Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - November

[bluidkiti]

November 1

Step by Step

Today, remembering that I worked the steps as hard as I could when I surrendered in Step One, I know I will have to rework them again if I choose to slip or relapse. Some of the steps required to gain and maintain sobriety also require some of the most brute honesty possible, and seeing myself as I truly was is an experience I don’t want to repeat. Thus, the solution to avoid having to see myself again as I was is simple: don’t slip, don’t relapse. Sometimes easier said than done, but the 12 Steps give us the control not to bow to what we cannot control – alcohol. It is a fact that the sober alcoholic has another drunk inside but may not have another recovery. Even if I have another recovery, I don’t want to go through the grueling experience of seeing myself as I might again become during a slip or relapse. And my insurance against having to go through that is the program. Today, I’ll use it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

KEEP COMING BACK

Keep coming back; it works if you work it.

~ Anonymous ~

Our memories can be very short. Staying close to the Program and attending meetings is important in keeping our memories current. Addictions have a way of patiently waiting for us to stop working our Program. Addictions know that when we stop working, it is only a matter of time before they take over again.

There will never be a graduation from meetings, and we will never have more than this day to judge our progress. We succeed or fail one day at a time, one meeting at a time.

Many of us can say with some certainty that we do not have another recovery in us. If we relapse, we may never come back. There is no certainty in recovery; there is no perfection; there is only progress. We attend meetings to make that progress.

I have to keep coming back to stay in recovery. My recovery will keep working for me if I continue to work it.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

There’s a lot of credit that can be given to youth and enthusiasm, but with them comes foolishness. Age and craftsmanship is not to be played down. I have got more tricks up my sleeves than an alligator has teeth.

~ George Foreman ~

As men in the early stages of recovery, we often have felt that we were walking on rubber legs. We felt very shaky. We were ready to admit that our lives had become unmanageable, but to establish a more stable life seemed like an overwhelming challenge. We needed the support of others in the program who were ahead of us on this path. So we turned to our sponsors and to other people in our meetings who had walked these Steps before us.

As men who have longer sobriety, we know that we need to share our stories and help others to maintain our own lifesaving recovery. So we continue to attend our meetings as one part of our maintenance program. We become sponsors and share our tricks of recovery because it benefits us as much as the other guy.

Today, as a newcomer to recovery, or as one with more time in, I know that we all have a lot to give.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

In order to accept change and the suffering it brings, we need to find meaning in it.

~ Mary Norton Gordon ~

In the midst of upheaval, we may long for the security of the past. But when we recall earlier times, we realize change has always been nipping at our heels. We’re reminded that we survived each change, and we gain confidence that we’ll weather this storm too.

We don’t have to suffer just because we are experiencing change. While change may stir our emotions, we can cultivate excitement for the change rather than fear of it. Further, we can use our memories of other changes and the fruits they bore as our inspiration now for relishing the opportunities every change offers us.

Change will come if God thinks it is time for us to stretch our talents and deepen our wisdom. It may be hard to keep that in mind when we feel the dread of change, but our memories will serve us if we’ll let them.

Change is for my benefit, and my Higher Power is my benefactor. I’ll rejoice if something new beckons to me today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I see now that I can get better in time

When I realized I was sick, when I was first diagnosed with a dual disorder, I felt devastated. I wouldn't believe it. All I could foresee was more pain. And that scared me more.

But now that I've learned some things about my (no-fault) addiction and psychiatric illness, they scare me less. With the clarity that comes from knowledge and the passing of time, I see that my life can get better and I see how I can get back on track. As much as I wish all were well today, I accept that recovery will just take some time.

Today I will practice giving myself extra time to do the things I need to do.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We all rise again like the moon.
Our very best God makes us all rise again,
but never the same as before.
Always brand new.

~ Sr. Karol A. Jackowski ~

Great loss takes everything from us but in time gives back more than we lost. By grieving we shed the old and receive the new. At first we find it hard to believe a brighter day will come. When we look inside ourselves, we find only the hurt and remorse. As we grieve, we may deeply resent people who say “Time heals all wounds.” How can they minimize our loss by predicting its end?

In the middle of deep loss we may need only a hand on our shoulder and a silent message that says, “I’m here with you.” Then, as healing begins, we find ourselves filling up again, but in a different way. By surviving such pain we come to appreciate life in a new way. Our feelings are deeper, richer than before. We know about loss, and are more grateful for what we have. We are more trusting of our Higher Power, Who helped us find the strength to endure when we thought it would be too much for us. We’re learning that grief can bring newfound depths of beauty to our vision of life.

Today let me move through my healing process, trusting that I am being cared for by my Higher Power.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

~ Step Eleven ~

A prayer is a humble and heartfelt communication with a power greater than yourself. A prayer can admit a weakness, communicate a need, or convey praise and gratitude. Prayers can unburden your heart, give you strength and courage, and deepen your faith and trust in a Higher Power. Use the following prayer as you work on your understanding and acceptance of Step Eleven.

Step Eleven Prayer

Higher Power, I humbly ask that you make me an ambassador of your peace. Help me to understand your will for me so that I may carry out acts of kindness, respect, and love for myself and for others. I pray to you for continual guidance. I resolve to connect with you every day and in every way, so I may grow stronger and more sure of myself in recovery. Through such daily prayer, I trust in your assurance that I will follow the right path.

I promise to keep my connection with you for all of my days and nights. You will show me the way to live, free from addiction and fully engaged with my life. Higher Power, thank you for listening to my prayer.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When it gets dark enough, you can see the stars.

~ Lee Salk ~

The tiny points of light in the darkened sky have long been used to plot navigational courses. In fact, sailors trust the stars even more than their most sophisticated instruments. We, too, can look at the sky and find reassurance in its light.

Each star in the sky has meaning. Whether it's part of a major constellation or merely a pulsating, burning mass in the sky, there is a reason for that star to be there.

We are also stars in the night. We are not alone, for we share the expansive heavens with those around us, whether our nearest neighbor is one floor above us or miles away. We are all here for a purpose.

I know I am not alone tonight, for I can see the stars.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being inspired

Within any problem lies a seed of opportunity. Solutions to knotty circumstances come through spiritual inspiration. If we stay clean and sober, we can sense the inspiration. Instead of dragging us down, our problems can take us to new heights. Didn’t our addiction bring us a spiritual awakening?

Our Higher Power’s promises are sure. With every fear, we will hear that voice from within that stills our troubled minds.

Do I feel inspired?

I pray that I may do all I do with love and leave the results to my Higher Power.

I will seek inspiration today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

After distress, solace.

~ SWAHILI PROVERB ~

Newcomer

Something I've been deeply dreading for a long time has finally happened. I'm surprised that I'm feeling relief instead of misery. I wish I'd known sooner that I was going to feel this way.

Sponsor

I'm often startled to discover that my Higher Power doesn't have the same deadlines for my happiness that I myself have imagined. When my mother died after a long illness, many things ended, including the chance that she might still, after so many years, nurture me in the ways that I'd wished for. What I'd tried so hard to hold at bay had come. I was powerless, confronted with mortality. As I went through the grieving process, an energy I couldn't have previously imagined began to bubble up in me. I understood, at last, that I didn't have forever to live my own life. I plunged into a period of creativity. I moved to a place that was more congenial than where I'd been living. I went back into therapy to address some unresolved conflicts. I let go of work and relationships that were unsatisfying and made more time for pleasure. My fear was over; I'd gone through the worst and survived. I had a life to live and to celebrate.

What we envision as the end of everything can turn out to be the beginning of a more expansive period in our lives, an opening of perspectives we would have had no access to without going through loss, suffering, or failure.

Today, changes I've feared do not destroy me; they open doors to the unexpected.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

If life is only a preparation for something yet to come, as many believe, then the manner of our living will determine the success or failure in this preparation. It would naturally follow, therefore, that a man could not live a devil and die a saint.

We do not feel that we are qualified to evaluate the worth of deathbed repentance but this we do feel—if you live right, deathbed repentance would hardly seem necessary.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Uselessness and Self-Pity

Dear Lord, when I was deep within the bewilderment and agony of my addition, I often moaned, "What's the use? Nobody cares." I was a lost person. I thought I was incapable of doing anything worthwhile for anyone, including myself. Shame and guilt made me wallow in self-pity. By working the Program and focusing on positive things, I have changed. I have become more useful to myself and others. By recognizing my limitations and avoiding perfectionism, I've moved away from self-pity toward self-worth.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

FORESIGHT AND HINDSIGHT

When you have to make a decision or take a certain action, all that you can do is to do the best you know at that time, and if you do that you will have done your duty. In the light of after events it may turn out that you made a mistake, but that will not be your fault because you could not possibly do better than the best you know at the time.

Claim that the Christ is guiding you; and believe it, and the ultimate outcome will be favorable even if things seem to go wrong for a time.

And the Lord shall guide thee continually . . . (Isaiah 58:11).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

President of the Inner States

Confront the dark parts of yourself and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.

~ August Wilson ~

I am angry at myself because I failed in my goal of becoming president of the United States by 1996," Jerry stated. "It was my lifelong ambition, and I am ashamed that I have not completed my mission.”

"What would you do if you were President?" I asked.

"I would free the country of oppression," Jerry answered vehemently.

"It sounds as if you have been oppressing yourself by beating yourself for not attaining your goal," I suggested. "Perhaps you could begin to free the country of oppression by releasing yourself. If you quit beating yourself up emotionally, you might not need to be president; maybe your aspiration for the office was a reflection of your desire for your own freedom."

Jesus instructed, "Before you attempt to remove a speck from the eye of another, take the log out of your own eye.” Masterful psychology and metaphysics! When we feel driven to fix the outer world, it is really our inner world we are seeking to improve. While it is tempting to project our need onto others, it is really inner transformation we seek.

It is useless to try to change another person unless we have first changed ourselves. A Course in Miracles asks us, “Can the world be saved if you are not?" Our primary responsibility is the healing of our own mind. With our own self purified, we are in a perfect position to see how we can truly be of service.

Help me to heal my own mind so that I may be a pure channel of blessing. Help me to awaken, and let me not be seduced by projecting my needs onto others.

I look within for truth and improve the world by transforming my own consciousness.

[bluidkiti]

November 2

Step by Step

” …(Y)ou are ready to take certain steps.
“At some of these we balked. We thought we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all the earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 5 (“How It Works”), p 58.

Today, I stand on a precipice that appears uncertain and terrifying, at least as much as the certainty and terror of continued drinking. But I must begin recovery. If I don’t, the certain terror of an alcoholic disintegration or death are all that await me. And as I set out on this journey, grant me the wisdom to yield to the experience of those who have already been where I am headed, and the humility to seek and do only the will of whatever higher power I find. Let me also understand completely and be willing and ready to accept whatever change comes about as I hopefully leave behind those days of drinking and take on whatever changes sobriety brings. Today, if I am setting out on the path toward recovery, let me be know and appreciate how demanding it will be and that I must be “fearless and thorough from the very start.” Anything less is a prescription for certain relapse. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

CHEERFULNESS

Cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.

~ Joseph Addison ~

All spiritual growth points us toward serenity. When we find it, we also find a cheerful attitude. When we feel at peace with the world we "put on a happy face." In our Program, we refer to that state as being "happy, joyous, and free."

Cheerfulness is a personal choice. It begins with our acceptance of reality as we continue to grow spiritually. When we give our cheerfulness to others, we are also keeping for ourselves the peace that emotional growth brings us.

Cheerfulness is a big part of a positive attitude. Without it, we wouldn't be able to accept the things we need to accept. Cheerfulness can't exist without freedom.

Peace of mind and serenity are never forced on me. I must have an open heart and open mind to receive it.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

It is not the employer who pays—he only handles the money. It is the product that pays wages.

~ Henry Ford ~

Our work gives us meaning and can be the source of many good feelings. Even when we wish we had a better job, we feel good when we do the job we have well. Sometimes at work we get caught up in resentments or personal feelings that tear down our self-esteem. The best tonic for negative feelings at work is to focus on doing a good job, regardless of all the other issues we have to deal with.

Whether we are building complex technical equipment, cutting meat, or managing a team, the product we turn out is the bottom line. It expresses our character. In the long run, an excellent performance will come back to reward us. Knowing that we gave it our best is a source of inner pride.

Today I know that self-respect comes from doing my job well.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I truly want to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

~ Kathy Kendall ~

Honestly assessing how we perceive our experiences reveals how prone we are to create problems. Seeing the glass as half-empty is a habit, perhaps one we can’t imagine breaking. Fortunately, now we are surrounded by the good example of other people. Through listening at meetings we learn that the women we most admire understand our outlook. They have had it too.

We are in the company every day of women who have changed in the very ways we want to change. No matter how hopeless we feel at times, their very presence reminds us that we can do what they have done. Turning to their Higher Power was their solution. And that’s ours too. We can turn to our Higher Power every time we begin to dwell on some experience, making it a bigger problem than it needs to be. Turning to our Higher Power becomes easier with practice and, in time, newcomers will admire our perspective, just as we have admired the perspective of others.

I can emulate the good example of other people today rather than getting stuck in a problem. It’s all in how I look at my opportunities.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

My appetite is returning

It's been a while since I cared much about eating (this is not like me). My old favorites didn't appeal to me and trying new foods was out of the question.

But I am happy to report that my appetite is getting better. Recently I had a craving for a cookie—and sure enough, it tasted good. As much as I love cookies, I'm looking forward to regaining my interest in other foods, too.

In my journal I will make a note of my two favorite foods, my two favorite meals, and one person I like to share meals with.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

I finally realized my family needs to understand what I’m going through, and now I can share that with them.

~ Ken J. ~

During active addiction we often became secretive, hiding our behavior out of shame and fear of rejection. Our families and friends didn’t know what was happening with us, how we felt, or what our lives were like. Now they may feel baffled again about what is happening to us. They may feel resentful or jealous when we spend time away from them.

We must always maintain the anonymity of others in our Twelve Step fellowship, but we can explain how a meeting works, why it’s important to our recovery, and what it brings to our lives. We can explain the meaning of a Higher Power and the important role our sponsor plays in our recovery. We can talk about program principles such as powerlessness, letting go, and surrender.

Talking about our recovery program is a wonderful way to share our lives and our feelings with family and friends. We can reassure them and help them understand the process of change. By sharing with them, we welcome our families and friends into our new lives in a loving way.

Today help me share my recovery with those who are dose to me.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Everything gives birth to something... I water the peach, peaches feed me

~ Mike Garofalo ~

November is often viewed as the beginning of the season in which nature becomes dormant and many cycles of growth cease. And yet within such dormancy lies growth. Bulbs and seeds are entering a cycle in which they are preparing for future growth in the spring. Animals ensure their survival for the warmer months by growing thicker coats that will protect them from harsh temperatures and weather.

So too do you need to engage in continual growth as you go through similar cycles of activity and inactivity, Each day offers the opportunity to renew your energy and commitment to recovery. Each person you meet offers companionship and support so you are reassured that you are not facing your challenges alone. And each time you engage in daily prayer and meditation, you develop and strengthen your spiritual connection.

When you view each day as a time for a new beginning, you are building a stronger future and enhancing your quality of life. Consider that everything you do, everything you see, and everything you hear is enhancing your growth now, and in the future.

Today I will continue to grow in positive ways.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Our daily thoughts should be elevated above the ceiling.

~ W W. Loflin ~

How optimistic are we? Do we see problems as solvable or impossible? Do we see our abilities as expanding or limited? Do we set goals for ourselves, or do we feel goals are unattainable?

Not everyone can scale the highest mountain or find the Titanic or survive great disasters. We can't all be president of the country or director of our department. But elevating our daily thoughts above the ceiling doesn't mean we have to strive for recognition or undertake the most difficult tasks. All we really have to do is believe we are good people, capable of enjoying health and happiness. That belief can buoy us up against any obstacle.

We can learn to raise our thoughts whenever they start to go down. First, we can say we are inherently good. Then we can show others our goodness by being kind, friendly, and helpful. Finally, we can ask that our spirits be kept high by the help of our Higher Power. By doing these things, there is no limit to how good we can feel.

I can learn to raise my thoughts when they start to go down.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Becoming selfless

Only through the grace of our Higher Power can we feel peace and serenity. We know that self and self-based decisions end in pain. We have to replace self with love. If our hearts are full of our egos, there is no room for a Higher Power.

We begin to become selfless when we recognize that we need a Higher Power in our lives. We have learned from experience that no other way works for us. This does! The only point in talking about self is to know what we’re trying to be free of, what we’re substituting for a Higher Power.

Am I a selfless person now?

Higher Power, let me put a little more of you into a place where I still have much self.

I will do things for others today, such as

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

When you pray you are opening a window within yourself.

~ GURUDEV SHREE CHITRABHANU ~

Newcomer

I don't know if I can pray the way I'm supposed to.

Sponsor

There's no wrong way to pray, no place or time, no posture or language, that's inappropriate. We can pray anywhere. Some of us pray on our knees; some pray while sitting, standing, walking, or performing sacred movements. Some of us use prayers from the religion we claim as ours, some use prayers found in program literature, and some of us write our own. Many prayers are said spontaneously. Some prayers may even be unconscious or involuntary. All are holy.

Prayer can be a medium for expressing gratitude, joy, and acceptance of what is; it can be a cry for help or understanding; it can be a reaching out for relationship, an attempt to find our way to the Spirit, or a means of maintaining contact with our inner guidance. I've heard someone in recovery say that prayer may come before we find out who or what our Higher Power is. Most of us, once we have the habit of prayer, find it a necessity.

Today, I nourish myself with prayer.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Have you ever visited the General Service Headquarters in New York? Do you have any conception of the vast amount of work that passes through the Foundation every year?

It is highly possible that your Group would not exist today were it not for them. It is likewise probable that if your Group did not exist you would still be beating your brains out.

The New York Office is functioning beautifully but they require the support of every Group to do so. Make it your business to see that your Group is doing its share.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Losing Interest in Selfish Things

God, help me choose the path away from selfish things. I came into the Program an expert in dishonesty, deceit, envy, and grandiosity. Selfishness fitted me well. I was shameless in the ways I took advantage of and manipulated other people. Help me remember that selfishness and self-centeredness are a product of a sick ego. God, I must remember, every minute, that my reborn purpose in this new way of living is to help other people.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

A SMILE IS AN INVESTMENT

Most people feel intuitively that the simplest things in life are the most important, or, if you prefer, that the most important things in life are found to be the simplest. This is a very profound discovery. What is more important to us than breathing, for instance?

Another simple thing that is of great moment is a smile. A smile affects your whole body from the skin right in to the skeleton, including all blood vessels, nerves, and muscles. It affects the functioning of every organ. It influences every gland. Even one smile often relaxes a number of muscles, and when the thing becomes a habit you can easily see how the effect will mount up. Last year's smiles are paying you dividends today.

The effect of a smile on other people is no less remarkable. It disarms suspicion, melts away fear and anger, and brings forth the best in the other person-which best he immediately proceeds to give to you.

A smile is to personal contacts what oil is to machinery, and no intelligent engineer ever neglects lubrication.

Rejoice evermore (1 Thessalonians 5:16).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Unforeseen Circumstances

Never make forecasts, especially about the future.

~ Samuel Goldwyn ~

I was taken aback to read a newspaper article about a convention of psychics that had been canceled “due to unforeseen circumstances.” If we can’t depend on a group of professional psychics to know their own future, who can we look to? Is the future knowable? Can anyone truly predict what will happen?

A psychic, seer, or prophet can look down the road and see likely out–comes of actions and attitudes that are currently in motion. But at any moment, a human being can make a new decision and alter the course of events. A good psychic always leaves room for free will. Because we are imbued by God with the power to create, we can re-create our life at any time.

Experts in worldly sciences, too, make predictions based on history and trends. A doctor may tell you your chances of recovery, an economist may forecast market cycles, and an astrologer may indicate fortuitous times to act. But all of these predictions are based on you and others continuing what has always been done. If you choose a different course, you will create a different destiny. “Terminal cancer,” for example, is a very dishonest term. A long time ago, I read that more persons have survived cancer than make up the population of Los Angeles. I am certain that that number has increased immensely by now. I know of support groups for “former terminal cancer patients"—now there is a beautiful oxymoron!

You have the power to create unforeseen circumstances. You were not born to be a statistic; you were born to be ecstatic. Choose your own destiny, and live by your own rules, not the world’s.

Help me to live by the laws of love and create the future I choose.

I step forward into the world I create by my choice.

[bluidkiti]

November 3

Step by Step

“There is no more ‘aloneness,’ with that awful ache, so deep in the heart of every alcoholic that nothing, before, could ever reach it. That ache is gone and never need return again.
‘Now there is a sense of belonging, of being wanted and needed and loved. In return for a bottle and a hangover, we have been given the Keys of the Kingdom.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Personal Stories, Pioneers of AA,” Ch 12 (“The Keys of the Kingdom”), p 312.

Today, no minimizing or taking for granted that we have been given “the keys of the kingdom” by surrendering in Step One and then proceeding to the nuts and bolts of the Program. We also cannot take for granted that the keys given us won’t be taken away in a disastrous split second in which we cave into self-pity, anger, remorse or hopelessness and pick up the bottle again. If we do, perhaps the single most anguishing emotion of alcoholism – desperate loneliness – once again will engulf us and all that we have worked for thus far will lay in ruins. But, today, we need not cave into those temptations or our self-defeating character defects if we internalize the Steps and their principles, and they can and will get us through any situation and over any mountain of any height. Today, I will not trade my “keys to the kingdom” for “just one more.” And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FIXING OTHERS

Don't fix; be supportive.

~ Anonymous ~

If it was within our capacity to fix people's lives, we would have done so a long time ago with all our friends and relatives. We finally realized in our First Step how hopelessly mismatched we were for the job of fixing ourselves and the whole world. Most of us struggled for years to fix our own lives, but we couldn't. It was not until we admitted we were licked that we finally got the help we needed. By working the other Eleven Steps, we came to believe that a Power greater than we could fix what we couldn't.

Our role in life changes as a result of the Steps. We watch the way God might be moving in the life of a friend or loved one, and we aim to support God's handiwork. We watch the ways our sponsor offers support, always encouraging us to accept situations we cannot change, or getting back to change situations we can.

When I try to fix others, it doesn't work very well. All I can really do is be supportive in their efforts and focus on fixing myself.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Change and growth take place when a person has risked himself and dares to become involved with experimenting with his life.

~ Herbert Otto ~

On our path, we take the unique circumstances that life presents and seek ways to use them in positive ways. Our path is long, with many turns and bends that lead beyond what we can see in advance. The most cautious person might hold back from the unknown and try desperately to control the future. Risk-taking is an important ingredient in good mental health because it opens possibilities to us that the safest choices will never give us.

We have taken unwise risks in the past and now we are tempted, in recovery, to hold tightly to safety. But a balanced life calls us to take constructive risks. We might risk asking someone to be our sponsor, even when we don’t know how he will respond. We might risk letting ourselves fall more deeply in love than we have ever been before. We might risk telling a friend about a long-held secret, simply to let him know us better. We might risk applying for a job that will challenge us. There is room for us to try something, miss our mark, and still learn from the experience.

Today I will feel the thrill and excitement of taking a constructive risk.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I honor every woman who has strength enough to step out of the beaten path when she feels that her walk lies in another, strength enough to stand up and be laughed at, if necessary.

~ Harriet Hosmer ~

It’s never been easy for women to dare to be different. The messages that surround us seldom encourage us to pursue unconventional passions. Fortunately, we who are on this recovery journey get personal guidance from our Higher Power and our sponsors as we pursue the opportunities that beckon to us along new paths. We know, perhaps better than most, that we’ll be protected and directed each step of the way.

We have gathered to make this journey together. We have needed each other all along; now we have each other every step of the way. We will find the strength we need from one another. We will joyfully follow our passions and find the happiness we deserve.
I am on my way to fulfillment. Even when my path veers away from others, I’m in the company of my Higher Power and my friends.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am beginning to see I need help

I used to wish everybody would just leave me alone about how much I was drinking or how I was acting. I thought Why should I get into treatment or go to Twelve Step meetings? I don't have a problem. And I don't like my friends for saying I do.

I was angry. I felt like running away I didn't like feeling rejected or being told what to do. But this was a little scary too. I had thoughts like, What if my friends are right after all? What if I do have a problem? What do I do then? I'm upset. This is confusing. I need to think about this some more. I still think this way sometimes. Now I know what I have to do.

Today I will call my sponsor or best friend and talk about what's going on with me.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Lay hold of today’s task, and you will not depend so much on tomorrow’s.

~ Seneca ~

Our only true home on this earth is our body, and, though we might have abused it in the past, it is still keeping us in this life. We can reward ourselves for a good day by taking a long bath, eating a healthy meal, or getting some exercise. Our body will pay us back with the glow of good feelings.

We have sometimes been sad or tense or angry and have not known how to rescue a day from disaster. Often the secret is held in the body itself. A walk in the park gives us time to reflect on our many gifts, and brings us fresh air and exercise. A nutritious meal helps restore our strength. In our recovery, we are learning to keep our balance, and that means including the body in our healing.

When we become aware of our physical selves, we can become more grateful for our second chance in life. Our bodies don’t demand much in return — only that when we are hungry, we eat, and when we are tired, we rest. Our eyes still see the beauty in the world, our ears still hear the wisdom of friends and fellows, and our arms still share hugs.

Today help me remember to treat my physical self with love.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

When everything seems like an uphill struggle, just think of the view from the top.

~ Author unknown ~

One slogan you may often hear in recovery is “Easy does it.” You may even say it to yourself or to others, but what does it really mean?

At those times when you are feeling stressed or de-pressed, you may wonder, “How is it even possible to take things easy?” When you are going through a difficult time, feel angry, or are hurt by what someone has said, the last thing you may want to do is think “Easy does it." Instead, you may want to scream, cry, or crawl into a dark hole.

But “Easy does it” reminds you to think before you respond. It provides you with the opportunity to sit back, catch your breath, and reflect on what is really going on. You may find that the way in which you want to respond is an overreaction. You may discover you are taking things too personally or seriously. Or you may learn that you are striving to be overly responsible and have overbooked your day. “Easy does it” reminds you that you are only one person. You cannot do everything or be everything to everyone, but you are someone and you can do something.

I will use “Easy does it” to set limits that are right for me.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.

~ Theodore Roosevelt ~

Suppose we were walking down a street when someone came over to us and said, "I want you for our Olympic volleyball team." We may protest, saying we haven't had the training or haven't developed the skills or even allowed time for this to happen.

Yet we may treat the program as a different kind of example. We may jump right in and expect we'll grasp all the Steps and slogans, suddenly have a marvelous relationship with our Higher Power, and be ready to sponsor every fledgling that walks through the door.

We can't join the Olympics today, and we certainly can't expect to master the work of the program today either. Each takes a great deal of time to develop the necessary skills. Each requires a dedication and perseverance that strengthen us as we grow stronger and more confident. Each requires us to feel like we're part of a team, which can't happen unless we meet all the members of the team and work with them. Tonight we're doing the best we can, with what we have, right where we are in recovery.

Tonight I can participate as a member of an active recovery team, but I'm not ready yet to be the most valuable player. I need more time to work with myself and the team.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Expressing gratitude

Gratitude is more than just being thankful. The principle of gratitude is a moral responsibility. If we are truly grateful, we will help others achieve what we have achieved. Next is the priority of gratitude. As soon as we know that God has changed our lives, we must let nothing interfere with what we know to be right.

The propriety of gratitude shows us that our Higher Power is not a respecter of per-sons, and we deserve its grace as much as anyone else does. Then the purpose of our gratitude is not entirely for the benefit of the one blessed. The purpose is to shed light on the one who blessed us.

Do my actions reflect my gratitude?

Higher Power, help me always to remember to be grateful for what I have been blessed with and let me fully understand the magnitude of gratitude.

I will show my gratitude today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

After my morning's talk with God I go into my laboratory and begin to carry out His wishes for the day.

~ GEORGE WASHINGTON CARVER ~

Newcomer

How do I know if I'm doing my Higher Power's will? Does my Higher Power really care what I do for a living, whom I associate with, what I eat for dinner? Or is praying for knowledge of my Higher Power's will for me just about morality?

Sponsor

Morality isn't the whole story, but it's part of it. Most of us have a good idea of what ethical behavior is. There are many guides for living, both religious and secular, but few of us need to rely on books for the answers. We know what's right or wrong by consulting our conscience.

It does matter what we do. You mention making choices about food and friends and work. These aren't trivial things; they're the stuff of our lives. Any choice can bring us closer to the truth or further from it, can lead us toward addiction or recovery. Prayer and meditation illuminate these choices. They help us to know ourselves.

My relationship with the Spirit comes from looking within. For me, Step Eleven is a reminder that I have the responsibility to bring my life into alignment with the deepest desires of my soul. Love, joy, gratitude—I've come to believe that these are necessities. My Higher Power's will for me includes nourishment for my spirit.

God's will for me is written in my inmost being. Today, I read it with ease and joy.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Our philosophy of living does not reach as far as immortality—it concerns itself with living this life one day at a time.

We do feel, however, that if we live this day to the best of our ability, endeavoring each day to improve over the preceding day, then when the time comes for us to consider immortality, we will be in a very favorable position, to say the least.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Self-Seeking Slips Away

Today, God, help me remember not everything is about me. When I was using, thinking of myself was my whole existence. With abstinence, I began to practice understanding, humility, gratitude, caring, and sharing with others. By having faith in our Programs recovery Steps and their other-centeredness focus, I am reminded that I am a person who truly needs other people.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THEORETICAL CENTIPEDE

Do not dissect things too much. By the time you have dissected a living thing you have killed it, and you no longer have the thing that you began with. Take a rose out of the bowl, pull its petals apart, count them, weigh them, measure them, and then, while you will have certain interesting information, you no longer have a rose.

There is a place for analysis, but it is apt to be quite fatal in prayer and meditation. Do not dissect the love of God, but feel it. Do not dissect divine intelligence, but realize it. Do not wonder how God can possibly solve this problem, but just watch Him do it in His own way—and He will if you will give Him a chance.

You know that God is Love. So go ahead on that, and do not get theoretical about it.

Do you remember the old verse that says:

A centipede was happy quite,
Until a frog in fun
Said, "Pray, which leg comes after which?"
This raised her mind to such a pitch,
She lay distracted in the ditch,
Considering how to run.

The righteous shall be glad in the Lord, and shall trust in him; and all the upright in heart shall glory (Psalm 64:10).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

A New Face in the Mirror

Behold, I make all things new.

~ Revelation 21:5 ~

A television news magazine reported on a group of cosmetic surgeons who are donating their services to women whose faces have been disfigured from battering and abuse. I was astounded to behold bruised, beaten, and scarred faces restored to smooth–ness and softness through skillful surgery. Even more amazing was the energetic transformation these women exuded when they looked in the mirror and for the first time in many years saw a countenance of beauty. Each of them laughed and shed tears of joy and appreciation; they never thought they would see a whole face again.

On some level, each of us has felt beaten or battered by the world. And on some level, each of us has feared to look in the mirror, terrified that the scars we see will remind us of the pain we have accepted or inflicted on ourselves.

Grace is available, and our life can be made new at any time. No matter how disfigured we appear or how grotesque we feel, we can become reformed and renewed. We do not have to see a cosmetic surgeon. The most skillful surgery takes place when we open our minds and hearts to become new and allow Spirit to shine through us.

Let me see a new face in the mirror. Let me open my eyes and heart to the beauty I have forgotten. Renew my life by renewing my mind and my vision.

I create a new life by thinking new thoughts. My life is changed because I am.

[bluidkiti]

November 4

Step by Step

Today, focus on making the faith I have been given as a gift of intelligence rather than an emotional one. As an alcoholic, my emotions are usually in excess – and anything in excess is risky, including faith if I ground it in emotion. By striving for an intelligent faith, I hope to remove the influence of my unsteady emotions on the faith I need – one in which I have unconditional trust in my Higher Power as opposed to one in which I let my feelings challenge His will. And with an intelligent faith rather than an emotional one, hopefully those things I cannot control can be more faithfully surrendered to my Higher Power and, as a result, hopefully I will take a step toward the goal of total faith, hope and charity. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SECURITY

I'm gonna stand my ground, won't be turned around, and I'll keep this world from draggin' me down. Gonna stand my ground, and I won't back down.

~ Tom Petty ~

Security is the result of a dedicated effort toward a goal. We feel secure in our Fellowship, some more, some less. Security comes from the safety and confidence we get from building on the working principles of our Program of spiritual growth.

We know that our progress can never be taken away from us by force or under-handed dealings of others. Our belief in the security of the Program defies those who try to betray our trust or draw us back into addiction. Security is the knowledge that it is possible for the most hopeless and helpless victims of any addiction to find recovery. Security is also a shield against our own acts of carelessness or feelings of overconfidence.

I have come to feel secure in the Program and my recovery. I won't let others or myself bring me down.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. ~

What darkness do we feel in our lives today? Are we troubled by a relationship? Is guilt about past mistakes clouding our peace of mind? Do we feel threatened by a challenge that looms before us? Perhaps we live with an illness or we feel trapped by our life’s circumstances. Darkness is universal. It is one side of the coin of life.

We cannot not respond to this darkness. The question always is, how will we respond? Many times our established ways of responding to our situation only perpetuate the problem. So we must now seek a way to respond differently. We can do the counterintuitive thing. If we can forgive ourselves, it is easier to forgive others. If we first calm ourselves in the face of challenge instead of letting ourselves panic, we will bring our better self to cope with it. If we respond to anger and hate with genuine loving honesty, we may change the nature of a relationship. Light and love are also universal, and we can choose to walk in the light.

Today I will respond with calmness and a loving frame of mind.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I will never be able to feel the love someone wants to give to me unless I am loving myself

~ Betty MacDonald ~

Loving ourselves sounds so simple, but how do we do it? Learning more about who we are is a good first step. The Fourth Step inventory leaves little doubt about who we are, providing we are vulnerably honest. And after acknowledging who we are, we can begin the process of accepting what we can and changing what we need to. Self-love is the reward for carefully doing our work.

The shame we feel for the person we think we are makes it hard to believe others could love us. Getting a more balanced view of ourselves changes our perspective. It becomes easier to love ourselves when we acknowledge how hard we are working to change. We want love. We deserve to be loved. We must be the initiators.

Loving myself may take effort, but if I remember that I'm doing the best I can, and then do it, today will be easier.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to make new friends

Because of my addiction and mental health problems, I don't have many friends—I gave up most of them. I got stable and sober, but they wanted me to keep using.

So now I'm trying to make new friends at my recovery meetings. Usually, I feel shy and awkward. I guess I'm afraid of them—no chemicals to lower my inhibition—and maybe they're afraid of me. Yet I am tired of all my fear. I'm a good person who can be a good friend. Maybe it's up to me to break the ice.

I will pray for courage, and at my next meeting, I will start a conversation with a member of my group.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.

~ Helen Keller ~

Constantly living in the past is as harmful as always dreaming about the future. It leaves no time for making the most of the present. But we can use what we’ve learned about the past to make healthy choices about the future. In recovery, we learn to look with forgiveness and without shame at who we were. Gradually, we develop a desire to live in our lives today without dwelling on the past.

Because recovery helps us make peace with all the warring elements in ourselves, we can move into our new selves and our renewed lives, with greater security and serenity, as a whole person.

We still may think about all that might have been or all that may be. That’s useful. But to dream is different than to dwell with anger and resentment, and now we can tell the difference. Now we know that making peace with our past frees us from that obsessive backward glance — frees us to see what lies ahead. Now we can face the future with serenity and continued spiritual growth.

Today help me lay one more chapter of my past to rest. Free me from my regrets.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We are members of a vast cosmic orchestra in which each living instrument is essential to the complementary and harmonious playing of the whole.

~ J. Allen Boone ~

Migrating geese fly in a magnificent V pattern in the sky. As beautiful as this pattern is, it also serves a meaningful and useful purpose. When a bird flies slightly behind the bird in front, it experiences a reduction in wind resistance. With less resistance, the tailing geese have an easier flight and can endure longer before they tire. Because the birds must fly great distances to reach their new homes, they will often shift positions in flight; as one grows tired, it will fall back and enjoy an easier flight behind the goose that has conserved its energy.

The V formation also serves another useful purpose, which has been replicated by military pilots. With each goose in clear sight, it is easier to monitor all members o( the group and to communicate important information, Your recovery can be seen in a similar way. When you are weak, others can strengthen you. When you are strong you can empower others. Share your journey with others, and the path to your recovery will be that much easier in follow.

I am connected to everyone in recovery. I share in their journey and need to be united with them so everyone can stay strong.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Free will is not the liberty to do whatever one likes, but the power of doing whatever one sees ought to be done, even in the very face of otherwise overwhelming impulse.

~ George MacDonald ~

There are certain things we cannot do, whether they are restricted by law, are moral issues, or are safety concerns. We may know this now, but in the past this fact may have meant little to us. We may have driven drunk, beaten partners, or verbally or sexually abused our children.

Free will doesn't mean we can do anything we please. Free will means doing things like changing bad tempers, drinking habits, or unacceptable behaviors. With free will, we have the choice to make changes, even though they may be difficult.

Nothing is impossible if it is within our control. We can use free will to opt for change and improvement. With free will, we can choose when and how we will change. If we choose, we can begin tonight.

Are there changes or improvements I can make in my life? Help me know I'm free to change these things whenever I'm ready.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Expressing love

Our fellowship is saturated with love and caring. We can touch one another and know that it comes from the Spirit. In the beginning, some confuse this love with sexual desire. A man may cringe when first embraced by another man, but the love we receive from our Higher Power is pure and needs no justification.

An embrace is an embrace of love. Now, we can freely express our love for each other. It’s the same love that flows from our Higher Power. All true expression of love is good.

Do I know how to express my love outwardly?

Higher Power, let me express love from you in some way today, if only by touching another’s hand.

Today I will openly express my love to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Come what may, I have been blessed.

~ GEORGE GORDON, LORD BYRON ~

Newcomer

People are always saying, "There are no coincidences." I don't know what that really means or what to think about it. If some Higher Power cares about me, then what about the years when I was active in my addiction? Where was my Higher Power then?

Sponsor

Miracles don't all happen instantaneously. The desire to heal was in me long before I was able to enter recovery, but I didn't understand or acknowledge it. I didn't even know what was wrong with me. The process of identifying my central problem as one of addiction—and of beginning to hear that there was help for me—didn't happen overnight.

Recovery is such an immense gift in our lives that it's hard to understand how it happened. Many of us were led to it with the help of a particular person who seemed to appear at the critical moment. For some, a seemingly chance phone call or encounter influenced our decision to come to a meeting. We may feel as if we were brought here at exactly the right time. And it's true—we were!

I thank my Higher Power for this day, and for every day leading to this day.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

A large number of people come into AA antagonistic to Churches, yet most everyone recognizes the fact that Churches have a vital role to play in the development of civilization generally.

If religions are not what they ought to be, it is because we are not what we ought to be. The Church's failure is man's failure. Man is the culprit that relegated spirituality to second place behind creeds and dogmas.

Instead of Churches leading men, men are leading Churches.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Attitude and Outlook

God, help me to work on a positive attitude and outlook in my life. Help me adapt to the real world no matter how different and difficult it seems. During my addiction, I tried to escape reality and live in a world of fantasy. Recovery has taught me I can't change the facts of living, but 1 can change my attitude toward them. Today, I will learn new attitudes toward life's challenges and practice new solutions by working the Program. I'm learning to live in the real word with a healthy attitude and outlook.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE GOOD GOD

God knows everything, and at all times. The Bible sometimes speaks of God as having changed His mind or being disappointed. God is supposed to have tested Abraham's obedience in the matter of Isaac. God is supposed to have had His plans upset by the misconduct of Adam and Eve, by the general wickedness of humanity before the flood, and, in fact, He is frequently represented as being disappointed and even frustrated by the conduct of mankind. In orthodox theology, the devil was continually upsetting God's arrangements and bringing his plans to naught. Indeed, to listen to some preachers, one would have supposed that the devil was a good deal more powerful than God.

Of course, alt this is nonsense. Such things could not be really true of God. It was Abraham's idea of God that led him to prepare to kill Isaac. It was the wickedness of mankind in the antediluvian world that brought on the flood as a natural consequence, just as the fears, hatreds, jealousies, and greed of mankind over many years have brought on war.

We make an idolatrous image of ourselves and call it God. Let us destroy this image today and worship the true God who is infinite and unchanging Good.

God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent. . . (Numbers 23:19).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Follow Your Star

On the whole, as this wondrous planet, Earth, is journeying with its fellows through infinite space, so are the wondrous destinies embarked on it journeying through infinite Time, under a higher guidance than ours.

~ Thomas Carlyle ~

Every winter, the magnificent humpback whales come to Maui. In a basin about 30 miles in diameter, these gentle giants play, mate, sing their haunting songs, and give birth. In April, the humpbacks return to the north Pacific, where they feed until they return the following December. Astonishingly, the same whales return to precisely the same place every year. Although they traverse three or four thousand miles in each direction, they pinpoint the same tiny basin in the middle of a huge ocean.

To me, this is compelling proof that the Great Spirit has imbued all creatures with the wisdom to be in their right place at the right time. The blueprint of our destiny is etched deep into our psyche, along with the guidance to achieve it. As spiritual beings, we have the capacity to find the place in life where we feel most at home. Each of us has a right living situation, relationship, career, and spiritual path that our internal guidance system will show us if we relax and cooperate. We don't have to add any intelligence; we just need to let go of all thoughts and activities that obscure our innate knowledge.

Should you doubt your ability to fulfill your destiny, remember the whales. Consider dogs and cats who find their way home after being lost many miles away, and remember the birds who fly south for the winter and return to the same backyard in the north. If God cares so carefully for the birds, surely we are known and loved, and our way shall be made clear.

I place my life in Your hands, trusting that You always lead me to my right place and my highest good.

I give my life to God to guide me today.

[bluidkiti]

November 5

Step by Step

Today, if I woke up sober and went through the day without a drink, if I did at work, home or wherever else what I was expected to do and did it without complaining and maybe even thanked my Higher Power for something good, if I reacted with logic and ethics and without emotions like anger, fear or revenge, if I am ending this day without a drink, a hit or a pill, then today was good. For that I owe gratitude and indebtedness to AA and its members who have ever been part of my journey from the despair of emptiness, loneliness, drunkenness, fear and a shattered soul. Tonight, I am grateful because I am sober – and, God granting, I will awaken sober. Today, it was good. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

CRISES

A problem shared is a problem halved.

~ Anonymous ~

Working the Steps strengthens us to meet crises head on. Above all, the Steps show us that we never need to fear problems like we did in the old days. We learn to face crises with confidence and a faith in our ability to cope. When a crisis brings us up against a problem that is a complete surprise, we meet it with an effort to do the best we can. We ask the help of others and our Higher Power.

Crises come in all sizes. They can be minor annoyances or earthshaking adventures, but we know that we must always confront a crisis as soon as it develops. Recovery doesn't promise us a life without crises, but a better way in dealing with them. Helping others in trouble and giving away the knowledge we have been given by coping with crises helps us grow spiritually.

Today, I'll remember to face crises when they happen, and cope with them. I will ask for help when I need it.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The will to win means nothing without the will to prepare.

~ Juma Ikangaa, Tanzanian runner ~

Recovery and healing are not a matter of triumphantly grasping victory in our hands, no matter how much we might want to do that. Rather, our part is the hard work of getting ourselves ready to receive the healing that comes to us. The Twelve Steps are the work of preparing ourselves. We can work at learning what it means to surrender; we can work at taking personal inventory—and these things help prepare us.

The healing comes when we are ready, not as something we bought and paid for, but as a gift in response to being ready.

Today I will continue to work to ready myself to receive the gifts of recovery.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We are following a mystery we can never understand until we experience it.

~ Jacquelyn Small ~

How many times have we exclaimed, “If only I had known that was going to happen!” We think we’d be better off knowing the future before it arrives. It’s quite by design that we don’t, however. We are given all the information we need when we need it, just as we are given the experiences that fit the plan that God has for our lives.

It helps to reflect a few moments each time we fear the unknown. We’ll easily recall that much of the past confused us at first, but all of our experiences dovetailed appropriately, bringing us here, now. And our lives no longer look mysterious given the gift of hindsight.

We are on a charted course to a planned destination. We will understand our role in this life when the proper time presents itself. Until then, let’s enjoy the mystery.

My life is special and fully understood by my Higher Power. I’ll get glimpses of understanding as I need them today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to let people know me better

People ask me how I'm doing these days, but even if I could tell them, would they understand? At my support group, people often seem like strangers. Nobody knows me. Would they accept me if they did? I'm lonely.

It's hard for me to trust anyone right now. I'm afraid to let anyone get close. And yet people seem to want to help me. If I let them, maybe I could make friends. I know I would feel stronger and less lonely if I did. Maybe now is the time to let go of some of my fear.

At my next meeting, I will practice being friendly and make eye contact with my fellow members.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Despairing adults seem to forget that they can take care of themselves, and that they can solve most problems alone.

~ Brenda Schaeffer ~

All of us were frightened as children. None of us had all our needs met growing up and as adults we are left with the challenge of filling in the empty places. Sometimes we get so lost in the pain of our past that we bring that “frightened child” into our daily lives and feel small and powerless again.

Learning to grieve the losses of our past and, at the same time, to claim our power as adults, brings balance and direction to our lives. As adults we have the ability to take hold of our lives and make healthy changes. We are no longer powerless children, but choice-makers who deserve to be happy and have our dreams come true.

In moments of panic and indecision it helps to remember that life is different today. We do have choices. We can make good decisions. We have the resources to follow through on healthy choices. Remembering we are powerful, gifted, and resourceful will help lift our spirits and bring us renewed hope.

Today let me remember my strength, resources, and power. Help me move forward as I claim the life I want

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Determine that the thing can and shall be done, and then I we shall find the way.

~ Abraham Lincoln ~

It can be a common experience for those in recovery to experience times of dark thoughts, despair, hopelessness, or even suicidal feelings. If you have been depressed for a while or if such feelings have caused disruption in your life, it would be a good idea to consult a therapist. Some forms of depression benefit from prescribed anti-depressant medication and regular sessions with a therapist.

But if you find that you experience bouts of depression from time to time, it is important to be aware of this occurrence and to stay as active and engaged as you can. Even when you do not feel like going to a meeting, go. Even if you feel that you have nothing to give to anyone or anything else, volunteer. Even if you feel like you do not want to leave your house, get outside.

Partner such efforts with a reward system. Go to a meeting when you least feel like it, and then reward yourself with the opportunity to stay at home the following evening. By giving yourself an incentive, you may be more inclined to engage in an activity that will help ease your feelings of depression.

Today I will create a reward system to use whenever I feel depressed.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done.

~ Marie Curie ~

Here's a familiar scene: Several people have come to our homes ready to sit down to a turkey dinner with all the fixings. In the kitchen is a dirty oven, messy pots and pans, cluttered counters. Which do we think about—the wonderful dinner we have prepared for family and friends or the kitchen?

Many times we notice what has to be done, not what has already been done. When we first came into the program, we learned we had so much to do: detaching, admitting, accepting, working the Steps, working on ourselves. We may have felt overwhelmed at what needed to be done, but old-timers may have pointed out what we already had done—we came to the program to find help.

Tonight, are we thinking about tomorrow or a week from now? There are many things left for us to do. But for right now, we can look at what we have accomplished in our lives, our careers, our families. We have done so much, if we can only recognize it.

Tonight I can give myself credit for all the growth and gains. I have done well!

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Giving joy

We deserve to have beautiful things and need not continue disparaging and punishing ourselves for our past behavior. If someone wants to give us something, we can accept it! They have a right to the joy of giving, and we have a right to the joy of receiving.

We also have a right to the joy of giving so others may receive. We can give material things, we can give moral support, we can give a friendly ear, and, best of all, we can give love. These are the beautiful things. Have I learned to give?

Higher Power, help me to be able to give and to receive in a true and loving spirit

Today I will give something of value to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.

~ ELEANOR ROOSEVELT ~

Newcomer

Everybody in recovery seems to have his or her own prescription for enlightenment: a self-help book or therapist or meditation group, a guru or religious institution. People are always telling me what works for them. I've tried so many things that I'm starting to feel like a New Age cliché. Why can't I stick with something?

Sponsor

I can hear your hunger for spiritual connection. Once we've gone through the early stages of recovery, once survival is no longer the primary issue, many of us discover our capacity and desire for a spiritual path.

This is a spiritual program; that's why it works. It saves lives. Like you, I'm committed to working the program, coming to meetings, sharing, giving service, "practicing these principles" in everything I do. Without this program as my foundation, I wouldn't have much of a life today. But, for me, the program is a gateway to spiritual practice, not the practice itself.

Your exploration of various spiritual paths suggests that you're searching for a spiritual center. But why the constant darting from place to place that you've described? Perhaps you haven't found your "spiritual home" yet. Or perhaps sitting still and experiencing feelings as they arise may be frightening. Though facing these feelings may seem over-whelming, they won't destroy you.

All true spiritual paths lead within.

Today, I have the willingness to be still and go within.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

One of the first things we should endeavor to do is to kill the lawyer instinct in ourselves. In our effort to get the new guy straightened out we try to cure all his troubles by giving advice on subjects on which we possess neither the training nor ability to talk constructively.

Let us confine our efforts as far as possible to those things of which we have real knowledge — his sobriety and the AA Program.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Fear and Insecurity

Lord, continue to show me I don't have to fear people. When deep in my compulsions and obsessions, I was terrified of people, especially those who loved me. This new way of life has created a feeling of safety. My new friends, surroundings, and tools for living are lifesaving. Managing finances within a budget has produced far less stress. I pray for an attitude of financial responsibility in thought and action.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

BRAINS OR EXCELSIOR

You all know the Great Law. One way of stating it is to say: Like produces like. What we sow in thought we reap in experience.

People know that these things are true, and yet in spite of this transcendent knowledge they constantly use the Great Law for their own destruction. They would not dream of pouring water in the gas tank of their car, or sand into their watch, or broken glass into their food; but they do something just as foolish every time they think, speak, or act negatively. One cannot help wondering what such people have inside their heads—brains or excelsior.

In future, when you catch yourself thinking negatively, say to yourself severely, "Brains or excelsior?" and immediately switch to what you know to be the Truth of Being.

Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord . . . (Ephesians 6:8).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Whose Business?

It’s not enough to be busy The question is: What are we busy about?

~ Henry David Thoreau ~

When Jesus was young, his parents took him to Jerusalem. In the midst of their errands, they discovered that he had wandered off. After searching, they found him on the steps of the great temple, lecturing to learned men. When they asked Jesus why he had gone off on his own, he answered, “I am about my Father’s business. ”

Whose business are you about? Do you remember your purpose as a divine being, here to give and receive love, discover great truths, and celebrate life? Or, have you become so caught up in the busy-ness of every–day life that you have all but stifled the voice of peace that calls to you from deep within your heart?

My teacher Hilda gave a lecture in which she affirmed, “If you take care of God’s business, God will take care of yours.” After her program, someone asked me for a ride home to an area out of my way. At the time, there was a gas shortage, and only a few stations were open at night. Remembering Hilda’s lesson, I trusted Spirit to care for me, and I gave the fellow a ride. After dropping him off, I had just a little fuel, and I had to go onto a freeway on which there were no services. On the last corner be–fore the freeway, there was a gas station open at midnight?a practically unheard-of situation at that time!

Remember your purpose as a spiritual being, and all of your needs will be taken care of, sometimes in miraculous ways.

I pray to keep my priorities in order. My business is love.

I live from my heart and trust that all my needs will be met.

[bluidkiti]

November 6

Step by Step

“When we first come into AA, many of us are confused because, as a general rule, we’re at the end of our respective ropes, and we don’t know what to do. It’s like the fellow who came in AA and his sponsor said to him, ‘Listen, buddy, do you believe in a Higher Power?’ And the guy said, ‘Heck, yes, I been married to her for years!’ Yes, we find it rather confusing but, as we get around and get to know people in the group, they lead the way and all we have to do is to follow.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Lost Nearly All,” Ch 8 (“Desperation Drinking”), p 512.

Today, through the confusion of beginning recovery and even in sobriety, the answers are simply simple, and the simplest is “to follow.” We cannot nor should follow others in recovery for they, too, are in the same boat. Instead, all of us need to follow the Program and its 12 steps and traditions of ethics. Complications that arise are not from the program or traditions but from within; we make it as complicated, confusing or difficult as we allow it. Today, I will counter any confusion, complications or doubts with the simple motto, “Keep It Simple.” And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

BROKEN HEARTS

Time wasted in getting even can never be used in getting ahead.

~ Anonymous ~

Many of us, during the course of our lives, experience a number of broken relationships. Some of them are very painful and stay with us for years. We often feel we have been harmed and hold onto deep resentments about the rejection. After many days, months, sometimes years, we bury our broken heart and carry on with our lives.

Step Eight asks us to take another look at these relationships. We must dig up our broken heart and assume our responsibility for our part in the break. We come to discover that, whether we like it or not, we all have a part in the breakdown of a relationship. The way to help us heal a broken relationship is to make amends. As hard as it may be for us, we must make every effort except where we may harm someone. We must be honest, even if it means the amends are not returned.

Today I'll remember that relationships always have two sides. I will take responsibility for my part in broken ones, and make amends where I can to the best of my ability.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

That is the thankless position of the father in the family—the provider for all, and the enemy of all.

~ August Strindberg ~

Many of us feel like outsiders in our families. We sometimes feel like a paycheck and not much more to our loved ones. We grew up with absent fathers and we never learned how to live as fathers in the close circle of love at home.

How can we move from an outsider position—or even an enemy position—into a full partnership with our mates and families? We can begin by showing our real selves. We take the risk of telling them what we care about, what we love, and how we feel. We say what scares us, what breaks our hearts, and what our past was like. The greatest gift we can give is to open our feelings and let our loved ones know us.

These changes do not happen in a day or even a month. But gradually, with repeated expressions of ourselves, in the process of letting ourselves be known, we become loved for who we are, not only for what we can do.

Today I will tell someone in my family how I feel.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

There is an intuitive core at the depth of your being.

~ Helene Lerner-Robbins ~

Deep within ourselves, we know everything. We haven’t yet learned to tap this inner source of wisdom, but now that we have found this spiritual program, lessons will be forthcoming. This means that each of us is fully capable of understanding the best way to attain a serene life. Within our souls lie all questions and their answers. Our self- centeredness commonly blocks the information that’s trying to rise to our awareness. However, when we can keep our ego small, our humility large, we’ll understand clearly why we are here, what we need to know, what we have to do.

When we are frustrated, it’s hard to believe that we have the wisdom we need within us. We race from one meager option to another, finding no solution. But if we still the mind, the information we seek will bubble forth. Hard to believe? Not once we’ve tried it. Hard to remember? Not with enough practice.

I am wise. The knowledge I need today will rise to my mind’s eye.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to stay active

Before recovery, I'd get high whenever I felt bored. But now that I'm sober (and stable), drugs are no longer an option. It's especially hard these days when I feel edgy and restless, when I don't know what to do with myself.

The best answer I have right now is the Twelve Step fellowship. There, I'm not alone. I've heard others at my meeting say they've struggled with not knowing what to do with themselves or do with their time; many say they don't always know how to have fun. Through my program, I can stay in contact and stay active with safe, recovering people, as I slowly adjust to my new recovery lifestyle.

I will ask my fellow group members what they do with their time and how they have fun.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The first act of bad faith consists of evading what one cannot evade, of evading what one is.

~ Jean-Paul Sartre ~

When did we learn to pretend to be other than we were? When did we learn that what or who we were wasn’t good enough — that we could never do or say or be enough?

We learned in childhood, as did our parents, and their parents as well. Wearing a mask was a habit that evolved into becoming that mask, while our real selves disappeared.

In many ways, our real selves are still untested. But unlike the old days when they’d emerge only under pressure, we now try our real selves on like new clothes — first in a locked room when no one’s looking; later, in the open air and finally, with other people.

Being who we are is scary and awkward and strange at first, but it is an act of faith, one that builds upon the next act. These acts of faith are the process that is our recovery.

Today help me show my real face, if only for a moment.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.

~ Flora Whittemore ~

Imagine you have broken your arm. You can go to the hospital, get your arm x-rayed and casted, and, when it is healed, do the rehabilitation work necessary to restore function and strength. Or you can ignore your broken arm and try to function as best as you can using only one arm. The choice is yours.

Your life was broken before you came into recovery. Perhaps you ignored taking care of this breakage for a long time, working around it and all of the damage it was causing you and others. But eventually you came to the realization that being broken was no longer working. You chose to enter a program of recovery.

By choosing recovery, you are also choosing to put forth the effort to live with abstinence and to engage in different ways of acting, thinking, and behaving than you did in the past. Simply put, you cannot recover unless and until you have made both the decision to recover and the commitment to this decision. Recovery is a choice that needs to be nurtured on a daily basis. You do this by continually exercising your power to choose and your free will to make decisions that are right for you.

I want to recover. I choose to recover. I will recover.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Constant togetherness is fine—but only for Siamese twins.

~ Victoria Billings ~

Fusion in relationships can be self-destructive. Bonding so tightly with one person, with little time spent apart, is a perfect setup to addiction. When we become addicted to a person, we can be as desperate and suffering as an addict without a fix.

Growing up, we may have spent hours fantasizing about how wonderful relationships were. We may have placed so much hope in dreams of a perfect relationship that once we met someone, we unconsciously smothered the other person and ourselves in togetherness. We may have believed time spent apart meant our partner didn't love us or care to be with us.

Each flower in a garden has a separate set of roots, separate stems, leaves, and buds. Although the flowers may be the same variety, each is different in a subtle way. Similarly, we grow with our partner, like two separate flowers sharing the same garden. Our roots may intertwine and our leaves touch, yet we still grow and flourish separately from the other.

Tonight I can spend time flourishing on my own, relaxing for a peaceful night's sleep.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Welcoming new ideas

No group has a harness on the program or on our Higher Power’s will. Out of new assemblies emerge various thoughts on intervention and recovery. Provided that the program’s main purpose is not forgotten, new and creative endeavors can enlighten us.

If we are narrow-minded, we miss opportunities to help others and to progress spiritually. Book-thumpers, hardnosers, do-it-on- your-own-timers—all of us contribute. And those who need our particular brand of help will be brought to us by our Higher Power.

Am I receptive to new and different ways?

Higher Power, as you help me to keep an open heart, help me to keep an open mind.

Today I will look for new ideas by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Be not ashamed, to say what you are not ashamed to think.

~ MICHEL DE MONTAIGNE ~

Newcomer

I went to an Eleventh Step meeting last night. After the reading, someone shared that a fictional character from a movie had become her Higher Power! Doesn't that prove what nonsense this Higher Power stuff is?

Sponsor

I'm not at meetings to debate issues or shoot down my neighbor's concept of a Higher Power. I'm here to stay alive and in recovery, and to help others to do the same. When I'm practicing my own spiritual path with sincerity, I become less concerned about how others do it.

We don't have to define a Power greater than ourselves as anyone else defines it, but we do have to find and acknowledge what that Power is for each of us. For some, it's the source of life. For some, it's our capacity to take responsibility and make ethical decisions. For some, it's love—our feelings and acts of caring for ourselves and others.

When we hit bottom, some part of us finally gave up on the idea that we had to be our own Higher Power. Under-standing that remains essential if we're to live without addictive substances and behavior. Recovery gets side-tracked when we entertain the belief that our foundation is anything other than a Higher Power.

Today, I acknowledge my relationship with a Power greater than myself.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

According to St. John, God is Love. That appears to be the only description given and leads us to assume that it is His chief attribute. The fact that things are not always as we think they should be does not contradict it. Practically all our griefs we brought upon ourselves, many of them were essential in order to fully develop our characters, and many may be the result of God's long-range planning that we with our limited perception, cannot conceive.

If God had not loved the world, He would have given up on it a long time ago.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Instinctively Know

God, I pray the instincts that once compelled me toward addiction will continue to be redirected toward solving problems. By working the Steps, I have learned to face up to and solve the problems of everyday living that used to cause me to seek relief in my addiction. I trust I can handle situations with common sense and the help of my friends.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE KAFFIR DIDN'T KNOW

About the middle of the last century, a traveler was journeying along through what was then a remote part of South Africa. One day while smoking his pipe outside the hut in a native village, he noticed a group of little naked children playing what was evidently a native version of the time honored game of marbles. He watched the game idly for a while, and then something about the rough stones caught his attention. They were quite small pebbles, dull, but—here his pulse began to steeplechase. He spoke to the children's father, with studied carelessness, and the Kaffir said, "Oh yes, the children like these little stones. They have some more in the hut," and he brought forth a small basket containing several more.

Repressing his excitement, the traveler took out a large plug of tobacco, worth perhaps twenty or thirty cents in our money, and said, "I would like to take the stones home for my children. I will give you this tobacco for them. Are you willing?" The Kaffir laughed and said, "I am robbing you but if you insist, all right," and the bargain was sealed—which not only enriched the stranger but led in time to the great discovery of the South African diamond fields.

The fate of the Kaffir is really the fate of most human beings. Man holds a fabulous treasure in his possession—the power of the Spoken Word—and yet, in most cases, he does not know it.

The Lord shall open unto thee his good treasure . . . to bless all the work of thine hand . . . (Deuteronomy 28:12).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Give Me a Sign

Ask, and you shall receive. Seek, and you shall find. Knock, and it shall be opened unto you.

~ Jesus Christ ~

Marvin was confused about whether to leave his job in St. Louis and take a more lucrative position in Washington, D.C. After wrestling with the dilemma for a long time, he decided to turn the decision over to Spirit. “Just give me a sign!” Marvin prayed. Late that night when he went home, Marvin was stunned to find a “For Sale” sign on his lawn. “Well, there’s my sign,” he concluded.

The next morning when Marvin asked his wife about the sign, she did not know what he was talking about. Marvin took her out to show her, and the sign was gone. But as far as Marvin was concerned, the move was a done deal, he had his sign. He accepted the position, which proved to be very fulfilling.

Although all prayers for signs are not answered so dramatically, the universe will prompt us in a direction. A friend may utter a key phrase, we may notice a particular book on a coffee table, or we may see a symbol in a dream. In compassion, God is willing to point us in a direction if we ask sincerely and keep our antennae up for a signal.

Show me what I am to do for the highest good of all concerned.

I walk the way appointed by the hand of love.

[bluidkiti]

November 7

Step by Step

“The last …years of my life have been rich and meaningful. I have had my share of problems, heartaches and disappointments, because that is life, but also I have known a great deal of joy, and a peace that is the handmaiden of an inner freedom. I have a wealth of friends and, with my AA friends, an unusual quality of fellowship. For, to these people, I am truly related. First, through mutual pain and despair, and later through mutual objectives and new-found faith and hope. And, as the years go by, working together, sharing our experiences with one another, and also sharing a mutual trust, understanding and love – without strings, without obligation – we acquire relationships that are unique and priceless.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Alcoholics Anonymous Number Three,” Ch 12 (“The Keys of the Kingdom”), p 312.

Today, I will not forget my beginning in AA and the “mutual pain and despair” with other newcomers and, now, the “mutual objectives and new-found faith and hope” of recovery and sobriety. Whether I recognize it, this is progress. If the pain and despair when I arrived in AA have been replaced with faith and hope, I am moving forward. I cannot expect sobriety to spare me the “problems, heartaches and disappointments” that come with life, but I can expect to meet them sober – as long as I do what Program advises: one step and one day at a time. Today, if I can say my despair of my first days in the Program has been replaced with hope and faith, I can also say I’m moving where I need to move – forward. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris, M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SELF-APPROVAL

We can gain other people's approval if we do right and try hard but our own approval is worth a hundred times more.

~ Mark Twain ~

It is a plus factor in character growth if others like us, especially if they believe we are worth knowing. But unless we like who we really are, what we are doing and what we want to make of ourselves by our own efforts, we are in danger of making little progress in building our self-esteem.

We learn to be gentle with ourselves. We learn that not only do we forgive others but also we forgive ourselves. We develop an honest pride in how we have grown in our recovery program. We have learned in our Program that people-pleasing is a dead end. Those who, at times, feel that they are not really changing, should look in mirrors.

Learning to like myself is one of the most valuable lessons the Program teaches me. My life is mine and not based on other people's approval.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Truly, when the need is greatest, then God’s help is always nearest. Should we not willingly offer our hands and heart where help is still possible?

~ Theresa Gerhardinger ~

In the Twelfth Step of our recovery program, we tell our stories to others who need to hear that there is hope. As we live in our circle of recovering people, we can lose sight of the fact that more people still die of their addictions than recover. We never forget how dismal and futile life becomes in the grip of addiction and codependency, and how desperately we needed a way out. By the grace of God, help was there for us. Now we find meaning and spiritual growth by telling our stories of hope to others.

We still can slip into dark moods and self-pity. That is when we benefit most from reaching out, not so much to get help as to pass it on to those who need help. Sometimes the help we give is by inviting someone to come with us to a meeting. Other times we can give help by mentoring a young child, donating food to hungry people, visiting old people who are lonely, or volunteering at our community celebration.

Today I will look for ways to reach out to others in need.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Learning and maturation in the life of the spirit: cannot be hurried, and as in physical and intellectual development, a great deal depends on our readiness.

~ Mary McDermott Shideler ~

We are ready for a spiritually directed life. It took us many stress-filled years to get here, and a number of us survived harrowing experiences during the journey. Even when we didn’t understand our search, we wanted security and knowledge of how to live. But we didn’t know we were on this path.

Now that we’re here, some of us expect to know joy, serenity, and security in a flash. For a very few, a profound spiritual experience happens quickly. But most of us have to wait and work on our willingness and readiness to follow the path that leads to God.

How do we become willing? The Steps will guide our actions and our thoughts, and make us ready to receive the blessings we seek

God will recognize my desire for peace by the way I act today. I will have peace if I treat others peacefully.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am understood and cared for

I have a dual disorder. My parents don't much understand my illnesses. In fact, it feels as though they blame me for them sometimes.

This is why I am grateful for my recovering friends in both my Step group and support group. They help keep me sober and stable. And through them I am coming to accept the fact that these illnesses are not my fault—and not understood by many people. I trust that if I stick with my recovery plan, I will continue to get better and get out on my own again. I have a higher power who is helping me see to that.

Today I will meditate on my gratitude for all the caring people in my life.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Freedom is not safety, but opportunity.

~ Zechariah Chafee, Jr. ~

In early recovery, some of us heave a sigh of relief thinking the work is over at last, that now we can sit back and take it easy. We may think things will come easily to us now that we’ve done so much hard work.

Then we find ourselves surprised when life goes on around us at its usual hectic pace. Things keep popping up, and not always things we like. At this point, some of us give up. We want life to be safe and calm. We feel we’re entitled to sunny days after so much rain.

But we can’t stop the process of change. Instead, we can view change as an opportunity for growth. Every new situation offers us a challenge, and every challenge offers us the chance to strengthen our recovery muscles a little more. When we feel fearful and timid we can teach ourselves to be assertive. When we’re exhausted we can learn to care for our bodies so they can carry us in the days ahead. When our lives are too filled with stress we can leam ways to reduce our load and relax. When we face life this way, we become excited about change. Now we’re finding even more peace and serenity as we meet each new challenge with a joyful heart.

Today help me to accept change as part of the challenge of recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure.

~ Don Wilder and Bill Rechin ~

Not everyone is blessed with artistic creativity, an athletic ability, or savvy business sense. But when you tell people that you cannot draw, sing, throw a discus, or cook, such things are simply not true.

You can draw something, even if the image is scribbling. You can sing, even if it is off-key. You can try to throw a discus, even if it does not go very far. And you can cook something, even if it is as simple as boiling water for pasta. Saying “I cannot do this" whenever you face a task or opportunity that comes your way releases you from taking responsibility.

Today resolve to make no excuses. Whenever you face something hard or seemingly insurmountable, say, “I will try.” Whenever you think you cannot make it through the day without a drink, say, “I will not drink at this moment.” Whenever you need to make amends to someone you have harmed, do not give excuses for why you did something. Simply say you are sorry. The life you create for yourself is one that will either be dictated by your excuses, or freed from the constraints excuses provide.

Today I will create a way of life in which I make no excuses.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

And if you but listen in the stillness of the night you shall hear. . . . It is Thy urge in us that would turn our nights, which are Thine, into days, which are Thine also.

~ Kahlil Gibran ~

How much would we benefit from the program if we went to meetings with cotton stuffed in our ears? We could use the Steps and read the literature, but how would we learn from others about the strength, hope, and experience of the program?

Listen and Learn may be one of the hardest slogans for us to follow. Many times we come to meetings ready to dump our problems on the group. Sometimes we sit in judgment of those around us. Each of us, no matter what our background or age, shares a commonality. Each of us has something important to share, whether the words be delivered eloquently or with humor, sadness, or simplicity.

We can pause before we speak to listen to others. By opening our ears, we are opening our minds to learn about ourselves through the words of others.

Can I listen to those around me? What can I learn that might help me?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Pleasing ourselves

Many of our character defects stem from a motive to be acceptable on a social level. We worry about our popularity, our career prospects, our financial future, our reputation, and so on. By trying to please others, we exaggerate our real capabilities and may even lie to impress people.

We sometimes agree to do favors for others when we really can’t or when we don’t even want to. We become resentful. Others resent us or find us unreliable for not living up to our promises. We’re not here to please people for the sake of pleasing people. We’re here to please our Higher Power. Just know-ing this causes many of our character defects to fade.

Do I know it’s not necessary to please everybody all the time?

Higher Power, show me how to please you and me and how to stop worrying about pleasing others.

I will try to please my self today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

You have to believe in happiness.

~ DOUGLAS MALLOCH ~

Newcomer

You've been encouraging me to take the risk of trying new things and thinking about what my personal goals are. I'm confused. If I pray only for knowledge of my Higher Power's will for me, aren't I negating myself? Does being sober mean I can't have any desires or goals of my own?

Sponsor

We know what our lives were like in active addiction; we know what they are in recovery. Something in us can see clearly that the real life, the one we're meant to have, the one our souls desire, depends on staying away from addictive substances and behaviors. Why imagine that the Source of Life wants us to have anything but full recovery, anything less than the ability to make our own sober choices? Would Eternal Truth require us to behave like puppets? Would a Creator want us to stifle the creativity within us?

Our relationship with a Power greater than ourselves includes listening to our own hearts. Underneath fear, underneath shame, underneath rebellion, underneath self- rejection, there is wholeness, joy, and the desire to live. It's here that we find our true purpose and the way to fulfill it.

Today, I trust the voice of health, sanity, and self-love that is growing more articulate within me.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Every one of us alcoholics arrived at the point where we felt that all was lost. If we had not felt this way we would never have confessed that our lives were unmanageable. It was a stupendous admission for us and would never have happened except for the desperation that engulfed us.

Our lives had been totally wrecked, it is true, yet God has never yet failed to give man a second chance. Don't muff it.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

God Is Doing for Us

Dear God, as I practice patience, belief, and trust in surrendering to Your will for me, I now trust that solutions and miracles come in Your time, not mine. This Promise tells me I must accept Your help, not merely be resigned to it. I pray I will let go of my problems and turn them over to You with faith.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE SECRET OF SUCCESSFUL SALESMANSHIP

True salesmanship means finding out what your customer really needs, and supplying him with it; or if you cannot furnish it yourself, advising him to go elsewhere. Such a policy will not mean loss of business. On the contrary, working in this way you may lose one order but you will get half a dozen in its place—and you will have peace of mind. Any one particular sale does not matter; it is the annual turnover that counts.

The policy, the Golden Rule, was taught by Jesus, the wisest and most practical teacher who ever lived. Salesman treat your customer exactly as you would like him to treat you if the positions were reversed. Tell him exactly what you would like to be told about the merchandise, if you were the purchaser; and if you will do this the whole universe will cooperate to make your business career an outstanding success.

Teach me to do thy will, for thou art my God: thy spirit is good . . . (Psalm 143:10).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

You Get Paid for This?

Find out what you like doing best, and get someone to pay you for doing it.

~ Katherine Whitehorn ~

As I paged through Frank Levinson’s Adventures on Horseback guest book, I occasionally glanced out the picture window from his ranch, overlooking meadows, palm trees, and ocean panorama. Amid the many enthusiastic comments, one caught my eye: “And you get paid for this? I’m sending you my resume!” The writer was referring to the fact that Frank is living his dream and being supported for it. Frank has taken what many people consider vacation, and turned it into vocation.

Here are some points to consider when trying to assess whether or not you are in your right job: You know you are in your right place if you feel you should be paying people to let you do what they are already paying you to do. And you know you are in your wrong place if you are laboring in a position that is made worthwhile only by the money.

Some other good diagnostic questions for right livelihood are: Do you get up in the morning with a sense of enthusiasm, looking forward to what is before you? Do you feel creative and inspired to expand? Do you have more energy at the end of your work session than when you began? Do people thank you for making their life easier or more beautiful? Do you feel that Spirit is working through you to deliver results that you could not have manifested on your own? Would you want your child to create a profession with the attitude you hold toward yours?

You deserve to be paid for doing what you love. You deserve to be up–lifted by what you do. You deserve to live your personal destiny through your vocation. Don’t waste any more time in an unfulfilling job; begin now to create the life your heart yearns to live. Someday someone will write in your guest book, “And you get paid for this?”

Help me to find peace and fulfillment in my work.

I am richly rewarded for following my dreams.

[bluidkiti]

November 8

Step by Step

“We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
‘We alcoholics are men and women who have lost the ability to control our drinking. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals – usually brief – were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our types are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period we get worse, never better.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 3 (“More About Alcoholism”), p 30.

Today, the first step in recovery is to concede that I am an alcoholic, that I can no longer drink responsibly – if I ever did – and that I will only get sicker and never better if I continue to drink. Disease, dis-ease, illness, condition or anything else, the word alcoholic is nothing more than a word. But if for whatever reason I cannot accept or even say it, I can say simply that I cannot drink and work toward a goal – sober alcoholic. As a sober alcoholic, I have the freedom to say I do not need and do not want to drink and to say that I am simply a person who does not drink. Today, I will start to live in the solution of sobriety and not in the problem of alcoholism. But I first must acknowledge that I simply cannot drink. Today, I cannot drink – it’s that simple. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EXPECTATIONS

For people who live on expectations, to face up to their realization is something of an ordeal

~ Elizabeth Bowen ~

We used to undermine our happiness with unrealistic expectations. We said we wanted to be happy, but our actions told a different story. We held onto resentments and grudges, because we expected life to be fair. We expected those around us to understand our needs with no effort on our part. We expected to be given all the good things in life simply because we thought we deserved to have them handed to us.

Our Program teaches us to let go of expectations. We learn to face reality. We realize that life is not handed to us on a silver platter. We come to appreciate reality. We need to make fewer unrealistic demands on ourselves, others, and life in general.

When I live on expectations, lam not living in the real world. I need to tone down my demands and appreciate the life I am living right now.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Other things may change us, hut we start and end with family.

~ Anthony Brandt ~

In our childhoods, our families formed our self-image and our understanding of what relationships are. We learned to either have trust in the system of intimacy that nurtured us, or to distrust the fibers of those close bonds. For some of us it is easier to trust relationships that aren’t close than to feel trust after they become close. Many of us become more fearful and anxious with someone after we are deeply involved with them because we were formed in childhood to feel wary.

As adults, we are still developing and changing. No one reaches adulthood fully formed. Some of us have been stuck in our childhood state. But we are not limited to what we learned as children if we are willing to be challenged to grow in adult love. We have to give ourselves some slack when we make mistakes; there is always room for repair. And we have to grant the same to our loved ones. When we are willing to be honest about our feelings and willing to hear what our loved ones are telling us, we will continue to become better men.

Today I continue my adult development to become a better man.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Because thoughts come from the inside, not from the outside, what we think determines what we see.

~ Jane Nelsen ~

It’s difficult to remember that we are in charge of our thoughts and thus what we experience. But it’s also exciting to contemplate all the changes we can make by focusing on positive thoughts.

Perhaps we can try this together. Put this book aside for a moment and look closely at your surroundings. Think about how lucky you are to have a place to sit, a peaceful moment to contemplate your life. Think grateful thoughts about your friends and family. Notice how you feel when you have pleasant thoughts running through your mind.

Our lives are as fruitful, hopeful, and peaceful as we choose. The show that goes on in our minds and is acted out in our experiences has been produced and directed by us.

I am eager to experience my life today. Knowing that it will match my thoughts is exhilarating.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am not to blame for my two illnesses

What did I do to deserve the dual disorder of addiction and psychiatric illness? Why must I have both illnesses—isn't one enough? Sometimes I feel punished, as though I'd committed some crime.

I brought this up at my support group and was reminded that I don't deserve my illnesses, didn't cause them, and cannot cure them. The group called them no-fault illnesses and emphasized the importance of acceptance. It was a relief to hear that, although I am responsible for working on both illnesses as best I can, I am not a bad person for having a dual disorder.

I will read about Step One and pray for acceptance and strength.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.

~ Joseph F. Newton ~

The isolation of our illness can be devastating. And the more advanced we were in our disease, the more isolated we became. The journey back is a hard one, but to wake up in the morning and face the world with friends is a joyous triumph. We reach out to others like us and realize we are not alone in our suffering.

The pain of our illness made us feel separate from others — as if we belonged to an entirely different race of people. We wondered how anyone else could feel the way we did. The fact is, we belong to a special group with special advantages: we know the symptoms of our illness and know what we can expect from our recovery. We can talk about our feelings with people who understand what we are feeling and why we are feeling that way And we have a way out of our pain and suffering — the Twelve Steps.

We need never again feel isolated from others. Our group and the strength we’ve found from people just like us will be the bridge to our future happiness.

Today help me know when I am isolating and give me the strength to connect with others.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Mirth is like a flash of lightning that breaks through gloom of clouds, and glitters for a moment; cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind, and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.

~ Joseph Addison ~

You may recall the first few meetings you attended, when you were filled with misery and in deep despair, and heard laughter and joking by others at the meeting. You may have felt put off by such behavior and thought, “How can people laugh at a time like this? How can getting sober be even remotely funny?”

While alcoholism is truly a serious disease that, if left untreated, can have critical or even deadly outcomes, sobriety shows you a way of life that includes creating a balance between work and play. Recovery enables you to see the full spectrum of emotions—one that includes smiles as well as tears. Sobriety shows you that it is possible to have a good time without drugs or alcohol.

Once you work the program, it may not be long before you can join into the laughter, joke around with others, and learn how to play and have good, clean fun. By entering the program, you have earned the right to laugh.

Humor is an essential part of life that helps me stay sane and sober.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I had the blues because I had no shoes, until upon the street I met a man who had no feet.

~ Harold Abbott ~

A young man traveled to the city to apply for jobs. But first he wanted to buy new shoes to assure a good impression. He was so intent on getting to a shoe store that he nearly tripped over another man. This man had no legs and was sitting on a board with wheels, pushing his way along the sidewalk when the two had bumped. But the accident in no way slowed down the disabled man; he waved a cheery greeting to the young man and traveled on.

How often are we so caught up in petty trifles that we don't notice others? The young man so concerned with shoes and a future job learned some people don't have to worry about shoes.

What did we notice today? If we think back to to-day's events, can we remember little details about people, recall smiles and laughter, or recollect snatches of conversation? We can take time to notice more than our shoes.

Sometimes I pay too much attention to my own issues. Help me notice other people and remember the time I spend with them.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Dropping our delusions

While using mind-altering chemicals, we often operated under delusions of grandeur. We thought we didn’t have to take anything from anybody. We were confident we could handle everything. But if we remember correctly, when the landlady said, “Get out,” we got out. When the police said, “Get in,” we got in.

Actually, we were pushed around a lot. By letting go of false pride, we clear the way for real confidence.

Have I left my delusions behind?

Higher Power, I am grateful for the freedom that comes with not having to be devious.

I will cultivate humility today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Someone once asked me... whether I waited for inspiration. My answer was: "Every day!"

~ AARON COPLAND ~

Newcomer

I've been praying for help in an area that is very difficult for me; I feel as if I've hit a wall, and I don't know what to do. The prayers don't seem to be helping. Is my Higher Power listening?

Sponsor

Our reserves of patience are so easily exhausted. We quickly move to discouragement and even despair when we don't get what we want when we want it. Problems may have been in our lives for years, but we are only now becoming aware of them in recovery. How can we expect them to clear up in a few weeks or months? We think that we're at the end of our rope, but perhaps our situation will seem less desperate if we acknowledge that, through prayer, we've made a beginning.

Think of how patient our Higher Power was with us, all those years that we continued to be active in our addictions. Can we be that patient with ourselves, as we make progress in recovery?

Instead of giving up, we can believe an answer will come, and can prepare to recognize it by keeping our lines of communication with our Higher Power open.

Today, my daily prayers are part of an ongoing conversation with my Higher Power. I pray with confidence that I am in the process of receiving what I need.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is a most comfortable feeling for us alcoholics to know that there is a vast host of friends in AA who are standing by. We pray to God we will never need them for an emergency and, with our new-found faith, we don't think we ever will, but it helps a lot to know that they are available if needed. It gives you a feeling of security akin to catching the fourth ace.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Happy Thoughts

Lord, remind me that the past is just that.
Protect me from my own thoughts.
Take away the old tapes playing in my head.
Fill my mind with thoughts of peace and serenity.
Lead me into the light, away from darkness.
Surround me with Your love.
God, remind me that yesterday is gone;
Tomorrow may never be;
Today is all I have.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE TWO SPIRATIONS

Have you heard the old story of the two spirations? They are essential for every worthwhile achievement. If either is missing the enterprise is doomed to failure, and if you have not been making your life as successful as you would like, you must go to work and find which of them has been overlooked. I am sure it is hardly necessary to tell you that the two spirations in question are inspiration and perspiration.

First you need inspiration. Sheer hard work, blind plodding, or brutal hammering will not bring Success. You must also have regular inspiration.

Second, perspiration. There is no success without persevering hard work in the direction of your goal. Recently I heard one of the greatest living musicians address a class of musical students. He said, "I know of no road to success except hard work. If there is such a road I have not heard of it."

I added in my own thought, "Work hard—but do not make hard work of it."

Contact God daily for inspiration; and then work hard.

Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it; except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain (Psalm 127:1).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

It Takes Two

You are your brother’s savior.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

When she performed weddings, my teacher Hilda gave one marriage vow: “Don’t fight on the same day.” She suggested, “You can be mad on Monday, and then your turn is on Tuesday. As long as at least one of you keeps your head at any given time, you will be all right. ”

When I first heard Hilda’s advice, I laughed and thought her idea was a cute joke. As I went on to explore my own relationships, I realized that her suggestion was profound and had the potential to save much pain. A Course in Miracles echoes that relationships are safe as long as one per–son remains sane at any moment.

Anger, upset, and blame are forms of temporary insanity. When two people lose their clarity simultaneously, the issue to which the insanity is applied seems real. If one person can hold his or her awareness of the light, while the other has slipped in the darkness, the light-holder will have the leverage to lift the other out. Two people in the dark have a much harder time finding the light.

If your partner goes insane momentarily, hold your peace. Your upset will pass much more quickly if you do not agree to match it or fight it. Once my partner was quite upset, and she vented for about half an hour. I simply remained still and listened. Finally, she relaxed and said, “Thank you for listening—that is just what I needed.”

If you temporarily lose your sanity, do not try to drag your partner to the netherworld with you. If they can keep their peace, do not be offended; you are blessed. Clarity is the greatest gift we can offer one another.

I pray to remain sane when others lose their clarity, and that they do the same for me.

Peace is my most powerful response.

[bluidkiti]

November 9

Step by Step

” …Are some of us just as biased and unreasonable about the realm of the spirit as were the ancients about the realm of the material? Even in the present century (20th), American newspapers were afraid to print an account of the Wright brothers’ first successful flight at Kitty Hawk. Had not all efforts at flight failed before? Did not Professor Langley’s flying machine go to the bottom of the Potomac River? Was it not true that the best mathematical minds had proved man could never fly? Had not people said God had reserved this privilege to the birds? Only 30 years later, the conquest of the air was almost an old story and airplane travel was in full swing.
‘…We had to ask ourselves why we shouldn’t apply to our human problems (a) readiness to change our point of view.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 4 (“We Agnostics”), pp 51-2.

Today, by simply changing my point of view if I still reject the possibility of a Higher Power, I am poised to take the Second Step: “Came to believe that a Power greater than (my)self could restore (me) to sanity.” But why is belief and acceptance of a higher power helpful, if not required, for me to earn sobriety? A power greater than ourselves, simply, can strengthen us to do what we cannot do alone – stop drinking. That force might be able to achieve what once impossible for me alone – stop drinking. Men of any era deemed impossible accomplishments that, in subsequent eras, are taken for granted. If today I can open myself to a power stronger than myself, if I can ignore any religious implications, I can take an early but pivotal step toward recovery. I can “come to believe.” And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EXPECTATIONS

For people who live on expectations, to face up to their realization is something of an ordeal

~ Elizabeth Bowen ~

We used to undermine our happiness with unrealistic expectations. We said we wanted to be happy, but our actions told a different story. We held onto resentments and grudges, because we expected life to be fair. We expected those around us to understand our needs with no effort on our part. We expected to be given all the good things in life simply because we thought we deserved to have them handed to us.

Our Program teaches us to let go of expectations. We learn to face reality. We realize that life is not handed to us on a silver platter. We come to appreciate reality. We need to make fewer unrealistic demands on ourselves, others, and life in general.

When I live on expectations, lam not living in the real world. I need to tone down my demands and appreciate the life I am living right now.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Other things may change us, hut we start and end with family.

~ Anthony Brandt ~

In our childhoods, our families formed our self-image and our understanding of what relationships are. We learned to either have trust in the system of intimacy that nurtured us, or to distrust the fibers of those close bonds. For some of us it is easier to trust relationships that aren’t close than to feel trust after they become close. Many of us become more fearful and anxious with someone after we are deeply involved with them because we were formed in childhood to feel wary.

As adults, we are still developing and changing. No one reaches adulthood fully formed. Some of us have been stuck in our childhood state. But we are not limited to what we learned as children if we are willing to be challenged to grow in adult love. We have to give ourselves some slack when we make mistakes; there is always room for repair. And we have to grant the same to our loved ones. When we are willing to be honest about our feelings and willing to hear what our loved ones are telling us, we will continue to become better men.

Today I continue my adult development to become a better man.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Because thoughts come from the inside, not from the outside, what we think determines what we see.

~ Jane Nelsen ~

It’s difficult to remember that we are in charge of our thoughts and thus what we experience. But it’s also exciting to contemplate all the changes we can make by focusing on positive thoughts.

Perhaps we can try this together. Put this book aside for a moment and look closely at your surroundings. Think about how lucky you are to have a place to sit, a peaceful moment to contemplate your life. Think grateful thoughts about your friends and family. Notice how you feel when you have pleasant thoughts running through your mind.

Our lives are as fruitful, hopeful, and peaceful as we choose. The show that goes on in our minds and is acted out in our experiences has been produced and directed by us.

I am eager to experience my life today. Knowing that it will match my thoughts is exhilarating.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am not to blame for my two illnesses

What did I do to deserve the dual disorder of addiction and psychiatric illness? Why must I have both illnesses—isn't one enough? Sometimes I feel punished, as though I'd committed some crime.

I brought this up at my support group and was reminded that I don't deserve my illnesses, didn't cause them, and cannot cure them. The group called them no-fault illnesses and emphasized the importance of acceptance. It was a relief to hear that, although I am responsible for working on both illnesses as best I can, I am not a bad person for having a dual disorder.

I will read about Step One and pray for acceptance and strength.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.

~ Joseph F. Newton ~

The isolation of our illness can be devastating. And the more advanced we were in our disease, the more isolated we became. The journey back is a hard one, but to wake up in the morning and face the world with friends is a joyous triumph. We reach out to others like us and realize we are not alone in our suffering.

The pain of our illness made us feel separate from others — as if we belonged to an entirely different race of people. We wondered how anyone else could feel the way we did. The fact is, we belong to a special group with special advantages: we know the symptoms of our illness and know what we can expect from our recovery. We can talk about our feelings with people who understand what we are feeling and why we are feeling that way And we have a way out of our pain and suffering — the Twelve Steps.

We need never again feel isolated from others. Our group and the strength we’ve found from people just like us will be the bridge to our future happiness.

Today help me know when I am isolating and give me the strength to connect with others.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Mirth is like a flash of lightning that breaks through gloom of clouds, and glitters for a moment; cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind, and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.

~ Joseph Addison ~

You may recall the first few meetings you attended, when you were filled with misery and in deep despair, and heard laughter and joking by others at the meeting. You may have felt put off by such behavior and thought, “How can people laugh at a time like this? How can getting sober be even remotely funny?”

While alcoholism is truly a serious disease that, if left untreated, can have critical or even deadly outcomes, sobriety shows you a way of life that includes creating a balance between work and play. Recovery enables you to see the full spectrum of emotions—one that includes smiles as well as tears. Sobriety shows you that it is possible to have a good time without drugs or alcohol.

Once you work the program, it may not be long before you can join into the laughter, joke around with others, and learn how to play and have good, clean fun. By entering the program, you have earned the right to laugh.

Humor is an essential part of life that helps me stay sane and sober.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I had the blues because I had no shoes, until upon the street I met a man who had no feet.

~ Harold Abbott ~

A young man traveled to the city to apply for jobs. But first he wanted to buy new shoes to assure a good impression. He was so intent on getting to a shoe store that he nearly tripped over another man. This man had no legs and was sitting on a board with wheels, pushing his way along the sidewalk when the two had bumped. But the accident in no way slowed down the disabled man; he waved a cheery greeting to the young man and traveled on.

How often are we so caught up in petty trifles that we don't notice others? The young man so concerned with shoes and a future job learned some people don't have to worry about shoes.

What did we notice today? If we think back to to-day's events, can we remember little details about people, recall smiles and laughter, or recollect snatches of conversation? We can take time to notice more than our shoes.

Sometimes I pay too much attention to my own issues. Help me notice other people and remember the time I spend with them.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Dropping our delusions

While using mind-altering chemicals, we often operated under delusions of grandeur. We thought we didn’t have to take anything from anybody. We were confident we could handle everything. But if we remember correctly, when the landlady said, “Get out,” we got out. When the police said, “Get in,” we got in.

Actually, we were pushed around a lot. By letting go of false pride, we clear the way for real confidence.

Have I left my delusions behind?

Higher Power, I am grateful for the freedom that comes with not having to be devious.

I will cultivate humility today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Someone once asked me... whether I waited for inspiration. My answer was: "Every day!"

~ AARON COPLAND ~

Newcomer

I've been praying for help in an area that is very difficult for me; I feel as if I've hit a wall, and I don't know what to do. The prayers don't seem to be helping. Is my Higher Power listening?

Sponsor

Our reserves of patience are so easily exhausted. We quickly move to discouragement and even despair when we don't get what we want when we want it. Problems may have been in our lives for years, but we are only now becoming aware of them in recovery. How can we expect them to clear up in a few weeks or months? We think that we're at the end of our rope, but perhaps our situation will seem less desperate if we acknowledge that, through prayer, we've made a beginning.

Think of how patient our Higher Power was with us, all those years that we continued to be active in our addictions. Can we be that patient with ourselves, as we make progress in recovery?

Instead of giving up, we can believe an answer will come, and can prepare to recognize it by keeping our lines of communication with our Higher Power open.

Today, my daily prayers are part of an ongoing conversation with my Higher Power. I pray with confidence that I am in the process of receiving what I need.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is a most comfortable feeling for us alcoholics to know that there is a vast host of friends in AA who are standing by. We pray to God we will never need them for an emergency and, with our new-found faith, we don't think we ever will, but it helps a lot to know that they are available if needed. It gives you a feeling of security akin to catching the fourth ace.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Happy Thoughts

Lord, remind me that the past is just that.
Protect me from my own thoughts.
Take away the old tapes playing in my head.
Fill my mind with thoughts of peace and serenity.
Lead me into the light, away from darkness.
Surround me with Your love.
God, remind me that yesterday is gone;
Tomorrow may never be;
Today is all I have.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE TWO SPIRATIONS

Have you heard the old story of the two spirations? They are essential for every worthwhile achievement. If either is missing the enterprise is doomed to failure, and if you have not been making your life as successful as you would like, you must go to work and find which of them has been overlooked. I am sure it is hardly necessary to tell you that the two spirations in question are inspiration and perspiration.

First you need inspiration. Sheer hard work, blind plodding, or brutal hammering will not bring Success. You must also have regular inspiration.

Second, perspiration. There is no success without persevering hard work in the direction of your goal. Recently I heard one of the greatest living musicians address a class of musical students. He said, "I know of no road to success except hard work. If there is such a road I have not heard of it."

I added in my own thought, "Work hard—but do not make hard work of it."

Contact God daily for inspiration; and then work hard.

Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it; except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain (Psalm 127:1).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

It Takes Two

You are your brother’s savior.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

When she performed weddings, my teacher Hilda gave one marriage vow: “Don’t fight on the same day.” She suggested, “You can be mad on Monday, and then your turn is on Tuesday. As long as at least one of you keeps your head at any given time, you will be all right. ”

When I first heard Hilda’s advice, I laughed and thought her idea was a cute joke. As I went on to explore my own relationships, I realized that her suggestion was profound and had the potential to save much pain. A Course in Miracles echoes that relationships are safe as long as one per–son remains sane at any moment.

Anger, upset, and blame are forms of temporary insanity. When two people lose their clarity simultaneously, the issue to which the insanity is applied seems real. If one person can hold his or her awareness of the light, while the other has slipped in the darkness, the light-holder will have the leverage to lift the other out. Two people in the dark have a much harder time finding the light.

If your partner goes insane momentarily, hold your peace. Your upset will pass much more quickly if you do not agree to match it or fight it. Once my partner was quite upset, and she vented for about half an hour. I simply remained still and listened. Finally, she relaxed and said, “Thank you for listening—that is just what I needed.”

If you temporarily lose your sanity, do not try to drag your partner to the netherworld with you. If they can keep their peace, do not be offended; you are blessed. Clarity is the greatest gift we can offer one another.

I pray to remain sane when others lose their clarity, and that they do the same for me.

Peace is my most powerful response.

[bluidkiti]

November 10

Step by Step

“Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. …Their chances are less than average.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 5 (“How It Works”), p 58.

Today, if enough is enough, if despair cuts too deeply, if fear gained the upper hand, if my lies are so many that I can’t lie to even myself anymore, I seek the strength to take control and say no more to all of it and, especially, commit myself not to be one of those who are “constitutionally incapable.” Whether I am struggling not to drink but the bottle is winning or if I am giving temptation or craving the upper hand, today enough is enough and I muster the brutal honesty needed to avoid being one of the “constitutionally incapable’s.” If I allow dishonesty to be the way of my life, I have little chance of taking back control of my life and getting sober. I will not fall deeper into the gutter, nor will I keep lying to myself and anyone else simply because it has become a habit – even when telling the truth is easier. Today, I begin the work to become “constitutionally capable.” Honesty is the starting gate. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

MIRACLES

The age of miracles is forever here.

~ Thomas Carlyle ~

So many wonderful, unexpected things happen to us in recovery. We are convinced early in the Program that miracles can happen to all who work toward spiritual progress. The fact that we found our way to the Program is itself a miracle. That we have learned how to stay abstinent is another. That we are living a new and better life is still another.

With the help of our friends, our Program, and our Higher Power, we experience miracles of discovery and growth all the time. As long as we face each day with honesty and gratitude, those miracles will continue to be ours.

It is said that the greatest miracle would be to return from the dead. Before recovery began, we were among the living dead. Today we are all miracles.

Today and every day, I will remember to thank my Higher Power for the miracles I've found in recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Patience and passage of time do more than strength and jury.

~ Jean de la Fontaine ~

It’s part of our masculine style: when we see a problem, we want to get out our tool kit and fix it. We admire strength and the ability to remedy any problem. That’s not always bad, but as we get older and wiser we learn that not everything can be fixed with a hammer.

Masculine strength and aggressiveness don’t solve all problems. A savvy man who has been around the block a few times learns other approaches to problems. We learn that patience and timing are incredible forces for accomplishing great things. As we continue to focus on our own recovery and transformation, sometimes we feel impatient for the rewards and the peace of mind that are promised in this program. The best remedy for impatience is to turn our attention back to the challenges and the rewards that this particular day brings. They are sufficient for us to deal with.

Today I will remember that time is my friend and is working on my side.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Don’t just want. Choose.

~ Patricia Benson ~

For many of us the fog is only beginning to clear. It takes awhile to understand that all along life has been about making choices. Because we were under the influence, we inadvertently rolled into many situations with unclear intentions. Not being conscious of our choices, however, doesn’t absolve us of the responsibility for making them. Now we have the opportunity, with the help of the program, to take charge of our choices. We can, with thought, make responsible choices.

We are assured the gift of empowerment when we actively take charge of our choices. We used to want things to work out without doing our part or asking for what we needed. Or we never consciously made choices. What has become so very clear is that not choosing is in fact choosing! And, no doubt, we are still saddled with the results of some of the “choices” we never intended to make. No longer does this need to be our life pattern. Today is a new day, and this program is giving us every tool we need to embark on a new course.

I will grow in confidence the more I consciously choose among my many options today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to stay sober and stable

At first I thought that if I just took my psychiatric medication, I would be OK. I thought that if my mood got brighter and I didn't feel so restless so much of the time, I wouldn't have to drink.

But when my symptoms improved, I got a surprise—I found out I still wanted to use. I couldn't stop cold turkey, I needed to use. And my symptoms got worse after using. It's taken some time and some trial and error, but I now see that I must work on both illnesses at the same time.

I will need a Twelve Step program to deal with my substance abuse.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

They who forgive most shall be most forgiven.

~ P.J. Bailey ~

We come into the program with many resentments: “It was his fault I drank in the first place”; “If I’d gotten that job this never would have happened”; “I’m coming here to make my wife happy.” We are angry and we need to blame someone for our pain. And the hardest thing is to accept responsibility for our actions, to say, “I am here because of me.”

But now we are here, ready to change. We soon learn that resentments are a danger that could lead us to relapse. And resentment hurts our self-love. To keep harboring resentments will hinder our recovery.

So we take an inventory and share it with someone we trust, and begin to understand the self- defeating nature of resentments. We are slowly beginning to feel and express our anger. It can be freeing to realize that whether or not we confront the target of our anger makes no difference. We learn that resentments poison us and we don’t want to let them keep us from our Higher Power. In time, with help from our Twelve Step fellowship, we learn how to forgive and find peace in ourselves.

Today help me take one step closer to forgiveness.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Try out your ideas by visualizing them in action.

~ David Seabury ~

Meditation can calm and relax you during times of stress, and can help you face some of the most difficult tasks in your life. Whether these are things you need to do as part of your daily routine or as part of your work in recovery, spending quiet time in reflection before you take action can help redirect your efforts and improve your outlook so you can be assured of a successful outcome.

To do so, get into a comfortable space—one that is quiet and free from stress or outside interruptions. Lie down or sit in a comfortable position. You can use soothing music or silence to help you relax as you take slow, deep breaths. When you feel yourself relaxed and in a calm state of mind, consider the task that lies before you. Ask, “What do I hope to accomplish by taking this action?” Focus your mind and visualize having achieved your goal. Feel all of your feelings: a great sense of accomplishment, relief, happiness, or pride.

You may now be ready and eager to forge ahead. Meditation has helped you develop a positive mind-set so you can take the necessary actions to bring about the results you desire.

I will use meditation to help me take positive action.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Life consists of opposites in balance.

~ Marian Zimmer Bradley ~

Remember playing on a seesaw and trying to achieve the balance that meant we and our friends could sit on opposite ends of the board, suspended in the air without the board moving up or down? To achieve such a balance we had to have only one thing in common with our friend: similar body weight.

Tonight we're still on that seesaw. We've spent our day trying to balance all that came our way. Some things may have weighed us down; others may have buoyed us in the air. Through living each day, we've learned that neither the high nor the low stays around long enough to tip the balance too far.

No matter what sits down on the opposite end of our board of life, we need to remember achieving balance is the important thing. When we are balanced, it means we have equalized both the good and the bad with our strength, hope, faith, and security.

The center of the board of life never moves. Help me to keep this center within me tonight.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Equal chances

So-called hopeless ones exist in almost every Twelve Step group. Included on this list are people who seem different from us. We feel that our chances of recovery are better than theirs. Sometimes our minds twist the facts so that we can feel superior.

Do we forget that we have all abused mind-altering chemicals? Do we forget that our common bond is a loving Higher Power, as we understand it—not our background, sexual orientation, age, or mental state? Our situations are many and varied. Anyone who has the desire to stay clean and sober and to start by being honest can make it.

Our Higher Power loves all of us, and we all have equal chances.

Do I extend my hand to all, even those I see as different from myself?

Higher Power, help me to see every person as being loved by his or her Higher Power.

Today I will work on my prejudices by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Fear is an emotion indispensable for survival.

~ HANNAH ARENDT ~

Newcomer

I have something to do that terrifies me. I've talked about it with other people, but nothing has taken away the fear. They make it sound easy, but then I hang up the phone, and it's as scary as ever. Other people don't really get it anyway; it's not the kind of thing everyone else is afraid of—it's something that I've always found hard. I wish I weren't such a coward.

Sponsor

We all have fears, and though rational discussion helps some of the time, it doesn't always remove them. What does work is taking the required action. Whether it's taking one of the Twelve Steps, auditioning for a part in a play, making love without drugs or alcohol, or simply making a dreaded phone call, when we begin to take actions in spite of the fear we feel, we are changed.

In our old days of active addiction, we missed out on opportunities to grow through doing what we found difficult. We may have avoided challenges by doing nothing, or by using addictive substances to foster numbness or defiance. Without the healthy kind of fear that we need for survival, we may have taken life-endangering risks.

Fear doesn't make us cowards. There is no courage without fear. If we fear nothing, we never have the experience of walking through our fears and letting our spirits expand.

Today, I walk through a fear; as I take action, I experience my courage.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We are all subjects to the habit of imagining a lot of needs and desires that we would not actually want if we stopped and gave the matter some thought. List those needs sometime and then think them over carefully. A yacht would be mighty nice in the summer but it's a pest in the winter. A fat bank account takes more thought and hard work to keep than it ever did to acquire. It is much nicer to just let your friends have these things and you be their guest.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Willingness and Action

God, help me remember that willingness without action is fantasy. I have left my fantasy life behind with my active addiction. The best way to get ready for action is to pray. Prayer makes me ready for success. Sometimes my prayers tell me to go right or left. Sometimes they just tell me to stand and wait for instructions. When I am willing to pray, I am willing to act. When I am willing, I am filled with prayer. Prayer always comes before action.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

RUNNING AWAY FROM LIFE

In the spiritual teaching we are told not to dwell upon our troubles, but instead, to realize the Presence of God where the troubles seem to be. Critics have suggested that this policy is "running away from life." Is it?

Suppose you found yourself in a house that was on fire; what would you do? You would leave the burning building as rapidly as possible. Would this be running away from life? Would it not rather be seeking life?

Sickness, sin, fear, and limitation—these things are not life—they are partial death; and they are to be overcome by turning toward life, which is divine harmony.

To turn away from evil and realize God instead is to liberate yourself, to help the world, and to glorify God.

Look unto me, and be ye saved, all the ends of the earth . . . (Isaiah 45:22).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Truth and Consequences

The essence of communication is intention.

~ Werner Erhard ~

While speaking with a woman whose partner had just left their relationship to marry another woman, she asked me, “Did you know that Walter was once in jail for embezzling?” No, I hadn’t known that. “I just thought you should know the truth about him,” she added. Her comments struck me as harsh and out of context. Reflecting on her position, I understood that she felt wounded by this man, and this was her way of retaliating or justifying her loss. But it was not truth that she was seeking to offer; it was injury.

Many a disservice has been rendered in the name of “telling the truth.” What use is telling the truth if our intention is to cause pain? The truth, like a knife, can be used to perform life-saving surgery or to maim. It is a power that must be used with consciousness, forethought, and service.

To make a rule that we must always tell all facts, thoughts, and feeling, is to open the door to unnecessary pain. Higher than any factual truth is the truth that we are loving beings, here to support one another in healing and awakening. If someone is not ready to hear a truth, or it would hurt them emotionally or damage them socially to speak it, we must yield to service rather than a rote rule.
Before speaking truth to someone, ask yourself some important ques–tions: What is my intention in offering this? How would I prefer to hear such a truth spoken to me? Am I truly seeking to communicate, or am I “dumping ” to relieve myself of upset or guilt? What do I want to come of this situation? How can I best serve everyone involved?

Consult your heart; it will guide you to offer truth in the highest way possible.

Guide me to speak healing words, that I may be closer to my brothers and sisters.

I use the truth to heal and bring peace.

[bluidkiti]

November 11

Step by Step

“When I am hungry, give me someone that I can feed. And when I am thirsty, give me someone who needs a drink. When I’m cold, give me someone to keep warm. And when I grieve, give me someone to console.” – Mother Teresa (1910-1997)

Today, the words of a religious icon transcends denominations and religion itself and embraces a fundamental ethic of AA – focus off self and on those who need it as much and more. The 12th step requires us to be of service by carrying AA’s message to those who need and want it. And by directing my focus on those who need the message and guidance through the other steps, I hope to have little time to dwell on myself, though not neglecting my responsibilities to my own program. At the same time, by listening and helping someone else resolve or reconcile their problems, I may have to eat crow if I think no one carries the weight that I do. My recovery requires abandonment of self, and the quality of my sobriety can be expected to be less than what it could be if I make my recovery about myself; my drinking was all about myself, and the outcome speaks for itself. Today, if I find someone who is hungry, who is thirsty, who is cold or who grieves, grant me the humanity to put their needs before my wants. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

HONESTY

No legacy is so rich as honesty.

~ Shakespeare ~

Honesty is vital to our recovery. It has to begin within us and must flow outward from us. To be true to ourselves, we must never say one thing and think another. When we were using, our denials spelled dishonesty. So did the false fronts we put up to impress others.

Dishonesty was motivated by fear and our low self-esteem. We hated ourselves, and we were afraid others would hate us too if we showed them honestly who we were. So we lied to them and to ourselves, trying to be the person we thought other people wanted us to be. In recovery, we learn to like the person we are. We have no more reason to lie or put up false fronts.

Today I will work to be honest in everything I say and do. I will be true to myself.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

A truth that’s told with bad intent Beats all the lies you can invent.

~ William Blake ~

Sometimes the truth is the most brutal thing we can deliver. In our recovery we work very hard to become honest with ourselves, but we must also learn how to handle the truth with others. We are guided to make amends to all those we have harmed, “except when to do so would injure them or others.” We must consider our motivations for expressing the truth and see that sometimes privacy and silence isn’t dishonest; it’s respectful.

The man who apologized to a married couple for his affair with the wife did no one any good by his apology. The man who freely gossips about others may speak the truth, but he only gratifies his selfish urges. We are learning to be clear and unflinching in our honesty with ourselves, and gentle and constructive in our honesty with others.

Today I will tell the truth in caring and respectful ways.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I am learning to trust myself by getting to know my Higher Power and then trusting the guidance I receive.

~ Helen Neujahr ~

Developing a relationship with our Higher Power rewards us in countless ways. The uncertainty about what to do and say in response to circumstances in our lives no longer binds us. The fear of being hurt or hurting others no longer haunts us. Uncontrollable events no longer worry us. Our lives are significantly more peaceful and positive when we get to know our Higher Power.

We felt so alone before. It’s not surprising that we didn’t trust ourselves. We were making decisions with no clear understanding of how they fit into the divine plan for our lives. Many of us, in fact, had no belief in a divine plan.

Hindsight, however, lets us see that our lives have been unfolding purposefully. And even though we may not have turned to a Higher Power, or not have believed in one, before getting into recovery, we were in God’s care. Trusting that guidance makes our lives today so much easier.

I will be quiet so that I can hear my Higher Power’s guidance.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can accept a breakthrough of my symptoms

I used to get scared and angry when my psychiatric illness would "break through" my medication and produce strong symptoms. Sometimes I wanted to hurt myself. Often I would shut myself up in my room. I was ashamed for what felt like a loss of control.

Having a symptom breakthrough is still hard to accept, what with working a program of dual recovery. However, I no longer feel so bad about myself when it happens. I have learned that even though I faithfully take my medication and go to meetings regularly for both my mental health and addiction, I am still powerless over my two no-fault biological illnesses. I am not a bad person, but a recovering person who is doing the best he can.

I will write out two ways I could help take care of myself if I experienced a breakthrough of symptoms.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Let us choose love and life.

~ Bernie Siegel ~

We had no choice about when or where we were born, what color hair we have, how tall we are, or whether or not we are left-handed. We did not choose to be born male or female, white, black, or brown, and we did not choose to be afflicted with the disease of addiction.

But we can choose to accept what we are, what we have, and what we will do about these things. Each day we awaken with a choice. It doesn’t matter if it’s rainy or sunny, hot or cold, or if we’re rich or poor. All these things are outside us, they are not what determines if we’re happy or not. That is our choice. We choose to make the most of our day, to be kind to ourselves, to tend to our recovery. We choose to be loving to another human being, to offer help or sympathy, to interact with the world — or to isolate ourselves.

Life is not lived outside us, but is determined by the ways we choose to interact with what’s outside us. Each thing we do or refuse to do is by choice, and no one makes our choices for us. Living well is a great responsibility, but with the help of our fellowship and our Higher Power, we can gladly accept the responsibilities of the present.

Today help me pay attention to the moment, and to make self-loving choices.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I remind myself every morning: Nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I’m going to learn, I must do it by listening.

~ Larry King ~

Think about those times when you are listening to talk radio or a television talk show and the dialogue gets heated between guests. Two or more people may be speaking or even shouting at the same time, and you realize you cannot hear what anyone is saying.

When you first came into the program, your mind may have been filled with so much self-talk that you could not take in what others were saying. Or you may have been so intent at conveying your own problems that you did all of the talking. But when you can still your mind and stop talking, you can experience the value of give and take in conversations. You can also gather information and guidance that will be useful for your recovery and growth.

Today make it a goal to be a good listener. Make eye contact with someone who is speaking. Try to not multitask at the same time. Overcome your need to respond before the speaker has finished talking. If you are not clear with what is being said, ask for clarification. And fight the urge to give advice unless the person asks, “What would you do in this situation?”

Today I will listen and learn from others.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

A satisfied flower is one whose petals are about to fall. The most beautiful rose is one hardly more than a bud wherein the pangs and ecstacies of desire are working for larger and finer growth.

~ Carl Sandburg ~

Every one of us in the program is a flower in a beautiful garden. The ones who move down the road of recovery are blooming right and strong. The newcomer and short-timers are just buds, soon to open in a burst of energy and color.

Our Higher Power tends this garden and provides us with room to grow, rich soil in which to root, ample nourishment, and the company of others. We are not all alike in this garden. We each bloom a different color, have a different petal pattern, and release our own fragrance. Yet our sensuous mixture yields an amazing scene of color, fragrance, and life.

At times we may feel uncomfortable in the garden. We may not feel as wise as some of the older flowers and may think our newness is still too bright. Yet we all belong and we will all be nourished as long as we are within the garden walls.

Do I believe I am unique and beautiful? I will let myself be part of the uniqueness and beauty in the program.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Trusting God’s love

Trusting that our Higher Power wants the best for us also means trusting that it wants the best for our loved ones. God works through everyone. We can’t believe that our Higher Power has led us through rebellion, pain, and suffering to this fellowship without believing it also guides everyone else.

Our Higher Power reaches people in different ways. We sometimes don’t understand the wisdom behind all this. All we can do is carry the message by being an example; the rest is in our Higher Power’s hands.

Do I feel secure knowing we are all guided by a Higher Power?

Higher Power, I entrust all those who are dear to me to your never failing care and love.

Today I will express my trust in my Higher Power’s love by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Natural abilities are like natural plants, that need pruning by study.

~ FRANCIS BACON ~

Newcomer

I'm so discouraged. I used to think I had so much talent. Now I can see that I'm not as good as hundreds of other people. While I was off hiding from reality in my addiction, other people were getting ahead of me.

Sponsor

Neither our talents nor our dreams have vanished. In recovery, we have the chance to explore the question of what kind of education and training we need to support our natural gifts, to help us take steps in the world, and to flourish.

For some of us, this may mean formal education; people in recovery are doing it all the time. Some of us may simply want instruction in a recreational pursuit that brings pleasure and expands our options. Books and articles, a peer support group, or friends with some time for hands-on help may be enough to get us started. The rest comes with experience, patience, and practice.

Still others of us may have had considerable experience and worldly success, but addiction has limited or interrupted our path. It takes courage and the willingness to think like a beginner again to find the way back to what matters to us. Our experience of hitting bottom and embracing recovery has given us insights, attitudes, and habits that enhance the experience of living.

Today, I have the willingness and courage to give myself a second chance at an old dream. I take small steps. I persist, no matter what.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

You are born at every sunrise and die at every sunset. Sleep is temporary death, which fortifies you for your rebirth in a new tomorrow. Every day is an entire life in itself and all human experiences can take place within its span.

You, yourself, are not the same man you were yesterday or the man you will be tomorrow. The world, too, changes with every revolution around the sun. One human being lives a day and another a hundred years yet each is a complete life.

Today is the only life you surely have. Make the best of it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

My Work Life

Today, I will pay attention to what recovery behaviors 1 could practice that would improve my work life. I will take care of myself on the job. God, help me let go of my need to be victimized by work. Help me be open to all the good stuff that is available to me through work.

~ From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie, page 247 ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

WITHOUT REHEARSAL

Someone said that living life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning to play the instrument as we go along. This saying describes the experience very well, but no one should worry about that. We are in this world for exactly that purpose—to learn.

While we are learning we do not expect to produce a perfect work. On this plane we are all students, and what matters is that each year we shall find the quality of our workmanship definitely better. People are sometimes depressed because their lives do not present a simple, logical, harmonious unfoldment, because their histories seem to be full of inconsistencies, repetitions, dead ends. This, however, is only to be expected during the learning period.

Your life has not been rehearsed. It is an adventure, and a discovery, and a training, and it is the final goal that matters.

And let us not be weary in welldoing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not (Galatians 6:9).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Direct Is Better

Let every man do according as he is disposed in his heart; not grudgingly, or of necessity.

~ Anonymous ~

I had an assistant named Joel who did not know how to say no. He would say yes to everything and then not do the things he did not want to do. Psychologists call this “passive-aggressive behavior.” Once I asked Joel to go into town to pick up a computer part. He assured me that he would, and then delayed and delayed doing it. Finally he made the trip one afternoon, and when I asked him about the part the next morning, he told me he could not find the shop. I gave Joel explicit instructions, and he went back into town the next afternoon. I received a call from him asking, “What was the name of that company?” After several attempts he finally got the part, but in retrospect, I wish he had told me outright that he did not wish to do the job. It would have been a lot easier to get some–one else to do it.

I have a simple definition of integrity: Say yes when you mean yes, no when you mean no, maybe when you mean maybe, and I don’t know when you mean I don’t know. We get into trouble and confuse others when we say yes when we mean no, maybe when we mean I don’t know, and on and on through all the permutations. You are in integrity when what you’re doing in the outer world matches what is real in your heart.

In college I read a book by Sidney Jourard called The Transparent Self. The title speaks for itself. We usually do much better to let people know what is going on inside of us than to play a presentation game that is out of synch with our inner truth.

When my friend told her teenage son that she did not like him hanging out with the working-class kids in school, he told her, “I like these kids because they’ll tell you exactly who they are and what is going on with them.”

If you tell your truth with your actions but not your words, you’re going to have to come back and admit where you are. Save yourself and others trouble by being direct at the outset; honesty always serves best.

Give me the courage to tell my truth in word and deed.

I trust -who I am, I speak what I believe, and I live what I know.

[bluidkiti]

November 12

Step by Step

Today, if my last drink was 24 Hours ago or many 24 Hours ago, I have a choice to put my last drink another 24 Hours behind me or to ignore all I have learned either by experience or being in the Program. I have the choice to reinforce the first step within myself, that “(I) am powerless over alcohol,” and at least be willing to believe in the possibility of a Higher Power. Or I can re-empower alcohol to take control again and take me to the certainty of where continued drinking will lead me. I may be insecure or uncertain about life without alcohol, but I know with certainty where continued drinking will take me. Today, my choice is to drink or not to drink. Experience is proof beyond doubt where I end up if I drink; the Program is proof positive where I can be if I don’t drink. Today, grant that I choose wisely. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

TAKING TIME

Easy Does It, But DO It!

~ Anonymous ~

We earnestly believe in "Easy Does It." We know that any spiritual progress re-quires time to grow. Maturity is not an overnight miracle. We need to remember to take things slowly. The faster we rush, the more danger there is of a relapse that could delay vital growth. Only impatient people try to climb ladders several steps at a time.

But we are also taught that slow-but- sure progress does not mean making no effort at all. If we procrastinate, we stop growing and stand still. To delay is to invite rationalization and develop the fear of failing. We seek steady growth by solving problems along the way. We learn from each victory, and take time to enjoy them.

I will remind myself today not to push myself faster than I need to go. I won't push the river, I'll let it flow.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

All self-knowledge is purchased at the cost of guilt.

~ Paul Tillich ~

When we take our searching and fearless moral inventory, we walk directly into our feelings of guilt. We have done wrong and hurt people and there is no longer any hiding from it. That is why we are called to be fearless in our search. A great reward follows our admission, and that reward is the chance to know ourselves and make peace with ourselves.

When we get honest with ourselves about the effects of our actions, we feel the pain that we avoided by denial. It was somehow easier to hide and escape than to stand up to the truth. When we stand up to the responsibility for our actions and their effects on others and ourselves, we actually stand taller and feel more self-respect. Guilt itself is not a bad thing, but holding on to it and leaving it unrepaired is. We may not have known that we were buying something very precious by facing our guilt.

Today I will face my responsibilities for my actions and receive the benefits of knowing myself better.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

In the end, I define what I think, feel, and believe.

~ Harriet Lerner ~

Many of us came into recovery confused about our beliefs. We tried to blend in with others, adopting their beliefs rather than risk looking different. Often we felt self-conscious, unsure of how to support our opinions if pressed. The game of pretend is finally over.

We don’t immediately know what we think and who we are just because we get sober. But Step Four helps us start unraveling our behavior. Being alone with ourselves in this process gives us our first honest glimpse of who we are. We are dismayed by some of our qualities and heartened by others. Let’s focus on the assets first.

Empowerment comes with doing a serious self- assessment. We soon understand that who we are is solely up to us. The real joy in this is realizing that who we will be, every moment of the day, is up to us too.

I am responsible for myself. What I think, feel, believe, and say is no one’s responsibility but my own. That feels good.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can practice believing that "this too shall pass"

Before I got into recovery, I was vulnerable. I reacted sharply and quickly to my emotions, especially anxiety and anger. Without asking for help often—without even thinking—I got high. I managed my problems with street drugs. I didn't know there was any other way.

But in the program I'm developing a better tool—faith. When I have faith, the cravings pass in minutes. When I let go, I find help, twenty-four hours a day, through my higher power and sponsor. When I believe that "this too shall pass," it is easier to accept my illnesses and the natural fluctuations of recovery.

As soon as I have cravings, I will put three program tools to work: the slogans, the telephone, and prayer.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth.

~ I John 3:18 ~

We are learning to break the cycle of addiction. By going into recovery, we are assuring that we will pass on much less dysfunction to our children. They will benefit from our new lives and the changes we are making. Now, we have become healthy role models, helping our children live better lives.

It is exciting to think that each successive generation will benefit from the recovery in our family today. Future children will be raised in families where active addiction has been replaced by more openness, honesty, clear thinking, and real communication. We can take pride in knowing that today’s work, today’s meeting, and today’s recovery will pay dividends for generations to come. In the meantime, we ourselves are living in the present with gratitude and healthy pride, choosing each day to affirm life.

Today let me show gratitude that recovery has benefits not only for my family but for future generations, too

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

What you become is more important than what you accomplish.

~ Author unknown ~

While there are twelve Steps in recovery and your work on them is made by moving through each, completion ol Step Twelve does not mean you have reached the end. So how, then, can you measure your progress?

Your anniversary date of when you stopped using is a way to measure the time in which you have been clean and sober. But the progress you have made in your growth, in the shifts and changes in your actions and behaviors, and in the quality of your life cannot be measured by a yardstick.

One way to measure progress is to ask your sponsor how you are doing. Hearing reassurance can help you understand you have made changes for the better. Another way is to reflect upon where you once were, how you once lived, the relationships you once had, and the addiction that once dominated your life. When you reflect upon your past and see it in the rear-view mirror, you can see the meaningful distance you have achieved from your former destructive way of living. When you are doing all you need to do in recovery, you are invested in the process and in the progress you can make.

Today I measure my progress by seeing the distance between my past life and my present way of living.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

How vastly different a troubled question looks to us at noonday and at midnight. We flinch in the hours of darkness from a problem we can meet bravely when we are on our feet, and under the momentum of the noonday vigor.

~ Charles B. Newcomb ~

We've often heard the phrase, "Things will look better in the morning." Somehow in the light of day, in the hustle and bustle of routines, our problems seem to recede from the shores of our minds. But as the hours turn from day to night, shadows lengthen, the stream of life stills, and our problems seem ready to wash up once again at our doors.

Perhaps we trust the day more because of the light and nature's rhythm. As night the darkness shrouds our vision, nature stops its movement, and people seem to be on their own rhythms. Yet we can trust the night by depending upon the light of the program and the natural flow extolled by the slogans. We can create our own rhythm and clear vision to see our way through a problem. Tonight can be secure to us if we will only trust.

I can work out solutions to my problems tonight as easily as if I were in the light of day by using the tools of the program.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Working the program

Who can adequately describe the serenity and fulfillment found in working the program through the years full of hard times and good times? Who can fully express the feelings of acceptance and peace we can now find when in the midst of chaos? How can we share the joy that spiritual growth has embedded into our lives?

For those who have lived in the depths of despair and suffering, passing into this new state of being is truly a miracle. And we know surely that this is available to all who are willing to work for it.

Am I willing to work the program whole-heartedly at all times?

Higher Power, help me remember always that working my program is the only way for me.

Today I will work the program especially hard by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

It is not true that life is one **** thing after another—it is one **** thing over and over.

~ EDNA ST. VINCENT MILLAY ~

Newcomer

I've been letting go of a habit that I thought of as minor, nothing like the addiction that brought me here. I'm surprised to discover that I'm having some of the same feelings that I had when I first entered this program. I want to indulge myself, cry, run, explode with rage. How can anything so small be such a big deal?

Sponsor

Congratulations on recognizing the importance of this habit and taking an action to change your relationship to it. You're describing withdrawal symptoms; it's likely that this habit has served the same purpose as that served by your primary addiction. Without this "minor habit," you're again face-to-face with reality.

Most of us have more than one way to protect ourselves from realities we believe we can't face. We overlook or excuse "minor" habits for years, until one day the "minor" habit becomes an addiction. Letting go of a "minor" habit may remind us of our experiences in early recovery. If we face our addictive feelings head-on, with our experience in recovery to support us, we'll walk away freer than we've ever felt before.

Let's remember that we don't have to go through physical or mental detoxification, or other major life changes, on our own. Now, more than ever, is the time for sharing. It works.

Today, when addictive feelings arise, I trust that they're getting ready to leave. I assist their passage by talking about them with people in recovery.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

No one ever became noble simply by being moral. The great characters who have had their ennobling influence pass down through the ages are those who lived, labored and died for others.

Nothing endures that fails to serve a useful purpose and man, individually or collectively, is no exception. We must be of constant service to humanity or we are useless members of society.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Accepting Every Task

Dear God, help me find the strength to be effective and accept responsibility. I am asking You for the strength I need each day. You have proven in countless lives that for every day I live, You will give me that necessary power. I must face every challenge that comes to me during the day sure that You will give me the strength to face it. I pray that I may accept every task as a challenge. I know I cannot wholly fail if You are with me.

~ Adapted from Twenty-Four Hours a Day, September 29 ~

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LET GOD!

People often say, "I try to do so-and-so, but I fail." The explanation for their failure is contained within the words themselves. You should never "try"; you should "let"—let God. When you "try" to do things, you are working from the outside. When you let God do them through you, you are working from the inside and success must come.

If you will reread the creation chapter in the Bible you will notice that God creates by "letting." God said "let," at every act of creation, and it was done. Now God creates by means of you if you will let him, but you must let. Someone said, "Let go and let God," and this is a wonderful recipe for overcoming fear or getting out of a tight place. In any case, the rule for creation is always to let.
Is any thing too hard for the Lord? (Genesis 18:14).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Select, Don’t Settle

It is not what you ask for that is appalling; what is appalling is what you settle for.

~ Alan Cohen ~

As a teenager, I regularly heard a radio jingle for a men’s clothing store in New York City: “Select, Don’t Settle, at Barney’s.” Although I did not realize it at the time, the message was offering a profound instruction for life.

How much of how you live your life is your preference, and how much are you settling for? On a piece of paper make two columns: I Select and I Settle. Then consider your activities in the course of a day, week, month, or year, and honestly record what you’re doing that comes from your heart and what you’re doing that comes from fear, obligation, or accommodation.

Every time we settle, we die a little bit inside. When we accept something that we would not choose, we affirm that we do not deserve to be happy and that the universe cannot support us in living our vision. When we make a stand for our goal, we affirm that we are worthy to live in a loving and abundant universe.

After a lecture, I was invited to the sponsor’s office to unwind. “What kind of tea would you like?” Melodie asked.

“Peppermint,” I told her.

“I’m not sure if we have peppermint,” she noted as she rummaged through the shelf.

Quickly I responded, “That’s okay? I’ll take whatever you have.”

Melodie turned and glared at me playfully, “Didn’t I just hear you give a lecture on not settling?" Oops. (It’s always annoying when your students or children use your truth against you.) She searched again and announced, “Peppermint!”

A humbling lesson, but a good one. Ask for what you want, and as long as there is a chance of getting it, keep asking.

I pray to live at choice. Give me the strength to claim my highest good and not stop until my dreams come true.

I deserve the kingdom. I choose my life with self-respect.

[bluidkiti]

November 13

Step by Step

” …(O)ur problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 7 (“Working With Others”), p 103.

Today, if alcohol is or was “only a symbol” or a symptom of some other “dis-ease” within me, abstinence alone is not enough to recover. If it were, there would be no use for AA. But they were written for a purpose, and the purpose is to treat my entire being and not only the symptoms that fueled my drinking. And, most likely, the root problem is my spiritual and emotional condition that I medicated with alcohol. Just as likely is that if I apply a band-aid of abstinence without treating the wound, the band-aid, like it always does, will lose its adhesiveness, and all my fight against temptation or craving will be for naught. The steps are the treatment of the disease: the Fourth Step to come to terms with the bankruptcy of my emotional and spiritual psyche, and the 10th step for maintenance of the Fourth; forgiving others if I expect them to forgive me; and, just as vital, service to others so that I not again become the focus of my world. Today, I look to the steps to treat my disease, not just its symptoms. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

GOALS

One who fears, limits their activities. Failure is only the opportunity to more wisely begin again.

~ Henry Ford ~

In sharing with others, especially with our fellow members, we must never be timid about discussing goals, both for a lifetime and for short duration. When we are afraid of failure, we may take no action in setting goals. No one will be scornful of us if we fall short of a mark.

There is more worth in aiming at a target and missing than in shooting blindly. When others encourage us and refuse to let us be depressed by failures, we can take aim and try again. If our goals are realistic, we will reach them. If we tall short, we know we have at least made progress toward our target. The important thing is to aim for the things we need and do our best to get there.

I will set myself realistic goals and work to reach them, but I won't be let down and quit if I fall short. I'll just take better aim next time.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

We know what a person thinks, not when he tells us what he thinks, but by his actions.

~ Isaac Bashevis Singer ~

Until we gain enough self-awareness, we may mistake our words for the truth. Many of us have developed patterns of self-deception to serve our addictions and codependency. It’s as if we believe that if we can make it sound good, it must be true. And if we are good with words, we can make almost any choice or any action sound good, especially to ourselves. We also value the approval of others so we are tempted to say the “right” thing even if it doesn’t match what is in our hearts.

As we grow stronger, we value honesty with ourselves more deeply. We have greater self-esteem and we no longer betray or deceive ourselves. We learn to discern the difference between “just words” and the truth spoken from our hearts. Our words no longer cover our actions or substitute for them; our words help us better understand our actions. Words can now be used to express and clarify what we do.

Today my words will express and clarify my actions, not obscure them.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The more I wonder... the more I love.

~ Alice Walker ~

How often do we contemplate the miracles that surround us every moment of the day? Do we often stop to appreciate the evidence of these miracles? We have survived many harrowing experiences. But do we understand that our survival is one of God’s miracles?
God’s love for us is and has always been unconditional. No matter how bad we thought we were when we were drinking or using, God loved us. Realizing that God loves each of us equally gives us pause to wonder. Acknowledging this miracle enhances our willingness to love too.

Wonderment strengthens our humility. And from that grows love. We may have come into this recovery program believing it’s impossible to love ourselves and others, but the more we cultivate our appreciation for God’s intervention on behalf of us all, the easier our task.

Pausing to reflect on my good fortune today will make loving easier.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can handle problems while they are still small

Why am I so tired out these days? I come home at night and can hardly watch TV I thought my dual recovery was on track, but I feel irritable and unfriendly. I also think I'm eating more than I need to. What's going on?

Come to think about it, my spouse and I still haven't settled some money matters. Then there's my new boss at work. And the car needs a tune-up and a muffler. Maybe this is what's going on. Maybe I've got a lot on my mind and it's starting to affect me. It's time to pay attention to these relapse warning signs, ask my higher power for help, and start dealing with my problems.

I'll use my nightly Step Ten inventory to help monitor the stress in my life.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Not what we give, but what toe share —
For the gift without the giver is bare....

~ James Russell Lowell ~

Alcoholism and other addictions are selfish diseases. In the past they caused us to think only of ourselves and never of others. “How do I get out of this jam?” “How do I get another drink or drug?” Addiction is an “I” disease.

Recovery begins with “we,” when we identify with others who have the illness and become willing to listen. Recovery works because it helps us out of ourselves: our self-pity, our self-centeredness, and our selfishness.

After we work a “we” program and gain a solid foundation for recovery, we begin to develop the ability to think of others and the “you” stage begins. “How are you doing?” “How can I help you?” “I am concerned about you.” “I care about you.”

This is a sign of true change, a sign that our lives are much more open and fulfilled. It is also a sign of our Higher Power’s love at work in our lives. We have begun to connect, not through want or need, but through willingness to give and share.

Today I pray that I may finally become able to love and care about others, that I may be able to reach out.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.

~ Brian Tracy ~

If you wanted to add an addition to your home, you would need to extend your home’s foundation and frame the room. You would need to match the roofline of your home to that of the addition. You would need to extend your electrical system and add heating and cooling elements. And you would need to paint or wallpaper the walls and add furniture and other decorations.

Similarly, your recovery is filled with abundant challenges. This addition to your life requires you to make many changes from how you once lived. You need to build a foundation of abstinence so you can reframe a new way of living. You need to create new goals so you can continue to take care of your needs and responsibilities. You need to cope with the pain of withdrawal and grieve the loss of your habit. You need to distance yourself from those who might lead you into temptation.

As you recover from your addiction, you will have more room in which to grow. You have also added a greater value to your life and enhanced the quality of day-to-day living.

I will challenge myself in my recovery so my life has greater value and inclining.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Some minds remain open long enough for truth not only to enter but to pass on through by way of a ready exit without pausing anywhere along the route.

~ Sister Elizabeth Kenny ~

Many times what someone says hurts us. If someone is pointing out a character defect or being critical of our work, we may find it difficult to listen. But before we react, we need to ask whether the person is being destructive or constructive in his or her speech. We can ignore destructive words by detaching, but we need to listen to constructive words. There is a reason to hear such words, even though they may hurt or make us feel defensive.

To become a total listener rather than a selective listener, we can let people finish what they need to say. Silence and an open mind can help us hear all their words. By truly listening and then responding maturely, we will grasp the message and perhaps see the love and caring with which it is delivered.

Tomorrow, I will not react to things said to me. I will truly listen and then respond maturely and gently.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Practicing principles

Reading, discussing, studying, thinking, or any other form of intellectual pursuit may play a role in helping us find our Higher Power. But we don’t experience our Higher Power unless we put our principles into action. When we practice our principles, we set ourselves free so that our behavior does not stand between us and our Higher Power.

The insights we get from reading, dis-cussing, studying, thinking, and so on are healthy food for thought. To gain the freedom that comes from feeling our Higher Power, we practice the principles.

Have I stopped intellectualizing about God?

Higher Power, remind me that insight is not freedom and help me do what is necessary to find and to know you completely.

I will put my principles into action by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Luck is just a matter of preparation meeting opportunity.

~ OPRAH WINFREY ~

Newcomer

Nothing good is coming into my life right now. I feel stuck.

Sponsor

While we don't control what happens in our lives, we do have the ability to articulate our goals. We need to invite positive happenings by making room for them in our psyches and to recognize and acknowledge the positive when it does show up.

Prayer is one medium for acknowledging the gifts we already have and for affirming faith in the possibilities our lives hold. Writing—which might include making a gratitude list, writing about our current experience of one of the Twelve Steps, or writing down our goals so that they are clear to us—is another tool for cultivating positive attitudes that prepare us for success.

Visualization is another powerful tool. Visualization involves seeing in detail, in our mind's eye, exactly what we hope to accomplish. A writer I know began work on a book by visualizing the entire process of producing it: completing pages, mailing the manuscript, even holding the publisher's check in his hand. He visualized printing presses running, the binder gluing the cover, the distributor making shipments, readers buying the book. This process wasn't willful or magical; it was a tool for creating the mental conditions he needed to believe in himself and to complete his project. Visualization can change our mind-set and prepare us to recognize opportunity when we meet it.

Today, I rehearse the positive in my imagination, embracing it when it comes.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is one of the peculiar characteristics of the alcoholic that he almost invariably shows the worst side of his disposition to those people for whom he has the highest love and respect.

Many of us were Jolly Good Fellows in the bootleg joint but Hell on wheels at home and in our relationship with those we loved.

If your disposition is so lousy that it isn't fit to be brtiught out on the street, then it isn't worth house room.

Fortunately, sobriety usually cures this.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Sleepless Nights

Thank You, Father, that the longest night
ends in dawn and a new day.
Thank You, that Your mercies are new every morning.
Clear from my mind now all black thoughts of the
night and give me confidence as I face today.
Give me strength in my tiredness and the sure hope
that Your love will guard and keep me.

~ by Lancelot Andrewes ~

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

A DEPENDABLE RECIPE

When you make a cake, you know that whatever you put into your mixing bowl will appear in the cake itself, and, on the other hand, that unless a particular substance does go into the mixing bowl, it cannot appear in the finished article.

The thoughts and beliefs that fill our minds ultimately appear in the cake of experience, and to realize this is to save oneself a lot of trouble. No one puts kerosene in the mixing bowl because no one wants it in the cake, for everyone knows that, if it does enter the bowl, in the cake it will be.

. . . they that plow iniquity, and sow wickedness, reap the same (Job 4:8).

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Must Be Some Mistake

Miracles are examples of right thinking, aligning your perception with truth as God created it.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

Kathi returned to her hotel room to spruce up before her evening meeting. As she stood in the bathroom brushing her teeth, she was shocked to see a tall burly man standing in her shower. Before she could say a word, he grabbed her and started to wrestle her to the floor. “Suddenly the whole scene went into slow motion, and I became an observer,” Kathi told me. “I started to scream, but it was as if I was watching myself from a distance. Then something came over me. I ceased to see myself as a victim of an attack, and my heart became filled with only love and compassion. All I could think was, there must be some mistake here. This man is my brother; there is no reason for him to do this.' All this happened in a flash, and in spite of the outer struggle that ensued, inside I felt at peace. Then something truly miraculous happened. Suddenly the man stopped and said, ‘There must be some mistake here; I’m in the wrong room. I have to go. I’m sorry.’ He ran out the door, and that quickly it was all over.”

A Course in Miracles reminds us that “miracles are natural. When they do not occur, something has gone wrong.” The laws of miracles reverse the laws of the world, which tell us that it is natural for life not to work, and when it does, it is an exception. But the universe was designed to work, and in spite of appearances, it does. All of life, from the tiniest amoeba to the trillions of stars, planets, and galaxies, operates with clockwork precision. Surely there is an intelligent force with an unfathomably creative mind and loving heart behind such magnificent perfection!

Success, harmony, and happiness are not mistakes; they are our natural state. When we remember that love is who we are, miracles occur continuously.

Help me remember that there is only love. Let me always be aware of Your comforting presence.

I am safe because love is the only reality.

[bluidkiti]

November 14

Step by Step

“Selfishness – self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 5 (“How It Works”), p 62.

Today: “…we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.” The boomerang effect. If I harbor thoughts of exacting revenge on those who have wronged me – real or perceived – I would be wise to reach back into my yesterdays and remember that my best-laid plans of revenge or comeuppance for someone else have usually acted like a boomerang and sneaked from behind to crack me in the head. If I am not yet able to let go for whatever emotion I hold against anyone I think has hurt me, perhaps I can understand that setting out to inflict intentional harm or injury – revenge – may well put me in the position of being hurt somewhere down the road. And the selfishness that drives the engine to quench that thirst for revenge is the precursor of resentment which is our most formidable and potentially lethal opponent. Today, if I can’t or won’t let go thoughts of getting revenge on someone and hoping for their day of reckoning, I may be better served to understand that I may be setting a trap for myself. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

GOALS

One who fears, limits their activities. Failure is only the opportunity to more wisely begin again.

~ Henry Ford ~

In sharing with others, especially with our fellow members, we must never be timid about discussing goals, both for a lifetime and for short duration. When we are afraid of failure, we may take no action in setting goals. No one will be scornful of us if we fall short of a mark.

There is more worth in aiming at a target and missing than in shooting blindly. When others encourage us and refuse to let us be depressed by failures, we can take aim and try again. If our goals are realistic, we will reach them. If we tall short, we know we have at least made progress toward our target. The important thing is to aim for the things we need and do our best to get there.

I will set myself realistic goals and work to reach them, but I won't be let down and quit if I fall short. I'll just take better aim next time.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

We know what a person thinks, not when he tells us what he thinks, but by his actions.

~ Isaac Bashevis Singer ~

Until we gain enough self-awareness, we may mistake our words for the truth. Many of us have developed patterns of self-deception to serve our addictions and codependency. It’s as if we believe that if we can make it sound good, it must be true. And if we are good with words, we can make almost any choice or any action sound good, especially to ourselves. We also value the approval of others so we are tempted to say the “right” thing even if it doesn’t match what is in our hearts.

As we grow stronger, we value honesty with ourselves more deeply. We have greater self-esteem and we no longer betray or deceive ourselves. We learn to discern the difference between “just words” and the truth spoken from our hearts. Our words no longer cover our actions or substitute for them; our words help us better understand our actions. Words can now be used to express and clarify what we do.

Today my words will express and clarify my actions, not obscure them.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The more I wonder... the more I love.

~ Alice Walker ~

How often do we contemplate the miracles that surround us every moment of the day? Do we often stop to appreciate the evidence of these miracles? We have survived many harrowing experiences. But do we understand that our survival is one of God’s miracles?
God’s love for us is and has always been unconditional. No matter how bad we thought we were when we were drinking or using, God loved us. Realizing that God loves each of us equally gives us pause to wonder. Acknowledging this miracle enhances our willingness to love too.

Wonderment strengthens our humility. And from that grows love. We may have come into this recovery program believing it’s impossible to love ourselves and others, but the more we cultivate our appreciation for God’s intervention on behalf of us all, the easier our task.

Pausing to reflect on my good fortune today will make loving easier.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can handle problems while they are still small

Why am I so tired out these days? I come home at night and can hardly watch TV I thought my dual recovery was on track, but I feel irritable and unfriendly. I also think I'm eating more than I need to. What's going on?

Come to think about it, my spouse and I still haven't settled some money matters. Then there's my new boss at work. And the car needs a tune-up and a muffler. Maybe this is what's going on. Maybe I've got a lot on my mind and it's starting to affect me. It's time to pay attention to these relapse warning signs, ask my higher power for help, and start dealing with my problems.

I'll use my nightly Step Ten inventory to help monitor the stress in my life.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Not what we give, but what toe share —
For the gift without the giver is bare....

~ James Russell Lowell ~

Alcoholism and other addictions are selfish diseases. In the past they caused us to think only of ourselves and never of others. “How do I get out of this jam?” “How do I get another drink or drug?” Addiction is an “I” disease.

Recovery begins with “we,” when we identify with others who have the illness and become willing to listen. Recovery works because it helps us out of ourselves: our self-pity, our self-centeredness, and our selfishness.

After we work a “we” program and gain a solid foundation for recovery, we begin to develop the ability to think of others and the “you” stage begins. “How are you doing?” “How can I help you?” “I am concerned about you.” “I care about you.”

This is a sign of true change, a sign that our lives are much more open and fulfilled. It is also a sign of our Higher Power’s love at work in our lives. We have begun to connect, not through want or need, but through willingness to give and share.

Today I pray that I may finally become able to love and care about others, that I may be able to reach out.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.

~ Brian Tracy ~

If you wanted to add an addition to your home, you would need to extend your home’s foundation and frame the room. You would need to match the roofline of your home to that of the addition. You would need to extend your electrical system and add heating and cooling elements. And you would need to paint or wallpaper the walls and add furniture and other decorations.

Similarly, your recovery is filled with abundant challenges. This addition to your life requires you to make many changes from how you once lived. You need to build a foundation of abstinence so you can reframe a new way of living. You need to create new goals so you can continue to take care of your needs and responsibilities. You need to cope with the pain of withdrawal and grieve the loss of your habit. You need to distance yourself from those who might lead you into temptation.

As you recover from your addiction, you will have more room in which to grow. You have also added a greater value to your life and enhanced the quality of day-to-day living.

I will challenge myself in my recovery so my life has greater value and inclining.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Some minds remain open long enough for truth not only to enter but to pass on through by way of a ready exit without pausing anywhere along the route.

~ Sister Elizabeth Kenny ~

Many times what someone says hurts us. If someone is pointing out a character defect or being critical of our work, we may find it difficult to listen. But before we react, we need to ask whether the person is being destructive or constructive in his or her speech. We can ignore destructive words by detaching, but we need to listen to constructive words. There is a reason to hear such words, even though they may hurt or make us feel defensive.

To become a total listener rather than a selective listener, we can let people finish what they need to say. Silence and an open mind can help us hear all their words. By truly listening and then responding maturely, we will grasp the message and perhaps see the love and caring with which it is delivered.

Tomorrow, I will not react to things said to me. I will truly listen and then respond maturely and gently.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Practicing principles

Reading, discussing, studying, thinking, or any other form of intellectual pursuit may play a role in helping us find our Higher Power. But we don’t experience our Higher Power unless we put our principles into action. When we practice our principles, we set ourselves free so that our behavior does not stand between us and our Higher Power.

The insights we get from reading, dis-cussing, studying, thinking, and so on are healthy food for thought. To gain the freedom that comes from feeling our Higher Power, we practice the principles.

Have I stopped intellectualizing about God?

Higher Power, remind me that insight is not freedom and help me do what is necessary to find and to know you completely.

I will put my principles into action by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Luck is just a matter of preparation meeting opportunity.

~ OPRAH WINFREY ~

Newcomer

Nothing good is coming into my life right now. I feel stuck.

Sponsor

While we don't control what happens in our lives, we do have the ability to articulate our goals. We need to invite positive happenings by making room for them in our psyches and to recognize and acknowledge the positive when it does show up.

Prayer is one medium for acknowledging the gifts we already have and for affirming faith in the possibilities our lives hold. Writing—which might include making a gratitude list, writing about our current experience of one of the Twelve Steps, or writing down our goals so that they are clear to us—is another tool for cultivating positive attitudes that prepare us for success.

Visualization is another powerful tool. Visualization involves seeing in detail, in our mind's eye, exactly what we hope to accomplish. A writer I know began work on a book by visualizing the entire process of producing it: completing pages, mailing the manuscript, even holding the publisher's check in his hand. He visualized printing presses running, the binder gluing the cover, the distributor making shipments, readers buying the book. This process wasn't willful or magical; it was a tool for creating the mental conditions he needed to believe in himself and to complete his project. Visualization can change our mind-set and prepare us to recognize opportunity when we meet it.

Today, I rehearse the positive in my imagination, embracing it when it comes.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It is one of the peculiar characteristics of the alcoholic that he almost invariably shows the worst side of his disposition to those people for whom he has the highest love and respect.

Many of us were Jolly Good Fellows in the bootleg joint but Hell on wheels at home and in our relationship with those we loved.

If your disposition is so lousy that it isn't fit to be brtiught out on the street, then it isn't worth house room.

Fortunately, sobriety usually cures this.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Sleepless Nights

Thank You, Father, that the longest night
ends in dawn and a new day.
Thank You, that Your mercies are new every morning.
Clear from my mind now all black thoughts of the
night and give me confidence as I face today.
Give me strength in my tiredness and the sure hope
that Your love will guard and keep me.

~ by Lancelot Andrewes ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

A DEPENDABLE RECIPE

When you make a cake, you know that whatever you put into your mixing bowl will appear in the cake itself, and, on the other hand, that unless a particular substance does go into the mixing bowl, it cannot appear in the finished article.

The thoughts and beliefs that fill our minds ultimately appear in the cake of experience, and to realize this is to save oneself a lot of trouble. No one puts kerosene in the mixing bowl because no one wants it in the cake, for everyone knows that, if it does enter the bowl, in the cake it will be.

. . . they that plow iniquity, and sow wickedness, reap the same (Job 4:8).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Must Be Some Mistake

Miracles are examples of right thinking, aligning your perception with truth as God created it.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

Kathi returned to her hotel room to spruce up before her evening meeting. As she stood in the bathroom brushing her teeth, she was shocked to see a tall burly man standing in her shower. Before she could say a word, he grabbed her and started to wrestle her to the floor. “Suddenly the whole scene went into slow motion, and I became an observer,” Kathi told me. “I started to scream, but it was as if I was watching myself from a distance. Then something came over me. I ceased to see myself as a victim of an attack, and my heart became filled with only love and compassion. All I could think was, there must be some mistake here. This man is my brother; there is no reason for him to do this.' All this happened in a flash, and in spite of the outer struggle that ensued, inside I felt at peace. Then something truly miraculous happened. Suddenly the man stopped and said, ‘There must be some mistake here; I’m in the wrong room. I have to go. I’m sorry.’ He ran out the door, and that quickly it was all over.”

A Course in Miracles reminds us that “miracles are natural. When they do not occur, something has gone wrong.” The laws of miracles reverse the laws of the world, which tell us that it is natural for life not to work, and when it does, it is an exception. But the universe was designed to work, and in spite of appearances, it does. All of life, from the tiniest amoeba to the trillions of stars, planets, and galaxies, operates with clockwork precision. Surely there is an intelligent force with an unfathomably creative mind and loving heart behind such magnificent perfection!

Success, harmony, and happiness are not mistakes; they are our natural state. When we remember that love is who we are, miracles occur continuously.

Help me remember that there is only love. Let me always be aware of Your comforting presence.

I am safe because love is the only reality.

[bluidkiti]

November 15

Step by Step

” …(L)ife among Alcoholics Anonymous is more than attending gatherings and visiting hospitals. Cleaning up old scrapes, helping to settle family differences, explaining the disinherited son to his irate parents, lending money and securing jobs for each other, when justified – these are everyday occurrences. No one is too discredited or has sunk too low to be welcomed cordially – if he means business.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 11 (“A Vision For You”), p 161.

Today, I know through faith that I am not “too discredited” or ” too low” to begin recovery. But I have to “mean business.” What does this mean? That I absolutely must surrender in Step One that “(I) am powerless” over alcohol or any other addictive or compulsive substance and behavior, and then to Step Two where I must at least be open to the possibility of a power stronger and greater than myself. When I can say honestly that I have bowed to these two steps, I am “ready to take certain steps,” the ones that lead me beyond being dry to getting sober. Yet working the steps and going to meetings are not enough. “Cleaning up” the wreckage of my drinking days requires work beyond mouthing the words of the steps and going to meetings. My recovery takes work. I have no right to sobriety: I must earn it. And once I have received it, God granting, I will have the wisdom and knowledge to nurture it, and that means continued working of the steps, reassessing my program to change as I hopefully grow in my recovery and, just as important, being in service to those who need and want the lifeline of AA. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EMOTIONS

All great discoveries are made by men whose feelings run ahead of their thinking.

~ C.H. Parkhurst ~

We spend our time wisely with our fellow members when we talk about our use of emotions. Much pain can be avoided if we learn early not to fear displaying feelings. We can make friends of our emotions, instead of treating them like enemies. Indeed, it is an old saying that emotions taught mankind to reason. We will always need energy to reach goals, and every emotion is a source of energy. None are static.

Power comes from our feelings. Only robots are emotionless. We need drive to direct dangerous emotions (like fear and anger) into useful channels and to keep the finer feeling of love and humility from becoming weaknesses by overdoing them. We should always choose positive emotions over negative ones.

I will be most productive in life when I learn that emotional stability is necessary, and that I can FEEL with my mind and THINK with my heart.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing the dawn will come.

~ Anne Lamott ~

Darkness is no stranger to any adult. Some of us know all too well how dark some nights can seem. Many of us in our darkest hours have even considered ending our lives. At those times we feel totally alone and don’t see any hope remaining. And yet we keep putting one foot in front of the other, feeling no hope except the hope that we will find hope. The small flickering light of stubborn hope continues to bum.

Even when we cannot see the light, dawn always comes. It doesn’t come when we want it to. It doesn’t arrive when we feel we deserve it. Dawn comes on its own time. What we are required to do is to keep showing up.

Today I will keep putting one foot in front of the other, knowing that darkness and light are part of the rhythm of life.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Life isn’t always that bowl full of cherries. It’s sometimes very difficult and painful and we don’t feel prepared for it.

~ Thelma Elliott ~

The loss of an intimate friend, the death of a spouse, the failure to get a promotion—each can devastate us, at least for a time. It’s really not possible to be emotionally prepared for many of the experiences we are destined to have. We can, however, grow accustomed to letting our Higher Power walk us through every situation. And as we grow in our acceptance of God’s presence, we will discover that no experience can fully devastate us again.

The blessing that is present through painful encounters is the awareness that we are never alone. God never forces us to walk through trouble by ourselves. No opportunity to grow will ever be devoid of God’s presence. God is here, now, awaiting our request for help. Asking will result in a wave of peacefulness followed by a sense of wellbeing that will not leave us as long as we keep our hearts open to God.

I will invite God to be with me throughout the day today. Knowing that God is present will make every experience easier to handle.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I do not want to be labeled

If I had symptoms of my psychiatric illness in public, I would not want people to think, "She's crazy." If I relapsed to my addiction in public, I would not want people to think, "She's a drunk" or "She's an addict."

I am a human being. I am a valuable person. And I experience symptoms of psychiatric illness and addiction. I want to be known by my essence and my potential, not by my no- fault illnesses.

I will write out a flash card that reads, "I am a valuable person in recovery from a dual disorder."

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Habit is overcome by habit.

~ Thomas a Kempis ~

We have given up many things for the sake of our recovery. We gave up our drug of choice, our fear, our unhealthy lifestyle, our addicted friends. We are still giving up these things and more: our self-hate, our grandiosity, our manipulations, our resentments.

But we can’t do any of this without replacing what’s gone. This is what our recovery program is all about. We work to replace fear with honesty, resentment with forgiveness, manipulations with acceptance. We are working each day to completely remake our lives, bit by bit. We are replacing unhealthy habits with healthy ones. The difference between these habits now is that we are conscious of them, and we are fully aware of their power in our lives. When we worked alone and lived lives of avoidance and pain, our habits were deadly. These new habits become stronger each time we practice them, and our lives become more open to new growth and change. Now that we are no longer alone we have picked up another new habit — we are building a life of self- awareness and self-love.

Today let me practice gratitude for my new habits.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The Lion and the Mouse

A lion was taking a nap in the forest when a mouse began to run up and down the lion’s body. This awakened the lion, which caught the mouse and was going to eat it. But the little creature spoke. “I beg your pardon, great king of the forest,” it squeaked. “Please forgive me for waking you.

If you would spare my life I promise to return the favor one day.”

The lion let out a snicker. “How could you possibly save a creature as powerful as I? I find that hard to believe, but I am feeling gracious today.” So the lion freed the mouse.

Sometime later the lion was caught in a trap. The hunters wanted to impress the king with a live lion, so they tied the lion to a tree and set off to obtain a wagon. After the hunters had left, the mouse came upon the lion. It began to gnaw at the rope. When the lion was freed the mouse asked, “Did I not live up to my promise?”

The moral of the story: Little friends may prove to be great friends.

There are new friends you can make in recovery who can provide you with comfort and support and help you stay clean and sober.

I will appreciate the friends I make in the program.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Delegate freely . . . and check on it every chance you get.

~ Linda Johnson Rice ~

When we ask that something be done, do we let go and let the job get done, or do we worry it won't be done on time or how we want it? Part of learning to trust others is to learn when to let go and let other people handle something in their own way.

We can look back on today and remember requests we made. Perhaps we asked an employee for assistance, a child to do a project, or our partner to do something important. After we made the request, did we then let go or were we filled with worry and doubt about whether our request would be honored?

Tonight we can let go of our requests and trust all will be taken care of. If it is not, that doesn't mean we can never trust anyone again. It may mean our request was unreasonable or other circumstances intervened. It's okay if we make a request and don't get results that meet our expectations. Trust doesn't mean we will get what we want when we want it and how we want it. Trust means having enough faith to ask another—and to let it go.

Tonight I can let go of requests unhonored today.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Seeking spirituality

Spiritual growth is an urge and a quest. The urge comes from within, and the quest, which is an outward manifestation, comes from the urge. Our quest suffers considerably when we make mind-altering chemicals our Higher Power. The urge for spiritual growth is still within us, but we have either lost sight of or have yet to find our true purpose. Staying chained to our addiction only keeps us from a meaningful destiny.

For us the quest is our program. While the urge for spiritual growth is always an individual one, we are privileged to share the same quest in our fellowship.

Have I joined the common quest?

Higher Power, let my quest for spiritual growth be in keeping with my true purpose.

Today I will seek to fulfill my urge for spiritual growth by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

If they try to rush me, I always say, "I've only got one other speed—and it's slower."

~ GLENN FORD ~

Newcomer

I've been working like a maniac, running around like a chicken with its head cut off. And I don't have that much to show for all this effort.

Sponsor

How is it that "slow" got to be a negative word? To me, it holds the possibility of safety, care, thoughtful reflection, and taking pleasure in details. Many things today are sup-posed to happen at breakneck speed. Fast food, electronic mail, and express flights encourage us to think that we're performing inadequately if we can't proceed at a faster pace than feels comfortable.

In the past, I'd sometimes try to get two days' work done in one, even staying awake all night to meet a deadline. While I sometimes met my goal for that twenty-four-hour period, I'd be exhausted and perhaps ill the next day. I'd lose an entire day catching up with myself. I'd have defeated my purpose of getting ahead and made errors of judgment in the process, too fatigued to see my mistakes.

We're not machines. We may have periods of seeming inactivity and periods of accelerated activity; growth often happens in spurts. But if we set out to be deliberate and consistent, whatever our pace, we will get things accomplished, and we won't burn ourselves out.

Today, I'm not in a race. I respect my body's signals about pacing.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We alcoholics were accustomed to look at the world through whisky glasses and consequently what we saw of the world made it appear as one big case of D.T.'s.

Sobriety corrected our vision and the world took on a more ordered appearance. The world hadn't changed — our viewpoint had.

If the world still doesn't look good to you — probably you are still looking through your old glasses.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Countless Gifts of Love

Now thank we all our God,
With heart and hand and voices,
Who wondrous things has done,
In whom His world rejoices;
Who from our mother's arms
Has blessed us on our way
With countless gifts of love
And still is ours today.

O may this bounteous God,
Through all our life near us,
With ever joyful hearts
And blessed peace to cheer us,
Keep us in His grace,
And guide us when perplexed,
And free us from all ills
In this world and the next.

~ by Martin Rinkart ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

ON MINDING ONE'S BUSINESS

It would probably be safe to say that more than half of the evil in the world is due to well-meaning busybodies who just cannot refrain from interfering. Needless to say, such people never have harmony or success in their own lives, for it is an invariable rule that he who minds his neighbor's business, neglects his own.

To interfere mentally in any situation involves you in the consequences just as much as would a physical interference. Of course, where it is your duty to concern yourself in any matter, you must do so—constructively and spiritually—and then the consequences to you can only be good.

For every man shall bear his own burden (Galatians 6:5).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Firewalking

Feel the fear and do it anyway.

~ Dr. Susan Jeffers ~

Do you know the difference between courage and fearlessness? When you’re fearless, you’re not frightened by the task at hand, and you simply go ahead and do it. When you’re courageous, however, you feel afraid and walk ahead in spite of it.

In this world, courage is far more important than fearlessness. One of our missions in life is to discover what holds us back from being ourselves and dismantle our illusions.

If we do not face our fears, we cannot heal them. Someone who is not afraid of snakes may walk into a snake pit and impress everyone who sees him; such an act is of little value, though, as there is no risk, stretch, or growth; he is doing something that is easy for him. If, however, he harbors a fear of public speaking, he would accomplish more by joining Toast-masters than walking through a snake pit.

Fear is not real, for if it were, everyone would be afraid of the same things. The word real implies constancy if you’re afraid of spiders and I’m not, and if I fear enclosed spaces and you do not, we demonstrate that there is nothing inherently fear-inducing about spiders or closed spaces. The next time you face a fear, think of someone you know who is not afraid of that thing, and visualize the ease and peace with which they would handle that experience.

Make a list of your responses to the open-ended statement, “If I were not afraid, I would...” Include only those responses that you would make if fear were not a block. Then just do them. One by one, walk through your fears, and you will discover that none of them has any power whatsoever.

Help me to be bigger than fear. I can do all things with the strength You give me.

My nature is love and strength. I overcome all fear with the power of peace.