Today's Thought - December

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December 1

Carrying the Message

What we are always carries a stronger message than what we say. This is why we're sometimes turned off by people who seek to overwhelm us with charm. It's also why we can sometimes be drawn to people who are quiet and unassuming.

However it works, there is a powerful message in one's unspoken thoughts and feelings. We can usually sense, for example, the mood of people in a room, even when little is being said. If we spend any time with others, they will soon know much about us even if we say little.

This silent communication may be the great secret of AA's success in reaching those who still suffer. If we are living sober and want to help others, that's the message we give out. That's also a form of carrying the message.

I'll communicate today by maintaining a warm and friendly attitude toward every person I meet, knowing that thoughts and feelings speak louder than words.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

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December 2

He that knew all that learning ever writ
Knew only this - that he knew nothing yet.
--Aphra Behn

It's true that the more information we have about the world, the more clearly we see the shape of what we don't know. It's also true that we don't need to learn anything at all in order to deal fairly with others and to walk gently in the world.

The wisdom that we need is inside us. Before our schooling teaches us to forget it, we know instinctively how to treat others because we know how we wish others to treat us, and we know that all people are one.

This primitive knowledge mustn't be buried under the classifications and analyses we pick up along the way. We can, if we try, de-school ourselves to the point where we can listen to our spirits, trust our bodies, and revere the world for the seamless whole it is.

If I cherish my original wisdom, then learning can help me to be comfortable in my ignorance.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

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December 3

The Man, the Boy, and the Donkey

A man and his son headed to market with their donkey. A man on a horse passed them and asked, "Why aren't you riding your donkey?"

The man placed his son on the donkey, and they continued on their way. They passed by a family working in their fields. A young girl said. "Look at that lazy boy riding while his father is walking."

The man told his son to get off the donkey, and he climbed on. They passed a group of women and one said, "What a selfish man, making his son walk while he rides."

The man asked his son to climb up on the donkey with him. They passed a traveler on the road, who said, "That poor donkey is carrying too much weight."

Not knowing what to do, the man and his son began to carry the donkey. But the donkey kicked so violently they released their hold and the donkey ran away.

The Moral of the story: In striving to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one.

Striving to be a people-pleaser can make you feel as if what you are doing is never right, and you lose your ability to make your own decision.

I will choose to do what is right for me.

You are reading from the book:

Morning Light by Amy E. Dean

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December 4

Our silence can keep us isolated.

"Still waters run deep" may be true for lakes and rivers, but in intimate relationships it is not necessarily true. Our silence can keep us isolated from ourselves and from those we love. In order to grow together, we must let each other know how we think and feel. Sometimes just saying a thought or feeling helps us see beyond it.

If we keep our thoughts to ourselves, we may get so immersed in those still waters that we nearly drown in them. A problem kept to ourselves usually grows bigger and more consuming. When we talk about it, we can work through it and move on to something else.

Choose, one concern, small or large, and express it to your partner.

You are reading from the book:

The More We Find In Each Other by Merle Fossum and Mavis Fossum

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December 5

Recovery releases our creativity

Creativity implies something new - feeling, thinking, acting in a new way. When we step out of a familiar pattern, we often feel anxious. We wonder if the new way will work or if a new venture will succeed. We take a chance, a risk, and that requires courage.

If we refuse to tolerate a certain amount of anxiety, we will stay in our same old ruts. Safe? Perhaps, but stagnant. And maybe not so safe after all, since the opposite of growth is death.

You and I can live creatively if we are willing to have butterflies in our stomachs from time to time. Recovery releases us from old patterns so that we can try new ways of responding to the opportunities we are given each day. Believing we are supported by a Higher Power gives us the courage to take risks, especially when the outcome promises emotional and spiritual growth.

Today, I will dare to follow a creative inner prompting, even if I feel some anxiety.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

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December 6

Sometimes two minuses make a plus.
--Edith Shannon

What appears to be a problem sometimes turns out to be a most beneficial circumstance. We live only in the present, and it generally takes the perspective of hindsight to get the full meaning of an event. Over the years, we have learned that some of our best lessons actually caused us pain while we were in their clutches. What a relief to be able to see, now, that they had their silver lining. This principle still holds true.

We have had a lot of years to learn to take our experiences in stride, giving them no more weight than they deserve. But it's easy to forget that it's the accumulation of them all that defines who we are. The lost jobs, the friends who left, the hurdles in a marriage all played their part in the people we've become today. We are who we need to be right now.

I can't let a setback set me back today. I am evolving right on schedule.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

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December 7

Serenity

Your body is tense. Your face is somber and serious, ready to deliver the news. You may be slightly breathless. There's a crisis. It may be real. Or it may be self-created.

Like an audience in a sports arena, we watch the events of life or even The Weather Channel drumming up reactive responses. Fear. Sometimes panic. Oh my God, what if.

I called my daughter in this frame of mind one morning, ready to report on the latest current event in my life. I barely had three words out of my mouth when she interrupted me. "You're talking in your drama-addiction tone."

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." I've probably said this prayer out loud a thousand times, and silently twice that amount. It's called the Serenity Prayer, not the Courage Prayer, not the Wisdom Prayer. That is because, no matter what we're doing, before we receive courage or wisdom, serenity needs to come first.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

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December 8

Laughter, by definition, is healthy.
--Doris Lessing

A hearty laugh can warm a cold room and make our spirits soar. But many of us are afraid to laugh, especially when we make mistakes. We think we're supposed to be perfect, and we don't allow ourselves to make mistakes. However, we're not a mold punched out by a machine. We're human beings, with all our wonderful flaws. It is those flaws that make our lives interesting and surprising. Who knows when we might accidentally bump into a chair or catch our sweater on a doorknob? We needn't feel self-conscious, it happens to many of us.

The ability to laugh at ourselves is a gift from God. All we need to do is grab it and use it. Then we will see how healthy and powerful laughter can be.

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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December 9

It isn't for the moment you are struck that you need courage, but for the long uphill climb back to sanity and faith and security.
--Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Most of us are on a long uphill climb at this moment. It is a climb we are making together, and yet a climb we can't do for each other. I can reach out my hand to you, and you can grasp my hand in return. But my steps are my own, just as you, too, can only take one step at a time.

For brief periods we skip, even run, along the uphill path. The rocks and the occasional boulder momentarily trip us up. We need patience and trust that the summit is still achievable. We can help one another have patience. We can remind one another to trust.

We look back at the periods that devastated us so long ago. And now we are here. We have climbed this far. We are stronger, saner, and more secure. Each step makes easier the next step - each step puts us on more solid ground.

I may run into some rocks or even a boulder today. I have stepped around them in the past. I will do so again.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

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December 10

We are what we are.
--Motto of Lake Wobegon, Garrison Keillor

Sometimes we devote so much effort to being what we are not, that we lose the chance to be what we are. We have one identity for this person and another for that one. Our co-workers, neighbors, friends, and family all expect different things of us, leaving us wondering who we actually are. How can we be so many different things to so many people?

God wants us to be only who we are. We were created with unique characteristics for a purpose, even if that purpose isn't always clear to us. We need to be who we really are, and to be the best we can be, knowing that God approves because God created us as we are.

I will be the best me that I know how to be.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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December 11

Relax enough to face reality when life twists and turns.

Sometimes in life, no matter how deeply we intend to make the best decisions possible for ourselves, things happen. Marriages end, jobs turn sour, friends wane. For reasons outside our control or understanding, the situation twists and turns into something other than what we bargained for.

Have you been waiting for a situation to revert to what it originally was - or what you hoped it would be when you got in? Are you telling yourself that there's something wrong with you, when the reality is, the situation has changed into something other than what you thought it was? Things often don't go as smoothly as we planned. Sometimes, we need to endure and get through the rough spots. But I'm talking about those grindingly difficult moments when life suddenly twists on us.

These are the times we need to quit torturing ourselves. Let go of what you thought would happen. If life has twisted on you, don't turn on yourself. Don't try to make things be the way they were. Come up to speed. Return to now. Let yourself accept the new situation at hand.

The road isn't always a straight course. Sometimes, even a path with heart unexpectedly twists and turns.

God, help me relax and trust my self enough to deal with reality, not my fantasy of what I hoped it would be.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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December 12

When all else fails, read the instructions.
--Agnes Alien

The instructions for recovery are in our Twelve Step program. Yet, there are times when we feel our program isn't working. At these times, we need to read the instructions.

Have you followed the "instructions," the wise words found in The Big Book, The Twelve and Twelve, and other recovery literature? When we do, we recover.

It's hard at times and easy at others. Our problems go deeper than just staying sober. No matter what our problems, our program can help us start fixing them if we follow the instructions. Don't use alcohol or other drugs. Go to meetings. Talk often with sponsors and program friends. Work the Steps. Think. Easy Does It. First Things First. Listen. Let Go and Let God. One Day at a Time.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, tell me which instructions to read today. If I'm headed for trouble, help me out.

Today's Action

I'll read the instructions today.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

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December 13

Dare to be empty.
Dare to let go.
Dare to believe.
--Elisabeth L.

Not many of us have received a direct, visual experience of God. Most of us only sense a Presence, or perhaps see the evidence of God's help. It takes profound faith to live moment by moment in the knowledge that God is always here.

The founders of AA understood how difficult it is to believe. The tools of this program can help us with our struggle. In using them, we let God guide us, protect us, comfort us, and take charge of everyone else too. Asking sponsors for examples of how they have let go will help us see our opportunities more clearly. Coupling their suggestions and experiences with practice at using the Steps and slogans will strengthen our willingness to turn to God for everything.

I will be able to let God take charge if I rely on the example and experience of the friends I know I can trust. Today can be easy.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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December 14

So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
--Will Rogers

It is a challenge to live in the present, but Step Ten gives us a way to do just that. It is a maintenance step, a way to stay true to ourselves. As we continue to take inventory of our attitudes and behavior, we find ourselves growing in self-acceptance and self-love. In the past, the last thing we wanted to do was be honest. Now, possessing serenity and faith, we can see that our shortcomings are only that: shortcomings. They are part of who we are, and every part of ourselves is important.

Taking a personal inventory is not a way to sit in judgment of ourselves. Rather, it enables us to examine our behavior with honesty and gentleness. It is an affirmation that growth is a process; we do it throughout our lives. Taking time for a personal inventory is a way to say that our needs are important, our good points are important, and our character defects are important. We are whole people, lovable just as we are.

I will take time for an inventory today. I will admit my wrongs, give myself credit for my accomplishments, and give the day to God with gratitude.

You are reading from the book:

Answers in the Heart by Anonymous

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December 15

Being Before Doing

What we are comes before what we do. In order to produce good fruit, the tree has to be a good tree. If we are not whole, integrated, and in touch with ourselves and our Higher Power, the actions that we take will not be satisfying.

For us, being abstinent is more important than anything we do. When we are abstinent, all things are possible. We still have to make choices, deal with frustration and conflict, and accept some defeats, but we are coping with reality rather than escaping.

The best things that we do are those which our Higher Power does through us. Our role is to be ready and available, a sharpened tool which God may use. Often we do not see the ultimate results of our actions. We trust that what we do will be acceptable and according to God's will.

May I be what You intend.

You are reading from the book:

Food for Thought by Elisabeth L.