Am I deeply grateful to have found A.A.?

Meditation For The Day

Gratitude to God is the theme of Thanksgiving Day. The pilgrims
gathered to give thanks to God for their harvest, which was
pitifully small. When we look around us at all the things we
have today, how can we help being grateful to God? Our families,
our homes, our friends, our A.A. fellowship; all these things
are free gifts of God to us. "But for the grace of God," we would
not have them.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be very grateful today. I pray that I may
not forget where I might be but for the grace of God.

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As Bill Sees It

To Grow Up, p. 330

Those adolescent urges that so many of us have for complete approval,
utter security, and perfect romance--urges quite appropriate to age
seventeen--prove to be an impossible way of life at forty-seven or
fifty-seven.

Since A.A. began, I've taken huge wallops in all these areas because of
my failure to grow up, emotionally and spiritually.

<< << << >> >> >>

As we grow spiritually, we find that our old attitudes toward instinctual
drives need to undergo drastic revisions. Our demands for emotional
security and wealth, for personal prestige and power all have to be
tempered and redirected.

We learn that the full satisfaction of these demands cannot be the sole
end and aim of our lives. We cannot place the cart before the horse, or
we shall be pulled backward into disillusionment. But when we are
willing to place spiritual growth first--then and only then do we have a
real chance to grow in healthy awareness and mature love.

1. Grapevine, January 1958
2. 12 & 12, p. 114

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Walk In Dry Places

Spaces in Togetherness
Friendship
One of the beautiful aspects of AA is the bonding that develops among members. We truly do achieve a closeness with some people that is unlike anything we ever had before.
The danger in such friendships is that we may become too close in some ways. Without realizing it, we may be making too many demands on others' time. This can become suffocating to them and eventually detrimental to the friendship.
In such situations, we need to remember the words of Kahlil Gibran; "Let there be spaces in your togetherness." However, close we feel to others, we must allow them their space.
We should also remember to respect others' privacy as well as their anonymity. AA should give us close friendships, but not to the point of suffocation.
I'll remember today not to overstep my boundaries in any friendship. There must be spaces in our togetherness.

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Keep It Simple

The purpose of freedom is to create it for others.---Bernard Malamud
Sobriety is freedom. With this freedom, we have a responsibility to help other addicts who still suffer. The program tells us this in Step Twelve. We do this by telling our stories and offering hope.
We must be ready to care, to give ourselves. This is what spirituality is about. When we help others, we prepare the road for those who enter the program after us.
Tradition Five of the Twelve Traditions says, “Each group has but one primary purpose---to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.” It means we get better by helping others.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me create more freedom. Bring me to where I’m needed. Help me carry the message well.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think of ways I can help the addict who still suffers. Then I’ll chose one way I can be of help. I’ll talk with my sponsor about it, and I’ll follow through with my plan.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

The idea of God is different in every person. The joy of my recovery was to find God within me. --Angela L. Wozniak
The program promises peace. Day by day, step by step, we move closer to it. Each time we clearly are touched by someone else, and each time we touch another, carries us closer to a realization of God's presence, in others, in ourselves, in all experiences. The search for God is over, just as soon as we realize the Spirit is as close as our thoughts, our breath.
Coming to believe in a greater power brings such relief to us in our daily struggles. And on occasion we still fight for control to be all-powerful ourselves, only to realize that the barriers we confront are of our own making. We are on easy street, just as soon as we choose to let God be our guide in all decisions, large and small.
The program's greatest gift to us is relief from anxiety, the anxiety that so often turned us to booze, or pills, or candy. Relief is felt every time we let go of the problem that's entrapped us and wait for the comfort and guidance God guarantees.
God's help is mine just as quickly as I fully avail myself of it. I will let go of today's problems.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

At first, some of us did not believe we needed this help. We thought, on the whole, we were pretty good women, capable of being nicer if our husbands stopped drinking. But it was a silly idea that we were too good to need God. Now we try to put spiritual principles to work in every department of our lives. When we do that, we find it solves our problems too; the ensuing lack of fear, worry and hurt feelings is a wonderful thing. We urge you to try our program, for nothing will be so helpful to your husband as the radically changed attitude toward him which God will show you how to have. Go along with you husband if you possibly can.

p. 116-117

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

"Where would you be without them?" she asked. "What are the alternatives? You got any better ideas for yourself? How many Indians do you know who are going to help you sober up?" At the time, I couldn't think of any. I surrendered behind the tears of no answers and decided to do it their way. I found the Power greater than myself to be the magic above the heads of the people in the meetings. I chose to call that magic Great Spirit.

p. 467

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."

All of A.A.'s Twelve Steps ask us to go contrary to our natural desires . . . they all deflate our egos. When it comes to ego deflation, few Steps are harder to take than Five. But scarcely any Step is more necessary to longtime sobriety and peace of mind than this one.

p. 55

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Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
--Cindy Clabough

"It's what you learn after you know it all that counts."
--Jean Rostand

"The first step to knowledge is to know that we are ignorant."
--Lord David Cecil

Correction does much, but encouragement does more.
--Goethe

He who knows the precepts by heart, but fails to practice them,
Is like unto one who lights a lamp and then shuts his eyes.
--Nagarjuna

The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.
--Joseph Joubert

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

CERTAINTY

"The certainties of one age are
the problems of next."
-- R. H. Tawney

I was a religious bigot. I did not know that I was a bigot, but now I see how closed and
narrow my thinking was. I craved for certainty because I felt it would give me security
and happiness but it never did. I argued dogmas that I did not believe; the plight of the
unhappy hypocrite!

Today I live only in the certainty of the day. Today I know that what worked for me
yesterday will work for me today if I am open to love, truth, honesty and change.
Change is not necessarily "difference" if I see it as part of a process rather than an
event. Yesterday is linked to today, and together they forge tomorrow. The one thing
of which I can be certain is change. The God of Truth is revealed in the change;
the acceptance of this fact is spirituality.

May I continue to grow in the spiritual life by my continued desire to change and be
tolerant.

************************************************** *********

"But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with
Christ even when we were dead in transgressions--it is by grace you have been
saved."
Ephesians 2:4-5

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my
yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find
rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30

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Daily Inspiration

Tranquility lies in self-improvement. Lord, help me to worry less about the faults of others and use my energy to enhance my own strengths and eliminate my weaknesses.

If you have more than you need, but still feel it isn't enough, then you are poor. Lord, may I take time to recognize and enjoy my blessings.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Being Ourselves

"To be truly humble is to accept and honestly try to be ourselves."
Basic Text pg. 35

Humility is a puzzling concept. We know a lot about humiliation, but humility is a new idea. It sounds suspiciously like groveling, bowing, and scraping. But that's not what humility is at all. True humility is, simply, acceptance of who we are.

By the time we reach a step that uses the word "humbly;" we have already started to put this principle into practice. The Fourth Step gives us an opportunity to examine who we really are, and the Fifth Step helps us accept that knowledge.

The practice of humility involves accepting our true nature, honestly being ourselves. We don't have to grovel or abase ourselves, nor must we try to appear smarter, wealthier, or happier than we really are. Humility simply means we drop all pretense and live as honestly as we can.

Just for today: I will allow knowledge of my true nature to guide my actions. Today, I will face the world as myself.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
for most this amazing day . . .
. . . for everything
which is natural which is infinite
which is yes.
--e. e. cummings
Let us be thankful today for all simple obvious things: for the sun's rising this morning without our having to awaken it; for another good turn the earth makes today without expecting anything in return; for our ability to know right and wrong by heart. Let us give thanks for all small things that mean the world to us; for bread and cheese and clean running water; for our ability to call our enemies our friends, to forgive even ourselves; for our own bodies, however sagging and worn, which insist on continuing for at least another day.
How much ordinary daily good do I take for granted?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Our job gives most of us a clear role.... Although we may feel relatively lost at home, we know who we are and what to do at work. --Pierre Mornell
Most men have become well adapted to the workaday world. Even if our jobs seem like drudgery, they provide us with a place and a routine, which define us. Many of us have welcomed the end of a weekend or a vacation because we could go back to our jobs and definite roles. This situation has many drawbacks. For one thing, if we are out of work, we may feel adrift. Furthermore, if we have defined ourselves only as breadwinners, we have probably missed the benefits of closeness in our families. Some of us have even said, "I feel like I'm nothing but a meal ticket."
A good job does have value, but we can also grow by giving more of ourselves in our less clear roles at home. It is healing to just "hang around" with our families and friends and to simply let relationships develop. The personal, familiar relationships that don't depend on jobs and roles let us be comfortably human.
I am thankful for the humanizing effect of my relationships at home.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The idea of God is different in every person. The joy of my recovery was to find God within me. --Angela L. Wozniak
The program promises peace. Day by day, step by step, we move closer to it. Each time we clearly are touched by someone else, and each time we touch another, carries us closer to a realization of God's presence, in others, in ourselves, in all experiences. The search for God is over, just as soon as we realize the Spirit is as close as our thoughts, our breath.
Coming to believe in a greater power brings such relief to us in our daily struggles. And on occasion we still fight for control to be all-powerful ourselves, only to realize that the barriers we confront are of our own making. We are on easy street, just as soon as we choose to let God be our guide in all decisions, large and small.
The program's greatest gift to us is relief from anxiety, the anxiety that so often turned us to booze, or pills, or candy. Relief is felt every time we let go of the problem that's entrapped us and wait for the comfort and guidance God guarantees.
God's help is mine just as quickly as I fully avail myself of it. I will let go of today's problems.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Back to the Steps
Go back to the Steps. Go back to a Step
When we don't know what to do next, when we feel confused, upset, distraught, at the end of our rope, overwhelmed, full of self will, rage, or despair, go back to the Steps.
No matter what situation we are facing, working a Step will help. Focus on one, trust your instincts, and work it.
What does it mean to work a Step? Think about it. Meditate on it. Instead of focusing on the confusion, the problems, or the situation causing our despair or rage, focus on the Step.
Think about how that Step might apply. Hold on to it. Hang on as tightly as we hang on to our confusion or the problem.
The Steps are a solution. They work. We can trust them to work.
We can trust where the Steps will lead us.
When we don't know what step to take next, take one of the Twelve.
Today, I will concentrate on using the Twelve Steps to solve problems and keep me in balance and harmony. I will work a Step to the best of my ability. I will learn to trust the Steps, and rely on them instead of on my protective, codependent behaviors.


Today I know that I am nothing alone. I am willing to let go of any struggle that keeps me on a path of doing things my way. I know that all I have to do is ask for help and it is there for me. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Bask in Self-Love

The commitment to love ourselves may be a decision we only need to make once, but we may need to take frequent action to implement that choice. It’s so easy to fall into that place of not loving and accepting ourselves. But it can become just as easy to decide to return to the place. We may need to do it daily, weekly, or whenever we begin a new part of our journey, especially a part that frightens or challenges us.

What would feel good? What would bring healing? What would energize or comfort you? And what purpose is to be fulfilled by depriving yourself of that?

However often we need to do it, we can return to that place of self-love. Each time we do it, it becomes easier. Each time we do it, we see the rewards of self-love, enhanced creativity, clearer decisions, a stronger connection to the Divine, and a more fulfilling connection to the world around us.

When we love ourselves, it becomes easier to correct our mistakes, admit our wrongs, share our deepest feelings, and love others. Our spirit dances, thrives. Self-love energizes us. It attracts more love. The universe responds directly and immediately to our choice to love ourselves.

Accept yourself. Love yourself just as you are. Your finest work, your best moments, your joy, peace, and healing come when you love yourself. You give a great gift to the world when you do that. You give others permission to do the same to love themselves.

Revel in self-love. Roll in it. Bask in it, as you would the sunshine.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

It’s an opportunity

In order to develop a strong sense of the preciousness of human life, it must connect to one’s belief system. The belief system doesn’t need to be the Buddhist karmic system, but it has to be one that is critically aware of the uniqueness and special nature of this life form.
–Robert Thurman, Circling the Sacred Mountain

Do you see it? Do you see what a special, precious opportunity each day of your life is.

Look more closely. See all the lessons you can learn. See how you can participate in your growth. See how carefully God holds your hand, guides you down the right path, offers just the right words and opportunities at the right moments, sends just the right people your way.

You can feel. You can touch. You can agoniize in despair and giggle with glee. You can make jokes. You can cry at movies. You can weep in bed at night. Then get up the next day refreshed.

You can taste an orange, a lemon, a mango– and describe in detail the difference in each of those tastes. You can smell a forest of pine tree. You can hold a friend’s hand and feel how he trembles because he’s afraid.

You can stumble and fall and feel abandoned, then get up and suddenly, in one moment, understand that lesson you’ve been trying to learn. You can jump out of airplanes, feel the smoothness of your lover’s back, and hold your child to your breast.

You can wait and thank God later.

But you might as well thank God now.

Maybe the best way to thank God is by living your life fully today.

God, help me to use this opportunity, this life that I have been given to the best of my ability every day.

*************************************

The Understanding Underneath
Experiences with Multiple Meanings by Madisyn Taylor

The refined impression you glean from your experiences after contemplating their significance can add a new richness and texture to your life.

Though we humans are self-aware, we nonetheless cannot distance ourselves from the world around us and have a natural tendency to ascribe meaning to all that we experience. The significance we perceive in our experiences is rooted in our observation of patterns as they relate to ourselves. One situation has the power to teach us about life because it exposes us to something unfamiliar. Another touches our emotions deeply by enabling us to see how fortunate we are. Yet our initial impressions of an experience may not wholly reveal the true significance of that occurrence because our full response to an experience is like an onion with many layers that all have disparate meanings. Consider that a sunrise may stun us visually while simultaneously evoking memories of childhood and reminding us that each new day is a rebirth.

If you take the time to examine your experiences closely, you will discover that your original impressions may only be a part of a larger story of significance. Peeling away the layers of an event or incident can be a fun and interesting process if you allow it. To begin, relive your experience in your mind’s eye and from multiple perspectives if possible. Your interpretation of any situation is based not only on facts but also on feelings, beliefs, and your values. As you ruminate upon your experience, spend a few moments contemplating how you felt when it began and how your feelings had changed by its end. Ask yourself what abstractions, if any, it awakened in your mind. If an experience stirs up questions within your soul, it may be that in striving to answer them a new layer of meaning may reveal itself to you.

The significance of an experience may remain hidden to you for some time. The meaning of an event can change when viewed from another context or may only become apparent after intense meditation. An incident that seemed superficial may unexpectedly touch us deeply later in our lives. If you take a truly open-minded approach to your examination of each new level and do not shy away from revelations that could prove painful, you will learn much about your relationship to the world around you. And the refined impression you glean from your experiences after contemplating their significance can add a new richness and texture to your life. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Our faith in god’s power — at work in us and in our lives — doesn’t relieve us of responsibility. Instead, our faith strengthens our efforts, makes us confident and assured, and enables us to act decisively and wisely. We’re no longer afraid to make decisions; we’re not afraid to take the steps that seem called for in the proper handling of given situations. Do I believe that God is at work beyond my human efforts, and that my faith and trust in Him will bring forth results for exceeding my expectations?

Today I Pray

May my trust in my Higher Power never falter. May my my faith in that Power continue to shore up my optimism, my confidence, my belief in my own decision-making. May I never shut my eyes to the wonder of God’s work or discount the wisdom of His solutions.

Today I Will Remember

Our hope is ages past, our help for years to come.

*************************************

One More Day

Time deals gently only with those who take it gently.
–Anatole France

There have been times when we’ve taken our lives too seriously. For whatever reasons — family problems, money problems, health problems, — we’ve let those concerns distort all the events of the day into sad or personally threatening experiences. When we’ve been preoccupied with negative thoughts, it’s probably been difficult to see good possibilities.

Life magically becomes better, easier, when we take it gently in manageable segments. Problems may seem insurmountable if we insist on seeing them stretch into the coming months or years. But when we challenge ourselves to live in this day, the time treats us more gently by giving us a clearer picture of what we must deal with in this smaller segment of time.

Today, I will concentrate only on the things that must be dealt with in these twenty-four hours.

************************************

Food For Thought

A Strong Father

Many of us understand God in terms of a father, one on whom we can rely no matter what the situation. Our biological father may have been a tyrant or a pal, remote or accessible, firm or weak. However much we loved him and depended on him, he was only a person and not infallible.

For recovery from compulsive overeating, we need a source of strength to which we may turn in any emergency. We require a Power to lean on through the minor ups and downs of every day. Though our families and friends support us, their assistance is not enough. They can provide neither the control nor the sustenance, which we need in order to recover from our illness.

The firm, unfailing guidance which we require comes from our Higher Power. If we are willing to again become as children and cast ourselves on God without reservation, we shall receive His support. It is His Power that frees us from our false dependency on food.

Be for us a strong Father, we pray.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

~ GOODNESS ~
Above all, let us never forget that an act of goodness
is in itself an act of happiness.
Count Maurice Maeterlinck

While in the disease, most of the goodness I tried to do was for ulterior motives. It was only in recovery that I learned to give unselfishly and without strings to help another. In doing so, I have found happiness beyond measure. I can create my own happiness in the service of my Higher Power and other compulsive overeaters. I can make the promise of a "new happiness and a new freedom" come true.

One Day at a Time . . .
I will do acts of goodness.
~ Judy N. ~

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

There is the type of man who is unwilling to admit that he cannot take a drink. He plans various ways of drinking. He changes his brand or his environment. There is the type who always believes that after being entirely free from alcohol for a period of time he can take a drink without danger. There is the manic-depressive type, who is, perhaps, the least understood by his friends, and about whom a whole chapter could be written.

Then there are types entirely normal in every respect except in the effect alcohol has upon them. They are often able, intelligent, friendly people. - Pg. xxx - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

We may be asked to make many difficult decisions about our new life, facing divorce, jail time, loss of our children. Not all of the results will be perfect. We gather the information that we can, ask for advice from professionals, practice principles as best we can and then trust in the process. We do our best; no one expects perfection.

Not all my decisions will turn out the way I expect and that doesn't make them wrong. I do the best I can and trust in the process.

One Foot in Front of the Other

Today, all I have to do is live the next hour as well as I can. I will not get ahead of myself. I cannot be anywhere but right where I am. When I allow myself to be here now, to live in the present fully and freely, the rest of life takes care of itself. So few people live in the moment, that in itself will make me rare. That will make me someone I feel good about being and others can enjoy being around. When I am in the moment, the next right action reveals itself. When I align my will with the will of my Higher Power, I become one with diving purpose and I connect with the spirituality of life.

I surrender to the path

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

According to the martial arts, Aikido, the best way to win a fight is not to be there in the first place. Think of this the next time you are invited to a bar, to ride in vehicle with a pot smoker, or to celebrate at the office party.

My best path to cease fighting anybody or anything, is not to be in the ring in the first place.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

A sure way to set yourself up for a 'slip' is to be convinced that others will slip if they don't listen to you.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know that I am nothing alone. I am willing to let go of any struggle that keeps me on a path of doing things my way. I know that all I have to do is ask for help and it is there for me.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

The measure of my anxiety is the measure of my distance from God. - Unknown origin.

[bluidkiti]

November 29

Daily Reflections

ACTIVE GUARDIANS

To us, however, it represents far more than a sound
public relations policy. It is more than a denial of
self-seeking. This Tradition is a constant and practical
reminder that personal ambition has no place in A.A.
In it, each member becomes an active guardian of our
Fellowship.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 183

The basic concept of humility is expressed in the
Eleventh Tradition: it allows me to participate
completely in the program in such a simple, yet profound,
manner; it fulfills my need to be an integral part of a
significant whole. Humility brings me closer to the
actual spirit of togetherness and oneness, without which
I could not stay sober. In remembering that every member
is an example of sobriety, each one living the Eleventh
Tradition, I am able to experience freedom because each
one of us is anonymous.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

The A.A. way is the way of sobriety, and yet there are
slips. Why do these slips occur? Why don't we all accept
A.A. and stay sober from then on? There are many reasons,
but it has been proven without exception that once we have
become alcoholics we can never drink successfully again.
This has never been disproved by any case we know of. Many
alcoholics have tried drinking after a period of sobriety
from a few days to a few years and no one that we know of
has been successful in becoming a normal drinker. Could I be
the only exception to this rule?

Meditation For The Day

"We are gathered together in Thy name." First, we are
gathered together, bound by a common loyalty to God and
to each other. Then, when this condition has been fulfilled,
God is present with us. Then, when God is there and one
with us, we voice a common prayer. Then it follows that our
prayer will be answered according to God's will. Then, when
our prayer is answered, we are bound together in a lasting
brotherhood of the spirit.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be loyal to God and my fellow men. I pray
that my life today may be lived close to His and theirs.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

The Great Fact, p. 331

We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to
you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do
each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your
own house is in order.

But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven't got. See to it
that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to
pass for you and countless others. This is the great fact for us.

To the Newcomer:
Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to
Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give
freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the
fellowship of the spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you
trudge the road of happy destiny.

May God bless you and keep you--until then.

Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 164

************************************************** *********

Walk In Dry Places

None are obligated to us.
Service
Service is considered an essential part of AA. As Dr. Bob said, AA is really love and service.
If this service is delivered in the right spirit..... the true AA spirit.... no sense of obligation is crated. If others feel they are incurring an obligation, they will resent us in time. Moreover, our carrying of the message will be flawed.
The proper way to look at service is to see it as something we perform for our own benefit. While we hope that it will benefit others, that does not have to happen in order for us to benefit. Our good comes from the giving of SERVICE, not the measurement of its results for others. No one is obligated to us; nor does anyone have the right to complain if our services did not help. We serve entirely for our own benefit.
For my own good, I'll give service today. I want to be effective for others, but I realize my real purpose is to help myself.

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Keep It Simple

One is happy as the result of one's own efforts.--- George Sand
Happiness is not an accident. It comes from following the spiritual voice found in each of us.
This isn't always easy. Sometimes, the voice tells us to do things we're afraid of. For Example, if we're lonely and the voice tells us to call someone on our phone list, we may make excuses to not do it. Again, the voice may say, "Just make the call. It will be okay." If we follow the
voice, we will find happiness. The spiritual voice inside us speaks of care and love. It will never tell us to hurt others or ourselves. It's our Higher Power's voice . It's what Step Eleven calls "conscious contact." If we follow this guiding voice, it will lead us to happiness.
Prayer for the Day: I pray that I'll come to know my Higher Power by listening to the spiritual voice in me.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll meditate and listen to my higher power gentle voice within.

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Each Day a New Beginning

Faith is like the air in a balloon. If you've got it you're filled. If you don't, you're empty. --Peggy Cahn
Being faith-filled takes effort, not unlike becoming a good writer, tennis player, or pianist. Faith grows within our hearts, but we must devote time to foster this growth. Daily discussions with God are required, frequent quiet times to hear God's messages to us--just as practice on the court, hitting balls or sitting for extended periods at the typewriter or a piano are necessary to attainment of these goals.
Life's difficulties are eased when we have faith. The most frightening situation, a job interview, an evaluation with our boss, a showdown with a friend, can be handled confidently when we let our faith work for us. But, we must first work for it, work to attain it and work to keep it. Like any skill, it gets rusty with lack of use.
I will make sure to add to my reserves today. We never know when we may need to let our faith direct our every action. I will make a friend of my higher power, and that partnership will carry me over any troubled time.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

If you and your husband find a solution for the pressing problem of drink you are, of course, going to very happy. But all problems will not be solved at once. Seed has started to sprout in a new soil, but growth has only begun. In spite of your new-found happiness, there will be ups and downs. Many of the old problems will still be with you. This is as it should be.

p. 117

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

The Twelve Steps worked like a crowbar, prying into my dishonesty and fear. I didn't like the things I learned about myself, but I didn't want to go back where I had come from. I found out that there was no substance on the planet that could help me get honest. I would do just about anything to avoid working on myself.

pp. 467-468

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."

A.A. experience has taught us we cannot live alone with our pressing problems and the character defects which cause or aggravate them. If we have swept the searchlight of Step Four back and forth over our careers, and it has revealed in stark relief those experiences we'd rather not remember, if we have come to know how wrong thinking and action
have hurt us and others, then the need to quit living by ourselves with those tormenting ghosts of yesterday gets more urgent than ever. We have to talk to somebody about them.

p. 55

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Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
--Mother Teresa

I let go of shame, as it will hold me prisoner to myself.
--Shelley

What you are is God's gift to you; what you make of yourself is your gift to God.
--unknown

God will not look you over for medals, degrees, or diplomas, but for scars.
--Elbert Hubbard

I work the steps and practice the principles because when I was out
there I drank away my principles and my values.
--unknown

Today I have choices. I can stay in a bad mood, I can stay in a bad
moment. Or, I can let them pass me by.
--unknown

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

TRUST

"Men become civilized, not in
proportion to their willingness
to believe, but in their readiness
to doubt."
-- H. L. Mencken

A civilized nation is essentially a spiritual nation. A civilized person is one who seeks
the truth and is willing to grow with change.

Sobriety is adventuresome because it is bigger than simply "not drinking"; it seeks
to address all areas of life and all situations. An example is trust. When I was
drinking, I trusted no one because I felt that everybody was like me out for
themselves! Today I know that the real enemy in my life is me; I am the one who
brings pain into my life. I am beginning to love myself by my decision not to drink. I
can trust today. I am beginning to trust myself and others.

O God, who trusted man with freedom, help me to freely trust.

************************************************** *********

Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me, for in you my soul takes refuge. I will
take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed.
Psalms 57:1

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be
compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with
blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For,
"Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips
from deceitful speech. He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it.
1 Peter 3:8-11

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Daily Inspiration

Praise others when they do right and speak positive things and you will find it hard not to relax and rejoice in a new found source of peace. Lord, may I care less what others think of me and more and more what You think.

Gossip betrays trust. The harm done is often irreparable. Lord, may I never be responsible for hurting anyone through my conversations.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Our Higher Power's Care

"We believe that our Higher Power will take care of us."
Basic Text pg. 55

Our program is based on the idea that the application of simple principles can produce profound effects in our lives. One such principle is that, if we ask, our Higher Power will care for us. Because this principle is so basic, we may tend to ignore it. Unless we learn to consciously apply this spiritual truth, we may miss out on something as essential to our recovery as breathing is to life itself.

What happens when we find ourselves stressed or panicked? If we have consistently sought to improve our relationship with our Higher Power, we'll have no problem. Rather than acting rashly, we will stop for a moment and briefly remind ourselves of particular instances in the past when our Higher Power has shown its care for us. This will assure us that our Higher Power is still in charge of our lives. Then, we will seek guidance and power for the situation at hand and proceed calmly, confident that our lives are in God's hands.

"Our program is a set of principles," our White Booklet tells us. The more consistently we seek to improve our conscious appreciation of these principles, the more readily we will be able to apply them.

Just for today: I will seek to improve my conscious contact with the Higher Power that cares for me. When the need arises, I know I will be able to trust in that care.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When written in Chinese, the word crisis is composed of two characters--one represents danger and the other represents opportunity. --John F. Kennedy
Family crises are unavoidable. At times, things are going to break down. This is no reason to give up and abandon ship. These breakdowns are the things, which will strengthen our lives together if we do not lose faith. The Einstein family had a crisis of sorts when their little boy, Albert, did not talk until he was four years old. But what looked like a problem at first did not end up that way in the long run.
We can expect downhill slides once in a while, and we may even start to feel full of self-pity. With faith that these setbacks are meant to help us grow stronger, we won't waste them and end up having to face them again and again until we do recognize their true purpose.
What setback can I use to grow stronger today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
As with expeditions into the wilds when we have endured storms and rapids, cold and sleet, and sometimes lack of food, it is ultimately the good things we remember, not the bad. --Sigurd F. Olson
In our daily lives we often take a very short perspective. We see what is worrisome today, what is pressing hardest, or what is most frightening or confusing. Eventually, we may look back and have a totally different idea about what was truly important on this day.
Let us take a moment now to remember what does endure, what we value most, what counts in the long run. For a brief quiet time we can let go of all the anxieties of this moment. During these few quiet moments, we will identify our tensions and then place them totally into the hands of our Higher Power. This is our time to let go of our worries and be refreshed. It will provide a background of serenity for our day.
Today, help me remember this corner of serenity as I meet the tasks and activities on my path.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Faith is like the air in a balloon. If you've got it you're filled. If you don't, you're empty. --Peggy Cahn
Being faith-filled takes effort, not unlike becoming a good writer, tennis player, or pianist. Faith grows within our hearts, but we must devote time to foster this growth. Daily discussions with God are required, frequent quiet times to hear God's messages to us--just as practice on the court, hitting balls or sitting for extended periods at the typewriter or a piano are necessary to attainment of these goals.
Life's difficulties are eased when we have faith. The most frightening situation, a job interview, an evaluation with our boss, a showdown with a friend, can be handled confidently when we let our faith work for us. But, we must first work for it, work to attain it and work to keep it. Like any skill, it gets rusty with lack of use.
I will make sure to add to my reserves today. We never know when we may need to let our faith direct our every action. I will make a friend of my higher power, and that partnership will carry me over any troubled time.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Step Twelve
The Twelfth Step says that having had a spiritual awakening, we try to carry this message to others. Our message is one of hope, love, comfort, health - a better way of life, one that works.
How do we carry it? Not by rescuing. Not by controlling. Not by obsessing. Not by becoming evangelists for the recovery cause.
We carry the message in many small, subtle, but powerful ways. We do our own recovery work and become a living demonstration of hope, self-love, comfort, and health. These quiet behaviors can be a powerful message.
Inviting (not ordering or demanding) someone to go to a meeting is a powerful way to carry the message.
Going to our meetings and sharing how recovery works for us is a powerful way to carry the message.
Being who we are and allowing our Higher Power to guide our actions are powerful ways to carry the message. Often, we find ourselves carrying the message more effectively than we do when we set out to reform, convince, or coerce someone into recovery.
Caretaking and controlling are not ways to carry the message. All those behaviors carry is codependency.
Still, the most powerful form of helping others comes down to helping ourselves. When we do our own work and are honest and open about it, we impact others more than by our most well intentioned "helping" gesture. We cannot change others, but when we change ourselves, we may end up changing the world.
Today, I will strive to carry the message in ways that work. I will let go of my need to "help" people. Instead, I will concentrate on helping and changing myself. If an opportunity comes up to share my recovery with someone, I will do so quietly. God, help me show others comfort, empowerment, and hope. I can be a channel to help others when I am ready. I do not have to force this; it will happen naturally.


I am very grateful for the gift of this day. It is mine to do exactly what I choose and I choose to use it for good and love. --Ruth Fishel

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Journey to the Heart

Let Your Heart Open Gently

Let your heart open– gently, safely, surely, and certainly.

Do not let others decide when or even if you will open your heart, when or if you will embrace love. Those choices are too big, too important to let others make for you. Only you can decide when and how.

There was a time when it wasn’t safe to open your heart. Pain was all around you. You were not equipped to be that open. That time is passed. You have learned. You have grown. You have learned that you are a loving being. You know now that your love comes from within you. It is safe to open your heart.

The universe awaits, ready, willing, delighted to be able to help you open, the same way it aids the opening of a flower with the sun, the rain, the earth. To deny your power and ability to love is to deny joy. To deny your loving essence is to deny yourself, your God, and the Divine in you.

Look around. It’s not your location that makes you safe. It’s where you are in your soul, your mind, and your heart. That place is good. That place is safe. Open your heart. Embrace life. Go joyfully on your way.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

There’s magic for you, too

I was looking at a photo of my friend Chip. In it, he’s sitting beside his battered, old volkswagon looking nearly as tired and battered as the car. But he’s smiling.

He was smiling the first time I met him,too. He told me the story of this photo prominently displayed on his desk.

“That picture was taken at the trailhead to White Mountain. Elevation twelve thousand feet. The last sixteen miles of the road are two dirt-tire tracks, but I really wanted to go on that hike. You should have seen the expressions on the faces of the research group in their four-wheel drive vans when I pulled up in Carmen.[That's his name for his car.] It was so high that the carburetor could hardly breathe. I don’t think I got over ten miles an hour for the last sixteen miles. When I got there, the car was on empty, and it was forty-seven miles to the closest gas station.

“After my hike, I put her in neutral and coasted all the way down the mountain. It was insane, my brakes were shot by the time I made it down, and I rolled into the gas station just as the engine died. What a trip!”

You can do things if you think that you can. You can put a backpack into your old car and take that trip with just a few dollars. You can see new things, visit new places, and amaze others and yourself. You can get the career you want, have the relationship you want, reach the dreams in your heart. You can get wherever you want to go from where you are now.

All it takes is faith, desire, and a little belief in the magic of the universe.

“Oh, but that magic only works for other people, not me,” I’ve heard others protest in disbelief.

One of the things I like about Chip is something he always says and means, whether he has $5 in his pocket or $3,000 in the bank. He says this in both the good times and the times most of us would label as bad.

“I can’t believe what a lucky individual I am. I can’t believe how amazing the world is. And I can’t believe and don’t understand why I’ve been this blessed.”

The magic of the universe is there waiting for each of us.

Look around. See how lucky and blessed you are. Then take another look at the limitations in your life and start letting go of those limitations, one by one. Find your dirt track with the great experience at the end. Find and follow your path with heart.

Oh, but do check the gas tank first.

God, once again, teach me the magic of I can.

*************************************

Living for Ourselves
Trying to Please Others

We don't need to live seeking approval from our parents or others; this can be overcome no matter what your age.

Most of us come to a point in our lives when we question why we are doing what we are doing, and many of us come to realize that we may be living our lives in an effort to make our parents happy. This realization can dawn when we are in our 20s, our 40s, or even later, depending upon how tight a hold our family of origin has on our psyche. We may feel shocked or depressed by this information, but we can trust that it is coming to us at this time because we are ready to find out what it would mean to live our lives for ourselves, following the call of our own soul, and refusing any longer to be beholden to someone else’s expectations.

One of the most common reasons we are so tied into making our parents, or others, happy, is that we were not properly mirrored when we were children. We were not honored as individuals in our own right, with a will and purpose of our own, to be determined by our own unfolding. As a result, we learned to look outside of ourselves for approval, support, and direction rather than look within. The good news is that the part of us that was not adequately nurtured is still there, inside us, like a seed that has not yet received the sunlight and moisture it needs to open and to allow its inner contents to unfurl. It is never too late to provide ourselves with what we need to awaken this inner being.

There are many ways to create a safe container for ourselves so that we can turn within and shine the light of awareness there. We may join a support group, go to therapy, or start a practice of journaling every day for half an hour. This experience of becoming is well worth the difficult work that may be required of us to get there. In whatever process we choose, we may feel worse before we feel better, but we will ultimately find out how to live our lives for ourselves and how to make ourselves happy. Published with permission from Daily OM

*************************************

A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

Contrary to what some people think, our slogan Let Go and Let God isn’t an expression of apathy, an attitude of defeatism, or an unwillingness to accept responsibility. Those who turn their backs on their problems are not “letting go and letting God,” but not, instead, are abandoning heir commitment to act on God’s inspiration and guidance. They neither ask for it all. In seeking God’s guidance, do I realize their the ultimate responsibility is mine?

Today I Pray

May I not allow myself to be lazy just because I think God is going to do everything anyway. (Such apathy reminds me of my old powerless self, the one that moaned that the world was going up in smoke, civilization was going down the drain and there wasn’t a thing I could do about it.) Neither may I use “letting God” do it as an excuse for shrugging off my problems without even trying. May God be my inspiration; may I be an instrument of God.

Today I Will Remember

God guides those who help themselves.

*************************************

One More Day

You should not hold back from making a start because of fears about th future.
–Lewis F. Presnall

Too often we fold up our dreams and set them aside because we can’t envision success. The dream of a new business or of a new home or even of a self-improvement plan is easily discarded if we allow ourselves to think only of reasons why it won’t work. Not enough money, we decided. Or, Id don’t have enough experience. Or — worse yet — I won’t succeed because I never have before.

We can become free to pursue our own dreams when we realize that the future is not an enemy waiting to thwart our efforts. What our tomorrows hold quite often depends on the decisions and moves we make today. right now, we can make a start. We can set aside — not our dreams — but our fears of an unfriendly future.

The choices I make today will affect the quality of my future.

************************************

Food For Thought

Flexibility

If we examine our behavior patterns when we were eating compulsively, we usually find that they were quite rigid. Our mental obsession and physical addiction kept us bound in repetitious behavior, which permitted very little spontaneity. With so much time and energy tied up in eating, we had very little flexibility. Most of our free time was used to support our addiction in one way or another.

As we recover, we may find ourselves threatened by unstructured time or by impromptu changes in schedule. An unexpected holiday can bring on feelings of emptiness or boredom. Changed plans can leave us feeling confused and unsettled. Without a firm routine, we may become uneasy.

Remembering that abstinence is the most important thing in our life without exception can provide an anchor when we are required to be flexible. As long as we remain abstinent, we are free to alter schedules and plans according to preference and convenience. Flexibility and spontaneity are possible when abstinence is firm.

Show me how to be flexible.

*****************************************

One Day At A Time

To Thine Own Self Be True
“Hide not your talents, they for use were made.
What’s a sun-dial in the shade?”
Benjamin Franklin

In the cups of my illness I was a chameleon and people-pleaser. I was afraid to stand on my own opinions and be myself. My fear of rejection kept me always looking for ways to fit in. I was running from life because I was afraid that I would be found to be a fraud and a compulsive eater. I played dumb in school and with my friends. I was afraid to be smart. I was afraid to have differing opinions. Shame kept me hiding inside of myself and inside of my suit of fat. I was afraid to be me.

Since coming to the program I am learning more each day that it is okay for me to be me. It is more than okay; it is essential. I can spread my wings and let myself out of my self-imposed cage ~ and I can go for a flight gliding on the breeze with ease. My first steps were wobbly, but this program promises me that the sunlight is there and it is okay to come out of the shade and be whom I really am. I have something to offer the world. We all do. It is up to us to find it in our deepest heart’s desire.

One day at a time...
I can take one small step to match my insides to my outsides.
~ Lanaya

*****************************************

AA 'Big Book' - Quote

All these and many others , have one symptom in common: they cannot start drinking without developing the phenomenon of craving. This phenomenon, as we have suggested, may be the manifestation of an allergy which differentiates these people, and sets them apart as a distinct entity. It has never been, by any treatment with which we are familiar, permanently eradicated. The only relief we have to suggest is entire abstinence. - Pg. xxx - 4th. Edition - The Doctor's Opinion

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

Nothing comes easy for us right now. A lot of energy goes into just staying put and accepting this new way of life. We say that when the going gets tough, we hang tough! We know that it will pass, we make that promise to you. But it will be in God's time, not yours.

Let me believe in myself, in this program, and in You, my Spiritual Source.

Inner Hearing, Inner Sight

Today, I will trust my own heart. The clear message that whispers within me has more to tell me than a thousand voices. I have a guide within me who knows what is best for me. There is a part of me that sees the whole picture and knows how it all fits together. My inner voice may come in the form of a strong sense, a pull from within, a gut feeling or a quiet knowing. However my inner voice comes to me, I will learn to pay attention. In my heart I know what is going on. Though I am conditioned by the world to look constantly outside myself for meaning, today I recognize that it is deeply important for me to hear what I am saying from within. I give myself the gift of listening.

I will trust my inner voice.

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

Sweat the small stuff. The big stuff we can handle, it's the day to day crap that gets us. How do we attend to the small stuff? Steps Ten and Eleven.

Today I treat myself to quiet time in order to review the small stuff.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Life happens; joy is optional.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

I am very grateful for the gift of this day. It is mine to do exactly what I choose and I choose to use it for good and love.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

Courage is fear that has said a prayer. - Anon.

[bluidkiti]

November 30

Daily Reflections

PROTECTION FOR ALL

At the personal level, anonymity provides protection for
all members from identification as alcoholics, a safeguard
often of special importance to newcomers. At the level of
press, radio, TV, and films, anonymity stresses the
equality in the Fellowship of all members by putting the
brake on those who might otherwise exploit their A.A.
affiliation to achieve recognition, power, or personal
gain.
"UNDERSTANDING ANONYMITY," p. 5

Attraction is the main force in the Fellowship of A.A. The
miracle of continuous sobriety of alcoholics within A.A.
confirms this fact every day. It would be harmful if the
Fellowship promoted itself by publicizing, through the
media of radio and TV, the sobriety of well-known public
personalities who became members of A.A. If these
personalities happened to have slips, outsiders would think
our movement is not strong and they might question the
veracity of the miracle of the century. Alcoholics Anonymous
is not anonymous, but its members should be.

************************************************** *********

Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

We have slips in A.A. It has been said these are not slips
but premeditated drunks, because we have to think about
taking a drink before we actually take one. The thought always
comes before the act. It has been suggested that people
should always get in touch with an A.A. before taking that
first drink. The failure to do so makes it probable that
they decided to take the drink anyway. And yet the thoughts
that come before taking a drink are often largely
subconscious. People usually don't know consciously what
made them do it. Therefore, the common practice is to call
these things slips. Am I on guard against wrong thinking?

Meditation For The Day

"The eternal God is thy refuge." He is a sanctuary, a refuge
from the cares of life. You can get away from the
misunderstanding of others by retiring into your own place of
meditation. But from yourself, from your sense of failure,
your weakness, your shortcomings, whither can you flee? Only
to the eternal God, your refuge, until the immensity of His
spirit envelopes your spirit and it loses its smallness and
weakness and comes into harmony again with His.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may lose my limitations in the immensity of
God's love. I pray that my spirit may be in harmony with
His spirit.

************************************************** *********

As Bill Sees It

I Am Responsible . . ., p. 332

When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there.
And for that: I am responsible.
--Declaration of 30th Anniversary International Convention, 1965

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Walk In Dry Places

Spiritual pride
Seeking humility
Those of us who have found a Higher Power in our lives can feel truly blessed. We know we're on the right path by witnessing the wonderful changes that continue to come into our lives.
One pitfall in this, however, is the risk of becoming "spiritually proud." We sometimes feel that our beliefs are so superior that others should accept them as well. We even become critical of the beliefs of others.
If this happens, we actually will be severing our own conscious contact with our higher power. False pride is a new form will be back in charge. Others will sense this too, and may withdraw from us.
Our best safeguard against this trap of spiritual pride is a reminder that we don't have all the answers. We can share our understanding with others, but we should never imply that we know what's best for them. Spiritual growth should being humility, not more of the pride that was destroying us.
I can leave all outcomes in God's hands today, knowing that everything is being controlled in a spiritual way.

************************************************** *********

Keep It Simple

The purpose of freedom is to create it for others.---Bernard Malamud
Sobriety is freedom. With this freedom, we have a responsibility to help other addicts who still suffer. The program tells us this in Step Twelve. We do this by telling our stories and offering hope.
We must be ready to care, to give ourselves. This is what spirituality is about. When we help others, we prepare the road for those who enter the program after us.
Tradition Five of the Twelve Traditions says, “Each group has but one primary purpose---to carry its message to the alcoholic who still suffers.” It means we get better by helping others.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me create more freedom. Bring me to where I’m needed. Help me carry the message well.
Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think of ways I can help the addict who still suffers. Then I’ll chose one way I can be of help. I’ll talk with my sponsor about it, and I’ll follow through with my plan.

************************************************** *********

Each Day a New Beginning

Doubt indulged soon becomes doubt realized. --Frances Ridley Havergal
We are powerless over our addictions, whether liquor, pills, people, food. We are powerless over the outcome of all events involving us. And we are powerless over the lives of our friends and family members. We are not powerless, however, over our own attitudes, our own behavior, our own self-image, our own determination, our own commitment to life and this simple program.
Power aplenty we have, but we must exercise it in order to understand its breadth. We'll find all the day's activities, interactions, plans decidedly more exciting when we exercise control over our responses. We don't have to feel or respond except in the way that pleases us. We have total control and we'll find this realization exhilarating.
Our recovery is strengthened each time we determine the proper behavior, choose an action that feels right, take responsibility where it is clearly ours to take. The benefits will startle us and bring us joy.
I will take charge of my life today.

************************************************** *********

Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

Chapter 8 - TO WIVES

The faith and sincerity of both you and your husband will be put to the test. These work-outs should be regarded as part of your education, for thus you will be learning to live. You will make mistakes, but if you are in earnest they will not drag you down. Instead, you will capitalize them. A better way of life will emerge when they are overcome.

p. 117

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories

LISTENING TO THE WIND - It took an "angel" to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

The thing that kept me sober until I got a grip on honesty was the love in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. I made some friends for the first time in my life. Real friends that cared, even when I was broke and feeling desperate. At twenty-two months of sobriety, I was finally able to complete an honest inventory. The Fifth Step enabled me to see my part in my resentments and fears. In the chapter "How It Works," in the Big Book, I was sown some questions. The answers to these questions provided me with knowledge about my reactions to the conditions in my life. Every response to every resentment, real or imagine, had been sick and self-destructive. I was allowing others to control my sense of well-being and behavior. I came to understand that the behavior, opinions, and thoughts of others were none of my business. The only business I was to be concerned with was my own! I asked my Higher Power to remove from me everything that stood in the way of my usefulness to Him and others, and to help me build a new life.

p. 468

************************************************** *********

Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Step Five - "Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs."

So intense, though, is our fear and reluctance to do this, that many A.A.'s at first try to bypass Step Five. We search for an easier way--which usually consists of the general and fairly painless admission that when drinking we were sometimes bad actors. Then, for good measure, we add dramatic descriptions of that part of our drinking behavior which our friends probably know about anyhow.

p. 55

************************************************** *********

A loving heart is the truest wisdom.
--Charles Dickens

"Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all
yourself."
--unknown

He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has.
--Henry Ward Beecher

All I have seen teaches me to trust the Creator for all I have not seen.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"To love another person is to see the face of God."
--Victor Hugo

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

FATE

"I am the master of my fate; I
am the captain of my soul."
-- William E. Henley

Things do not just happen, we make them happen. For years I thought that my getting
well was dependent upon my family getting well. I rooted my recovery in the recovery
of others. I was the typical co-dependent.

Then somebody said, "Why don't you start taking responsibility for your own life?" I
thought about that remark for weeks. I spent nights dwelling on the implications of
those words. I am sure that I had heard similar sentiments a hundred times but that
night, that special night, I was ready to hear them. A spiritual moment.

Today I believe that such spiritual moments produce a spiritual process that I must
keep alive. I am the deciding factor in what happens to me and what I can achieve.
God has created me to be involved in my recovery.

May I always steer my life in the direction of truth and love.

************************************************** *********

"Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the
body is weak."
Matthew 26:41

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.
Galatians 5:22-23

************************************************** *********

Daily Inspiration

You cannot really listen to someone and do something else at the same time. Lord, teach me to truly pay attention when someone speaks to me because it is in listening that I will gain wisdom.

God doesn't always end the storm, but He will calm your spirit and give you the courage you need. Lord, I have come to know and believe in the love You have for me.

************************************************** *********

NA Just For Today

Sharing The Real Me

"Sharing with others keeps us from feeling isolated and alone."
Basic Text pg. 81

Intimacy is the sharing of our innermost thoughts and feelings with another human being. Many of us long for the warmth and companionship intimacy brings, but those things don't come without effort. In our addiction, we learned to guard ourselves from others lest they threaten our using. In recovery, we learn how to trust others. Intimacy requires us to lower our defenses. To feel the closeness intimacy brings, we must allow others to get close to us - the real us.

If we are to share our innermost selves with others, we must first have an idea of what those innermost selves are truly like. We regularly examine our lives to find out who we really are, what we really want, and how we really feel. Then, based on our regular inventories of ourselves, we must be as completely and consistently honest with our friends as we can be.

Intimacy is a part of life, and therefore a part of living clean - and intimacy, like everything in recovery, has its price. The painstaking self-scrutiny intimacy calls for can be hard work. And the total honesty of intimacy often brings its own complications. But the freedom from isolation and loneliness that intimacy brings is well worth the effort.

Just for today: I seek the freedom from isolation and loneliness that intimacy brings. Today, I will get to know "the real me" by taking a personal inventory, and I will practice being completely honest with another person.

************************************************** *********

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
I've never sung anything that I wasn't ready to sing. --Claudia Schmidt
Most of us are curious about the "olden days" before we were born. We ask our parents what life was like when they were kids, what they did, what they looked like, and what they thought about. But most of us, even those who are parents ourselves, have probably never asked our parents, "Were you ready to go to school, to grow up, to get married, to get a job, to have me?"
So often we are afraid to take even a small new step, afraid of change. We feel so alone in our uncertainty. From our point of view, if often looks as though everybody's ready except us.
Perhaps another way to look at it is that, for most of our lives, readiness really isn't much of an issue. Were we ready to be born? Were we ready to walk, to read, to sing? Maybe we were; maybe not. What's important is what we did, not what we were ready to do. For life is mostly a matter of jumping in feet first shouting, "Here I come, ready or not!"
What am I going to do today, ready or not?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval. --Mark Twain
It is hard for many of us to learn to admit the wrongs we do. We have followed lifestyles that led us away from recognizing our true feelings. Remnants of this blindness continue into our recovery. In this quiet time we can deepen and nourish a relationship with ourselves. Facing our disapproval and admitting it lead us to comfort and self-respect. Right now we can ask ourselves, "What messages do 1 receive from myself? What is my Higher Power telling me? Do I sense some gut feeling? Am I true to my relationships with loved ones? Have I been open to the feelings of my spouse. Of my friends? Of my boss? Do I owe anyone an apology which I can promptly make?"
Some of us indulge in worry, fear, and anger beyond a useful or meaningful point. What can we do about these excesses of feeling? First, we admit them to ourselves and to others. Then, we trust our Higher Power for the outcome, and they will fall away.
Today, I will nourish a relationship with myself by facing my own disapproval and growing toward greater comfort.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
Doubt indulged soon becomes doubt realized. --Frances Ridley Havergal
We are powerless over our addictions, whether liquor, pills, people, food. We are powerless over the outcome of all events involving us. And we are powerless over the lives of our friends and family members. We are not powerless, however, over our own attitudes, our own behavior, our own self-image, our own determination, our own commitment to life and this simple program.
Power aplenty we have, but we must exercise it in order to understand its breadth. We'll find all the day's activities, interactions, plans decidedly more exciting when we exercise control over our responses. We don't have to feel or respond except in the way that pleases us. We have total control and we'll find this realization exhilarating.
Our recovery is strengthened each time we determine the proper behavior, choose an action that feels right, take responsibility where it is clearly ours to take. The benefits will startle us and bring us joy.
I will take charge of my life today.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Detachment
One day, my son brought a gerbil home to live with us. We put it in a cage. Some time later, the gerbil escaped. For the next six months, the animal ran frightened and wild through the house. So did we - chasing it.
"There it is. Get it!" we'd scream, each time someone spotted the gerbil. I, or my son, would throw down whatever we were working on, race across the house, and lunge at the animal hoping to catch it.
I worried about it, even when we didn't see it. "This isn't right," I'd think. "I can't have a gerbil running loose in the house. We've got to catch it. We've got to do something."
A small animal, the size of a mouse had the entire household in a tizzy.
One day, while sitting in the living room, I watched the animal scurry across the hallway. In frenzy, I started to lunge at it, as I usually did, then I stopped myself.
No, I said, I'm all done. If that animal wants to live in the nooks and crannies of this house, I'm going to let it. I'm done worrying about it. I'm done chasing it. It's an irregular circumstance, but that's just the way it's going to have to be.
I let the gerbil run past without reacting. I felt slightly uncomfortable with my new reaction - not reacting - but I stuck to it anyway.
I got more comfortable with my new reaction - not reacting. Before long, I became downright peaceful with the situation. I had stopped fighting the gerbil. One afternoon, only weeks after I started practicing my new attitude, the gerbil ran by me, as it had so many times, and I barely glanced at it. The animal stopped in its tracks, turned around, and looked at me. I started to lunge at it. It started to run away. I relaxed.
"Fine," I said. "Do what you want." And I meant it.
One hour later, the gerbil came and stood by me, and waited. I gently picked it up and placed it in its cage, where it has lived happily ever since. The moral of the story? Don't lunge at the gerbil. He's already frightened, and chasing him just scares him more and makes us crazy.
Detachment works.
Today, I will be comfortable with my new reaction - not reacting. I will feel at peace.


Today I know my journey to peace and serenity begins with me. Today I have the faith and trust to seek my answers from within. --Ruth Fishel

*************************************

Journey to the Heart

Trust Each Moment

Trust. Trust. Trust. Again and again, that’s the issue. See how much of your pain, your anguish, your tension arises simply from not trusting the absolute perfection of the present moment. I’ve lost my way. I’m off track. I’m somehow wrong– in the wrong place at the wrong time, doing the wrong thing. Where I’m going is a dead end. Oh, dear…

You are not off track. You haven’t lost your way. You’re going somewhere worth going. Somewhere magnificent beyond the ability of your mind to comprehend. By trusting the perfection of each moment, you give yourself a gift: permission to enjoy the journey.

Don’t just take the trip. Let yourself enjoy the ride.

*************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

Believe in the magic of life

Listen to the Never haves
Then listen close to me–
Anything can happen, child,
Anything can be.
–Shel Silverstein

All around us every day are those who would have us believe we can’t. They haven’t grown in their lives, so they tell us we can’t grow and change in ours. Belief systems are strong, but ideas are stronger. In 1899, the then chief of the U.S. patent office proposed closing it down. He said, “Everything that can be invented already has been.”

We look back on a statement like that today and laugh, but how often do we believe it in our own lives? I can’t go back to school because I’m nearly fifty. I shouldn’t change careers now; I’ll lose my retirement. Sure, a boat like that is nice, but I’ll never have one; I’m just not rich enough. Maybe he can stay sober, but I can’t change my life.

As children we’re filled with wonder at the world around us. Anything is possible, anything at all. But all too soon the weight of the shouldn’t's, impossible’s, and won’t's comes sneaking in around our shoulders tying us down to lowered expectations and limited beliefs.

The world is flat. If you sail to the edge, you will fall off. Everything that can be invented already has been. Man will never walk on the moon.

Believe in yourself. Believe in a wonderful God. Believe in the programs and support structures that help you every day. Say what it is you want, the lessons you want to learn, the goals you want to achieve, the relationships that you want to have, and then go out and allow the universe to manifest them in your life.

The never have’s sit on the sidelines and tell you about all that can’t be. Will you join them or will you quietly go about doing the impossible on your own?

Believe in the magic of I can. Tell the naysayers and never have’s I can, too. And so can you.

Today, why not go to a park, sit on a bench, and think back to when you were a child. What were your dreams, your hopes? Are they really that far out of reach? Remember, anything can happen and quite often, it does.

Thank you, God, for the glory of my journey so far. Be with me as I learn more about what I can accomplish through you.

*************************************

Gladdening Nourishment
Silliness by Madisyn Taylor

Giving yourself permission to be silly will nourish your creativity and is a good exercise in letting go.

Children appreciate all that is silly as a matter of course. Their grasp of humor is instinctual, and even the smallest absurdities provoke joyous gales of earnest laughter. As we age, this innate ability to see the value of silliness can diminish. Work takes precedence over play, and we have less incentive to exercise our imaginative minds by focusing on what is humorous. When we remember childhood, we may recall the pleasures of donning funny costumes, reciting nonsense poems, making up strange games, or playing pretend. This unabashed silliness nourished our vitality and creativity. We can take in this nourishment once again by giving ourselves permission to lighten up and be silly.

Too often we reject the wonderful silliness that is an inherent, inborn aspect of the self because we believe that it serves no purpose or is at odds with the grown-up culture of maturity. We play yet we do not lose ourselves in play, and our imaginations are never truly given free reign because we regard the products of irrational creativity as being valueless. Yet silliness itself does indeed constitute a vital part of human existence on a myriad of levels. Our first taste of ethereal bliss is often a consequence of our willingness to dabble in what we deem outrageous, nonsensical, or absurd. We delight in ridiculousness not only because laughter is intrinsically pleasurable, but also because it serves as a reminder that existence itself is fun. Skipping, doodling, and singing funny songs are no less entertaining than they were when we were children. We need not lose all interest in these cheerful and amusing activities, but to make them a part of our lives we must be read! y to sacrifice a little dignity and a lot of fear.

It is precisely because so much of life is inescapably serious that silliness should be regarded as a priority. Through the magic of imagination, you can be or become anything—a photographer, a professional athlete, a dancer, a pilot. Whether you take hundreds of silly pictures, revel in the adulation of your fans as you make the winning catch, boogie down rock-star style in front of your bedroom mirror, or turn your desk into a cockpit, the ensuing hilarity will help you see that lighthearted fun and adulthood are not at all incompatible. Published with permission from Daily OM

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A Day At A Time

Reflection For The Day

If you’re a negative thinker and are not yet ready to do an about-face, here are some guidelines that can keep you miserable for just as long as you wish to remain so. First, don’t go to meetings of The Program, especially discussion groups. If you somehow find yourself at a meeting, keep your mouth shut, your hands in your pockets, and your mind closed. Don’t try to solve an of your problems, never laugh at yourself, and don’t trust the other people in The Program. Above all, under no conditions should you try to live in the Now. Am I aware that negative thinking means taking myself deadly serious at all times, leaving no time for laughter — and for living.

Today I Pray

If I am feeling negative, may I check myself in the mirror that is the group for my symptoms of a closed mind; tight lips, forced smile, set law, straight-ahead glance — and not a glimmer of humor. God, grant me the ability to laugh at myself — often — for I need that laughter to cope with the everyday commotion of living.

Today I Will Remember

To laugh at myself.

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One More Day

It is in vain to say human beings outright to be satisfied with tranquility: they must have action; and they will make it if they cannot find it.
–Charolotte Bronte

Tranquil: free from agitation; calm, peaceful. This we understand; this we desire. We surely want to have tranquil lives. Before chronic illness, we may have taken peace and tranquility for granted, for we were actively involved with the pursuit of life. Happiness and contentment came automatically along with the rest, with no conscious thought about it.

Before long we began to understand that if we wished to be tranquil, our minds and our bodies needed activity. Tranquility, that inner sense of calm, comes from contentment with how we are living our lives — and how actively we are living.

Tranquility will increase with my activity.

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Food For Thought

Survival

We will never make it if we feel we are responsible for solving everyone else's problems. It is tempting to our ego to feel that we can exercise control over the lives of those around us, but it is counter to reality. We cannot protect those we love from sadness, sickness, or pain. Making martyrs of ourselves only prepares the ground for future retaliation.

Our primary task is to remember our dependence on our Higher Power and by His grace to maintain our abstinence. The problems, which we face, are best deal with if our spiritual condition is strong. Without abstinence from compulsive overeating, we are not much help to anyone, least of all ourselves.

There are times when all we can manage is to hang on, to survive. We know in our heads that these times will eventually pass. Practicing Step Eleven convinces us in our hearts that God is in charge, no matter how far away He may seem to be.

By Your grace, may I survive the hard times.

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One Day At A Time

BOUNDARIES
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.
Joseph Fort Newton

When I was growing up I remember always being lonely and I never had many friends. In order to protect myself from the pain of rejection, or perhaps because I didn't have self-esteem or believe in myself, I gave the impression that I didn't need people. I was probably thought of as a snob. I thought that people didn't like me because I was shy and introverted, but I had built up around myself an impenetrable protective wall which didn't invite anyone in. It was small wonder that I spent many lonely nights buried in a book or food or any other solitary pursuit for that matter.

In my adult years I became a people-pleaser in the hopes that people would like me more. That even spilled over to include my children as well, which meant that I wasn't able to say no to them or anyone else unless they stopped loving me. I would say yes when I really meant no, and consequently I was always filled with resentment and felt even lonelier than ever. I didn't know how to set boundaries and was terrified that if I said no, people wouldn't love me anymore.

I now know that when I set boundaries, it is an affirmation of my worth, and in most cases I am respected and liked by those people who are really my true friends. My children, too, have benefitted from my having set boundaries with them, and they have more respect for me than before. I am beginning to realize that it is just fine to do what is right for me, and that it doesn't have to jeopardize any of my relationships.

One day at a time . . .
I am learning that it is right for me
to define my boundaries with those that I love,
knowing that I set these boundaries in love and friendship,
rather than hostility, and that I am still a lovable person.
Sharon S.

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AA 'Big Book' - Quote

The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death. - Pg. 30 - More About Alcoholism

Hour To Hour - Book - Quote

It is easy to 'beat ourselves up' when we are lonely, scared, and feeling rejected by those we love. But if we go to meetings every day, find a sponsor and use him/her, read our literature, and follow the suggestions being give to us now, we really don't have much time to dwell on 'lonely, scared, and rejected.'

Show me right now what I need to do to live this hour through, clean and sober.

The Treasures Within

Within me is the perfect life waiting to awaken. The gifts I seek are already within me. A deep pool of awareness and aliveness is present all of the time but I am too distracted to know it. I get so lost in the superficial details and tasks of my life that I forget to live it, to drop down and contact the spirit that God has planted within me. It is the best kept secret that spirit lives within me, that the way in which I come in touch with my inner light is through letting the constant preoccupations of my mind float by, not taking them so seriously, not trying to control them. Today I realize that the gold is not in my ability to control my mind, the gold is in what lies beneath. What emerges when my mind, for a precious moment, is stilled.

Spirit is with me always

- Tian Dayton PhD

Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote

How important are the slogans? Sometimes, these are the only things we can bring to mind when we stand at a turning point, the thresh-hold of a crisis.

The slogans work much better for me when I decorate my life with them rather than decorating the walls with them.

"Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book

Judge yourself by your insides not by someone else's outsides.

Time for Joy - Book - Quote

Today I know my journey to peace and serenity begins with me. Today I have the faith and trust to seek my answers from within.

Alkiespeak - Book - Quote

After a few drinks I was capable of doing anything. As a result of which I stand before you tonight with no fantasy unlived. I have done everything that it has ever occurred to me to do - I'm deeply grateful that there are some things I never thought of. - Sean A.