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Family and Friends of Alcoholics and Addicts This forum is for families and friends whose lives have been affected by someone else's drinking and/or drug abuse.

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Old 05-01-2014, 08:42 AM   #1
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Default Today's Gift for Families - May 2014

Quote:
Thursday, May 1, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die,
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly
—Langston Hughes

Watching birds spread their wings and soar can remind us of the best in ourselves. In joyful moments we all feel our own desire to fly, to reach toward what we dream of doing.

Our dreams give us a direction to fly. Birds fly toward the light for joy, toward green leaves for shelter, to water and berries for food. In the same way, our dreams direct us to the course of our own joy, shelter, and nourishment.

Sometimes as we fly, we bump into disappointments. They may temporarily stun us or slow us down. But just like birds that are occasionally wounded, we can heal ourselves and fly again. We can choose to not let the hardships of life break our spirited wings. Rather, we can keep spreading our wings, soaring in the spirit of joy.

Am I flying today, or must I heal a wound first?
We sometimes wonder why we can't get off the ground and we wonder why. Perhaps that broken wing needs healing, sometimes it is a rest and a time out to top ourselves up, and we forget that we have to have in order to give 'it' away, instead of using others to make ourselves feel good. I have to do my part.
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Old 05-02-2014, 09:37 AM   #2
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Friday, May 2, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

A bird came down the walk: He did not know I saw; He bit an angle-worm in halves And ate the fellow, raw.
—Emily Dickinson

We must look very different to the birds than we do to each other. Likewise, birds seem different to us than they do to each other. Neither the way we see birds or the way they see us is the "right" way. They are simply different ways of seeing.

If we could turn birds into people so they would see things the way we do, eat the way we do, and think the way we do, we would lose the idea of flying. The knowledge that flight is possible is a gift birds have given us.

We do well to remember this when we get upset at others for not doing things the way we would. Varieties of styles, appetites, and ideas are gifts that enrich the world and bring more possibilities into our lives.

When others disagree with me today, will I accept their gift?
That is a gift of recovery. I had to have a change in attitude in order to grow and recover.

Very seldom do the words come back to me in thought, "Flock you and the horse you rode in on." I don't want to be that kind of person in today.

Let it begin with me, it is about me and my attitude, not the "A" in my life. Many have shown me the way, many did my research for me, many showed me how to not work my program, and for that I am grateful.
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Old 05-03-2014, 05:03 AM   #3
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Saturday, May 3, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent.
—Erica Jong

How easy it is to look at others with envy, certain that everyone we know is better in every way: school, sports, games, and appearance. What we may not know is that each of us is exactly right the way we are. And what's more, no one of us is without talent. Perhaps we simply have not discovered it yet, or maybe we've been certain we knew what the talent should be, rather than letting the talent within us emerge.

It's reassuring to know that we are talented, that we are special just as we are, that no one else is able to bring to this life exactly the same ingredients that we're able to bring.

What special talent shall I exercise today?
Just trying to be the best me I can be in today. Don't try to be something I am not. Share what and who you are with others, pay it forward, it was freely given to you. Recognize your talent as a gift.
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Old 05-04-2014, 02:34 AM   #4
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Sunday, May 4, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

A person can grow only as much as his horizon allows.
—John Powell

Should you become a doctor or perhaps an astronaut? Maybe being a writer or an athlete appeals to you. Dreaming of what to be can be useful. It helps us set our goals and learn our values. Also, using our imagination lets us "try on" a future role. We learn about our life's direction through our dreams of where to go and what to do.

Not all dreams are helpful, however. Sometimes we daydream about other things when we really do need to listen. Learning how to use our imagination to guide our plans for growing up takes practice.

Imagining ourselves happy and brave will help us feel both. Imagining ourselves as failures can be just as powerful. Let's respect the power of the imagination and use it to form good images of our future.

How can I build goodness and success into my future today?
Open my mind and widen my vision, and look for my God's message in all areas of my life. Don't overlook or reject the messenger, know that God utilizes people, places, and things to show me a better way of living.
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Old 05-05-2014, 02:52 AM   #5
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Monday, May 5, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
—William Butler Yeats

When we hold a piece of crystal to the light, it paints rainbows on the wall. When we tap it lightly with a spoon, it sings like a bell. But when we drop it, it shatters in colorless, silent pieces on the floor.

Human beings, sometimes to our amazement, can be as fragile as glass. It's especially easy to forget what makes people we live with or have known for a long time shine or sing. We take for granted the very qualities that made us love them in the first place.

When we forget how to see and hear the people we love, how to appreciate them, we grow careless. Too often, from sheer neglect, the relationship between us grows dull and silent, then slips, falls, and shatters. Paying attention to other people's needs and feelings can prevent this.

Whose presence can I appreciate today?
The presence I need to feel and appreciate He is there, is my God.
I appreciate that I know is is there and I can go to Him and I don`t have to go searching for Him, He is there. All I have to do is surrender to the moment, accept, and ask for help and give thanks.
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Old 05-06-2014, 02:44 AM   #6
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Tuesday, May 6, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

"Take it away at once," stormed the Princess, stamping her tiny foot in its embroidered slipper. "I hate real flowers; their petals fall off and they die."
—Hans Christian Andersen

If love is reserved for things that never die, love is doomed to die. If flowers fade in a minute or two, will not stones wear to sand in time? Even this earth, this garden of life, one day will be like the dust of stars. We must walk gratefully, carefully on it now. Now is the lifetime that passes here, now is the best of all days; now is the flower's eternity in the sun, our chance of a lifetime.

This is all we have, this moment. Within it, anything can be done, any dream fulfilled, if we only use it well. Why hold back? There is nothing to stop us.

What can I do to use this moment well?
Enjoy it, accept it, be aware of it, and give thanks for it.
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Old 05-07-2014, 05:36 PM   #7
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Wednesday, May 7, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Our deeds will travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are.
—George Eliot

We grow within, the way a tree does. We've all seen the rings representing the years of a tree's life. We carry our histories with us, too. Our actions, our attitudes, our goals, and our dreams all gather together inside us to make us what we are today. We're probably ashamed of some of our past, but our behavior each day adds to our history, and we control it.

We can't escape our mistakes, but we don't have to repeat them; and every day that is lived well gives us a history to be proud of.

How can I add goodness to my past - and my future - by my actions today?
For me, it was about not bringing the past into today, unless it was to bring it out and allow it to heal. As they say, unless you acknowledge it and feel the feelings, you can't let it go.

It was important for me to recognize that the future doesn't have to include the past, if I take my God with me. I try not to live my day thinking that things will be the same in today as it was prior to recovery, if I am working a program and living the Steps.
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Old 05-08-2014, 08:05 PM   #8
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Thursday, May 8, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Talking little, and with the low, tender part of our voices, as in nodding to one who already knows what you mean.
—Tess Gallagher

Once there was a small child whose only word was no. When she wanted to indicate yes, she nodded her head emphatically. What she liked to do instead of talk was play. She liked to play outside in the meadow with the bugs and rocks and plants.

The mullein was her favorite plant. She rubbed the soft, furry leaves across her cheek. Her mother told her that in the old days, American Indians used these leaves as bandages. Several years later, Lucy picked a mullein leaf and took it in the house to her mother. "Look, Mama. Indian owee."

We, too, can remember some surprising things from the dim past, before we could talk or understand all that went on around us. Communication does not always depend on words alone but on the tenderness with which they are spoken. Walking through the world in a tender, loving way is a form of communication that goes beyond words to our deepest feelings.

What are some of the ways we show our love without words?
Pass on a smile. Our body language speaks volumes. Learn to listen, and listen to learn, acknowledge and affirm someone else. Did you ever think to see someone in passing and say, "I really like your suit," or "I really like your shoes, they really go with your outfit," or "Thank you for your smile, you cheered me up."
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Old 05-09-2014, 03:44 AM   #9
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Friday, May 9, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Planning is deciding what to change today so tomorrow will be different from yesterday.
—Ichak Adizes

A house is like a lump of clay that can be molded and changed. It can be fixed and shaped, torn down and added to, painted, papered, carpeted, and panelled. We can think about how to change it, find pictures in books, and order plans. We can stock up on supplies, take fix-it classes, and get advice from others. But the house will remain unchanged until we pick up a brush, grab a bucket of paint, and get to work. Only then will we see tomorrow the results of what we did today.

Our plans help us construct a vision of how we'd like the future to be, but only actions will bring these things about. With confidence in the rightness of our desires, we can be assured that God never gives us a dream we can't reach.

What action can I take today to make tomorrow's changes?
Apply the program to all areas of my disease. Food, rest, exercise, etc. for the body, mind, and spirit.

I was just talking to my sponsor about this tonight. Greater acceptance and lower expectations, living in today instead of comparing it to the past, especially as we age.
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Old 05-10-2014, 02:41 AM   #10
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Saturday, May 10, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

To apologize: to lay the foundation for a future offense.
—Ambrose Bierce

"I'm sorry," said the blind man as he whipped the mare. "I'm sorry," said the mare, as she kicked the blind man in return.

"We're sorry," they assured themselves, as they pushed each other around again and again. Often, we push our troubles with other people around, creeping along in the old rough way, refusing to change because we're too involved to see another choice.

There's little sorrow in being sorry all the time. A true apology doesn't try to explain. Sometimes a true apology just breaks down and cries. Then maybe we're ready to go on - take someone by the hand, tell the whole sad truth, and work to find a better way.

Are my apologies excuses, or requests to be forgiven?
A sorry isn't an amend. An apology doesn't cut it, unless you work to not doing the same thing again. We have lots of excuses, but once we come into recovery, we don't have a reason to continue living the way we were. We will know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will be given new tools to handle life on life's terms.
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Old 05-11-2014, 03:58 AM   #11
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Sunday, May 11, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I'm delighted that the future is unsure. That's the way it should be.
—William Sloane Coffin

Some of life's richest moments are the most unexpected: the old friend met by chance, or the new one discovered when neither of us were really looking; the toy at the bottom of the toy box, rediscovered and loved anew; the book, the flower, the shaft of light we were in the right place at the right time to notice and embrace.

It is important to dream and plan, to work toward goals, to mark the milestones we pass on life's journey. No less important, though, is to open ourselves to the unexpected joys awaiting us every day.

Am I ready, today, to expect the unexpected?
This reminds me of the many times I have asked myself, "Why me!" Why not me? What makes me different? Do we ask ourselves this when good things come? Why do we think we are the only one? Are we being judgmental and think we are exempt from life? Do we thing that because we are loved by God that we free from sad, sorrow, pain and hurt? He sees us through it, but life does happen. When we put expectations on the day, we make ourselves more vulnerable to pain. What I put out, I get back. So if I go around with negative thoughts, they will often come back in kind.
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Old 05-12-2014, 02:45 AM   #12
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Monday, May 12, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I would be honest, for there are those who trust me.
—Howard Arnold Walter

Some of those around us seem to see only the good in us. They trust and respect us, even when we ourselves may not feel we deserve it.

A young girl once talked about her grandfather. She said, "He was the only person in my life who saw the good in me." She mentioned that she sought to please her grandfather and not disappoint the trust, which he placed in her. He brought out the best in her because of the way that he looked at her. Each of us can be like this grandfather by focusing on the good in other people. We can use our spiritual eyes to see love, honesty, trustworthiness, and unselfishness in the heart of another. As we look for the good, we are doing our part to help create it.

Do I see the good in those around me right now?
Had to recognize that others had their dis-ease too, whether it was recognized or not. It wasn't my job to tell them and take their inventory. All I could do was pray for them.

As my son use to say, "Look at me your son, not my disease."
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Old 05-14-2014, 12:50 AM   #13
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Tuesday, May 13, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Talent--I don't know what that is. It's will. You dream a dream and then you build it.
—Philippe Petit

Even the most accomplished pianists begin at some point by playing simple scales and exercises. With daily practice, their hands learn to find the correct notes and become limber enough to play well. They learn each new piece of music very slowly at first, until, with study and practice, they can play almost without effort.

In the beginning, the pianist only dreams of being an accomplished musician. This dream helps the artist through many hours of practice and study.

Talent is really the combination of a dream and the time spent building it. We develop our ability by devoting time to the skills that interest us. Like the musician, we become talented through daily practice - the daily building of a dream. By developing our talents, we develop who we are.

Who am I becoming today?
The best me I can be in today!
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Old 05-14-2014, 11:18 AM   #14
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Wednesday, May 14, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith.
—Henry Ward Beecher

Once there was a boy who always looked on the bright side and always expected the best. He expected to like brussels sprouts before he had ever tasted them, for instance, and to like his teacher on the first day of school. Because he had such a sunny outlook on things, he was rarely disappointed.

But the boy's father thought he wasn't realistic, so one Christmas he decided to test him. On Christmas morning there were many presents, all but one small one were for the boy's brother. The brother opened his gifts with glee - a train set, a toy robot, a cowboy outfit, even his own TV.

Through all this, the boy smiled expectantly, confident the contents of his small box would equal the splendor of his brother's gifts. When it was his turn he ripped the box open to find only a pile of hay and some very smelly animal droppings.

To his father's astonishment, the boy clapped his hands with joy and ran immediately to the backyard. "Yippee!" he cried. "There must be a pony here somewhere!"

If I expect the best, just for today, what wondrous things might happen?
My day is as good as my attitude toward it. I try not to put high expectations on a day, just accept it as it comes and give thanks. That way I am not disappointed and hurt, but blessed and grateful.
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Old 05-15-2014, 06:08 AM   #15
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Thursday, May 15, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

What is moral is what you feel good after.
—Ernest Hemingway

Each of us has a little voice inside us that tells us what is good and what is bad. For instance, if our friends are making fun of someone who is different than we are, how do we feel if we join in the laughter? Do we feel more comfortable if we refuse to join in, or if we tell them their jokes are not funny?

As we grow, we learn more and more to trust the inner voice. Sometimes, in times of dark confusion, we have to listen very hard, but it is there to guide us. It is a beacon showing us the way out of the darkness of uncertainty. It is our guide to goodness.

Will I have the courage to listen to my inner voice today?
Had to distinguish if the inner voice was my Lower or Higher Power. Was it my God's Will or my own.

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