Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - January

[bluidkiti]

January 1

Step by Step

“FOREWORD TO SECOND EDITION

Figures given in this foreword describe the Fellowship as it was in 1955
“Since the original Foreword to this book was written in 1939, a wholesale miracle has taken place. Our earliest printing voiced the hope ‘that every alcoholic who journeys will find the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous at his destination. Already,’ continues the early text, ‘twos and threes and fives of us have sprung up in other communities.’

“Sixteen years have elapsed between our first printing of this book and the presentation in 1955 of our second edition. In that brief space, Alcoholics Anonymous has mushroomed into nearly 6,000 groups whose membership is far above 150,000 recovered alcoholics.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Foreword to the Second Edition,” p xv.

Today, when tradition prods us to think in terms of new beginnings and resolutions, the history of AA as measured in the years between 1939 and 1955 assures us of a new start – if we work toward and apply the steps and principles of the program. In the years since this foreword, the number of recovering alcoholics has multiplied by more than 10 times. If the program has worked for that vast a number of people, why, then, can’t it work for me? It can, and if I have failed in the past, it is because I failed the program and not that the program failed me. On this day when we are encouraged to let go of the old and ring in the new, my recovery somehow appropriately begins with the hope that I, too, can be in that number of recovering alcoholics. So let the new begin. And our common journey continues. Step by step.– Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

A NEW BEGINNING

The new is but the old come true; each sunrise sees a New Year born.

~ Helen Hunt Jackson ~

We know that a totally new life can begin on any day of a year, at any hour of the day, or at any moment of an hour. That new life began the moment we decided to surrender and admit to a powerlessness over a substance or an impulse. It began when we accepted the fact that we needed help and could receive it simply by asking.

Many of us used to choose New Year’s Day as a time for making good resolutions and swearing off bad habits. When we failed, we simply shrugged and said, “Maybe I can start tomorrow, next week— or next New Year’s Day.” We were always going to “turn over a new leaf.”

Now, in recovery, we no longer depend on doing it all alone. We know we can stay abstinent only by sharing with fellow members.

Let me remember, each day in recovery is another milestone. I no longer have to use a calendar.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Hope smiles on the threshold of the year to come, whispering that it will be happier.

~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson ~

At the start of this new year, we look back at what has been and we look forward to the future. Our path has been filled with healing and hope. Rewards have come to us each day. Now, looking toward the year ahead, we can’t know much of what will happen, but we can recommit ourselves to our healing and sober path. We can have renewed comfort and optimism that we will not be alone and that we will be able to handle whatever comes our way.

The start of a new year is a good time to make lists of the things we fear, the things we hope for, and the things we are grateful for. These lists serve as a kind of snapshot inventory of our attitude toward the world and our relationship with our Higher Power. They point a direction for us today and for the year ahead. We can put these lists in a safe place until next year when we will bring them out as a reminder of where we were and a measure of how far we’ve come.

Today I once again turn my life and will over to the care of God. 

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

God does not require that we be successful, only that we be faithful.

~ Mother Teresa ~

It’s probable we have never equated success with faith. Being successful meant accomplishing worthy goals and receiving the expected praise. We may have even considered that relying on faith to help us was a cop-out. Fortunately, so much about how we interpret life has changed since joining this journey through recovery.

In Step Three we learn that God wants us to have faith. We are coming to see, in fact, that acting as if we have faith begins to feel like faith. Coming to believe that God’s only expectation is that we turn within for guidance makes every circumstance far less threatening.

Practicing faith promises that we will begin to feel successful in all our experiences because we are walking through them peacefully, trusting fully that God is at hand. Believing in God, being truly faithful, can be the greatest success of our lives.

I can be faith-filled today if I turn my life and my will over to the care of God. I will remind myself of this every time I get in the “driver’s seat.”

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

It helps if I do a little at a time

When I realized I had an addiction, I felt guilty and defective. I wanted to shake off the problem right away. At first, I couldn’t stay sober for long. I’d relapse and feel guilty and weak for having failed. I couldn’t see that I was making progress.

Nowadays, I have a better perspective on the process—both on the downward and the upward spirals. I can see that it took some time for me to develop an addiction, one day at a time. And it took some time to feel so miserable that I really wanted to get clean. Likewise, it will take some time—one day at a time—to begin the changes that make for recovery. It’s no fun to live with these problems, but I am slowly accepting the fact that change does not happen overnight. The most important thing I can do is to work at making some change each and every day.

Today I will do just one thing to help my recovery progress.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Man, like the Bridge, was designed to carry the load of the moment, not the combined weight of a year at once.

~ William A. Ward ~

When trouble tumbles down on us, we are easily overwhelmed. We see problems facing us in the future, and mountains of work to do. We look at the past and see the pain and struggle of addiction. Looking at all this, we might feel despair. We can’t handle it. We want to run. Our thoughts begin to spin; we feel caught in a whirlwind. We feel we will break.

Then, softly, we hear the words of our Twelve Step program: “One day at a time.” We find we can slow down and take a moment to let the peace of our Higher Power touch us. Now we can take one small step at a time We can begin the task before us — doing the next right thing. By slowing down and taking action, we stop the spinning and find calm. We find that, like the bridge, we can handle the stress of the moment. And one day at a time, we can find serenity.

Today help me to stay focused on life, one moment at a time. Help me to hear the soft voice of recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.

~ Step One ~

A prayer is a humble and heartfelt communication with a power greater than yourself. A prayer can admit a weakness, communicate a need, or convey praise and gratitude. Prayers can unburden your heart, give you strength and courage, and deepen your faith and trust in a Higher Power. Use the following prayer as you work on your understanding and acceptance of Step One.

Step One Prayer Higher Power, I am powerless over my addiction. Addiction has controlled my life and made it unmanageable. It has had a terrible impact on my life and many others.

I am ready to let go of old patterns. I am ready to release toxicity from every facet of my life. I am open to receiving and using the tools of the program so I can take greater control of my life. Although I have felt unwilling to change in the past, I feel empowered today. I will no longer deny I have an addiction. Higher Power, I am an addict.

I ask for your help today with my addiction. I trust in your power and believe that, through your guidance, you will lead me into a true lightness of living—free at last from my addiction. Higher Power, thank you for listening.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

It is as important to relax our minds as it is to concentrate them.

~ Charles B. Newcomb ~

After a day of activity, our bodies naturally need to slow down. We yawn, our muscles stiffen, our eyes want to close. Yet our minds can be racing at top speed. How do we learn to slow down our thoughts and relax? We first need to realize we don’t have to do it all ourselves. We can ask for help from a book, a relaxation tape, a class or workshop, a movie, or music. And we can learn how to unwind from others.

For most of our lives, we learned how to be tense. Now we need to learn how to relax. Just as we didn’t learn our tension in one night, we also won’t learn relaxation in one night. But we can begin tonight to find some methods that will work for us. We can try, a little bit at a time, to become familiar with how it feels to have a more relaxed mind. Tonight can be a beginning.

Am I willing to unlearn my tensions? What resources can I use tonight to help me relax my mind?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Living today

The beginning of the New Year will often bring back sad memories. This has been the big day for hangovers, coming down, remorse, guilt, and shame. But if we stay with our new purpose—staying clean and staying close to our Higher Power—we don’t have to fear the New Year. God has forgiven our past mistakes and tomorrow is not yet here. If we do what we know is right today, all else will be taken care of.

It’s not always easy to do what is necessary today, but it’s impossible to change yesterday or to guarantee what tomorrow will bring. Our year will unfold better by living each day as it comes instead of regretting the past or anticipating the future.

Am I learning to live one day at a time?

I pray for the willingness to deal with today, instead of being obsessed with the past or the future.

My plan for living today is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Whatever happens at all happens as it should.

~ MARCUS AURELIUS ANTONINUS ~

Newcomer

I came to this meeting, but I don’t know if I belong here. I just don’t know.

Sponsor

We have a saying: “Nobody gets here by mistake.”

For many of us, this means that something inside us knows we need help and that we’re in the process of becoming willing to accept it. Some of us are drawn here thinking, at first, that we’ve come because of someone else’s problem; then we discover that we’ve also come for ourselves. Some of us sense immediately that we belong here; some come to this feeling over time; some never feel they belong. Our arriving at the first meeting can seem mysterious until we realize how unlikely it is for a person with no relationship to addiction whatsoever to show up here.

Since you can’t decide whether you belong here or not, why not stay? Consider it a gift that’s been offered you, a chance to explore your relationship to addiction. You are entitled to be here. The only “qualification” for membership is a desire to quit our addictive substance or behavior. Unless you cause a disruption, no one’s going to ask you to leave a meeting. Relax, sit back, and listen. See if you identify with any of the feelings that you hear people share, whether or not their specific life experiences mirror yours. If you keep coming, more will be revealed in time.

Today, I am where I’m supposed to be.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Without the introduction of a purpose into our lives we would be but dried-up drunks, wallowing in self-pity for the loss of that which we were forced to deny ourselves in order to bring about some semblance of order in our lives. We would be “off the bottle” but not for a moment happy about it — never with any sense of security.

We who have found AA have introduced that something into our lives that enabled us, with the Grace of God, to “fix” ourselves.

We have not given up anything — we have acquired something; we are no longer frustrated people, because we have introduced into our lives a reliance in a Power greater than ourselves, that we did not have before. That Power has opened up a new way of life, free of worry, fear and frustration.

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~ POCKET SPONSOR ~ (Back to the Basics for Addiction Recovery) ~

To earn respect, we must live responsibly. To live responsibly, we must identify and clarify our personal value system, then act on a daily basis in accordance with that value system.

Respect is for the respectable.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Serenity Prayer

God, grant me
The serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
The courage to change the things I can;
The wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardship as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life,
and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LIBERATION

There exists a mystic power that is able to transform your life so thoroughly, so radically, so completely, that when the process is completed your own friends would hardly recognize you, and, in fact, you would scarcely be able to recognize yourself.

It can lift you out of an invalid’s bed, and free you to go out into the world to shape your life as you will. It can throw open the prison door and liberate the captive.

This power can do for you that which is probably the most important thing of all in your present stage: it can find your true place in life for you, and put you into it. This power is really no less than the primal Power of Being, and to discover that Power is the divine birthright of all men, women and children.

…The Kingdom of God is within you…(Luke 17:21)

…Seek ye first the kingdom of God…and all these…things shall be added… (Mathew 6:33)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Clean Slate

Grand adventures await those who are willing to turn the corner.

~ Chinese fortune cookie ~

In the film Clean Slate, Dana Carvey portrays a man named Pogue who has an unusual type of amnesia—when he goes to sleep each night, he forgets everything that happened to him before that time. A woman who had once manipulated Pogue asks him, “Can you ever forgive me for what I did to you last week?”

In an utterly childlike way, Pogue shrugs his shoulders and answers, “Sure!” Of course he can— he doesn’t have the slightest clue what she did to him! As far as he is concerned, nothing ever happened; his relationship with her is as new as the current day.

As you enter this new year, nothing in the past has any power to affect what you do now. You are an entirely new person, different from the person you were. This year has never been lived before, and you have never had the consciousness you now have. You are setting sail on a great ad–venture determined only by how grand you are willing to think. This year, think big thoughts to create miraculous results.

I pray to start over. No matter what has happened, I am willing to let today be new. Thank you for the chance to begin again.

Today I begin anew. I see through the eyes of innocence.

[bluidkiti]

January 2

Step by Step

“I looked around me at people who seemed happy and tried to analyze their happiness, and it seemed to me that without exception these people had something or somebody they loved very much. I didn’t have the courage to love; I was not even sure I had the capacity. Fear of rejection and its ensuing pain were not to be risked, and I turned away from myself once more for the answer, this time to the drinks I had always refused before, and in alcohol I found a false courage.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Lost Nearly All,” Ch 12 (“Freedom From Bondage”), pp 546-47.

Today, …”in alcohol I found a false courage.” Whether I am far into recovery or just beginning, the time has come to be done with all that is not true. If I am hinging my sobriety on my spouse or partner not leaving me, keeping my job or convincing a judge I deserve a break from my latest DUI, my motivation to get sober is linked to something that may never happen and, if it doesn’t, my sobriety likely will not last. Whatever the untruths in my life and even in sobriety, the Fourth Step is my road map to honesty – the truth of my own life, my drinking, my recovery. May I not rely on some bottled courage as I set out to find my own truth. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

JEALOUSY

Beware of jealousy. It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock meat it feeds on.

~ Shakespeare ~

As we aim toward a lasting and comfortable recovery, we may find that jealousy and envy get in our way. Sometimes they are combined with other enemies of good living like pride, self-will, dishonesty, hatred, selfishness and resentment.

Jealousy is a danger in recovery. The kind of thinking that causes jealousy makes us believe that the world owes us much more than we are able to earn by our own best efforts.

When we envy others for what they own, for I heir standing in the community, or for the people who care about them, we are on our way to self-pity. This state of mind produces not only jealousy, depression, and an attitude that “life’s not fair,” but also anger against the world. Soon, that jealousy turn against those people most dear to us.

I am reminded that the “Big Book” calls jealousy “that most terrible of human emotions.”

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Nothing is predestined: the obstacles of your past can become gateways that lead to new beginnings.

~ Ralph Blum ~

At this doorway to a new year, we look ahead to new beginnings. In some ways, this is like any other day in the cycle of our lives. Some things we know for sure, and other things are yet to be revealed. We can know that again on this day we will stay sober and true to our path of healing and recovery. Still, we look to the year ahead with a sense of adventure. This year will be a continuing flow of experiences, and on this path we deal with each experience with the calm certainty that we are not alone. We know that we cannot control what happens to us, but we can stay true to ourselves.

“Keep coming back” is a well-known motto for our life in recovery. We are not perfect, and we don’t expect perfection of ourselves. What we expect is to keep returning to our path. Like any driver or any pilot who continuously reorients his craft as he travels along his route, we look forward to this year, knowing that we will keep returning to the true course we have chosen. It will be an adventure and we will take whatever happens and use it for our growth.

Living one day at a time, my pledge is to keep coming back to this path of renewal.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Watching a child acquire language, I realize, again, that naming things demystifies them.

~ Mary Casey ~

Sharing with another woman our fears of starting a new job, ending a relationship, getting into therapy, or even joining a social club will help us keep the fear in perspective. Fears that go undiscussed have a way of growing and overtaking our lives. In time we find that because of our shame about being afraid, we have isolated ourselves from the very people who can help us.

All of us are afraid some of the time. Our fears, however, can be managed if we use the tools found in this fellowship. Sponsors, friends, and meetings are the channels for our release from fear. Naming the fear loosens its hold on us. And equally important, we discover that others understand our fear, for they have experienced something very similar. We are not unique. That knowledge makes it easier to reveal another fear, another time.

Perhaps the best gift I can give another woman is talking with her about something I fear. Naming the fear will help me. Sharing it will help her because of the bond we will feel.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I see how writing can help

Typically I don’t like to write—I’m slow and self-conscious. I tend to worry too much about spelling and grammar and punctuation. I don’t think I write well.

But I am learning now to write for myself as part of dual recovery. When I have an upsetting thought—or a helpful one—I write it down. This helps keep my mind clear and gives my fear and pain a place to go. By jotting notes, I make a record of what I’m thinking and how I’m feeling. It helps me get to know myself better and helps me see my progress.

I will keep pen and paper handy, at home, in the car, and at work.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Every exit is an entry somewhere.

~ Tom Stoppard ~

When life asks us to give up something we value, we are always given a replacement. Our new treasure may be disguised and hard to comprehend at first, but it will come shining through if we have faith.

Life offers us choices: Do we choose to believe that the world is basically friendly — or unfriendly? Do we choose to believe that joy may grow from the depths of pain? Do we believe that life has meaning, that there are lessons to be learned from our darkest days, that growth is possible?

Choosing to develop a positive attitude about the changes and losses of life is like opening a window in April after a long winter. Moving through and out of our grief, we begin to feel a sense of hope and direction. We begin to believe that one day, we will come to live without pain as a constant companion.

Sometimes an ounce of guts and courage is all we can cling to in the midst of personal storms. Our willingness to keep going is the quiet act of faith that takes us to a place where we feel safe to open up and trust again.

Today let me trust that God’s will is for me to ha happy.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn’t mean the circus has left town.

~ George Carlin ~

A new year holds promise and provides a “second chance.” A new year also can be a time when you see all that you have yet to accomplish and question your ability to face those challenges. You may think it was hard enough to admit you needed to stop your addictive behaviors and even harder to stay focused on recovery. To know that a new year heralds the continued need to stay on the same path can seem daunting.

Make this year different. Resolve to look within you, at what you can and need to do for yourself, and to look outside you, at what you can do for others. While self- awareness is key to your recovery, remember that recovery is both a hand reaching out and a hand being grasped.

Recovery does not happen in isolation. One of the strengths of the program is interdependence and fellow-ship. Attending to your needs as well as to the needs of others can provide you with renewed energy to recover from your past, commitment to stay focused on the present, and the ability to foresee a future that holds hope and promise.

I will awaken each day to a new beginning—not just for myself, but also for others.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

But where was I to start? The world is so vast, I shall start with the country I knew best, my own. But my country is so very large. I had better start with my town. But my town, too, is large. I had best start with my street. No, my home. No, my family. Never mind, I shall start with myself.

~ Elie Wiesel ~

How many times have we tried to change things outside of ourselves, like a parent, a loved one, a drinking or drug-using pattern, or a boss? Perhaps we felt if we changed someone or something, we would be better off. But we soon discovered we were powerless to change people, places, or things.

All we can change is ourselves. Yet we can’t do that by five-minute overhauls. Nor can we go to bed at night and expect to wake up the next day as the person we always wanted to be.

We need to keep it simple as we change ourselves. We need to start slowly. If we imagine ourselves as a big puzzle with many pieces, we may understand we can only see our whole selves by joining together one piece at a time.

Did I try to change others today? How can I keep it simple as I try to change myself—just a little bit at a time?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Letting go of results

Some of us are familiar with the saying “Plan plans, not results.” For those of us with addictive or compulsive personalities this is a very important message. Our heads can spin so much with the results we plan for tomorrow that we forget what we need to do for a good life today.

If we “plan” to have a partner, $5,000 in the bank, and a new home by this time next year, chances are we will blow it. We know from experience that if we take that first fix, pill, or drink we will have nothing at this time next year.

Do I know how to plan well?

I pray to do the necessary footwork today and leave the results with my Higher Power.

The results I will leave to God today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

We know the truth, not only by the reason, but by the heart.

~ BLAISE PASCAL ~

Newcomer

I’m not sure I qualify to be in this program. I wasn’t that bad—I hear stories that are so much worse than mine.

Sponsor

There’s a joke about a group of friends standing at their drinking buddy’s graveside with his widow, all of them shaking their heads and saying, “I don’t understand it—he wasn’t that bad.”

Who qualifies for a Twelve Step program? The answer doesn’t he simply in the quantities of a substance consumed or in the frequency of an unwanted behavior. More telling is whether or not we have a choice. It’s useful to make a list of times we remember using in spite of intentions not to and a list of times when using took us places we never meant to go, made us do things we never meant to do. Perhaps we’ll recall many such situations, perhaps only a few. The number is less important than our willingness to look back at our memories, and the feelings accompanying them, without censoring ourselves. Something inside us brought us here; it’s up to each of us to take an honest look at what that was.

Today, I look honestly at times when I have been powerless over this addiction. I acknowledge the ways it has made my life unmanageable.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Probably in the history of the world no tyrant can be found who welded chains so strong upon his victims as did that “01′ Debil Rum.”

Even our most secret desires were controlled by his influence, and our families, our health and our very lives themselves were disregarded when opposed to the demands for a drink.

Fortunately for us in AA we still had a freedom of choice of master and when we decided to “turn our will and our lives over to the care of God”, we accepted a new Master, one even more demanding than the first, but with this one vast difference — our chains were now bonds of love.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) If you want to get maximum attention make a big mistake.

2) Self-will can get you what you want right now, God’s will can provide what you need for eternity.

3) If the newcomer could see no joy in our existence they would not want it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Lord’s Prayer

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name.
Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
For Thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory, forever and ever.
Amen.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE POWER WITHIN

But where is this wonderful Power to be contacted? The answer is simple—this Power is to be found within your own consciousness, the last place that most people would look for it. Within your own mentality there lies a source of energy stronger than electricity, more potent than high explosive; unlimited and inexhaustible. You only need to make conscious contact with it to set it working in your affairs. This Indwelling Power, the Inner Light, is spoken of in the Bible as a child. The conscious discovery by you that you have this Power within you, and your determination to make use of it, is the birth of the child.

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The Mighty God, The Everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6)

This is a marvelous description of what happens when the spiritual idea, the Child,
is born to the soul. Walking in darkness, moral or physical, dwelling in the land of the shadow of death–the death of joy, or hope, or even self-respect—describes well the condition of many people before this light shines into their weary, heartbroken lives; and the Prophet rises into a paean of exultant joy as he contemplates the deliverance.

The people that walked in darkness have seen a great light; they that dwell in the land of the shadow of death, upon them hath the light shined (Isaiah 9:2)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Act Now

There are two fatal errors that keep great projects from coming to life:

1. Not finishing
2. Not starting

~ Buddha ~

While living at a farming community, our group planned to erect a new house. For many months, we discussed the plans, and because we did not fully agree, nothing was done. Then one day, one man went out to the building site with a plumb line and began to hammer stakes into the ground. It wasn’t long before the house was built.

You can think and talk about a project for a long time, but only action will manifest it. If you wait until you’re ready, you’ll never get anything done. Don’t wait until all the conditions are perfect for you to begin. Beginning makes the conditions perfect.

Work through my hands to bring about the things that will serve You.

I step forward with the trust that Spirit is moving through me to create good.

[bluidkiti]

January 3

Step by Step

“We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the first step in recovery. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at times that we were regaining control, but such intervals – usually brief – were inevitably followed by still less control, which led in time to pitiful and incomprehensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness. Over any considerable period, we get worse, never better.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 3 (“More About Alcoholism”), p 30.

Today, conceding to “our innermost selves” that we are alcoholic is the first step in recovery. Without that admission, every attempt to stop drinking is doomed to failure: our private drinking histories are mute testimony to that. But if we can finally admit to ourselves that we are alcoholic, the answer to the next logical question – Why do I have to quit altogether instead of cutting back? – is obvious: alcoholism is a progressive condition that is never cured and, when fed, gets worse. But alcoholism can be arrested, and the only guaranteed method is total abstinence. Today, if I still struggle that the drinking problem I clearly have has progressed into alcoholism, I have to retreat within my innermost self in absolute honesty and, if I acknowledge the obvious answer, AA awaits me, just for the asking. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

GIVE WITH HUMILITY

The greatest pleasure I know is to do a good act in secret and have it found out by accident.

~ Anonymous ~

There is one bit of advice that is given in many ways to those of us in recovery. That advice is that we should give to others without looking for any credit for our generosity. To give something for the sheer joy of giving is the strongest step we can take in achieving the humility that is so vital to us. Humility is essential to our spiritual progress, and our spiritual progress is a necessary part of our recovery.

The encouragement to serve without seeking praise comes to us in many forms and many places. Ancient wisdom advises us not to let our right hand know what our left hand is doing, and not to “sound a trumpet” to announce a good deed.

Let me learn to give without seeking credit. This is a humble act. It will result in the uplifting reward of humility which is vital to my spiritual growth.

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

A marriage without conflicts is almost as inconceivable as a nation without crises.

~ Andre Maurois ~

Conflict is not bad; it is necessary. In any good, intimate partnership, the two people reveal themselves to each other. As they reveal themselves, their differences sometimes are interesting and enjoyable and sometimes create conflict. A good conflict is open and honest and without ego. When one person reveals his or her thoughts, the other person listens and hears them as a genuine expression that must be taken into account. The simple act of listening is usually most important; agreement isn’t always necessary. Most of the time, a person just wants to be heard. Agreement is required when there is only one path that can be chosen. Then, the wisdom of two loving and honest people can lead to a mutual agreement that often turns out to be better than either individual path.

The true, unique nature of any intimate partnership only takes shape through genuine conflict and resolution. Crises faced and resolved become the foundation for continuing and deepening mutual understanding and intimacy.

Today I will not avoid conflict but will face it with honesty and an open heart

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Happiness consists of a solid faith, good health, and a bad memory.

~ Clare Boothe Luce ~

Resentments are guaranteed to hinder our growth. We can never know full happiness when resentment clouds our vision. Why is it so hard for us to “forget” the small injuries of life? We have never been promised freedom from pain. Many of the lessons we are destined to learn will scuff our egos. But we will know happiness, completely, if we free our minds of resentments.

The formula for happiness is simple. We don’t need material wealth, a perfect job, or an exceptional relationship. In fact, it’s possible to know happiness with no job, very little money, and no significant other. Happiness is a by-product of a healthy attitude. And a healthy attitude is one that takes the normal turmoil of life and mixes it with a belief in God’s presence. The result is an acceptance of God’s will and a certainty that, in spite of appearances, all is well.

I am in charge of my attitude today. Happiness is a choice I can make regardless of what the people around me are doing.

© 1994 by Hazelden Foundation

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am doing the best I can

I expected things to just fall into place once I accepted my problems, stopped using, and got into therapy. But that’s not the case. Even though I’m abstinent now and going to weekly therapy and Twelve Step meetings, my psychiatric symptoms have gotten out of hand. Something is not working or I’m doing something wrong.

But actually, that’s not all bad. In the process of figuring out what led up to the relapse, I’ve learned another lesson in recovery: I can’t change myself overnight and willpower alone just doesn’t work. I need to learn more about my dual disorder, as well as how it affects myself and others. I need to learn ways to cope. If I accept myself and this subtle, slow process, I will recover, little by little, one day at a time.

I will write out an affirmation that reads: “I am doing the right things. I am doing the best I can.”

***********************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Should you shield the valleys from the windstorms, you would never see the beauty of their canyons.

~ Elisabeth Kubler-Ross ~

Time teaches us about the twofold connection of suffering and wisdom. For every loss, we’ve gained something new. We are learning that our pain makes us wise over time, but while we are in its midst we often feel alone and entrapped. We sometimes can make no sense out of our suffering — neither its depth nor its seeming unfairness — and we may even turn our backs on our Higher Power. We’ve only survived the darkness by stumbling through it each day. But in recovery we have gradually allowed ourselves to accept comfort from others, and their words help us in times of desolation.

We are learning that some pains can’t be healed, but instead must be endured until they run their course. Sometimes the only hope we have is the deep knowledge that our Higher Power will give us no more than we can handle today. With His help and comfort, we can endure and find peace.

Today let me trust that — even though it may feel painful — my recovery has begun.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

If your mental attitude is right, if you face life the right way, if the right spirit is in you, if you put yourself in tune, everything you do… will give you a real sense of pleasure.

~ Orison Swett Marden ~

Start your day with poise and serenity. If your alarm doesn’t go off, you can remain calm. If a traffic jam slows your commute, you can be at peace. If a friend cancels on you, you can be forgiving.

You can do all these things when you decide “I will not allow anything to disturb my mental balance or throw my mind out of its serenity.” Facing life with inner strength means not allowing people, places, or things to destroy your harmony with the world. Facing life with peace of mind means you are in charge of your destiny and your recovery. Facing life with understanding and forgiveness means you have built a strong relationship with a Higher Power. Then you can view disruptions to your well-being and purpose as trifling, small incidents that are short-lived.

Today you can choose to be defeated by life’s little in-sensibilities, conflicts, and disappointments, or success-fully handle whatever comes your way without disruption to your inner peace.

My achievements today will reflect my attitude. I will choose to face life with a serene spirit and calm poise.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Strange feelings. . . . Just a sort of unexplained sadness that comes each afternoon when the new day is gone forever and there’s nothing ahead but increasing darkness.

~ Robert M. Pirsig ~

Just as each day is a new beginning, so is each night also a new start. Each night can be a chance to recharge ourselves after our day’s batteries have run down. Each night can be a chance to start anew on our goals, our growth, our good thoughts.

Instead of reflecting on the past events of the day, we can look forward to the moments to come. We can be unafraid of the darkness of the night as we prepare for tomorrow by using positive energy.

Although the day is done, tomorrow is yet to come. There are plans to make, places to go, people to see, and projects to do. Tomorrow can begin with hope and strength and energy directed to all our forthcoming events.

I can see tomorrow as a new beginning.

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Asking how

Many days we are tempted to ask Why? Why did this happen to me? Why was I singled out? Why am I not a different person? But the whys lead only to clever explanations and rationalizations of what we do or what we are. The question for us is not Why? but How?

We ask how to learn and work our program of recovery; the “how” can give us a deeper understanding of the program. We ask God How? and God provides the strength and guidance needed. “How” will lead to everything needed for recovery and personal growth. “Why” is irrelevant.

Am I learning how to live?

Higher Power, teach me how to live, love, and learn.

Today I will ask how to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

A man takes a drink, the drink takes another, and the drink takes the man.

~ SINCLAIR LEWIS ~

Newcomer

I’ve heard Alcoholics Anonymous members say, “It’s the first drink that gets you drunk,” and Overeaters Anonymous members say, “Don’t take that first compulsive bite.” It seems a little extreme. Don’t Twelve Step programs allow for the possibility of doing things in moderation?

Sponsor

There are numerous stories of addicted people who started with the idea that they’d have “just one” of whatever it was. Hours, days, or weeks later, they were still in the middle of a binge. Most of us, when we were active in our addictions, promised ourselves repeatedly that we’d be moderate, though we’d already accumulated plenty of evidence that we lacked the desire and the capacity for moderation. Once we started using, no matter how seemingly insignificant the beginning, we were under the control of our addiction. We experienced a craving that no quantity of a drug or repetition of an addictive behavior could satisfy.

There are people on this planet who leave wine unfinished in their glasses and food uneaten on their plates. There are people who can do in moderation what people filling the seats at meetings couldn’t stop doing, once they started. But we are not those people. If we’ve suffered from an addiction enough to come here for treatment, why would we want to keep playing with denial?

Today, I’m strengthened by accepting my need to take special measures to protect my health and recovery.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

You can’t tell a drunk anything, but you can show him. All too frequently, we cry out on Monday, attend our first meeting on Tuesday and try our hand at Twelve Stepping on Wednesday.

With a sketchy conception of what it is all about, with little or no knowledge of the Program, sometimes with the smell of paraldehyde still on our breath, we venture forth to dry up the world and when we fail we wonder why.

Remember the 12th step says, “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics.” You can’t carry the message before you receive it nor can you give it if you don’t possess it.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real.

2) What you resist persists.

3) Life does not begin at any particular age, but only when you decide to live it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace!
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
Where there is injury, pardon.
Where there is doubt, faith.
Where there is despair, hope.
Where there is darkness, light.
Where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console.
To be understood as to understand.
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive.
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.
It is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

LET GOD HAVE YOUR BURDEN

Once you have contacted the Power within, and have allowed it to take over your responsibilities for you, it will direct and govern all your affairs from the greatest to the least, without mistakes. The government shall be upon his shoulder. You are tired, and driven, and worried, and weak, and ill, and depressed, because you have been trying to carry the government upon your own shoulder; the burden is too much for you, and you have broken down under it. Now, immediately you hand over your self-government, that is, the burden of making a living, or of healing your body, or erasing your mistakes, to the Child. He, the Tireless One, the All-Powerful, the All-Wise, the All-Resourceful, assumes it with joy; and your difficulties have seen the beginning of the end.

Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee… (Psalm 55:22)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Grow with the Flow

I said to a man who stood at the gate of the year:
“Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”
And he replied, “Go out into the darkness and
put your hand in the hand of God. That shall be to you
better than a light and safer than a known way.”

~ Quoted by King George VI of England ~

Two men were walking beside a river on their way to a town downstream when a storm broke, and a flash flood washed both men into the river. One man panicked, tried to fight his way back to shore, and drowned. The other man realized that the torrent was beyond his control and relaxed to the best of his ability, letting the river carry him. To his happy surprise, the river deposited him on the banks of the town he was headed toward, in a much shorter time than it would have taken him to walk.

When you come up against a situation you cannot control, trust that the universe is working on your behalf. When we fight what is, we lose our power. The sage capitalizes on the energy at hand and makes it work on his behalf.

Help me to remember that You are present in all situations, guiding me home even when I cannot see how.

I am always in the presence of love.
Everything that happens to me is a part of the plan for my good.

[bluidkiti]

January 4

Step by Step

” …(O)ur problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 7 (“Working With Others”), p 103.

Today, the fights have been many, the injuries deep and some scars permanent. Lies have been bountiful, hurt to myself and others indelible, and the fun ceased long ago if it ever was fun at all. Enough is enough. To continue as is, is a spiral downward into a pit from which there may be no escape; to change course now, hope prevails. Today is the day I begin to answer what exists in my emotional and spiritual psyche that is fueled by alcoholic drinking, and I have grown tired of “fighting anybody or anything.” My hope cannot be in my own will power; it is as mythical as the magical unicorn. Hope now falls on AA and my commitment to honestly and diligently working its steps and principles. There, I have no reason to fight anyone and anything – other than my own resistance to surrender completely. Today, enough is enough; I surrender. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

HELPING OTHERS

Gratitude should go forward, rather than backward.

~ Bill W. ~

When we realize how much the Pro-gram and others have helped us, it becomes our responsibility to help others. Our Twelfth Step suggests we carry the message to those who still suffer. Many of our fellows are also suffering in recovery. We need to remember to help those who may need our Fellowship as well as those in our Fellowship.

Life is no longer a dead end without hope. With the gifts we have received from the Program, we are able to help others. Our spiritual progress is easily measured by our positive actions. We are only asked to be helpful and leave the results to our Higher Power.

Bill W. said, “If you carry the message to still others, you will be making the best possible repayment for the help given you.” I want to give back what I have received by sharing the Program with others.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Be patient with everyone| but above all with yourself.

~ Saint Francis de Sales ~

The path of healing and recovery sets challenging standards. We are asked to “turn our will and our lives over,” to be “searching and fearless” in our moral inventory, and to make amends to all those we have harmed. Many of us have lifelong habits of over- criticizing ourselves and condemning ourselves for who we are. When we face challenging standards, we can’t meet them perfectly. This is a program of progress, not perfection.

If we are not seeking to attain perfection, then, we need to deepen our understanding of what we are seeking. The answer is in the slogan “Keep coming back.” It’s a slogan usually applied to the idea of continuing to return to meetings, even if we don’t see our way clearly at first. But it also applies to meeting standards. We don’t seek perfection; we seek to keep coming back to the Steps of recovery because it is a given that we will keep falling off them. It is only when we stop returning to the Steps that we get seriously off track.

Today I will be patient with my progress on this healing journey.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Each of my days are miracles. I won’t waste my day; I won’t throw away a miracle.

~ Kelley Vickstrom ~

It’s so easy to forget to be grateful for our many blessings. We may take our freedom from the compulsion to drink or use for granted. Having learned to monitor our behavior and change it when necessary, we seldom treasure this skill as an asset.

The rut of complacency claims all of us at one time or another. And our complacency can lead us to the stinking thinking that’s only a step away from drinking or using or some other compulsive behavior. Having sponsors point out our complacency may irritate us, but it may also save our lives.

Practicing gratitude will keep us aware of the small and large miracles that we have experienced on this recovery journey: We remember where we were last night (thanks to the clear vision of abstinence). We have reconciled with family members.

In fact, we are walking miracles, and God has a plan for the rest of our lives. Let’s be ready for it.

I will try to be attentive to every moment of today, knowing that each experience is part of the miracle of my life.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am no longer denying my feelings

I used to use chemicals all the time to forget my feelings—loneliness, anxiety, dread. Anytime I had strong or painful feelings, I promptly got high. In fact, I tried to make sure I was high much of the time, to make sure no painful feelings could creep in.

Now in dual recovery, I am changing. I am practicing living with my feelings—some of which I still don’t want; many of which I didn’t realize I had. Sometimes I still get overwhelmed. But in a way, I’m grateful for my emotions. As painful or frightening as they are at times, I am getting to know myself better and I like who I am learning to see.

I will keep a “feelings log” today. I’ll jot down my strong feelings and note any people involved.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Draw from others the lesson that may profit yourself.

~ Terence ~

Our Twelve Step program offers us the best education in the world, free of charge. Everybody in recovery has something to teach us, if we’ll listen. Each of us has a unique set of experiences and background, problems and solutions to share. From each other we can learn about recovery, and about the world, too. We can hear what it’s like to live on the streets, even if we didn’t lose everything to addiction. We can learn how others got their families involved in a Twelve Step program of their own. We can learn about the problems we may encounter at work, how to avoid them, and how to solve them. We can hear from someone who has been there, rather than through relapse, how it feels to be addicted to another substance.

The experience of others gives us a rare chance to broaden our horizons. We can learn how it feels to be a member of a minority, how to love ourselves enough to combat hatred, how to triumph from adversity. Most important, by listening to others with respect and love, we can learn to truly value other people, even those who are different from us.

Today help me appreciate the teachings of my Twelve Step program. Help me continue to learn.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

You cannot weave truth in a loom of lies.

~ Suzette Haden Elgin ~

Before you admitted you were powerless, you may have created a false reality that enabled you to see yourself as you wanted to be and validated the lies you fabricated. The worse your addiction became, the more lies you may have told and the more you repressed the truth—until eventually the lies became the truth.

Honesty is not simply the absence of lying, but the commitment to truthfulness. The program teaches you the difference between being honest and being rigorously honest. Admitting you are powerless over your addiction is being honest.

But rigorous honesty means living each day with total awareness of what is true and what is untrue, and speaking always to the truth, no matter how painful. As you go to meetings, be inspired by the honesty of others. As you work with your sponsor, learn how to view your past actions and behaviors with an objective eye. As you read and reflect upon the teachings of the Big Book, gain a greater understanding about the importance of honesty with yourself and others. As you follow the Steps, seek total honesty with yourself. As you connect with your Higher Power, learn how honesty can lead to forgiveness.

Today I will be honest with myself and with others.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Happiness is not pleasure. Happiness is victory.

~ Zig Ziglar ~

Many people believe happiness is measured in material terms: a house, money, lots of clothes. Others believe it’s found in enjoyable moments: a sunset, dinner with friends, a walk in the woods. Although happiness is all these things, it’s also the feeling we get when we have achieved something we’ve longed for and worked hard for. Happiness can be a personal victory.

To be victorious doesn’t mean we have to win. It can mean we’ve gone beyond an expected outcome and gained more than we hoped for. There have been times when we’ve experienced victory: passing a test, buying our first car, graduating from college, landing a job, living on our own. But all victories don’t have to be big. They can be as small and insignificant as losing a few pounds, going a few hours without a drink or other drug, not arguing with a family member, or taking an hour for ourselves.

Big or small, our victories are our happiness. Each one shows us we can do what we set out to do. Each helps build confidence in our abilities and is a boon to inn self-esteem. With each victory, we can be assured there will be another.

I can be happy for all my victories.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Learning new ways

Once we make a connection with our Higher Power, the ongoing problem is to hold on to it. Repeatedly we slip into our old ways of thinking and behaving. If not curtailed, eventually these will lead us back to that first fix, pill, or drink. We need only a word, thought, or familiar situation to get caught up again in an old habit.

We have to discover (and rediscover) that the old way of life has become impossible and the new one essential. We do this—and do it again—by praying, meditating, and working the Twelve Steps of recovery.

Am I living the program?

Higher Power, help me avoid being smug and complacent in my new life. Remind me that old ways of living have become impossible for me.

The new ways of living that I will cultivate today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Later is now.

~ ROSEANNE BARR ~

Newcomer

I guess I do have some addiction problems, but right now is a terrible time for me. I know you’d like me to be more involved, use the program more, but I need time—there’s something else I have to deal with first. I’ve tried talking about it at meetings, but no one really has much understanding of my particular problem.

Sponsor

I do respect the fact that there are pressing problems in your life and that you are going to have to face them. Addiction is, in one sense, a response to underlying issues we all have to deal with. And in addition to our inner problems, many of us enter recovery in the midst of some crisis—serious illness, separation, overdue taxes, even homelessness are situations some of us have had to face while newly recovering. I agree that your problems are real ones. But putting off recovery is not likely to help you with them. It may make things worse.

While I may not be able to help with the specifics of your situation, I can be here to share my experience, strength, and hope as a person in recovery. Recovery is the foundation of my life today. I make it my highest priority, and as time goes on I find the help and strength I need to resolve everything else I have to deal with. If you, too, have the willingness to face your addiction and show up for your recovery, I’m willing to be here.

Today, I let go of all obstacles to recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Pride in ancestry has kept many alcoholics from the humbleness that is a prime requisite of success in our pro-gram. The deeper one is in his cups, the greater is his remorse for his condition — not because of his descent to the level of the animal, but because of his betrayal of his noble family traditions.

Ancestry is good only when it in-spires living up to its traditions. When it becomes a throne built on other men’s accomplishments it is nothing.

We alcoholics should be reminded of Voltaire’s words when he said: “He who serves well has no need of ancestors.”

Let us think less of our ancestors and more about what kind of ancestors we will make.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) We never obsess about anything good.

2) Insanity is repeating the same mistakes over and over again and expecting different results.

3) Self-will cannot be overcome by Self-will.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Today’s Thought

I am but one, but I am one;
I can’t do everything,
But I can do SOMETHING;
What I can do, I ought to do,
What I ought to do, God helping me,
I WILL DO.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

A NEW BIRTH

The prophet Isiah speaks of the “Name” of the Child and if we know something of Bible symbolism, we know that we are now going to learn something fundamental, for in the Bible, the name of anything means the character or nature of that thing. A name is not merely an arbitrary label, but actually a hieroglyph of the soul. We are given no less than five names of qualities of the Child.

First Isiah says that the name of the Child is Wonderful. The word wonderful used here requires careful scrutinization. As employed in the Bible, it implies a miracle—just that, and nothing less. The Bible repeatedly says that miracles can happen, and it gives detailed and circumstantial accounts of many specific cases. Moreover, it says that miracles always will happen if you believe them to be possible, and are willing to recognize the power of God, and to call upon it.

As soon as the Child is born in your consciousness, the miracle will come into your life. This does not mean simply that you well become resigned to your present circumstances, or that you will then be enabled to meet the same difficulties with a higher courage or a clearer brain. It means the miracle.

But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

May I Feed You?

Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinion of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth.

~ Katherine Mansfield ~

Waiting for the airplane to take off, I was happy to get a seat by myself. Just then, a flight attendant approached me and asked, “Would you mind changing your seat? A couple would like to sit together.” The only other available seat was next to a woman with both arms in casts, a black-and-blue face, and a gloomy aura. No way am I going to sit there, was my immediate thought. But then a deeper, quieter voice spoke, “Opportunity.” I took my new seat and discovered that Kathy had been in an auto collision, and she was on her way for therapy

When the snack of nuts and juice arrived, it did not take me long to realize that Kathy would not be able to feed herself. I considered offering to feed her but resisted, as it seemed too intimate a service to offer to a stranger. But then I decided that Kathy’s need was more important than my discomfort. I offered to help her eat, and although she too was un–comfortable about accepting, she did. The experience was exhilarating, and she and I grew close in a short period of time. By the end of the five-hour trip, my heart was fully alive, and the time was infinitely better spent than if I had just sat by myself.

I was very glad I had reached beyond my comfort zone to sit next to Kathy and feed her. Love always flows beyond human borders and dis–solves the fears that keep us separate. When we stretch to serve another, we grow to live in a larger, more rewarding world.

Help me move beyond the small self so I can connect with the hearts of others.

When I give love to another. I feed my own soul.

[bluidkiti]

January 5

Step by Step

“There is a solution. Almost none of us like the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of shortcomings which the process requires for its successful consummation. But we saw that it really worked in others, and we had to come to believe in the hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at our feet.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 2 (“There Is a Solution”), p 25.

Today, if I cannot or am not ready to surrender to a spiritual being and experience, let me begin or renew my sobriety and recovery by looking to my peers who have not only sobered up but have undergone a personality and an emotional overhaul. If I cannot understand that something good can be stronger than me is similar in comparison to alcohol being more powerful than me, let me understand that the process of recovery is an evolutionary one and that the spiritual concept of the program is not a prerequisite to begin the process. Let me believe today that the spiritual awakening or experience promised me by the program may yet to be, if it hasn’t already and if I do not recognize it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

MUSTS

Not what we would, but what we must, makes up the sum of living.

~ Richard Henry Stoddard ~

“We must do the things we must” is frequent advice in the Program. Each Step is evidence of what our founders did in order to achieve abstinence and keep it going with serenity and security. All of the musts” implied in the Steps and frequently mentioned throughout the Big Book are also spiritual. We will find the importance of “must” in the favorite quotes from that book.

The Steps aren’t based on the theory of “thou shalt not.” They are based on the theory that “thou shall.” That’s why we say “there are no musts” in our Program.

Fortunately, those Twelve Steps we work require positive action. They tell us what we can do in order that each of us can live a joyous, happy, and free existence.

“Must” appears many times in the Big Book, along with a few “absolutes.” This doesn’t refer to my requirements for working the Program. It just lets me concentrate on what I can do, not on what I can’t

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.

~ Hal Borland ~

In the midst of winter, the short days and the long nights may seem to last forever. But we know that the turn of the cycle is inevitable. Every winter is followed by spring. When we feel depressed and discouraged, we may not feel optimistic about anything. We may not see the path from here to a place where life feels brighter and warmer. That is when we must remind ourselves that all things eventually change. We do find life beyond our current problems. We do regain our energy and our joy in life.

All pain is finite. It has its beginning and its end. Our path may require us to learn to endure and live with some pain. Some Native Americans’ training for youth included fasting and solitary journeys that strengthened them and showed them how to deal with shortage and difficulty. Life must contain dark times, and when we learn that we can carry on until we find light, we have something permanent to fall back on. While we may feel pessimistic, we can remind ourselves that it is only a feature of our current mood, not a permanent state.

Today I live in the knowledge that spring is eternal.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

It is important that we plan for the future, imperative that we accept an outcome unplanned.

~ Molly McDonald ~

We sometimes feel confused over how to live just one day at a time while making strategic plans for the future. It seems contradictory to try to do both. Yet that is what a healthy recovery means.

Goals help direct our attention. They give us needed focus. They give us enthusiasm for making the most of our recovery. But just as we need goals to strengthen our resolve to move forward, we need willingness to let God be involved in our effort and, even more important, in charge of the outcome. God’s role and ours, though related, are in fact quite separate. In our rush to move forward we sometimes forget to turn over the reins when our part is done.

We are learning the joys of living one day at a time. We are letting God be responsible for the outcomes of our endeavors. Each day in recovery gives us more time to practice doing only what we need to do and leaving the rest in God’s hands.

I must let God take charge of the outcomes of my efforts today. If I do, I will be cared for in the most loving fashion.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am learning to ask for help

Some months before I finally got diagnosed (accurately) with a dual disorder, I knew I had a problem—maybe two problems. I could see that using chemicals wasn’t helping my intense and disturbing moods. In fact, chemicals were becoming a separate problem. Yet I was afraid (ashamed?) to talk to anyone. I couldn’t ask for help, not for a long time.

Just by entering recovery, but especially by going to therapy and Step meetings, I’ve come to see that asking for help is a very good thing. It means I know something is wrong and that I can’t fix it alone (Steps One and Two). Asking for help suggests that I’m willing to trust a power greater than myself (Step Three).

I will ask a recovering friend to call me tonight to ask me how I’m feeling.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Making prompt amends is the fresh air of each new day.

~ Sandra Little ~

Today brings us a new hill to climb and a new view from the top. Taking time to reflect about our daily journeys is a challenging adventure in self- discovery. Looking down, we see our past trials and difficulties as lessons to learn from. Letting go of old baggage as we end our day will give us a bright window to open onto tomorrow.

Completing a daily inventory creates a good foundation for living peacefully. Honestly acknowledging the things we have done or said to hurt ourselves or others enables us to say, “I’m sorry” and to begin each day with a clean slate and a peaceful heart. As we empty ourselves of regret by making amends to ourselves and others, we make room for the love and comfort of our Higher Power.

Today help me take inventory and make amends where I need to.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We should think seriously before we slam doors, before we bum bridges, before we saw off the limb on which we find ourselves sitting.

~ Richard L. Evans ~

Sometimes you may feel as if you are at war with yourself and others. Conflict is created by the simple fact that you made the decision to no longer engage in your addiction. So it is not unusual to resent those who seem to have it all together. Such feelings can build into self-directed anger or anger toward others.

Acting upon your anger rarely leads to any good. You may say things that cause others to distance themselves from you, or make poor decisions that take considerable effort to undo. You may lash out at yourself in ways that disrupt your sense of serenity and put your recovery at risk.

What matters most is not the situation you are presented with, but the way you handle it. Rather than lash out in anger, ask, “What can I do to create greater harmony within myself?” You can achieve greater peace and serenity by talking through your anger with a trusted friend, sharing your feelings at a meeting, and using prayer and meditation to calm yourself.

“When one door closes, another opens.” Today I will see everything as a positive opportunity for learning and growth.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

You will forget your misery; you will remember it as waters that have passed away.

~ Job 11:16 ~

Many of us have painful memories we carry with us like pictures in a wallet. We keep these memories alive through feelings generated by those moments. Why are we so attached to unpleasant memories?

It’s difficult to let go of memories, no matter how unpleasant. Sometimes they’re a reminder of the past, but more often we clutch them because we’re afraid to feel pleasant feelings today. Because the program is working in our lives, we have fewer painful times now. That may not be comfortable, so we invent new pain or dredge up the sludge of the past. As ugly as it may be, it’s still familiar.

Tonight we don’t have to look back. We don’t have to feel misery or pain because it’s familiar. We don’t have to drag out that wallet and look at the images of unhappy times again. Tonight we can leave those spaces in our wallets empty, ready to be filled with new moments to remember.

I can try to make some new moments to remember. I don’t need to look back anymore.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being able to be wrong

We had to compete with everyone, some-times subtly, sometimes less subtly. We al-ways had to be right; to be wrong seemed unbearable. We could never seem to bring ourselves to say simply, “I was wrong.” We were afraid of what would happen to us if we did. Our egos were very fragile; we were never as strong as we had led ourselves to believe.

We came to discover, however, that real strength comes from being able to be wrong and from being willing to change our ways of thinking and living.

Can I face being wrong and learn from it?

Higher Power, help me realize each day that it is okay to be wrong, that real communication with other people depends on my being willing to see other points of view, and that being teachable is a divine quality.

Today I will handle being wrong by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Life is not made up of yesterdays only.

~ CARL JUNG ~

Newcomer

I heard a bunch of jargon at the meeting I went to last night. I didn’t understand any of it. What does “ninety in ninety” mean?

Sponsor

I can understand your bewilderment at unfamiliar program phrases and customs. In the beginning, it may feel as if we’re participating in a culture that’s new to us. I’m glad I can help, and if I’m not here to translate, almost anyone you see at a meeting would be happy to explain unfamiliar expressions.

“Ninety in ninety” is an abbreviated way of saying, “Go to ninety meetings in ninety days.” One of the strongest suggestions this program makes to newcomers is to attend a meeting every day for at least the first three months. Intermittent attendance, a few meetings here or there, won’t provide enough information about whether we belong here or not. Ninety days of meetings can make it clear.

At first, it may sound like a lot. But when we think of the time we have given to our addiction—pursuing it, trying to control it, acting on it, feeling sick and guilty about it- then an hour or an hour and a half doesn’t seem like too much of a commitment. Meetings create a sense of belonging to a community and a solid basis of support over time. It’s such a good use of time: an hour in a room with my peers gives me a reserve of strength and hope for an entire day.

Today, I am part of a community of people in recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Living all the days of our lives, living them to their utmost; putting all our life into them; getting all the life that each day has to offer; this truly is living at its best, at its fullest.

Every day, then, will be fully lived — a grand succession of experiences both pleasant and unpleasant (for life is made up of both), and without the one the other would not be recognized or appreciated.

Live each day as though it were your last day on earth.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) If you can’t get what you want, learn to want what you get.

2) FEAR: False Expectations Appearing Real

3) When the horse dies, dismount.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Sanskrit Proverb

Look to this day,
For it is life,
The very life of life.
In its brief course lies all
The realities and verities of existence,
The bliss of growth,
The splendor of action,
The glory of power.
For yesterday is but a dream,
And tomorrow is only a vision.
But today, well lived,
Makes every yesterday a dream of happiness
And every tomorrow a vision of hope.
Look well, therefore, to this day.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

YOUR COUNSELOR

The prophet Isaiah also calls this Child “Counselor.” A counselor is one who gives guidance. If you are worried because do not know whether to take some important step, to accept a business offer, to sign an important document, to enter upon a partnership, to resign your position, to trust someone, to say something, the Child will be your Counselor.

In the third place the prophet reveals to us who the child really is. It is no less than god Himself, “The Mighty God.” And truly the mystic Power that transforms, and transmutes, is God Himself, always present with you, and always available.

… the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works (John 14:10)

Read John 14:10-17

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Be Firm

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

~ Yogi Berra ~

I was struck by an unusual ad in the classified section of the local newspaper: “Dodge truck for sale. $5,000 firm or best offer.” Was the price firm, or was the seller willing to negotiate? Apparently he couldn’t make up his mind.

Life will support us in our decisions, but we have to make a decision around which the universe can gather. Often it is better to make a wrong decision than no decision. If you make an error, you can either correct it or learn from it; in either case you will move ahead. If you make no decision, you will likely remain just where you are.

A friend of mine had an inspiring bumper sticker on her washing ma–chine: Sin Boldly. I loved it! The message, as I understood it, was an advisory to live life with conviction and a whole heart. Be fully whatever you are. The Bible tells us that God “spews the lukewarm out of His mouth. ” If you are in life, then be fully in life. Don’t sit around wondering what you might do until it is too late to do anything. Will Rogers said, “You might be on the right track, but if you are sitting on it, you are going to get run over.”

Live by choice, not self-protection. Be active rather than reactive. Make a stand for your truth, and your truth will make a stand for you.

Support me to walk my talk.

My power comes from being what I am.

[bluidkiti]

January 6

Step by Step

Today, I cannot take for granted the vital lifeline that the support of an AA home group and other program members are in my own recovery. As such, I need to determine that I am attending enough meetings to bolster my recovery or, if I am limited by whatever restraints to make the meetings, that I have a strong enough social network through the program to carry me through. Working toward any goal, and maybe especially so if the goal is sobriety, can be more difficult if I am working alone. That difficulty is weakened when I have the support of others working toward the same goal but, in the process, I need to be willing to be honest in sharing my own history, what I have gained in the program and on which steps I need more work. Today, I need not be in self-imposed isolation, even in recovery, and I have to recognize the importance of peer and group support and acceptance. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

KINDNESS

Little deeds of kindness, little words of love, help to make earth happy.

~ Julia A.F. Carney ~

No act of kindness is ever too small to serve a good purpose. Oceans are made possible by little drops of water. Beaches are formed by tiny grains of sand. Slowly but surely, small efforts combine to help, encourage, and. lead others to an ocean of success.

Small acts make large contributions to our spiritual growth. Newcomers to our Program are advised that they can rid themselves of hatred, envy, resentments, and dislikes by using little acts and words to create a great turnaround in behavior. For instance, we are told, “Start forgiveness by praying for those you think have harmed you.” This small act of prayer removes powerful negative emotions and replaces them with the wonder of serenity.

I shall try to be a little kinder and a little blinder to the faults of those around me.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.

~ Berthold Auerbach ~

We need ways to express what we have experienced. Expression gives form to our experience and allows us to move on. Music taps into our deeper self and evokes feelings that we may not otherwise have access to. It conveys what is otherwise inexpressible and opens a channel to the spiritual world. Some men love to make music, and all of us can listen to it.

When asked to describe how we make contact with our Higher Power, some men have said that it’s mainly through music. The great religious traditions of the world all use music: hymns, bells, chanting, drums. But we don’t necessarily need religious music to make conscious contact with our Higher Power. A good song on the radio can do it.

Today I will let music speak for me of things I cannot say in plain words.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

… [A]ll shall be well and all shall be well and all manner of thing shall be well.

~ Julian of Norwich ~

Why are we prone to exaggerating the seriousness of the circumstances in our lives? Perhaps it’s because we lived for years barely on the fringe of sensible choices. We reacted hysterically to all manner of experiences, the mundane as well as the momentous. Our reactions could turn any situation sour. At long last we are learning a new behavior, but it takes practice.

As we learn to rely on a Higher Power to help us handle our experiences, we begin to grow in peace and the belief that all is well. Even when we are tormented by a decision, we can have faith that our Higher Power will lead us where we need to go. Our part of the bargain is to ask for help and to be open to guidance.

I will know peace today because I will trust my Higher Power’s guidance in the situations I face. All will be well if I do my part.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want my family to accept me

When I first got sick my family didn’t know what was happening. They got angry. They implored, “What’s wrong?!” They said “Straighten up!” They didn’t know how difficult their demands were. They didn’t know about addiction or mental illness and that both need treatment and support. I think they were very afraid, for me and for themselves.

Of course, I didn’t know the whole picture at first either. But through treatment, I am learning a lot about my illnesses and about myself. I am slowly coming to accept the way I am right now and my road to recovery. I believe that the more I accept myself, the more others will accept me.

I will pray for willingness to accept my family, as they are, and ask my helpers to bring us closer together.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Every man is the architect of his own fortune.

~ Sallust Crispus ~

When we were drinking or using, our loved ones grieved for us terribly. Just as our addiction damaged us, it also hurt those we love. Now that we are in recovery, we can make amends to those we’ve harmed, but we can’t heal them. This they must do on their own, in their own time.

We are not responsible for another person’s behavior, but we are responsible for our own. We got help from many sources, but for each of us, recovery is a personal triumph, our own achievement. No one could make us start, and no one could make us stop. We did that ourselves, and we did it by concentrating only on our own lives. This we must continue to do

Now we have the best of both worlds: the help and support we need to make progress in our programs, and the wonderful feeling of achievement and self-respect that comes from recovery.

Today help me neither blame others for my problems nor credit them for my triumphs.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Morning.
New day.
Joy of birth.

~ Deng Ming-Dao ~

Just as there is an air of mystery to night, with sunrise comes the joy of possibilities. What lies ahead?

Too many people start the day with little appreciation for the amazing miracle of a new dawn. They rarely live in the present moment. Like them, you may start a new day overloaded with commitments or plagued by the same old feelings of doubt or insecurity. You may begin the day haunted by ghosts of the past or phantoms of the future.

A Chinese parable tells the story of a wise man who challenges villagers to move a mountain together—a task that requires everyone to move a small amount of dirt and pebbles each day. Even after many hours of labor, he says, the task will be so grand that it will take generations of villagers to accomplish.

Rather than refuse to work or devise ways to speed up the project, the villagers choose to move the mountain. In performing the task, time means nothing to them, nor does reaching the goal. Rather, it is the task itself, and the ability to focus on that task, that is most important.

I offer a prayer giving thanks for the opportunity to experience a brand-new day. I ask for the strength to fully live in each moment.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

So every faithful heart shall pray to Thee in the hour of anxiety, when great floods threaten. Thou art a refuge to me from distress so that it cannot touch me; Thou dost guard me in salvation beyond all reach of harm.

~ Psalm 32 ~

It’s difficult to focus on the present when our minds are thinking of events yet to come. We may be so obsessed with an upcoming happening that we forget to stay in the present.

Perhaps we’ve been asked to speak at a meeting. Or maybe we have a big test tomorrow. Or maybe we have some plans days from now for a party, a family get-together, or a trip, that are already sending us into a whirlwind of tension and anxiety.

To stay in the present, we need to ask for help. Our Higher Power can help us with our anxiety about a future event, whether the event will happen five minutes, five days, or five years from now. Tonight and tomorrow will happen, no matter how much anxiety we have. But future events may turn out a little better if we take some serenity from our Higher Power with us.

Is an upcoming event causing me a lot of anxiety? How can I use the program to help me let go of this anxiety?

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Accepting powerlessness

There is nothing negative in the First Step of the program, where we admit that we are powerless over our addiction and our lives. Powerlessness is not weakness; it simply recognizes that power is an attribute of God, not humans.

We are powerless in and of ourselves. But when we look to the one who has all power, we can be set free—no longer bound by an addiction that does not love us. Have I tapped the source of all power?

Higher Power, help me to joyfully accept my powerlessness over my addiction, knowing that this will set me free.

I will accept my powerlessness today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

It’s not what you were, it’s what you are today.

~ DAVID MARION ~

Newcomer

I get the general idea of “ninety meetings in ninety days.” But aren’t there any exceptions? Some days, like on the weekends, I have time to go to more than one, but later in the week, when I’m exhausted from work, I’d sometimes rather go to a movie or go to bed early.

Sponsor

No one takes attendance; no one expects perfection. But why deprive yourself? In this program, we stay away from addiction a day at a time. At the beginning of recovery, especially if we’re going through a process of detoxification, twenty-four hours can seem endless. Going through a whole day of early recovery on our own may be bewildering and anxiety-producing. Why “white-knuckle it” when help is available at a meeting?

Anticipating a meeting at the lunch hour or at the end of a workday gives me a kind of safety net. Knowing throughout the day that I’m headed for a place where recovery is the top priority can help me through hard moments—I anticipate the meeting, instead of my preferred drug or compulsive behavior. Some of us prefer to begin the day with an early-morning meeting that helps us face the hours ahead calmly.

Each new day offers us new challenges, new opportunities for our addictions to flex their muscles. Going to a meeting can strengthen our spirits and help ensure our continuing recovery.

Today, I further my recovery by going to a meeting.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Let us stop and think about our room here on earth. We have occupied it all our lives; we have free heat and light. From the windows of this room we can look upon the grandest of nature’s landscapes if we so desire but it also looks upon poverty, slums and filth, if that is what we have eyes for.

How can we pay for our Room on Earth? Only by serving our fellow men, the children of the Landlord, “and inasmuch as ye did it unto these, ye did it unto Me.”

If you do less you are not worthy of your Room on Earth.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Most ( )A people spend more time deciding where to have lunch than in choosing a sponsor.

2) What starts out bad can’t end up good.

3) Insanity is the seeming inability to learn from past mistakes.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

To Be Prayer

O Lord, I ain’t what I ought to be,
And I ain’t what I want to be,
And I ain’t what I’m going to be,
But O Lord, I thank You
That I ain’t what I used to be.

***********************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

YOUR FATHER

The fourth name the prophet Isaiah speaks of is that of Everlasting Father. As Jesus so clearly pointed out, God is our Father, not merely our Creator. But we have to establish our own consciousness of this fact.

In the fifth place, we receive what is perhaps the greatest name of all, “The Prince of Peace.” Think what perfect peace of soul, if you could attain it, would actually mean to you. If you had real peace of soul, do you suppose that your body could be ill? Given real peace of soul, how easy it would be to find your true place in the world. How quickly and efficiently you could perform your work. Once you have attained true peace of soul, you have made it possible for the Child to teach you new things, utterly beyond the compass of your present understanding.

Of the increase of his government and peace there shall be no end, upon the throne of David, and upon his kingdom, to order it, and to establish it with judgment and with justice from henceforth even for ever (Isaiah 9:7).

In view of the fact that the weaker souls, the fearful, and the unbelieving, and the depressed, should find it impossible to believe that such good tidings could be true, the prophet clinches the matter with the definite assertion:

. . . The zeal of the Lord of hosts will perform this (Isaiah 9:7). 

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Limitbusters

Do the thing you fear, and the death of fear is certain.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

“May I speak to you for a moment?” the older woman asked the young hunk on the beach.

“Well, I was hoping to have some quiet time,” he replied.

“I won’t bother you—I just need to tell you something.”

“Okay.”

She pulled her beach towel next to his. “I need to talk to you because I am afraid to,” Beverly confessed. “I feel too shy to speak to good-looking men who are younger than I am. When I saw you today, I wanted to talk to you, but I felt anxious. So I had to do this to break my sense of ‘I can’t.’”

The man thanked Beverly for her honesty, and the two engaged in pleasant conversation. Then she excused herself and walked away, stronger than she was when she approached him.

Fear tells us that we are small, powerless, and separate. Love affirms that we are great, creative, and connected. Which voice do you choose to be your guide?

The way to dissolve a limit is to step right up to it and look it in the eye. When we shine the light on the darkness, we see that the thing we ran from had power over us only as long as we kept it at a distance. When we face what frightens us, we discover that we are bigger than it is. We can do anything we choose; we were not born to live in fear, but in love.

I am free as God created me.

I am bigger than fear. I step forward and live in the light.

[bluidkiti]

January 7

Step by Step

Today, I will invoke the Program’s oldest of mottoes and “Take It Easy.” If I am new to recovery, I will not become impatient and possibly disillusioned with the program if its promises are not soon enough for me. If I am well into recovery, I will not be overwhelmed by the responsibilities that sobriety requires and take each of those obligations in their proper priority and in the time they require. I will not push myself if I am not fast enough to get to the next task I want to achieve, and I will not expect too much of either myself or anyone else. Today, I will do what is expected of me by others and myself, but I will do it in the time required of the Higher Power. Adversely, I will not do anything today with the impatience that I wanted it done yesterday. To do that risks disillusionment with myself and the program, and recovery doesn’t allow for either. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

WANTING GOD

God becomes directly and actively concerned with us humans when we want Him enough.

~ Norman Vincent Peale ~

In writing about the Twelve Steps in the magazine Guideposts, Norman Vincent Peale stated, “Quite suddenly I saw that the power in (those steps) could be tapped by anyone wrestling with a power stronger than self. The Twelve Steps are a channel through which we can direct our appeal to the one Power that can lift the burden from us no matter what that burden is.”

The Twelve Steps can be successfully applied to solving problems caused by any obsession or dependency. Regardless of age, background, or any other difference among members, the Steps lead to admit-ting and accepting a need, finding a Higher Power, turning problems over to God as we understand Him, pinpointing defects of character, making amends, reducing our defects, and learning to find God’s will for us by prayer and meditation.

I am learning to let God further into my life.

***********************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

~ Dalai Lama ~

The word compassion means literally to suffer with someone. We normally use the word more broadly to mean empathize, or feel, with a person. Moving out of the prison of our own self-centeredness, we grow in the ability to see the world through the eyes of others. We grow wiser and more effective in our own lives because we aren’t limited to one outlook. We learn to forgive ourselves and suddenly we are much freer with our forgiveness of others.

There is a generosity of spirit in compassion, and the most generous attitude comes when we can act compassionately with someone we don’t especially like. Even though we may not choose a particular guy to be our best friend, we can accept and honor the hard times he has had and we can put ourselves in his place to see what his challenges have been. Nothing is more admirable than a strong man acting generously and compassionately toward another human being.

Today I will strive to be generous with compassion and to see the world as someone else sees it.

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We are giving birth to ourselves. Let’s be mid-wives to one another through this difficult, yet exhilarating, process.

~ Dudley Martineau ~

Helping each other survive the traumas of our lives strengthens us. We can’t be overwhelmed by any experience if we rely on each other for support as we walk through it. What lucky women we are.

Having the courage to take advantage of opportunities transforms us. Where do we want to take our lives? Who do we want to become? The decisions are many and exciting. The counsel of our friends can guide us, but which doors we open is up to us.

Most of us experienced the pain of our lives alone. Revealing to someone else what our lives were like was far too scary. How could they possibly like us or accept us if they knew who we really were? Now those days are gone forever. Our decision to get help, and thus give help, is giving every one of us the new life we deserve.

My rebirth gives me opportunities to share my good fortune with others. I will be attentive to everyone today.

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am letting go of old friends and making new ones

I didn’t want to give up my old using friends. Most every day we would show up at the same place to keep each other company and get high. We trusted each other. We understood each other like nobody else (except others with psychiatric illness).

I still miss the old crowd and sometimes I want to visit them. But I don’t. That would make it too easy to use again. I feel lonely at times, but I’m trying to let them go and slowly make new friends now—sober and stable ones. Given the way I used to live my life, that’s not easy. But there are a couple of people I can relate to these days. I will just have to give it some time.

I will pray for the willingness to make friends; I will pray for courage.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

One way to become enthusiastic is to look for the plus sign. To make progress in any difficult situation, you have to start with what’s right about it and build on that.

~ Norman Vincent Peale ~

Beginning our days with a positive mental outlook is a great depression- chaser. Simply lifting our heads and looking up and out instead of down will make us feel better. Although we can’t spend all our time staring at the sty, we can train ourselves to look for the best in ourselves and others.

Even in the middle of difficulty or pain, we have choices. We can choose a gloom-and-doom attitude and endlessly replay the thoughts that accompany it. Or we can step back and find the one good thing. We may be blinded with pain. The situation may appear hopeless, utterly bleak. But recovery guarantees that we are equal to it, that in our pain there is at least one good thing.

We are the masters of our fate. We can change even the most difficult situations with an attitude of hope and positive expectation. Approaching each day with a hopeful heart will give us a different approach to our troubles.

Today help me find the one good thing. Help me let go of fear and negativity.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

You have been under attack from the enemy, he has tried to steal your money, your marriage, your home, your children, your job, your peace, your joy, your love and today we declare “no more” and today we declare that we are on the road to recovery.

~ Doug Dickerson ~

The road of recovery offers some smoothly paved sur-faces, but often it has obstacles such as potholes and downed limbs. It is a bumpy, unpredictable path that can challenge your commitment and drain you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. At times you may feel your strength so depleted that you want to give up. And you may come across those who sense your near-defeat and tempt you to travel an easier route.

You have been down that road before! A road filled with those who wanted your companionship because you were as sick and wounded as they were. Those who said you did not have a problem.

Beware of those who will try to distract you. Know that there will be times when you move forward and times when you experience setbacks. The path that offers the greatest challenge is often the one leading you in the right direction.

The road to recovery will offer challenges to my strength. Today I accept these challenges and know that the more I work the program, the better I will become.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Prayer should be the key of the day and the lock of the night.

~ Old proverb ~

Many of us believe prayer has to be scheduled—a once-in-the-morning and once-at-night routine. Yet few of us remember prayer is merely a conversation with our Higher Power. We can pray anytime and as often as we’d like.

Prayer in the morning is a wonderful way to open the day. Yet do we continue to keep the door open by renewing our conversation with our Higher Power? Do we turn to our Higher Power during times of stress, joy, sadness, or peace? We may be so busy in our daily tasks that we forget to keep that door open.

Tonight the door is still open. Our Higher Power is still there to listen. We can share our feelings of the day as though we were talking to a close friend. We don’t have to prostrate ourselves before our Higher Power. All we have to do is start talking. Then we can close the door with prayer, knowing we have with us the good, warm feelings that faith brings. And as we finally lay down to sleep tonight, we can say goodnight to our Higher Power and give thanks for the day.

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Finding balance

Let’s not forget to play. Our new way of life is a serious matter, but it is not intended as a punishment; nor do we need to repent and suffer for the rest of our lives. Our new way of life is intended to produce growth.

But growth takes work. And work needs play for balance. If we forget to play and be joyful, our life will become imbalanced and we will suffer needlessly.

Have I found some balance in my life?

Higher Power, help me remember that all living things need balance: let me laugh, let me play, let me grow.

My plan for playing today is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Fortunately, time, rather than intelligence or study, eventually helps us see the other side of things.

~ ANNEMARIE COLBIN ~

Newcomer

I don’t think these meetings do enough. Some people come in with their health in terrible shape. Someone should be evaluating them! I think I should be getting vitamin B shots. I’m angry that such important things are being ignored.

Sponsor

You may very well need extra vitamins; nutrition sounds like something you might be ready to look into. You may want to see a doctor, a nutritionist, or both. I support you in your desire to get help with the ways you have neglected your health. And I understand that you feel angry at not being taken care of.

One reason that this program works for me is that it respects my decision to seek help, if and when I choose to, from the people and institutions I trust. It doesn’t get into the business of dispensing medical advice, diets, vitamins, or exercise plans, any more than it tells me where to pray, how to earn a living, or whom to vote for. The group doesn’t hire experts to come tell us how to run our lives, and we don’t have to be covered by insurance to come to a meeting. Each of us here is an expert on just one thing: our own experience of addiction and recovery. You might say that we’re specialists!

Today, I appreciate the gift of my experience.

I add one new thing to my knowledge of how to take care of my health—physical, mental, and spiritual.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

One day you were a weak, hopeless sot; then came a day when you were clear eyed and sober. You are certainly aware that you could not, of yourself, accomplish this miracle—for it was truly a miracle.
This did not happen because you were selected by wild chance. You were chosen because you possessed the qualities that made you suitable for the work the Higher Power needed done. To say that you lack the ability to “carry the message” is to question the wisdom of God.

There is work here that you were born to do.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Self-will run riot.

2) If you don’t want what we have, we will cheerfully refund your misery.

3) FEAR: Forget Everything And Run.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Prayer for the Hurried

Lord, slow me down.

Ease the pounding of my heart by quieting my mind. Steady my hurried pace. Give me, in the con fusion of my day, the calmness of the everlasting hills. Break the tension of my nerves and muscles. Help me to know the magical, restoring power of sleep.

Teach me to take minute vacations by slowing down to look at a flower or a cloud, to chat with a friend, to pat a dog, to read a few lines from a good book. Remind me that the race is not always to the swift; that there is more to life than increasing speed.

Let me look upward into the branches of the towering oak and know that it grew great and strong because it grew slowly and well.

Lord, slow me down. Inspire me to send my roots deep into the soil of life’s enduring values that I may grow toward the stars of my great destiny.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

YOUR LORD

A great deal of confusion seems to exist in many minds concerning the precise avenue through which realization and harmony are to be attained.

The only solution is to contact the divine Power that dwells within your own soul; and to bring it to bear upon the various difficulties in your life, taking them in due order, that is, attacking the most urgent first. The real remedy for every one of your difficulties is, as we are on every page of the bible, to find and know the Indwelling Presence.

Acquaint now thyself with him, and be at peace: thereby good shall come unto thee (Job 22:21)

This, then, is the task, and the only one—to find, and consciously know, your own Indwelling Lord. You see now how the confusion disappears, and the perfect simplicity of the whole thing emerges once you realize this fact.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Finally Made Something

What should it profit a man if he gains the world but loses his soul?

~ Jesus Christ ~

As a boy, my idol was baseball star Mickey Mantle. Along with millions of other kids, I dreamed of playing centerfield for the Yankees, slamming home runs over the fence to the tune of a huge crowd’s roar of adoration, and winning the Most Valuable Player Award. Several years ago, I saw an interview with Mickey Mantle after he had come out of the Betty Ford Clinic. I was stunned to learn that my hero had succumbed to a long and grisly bout with alcoholism. The interviewer asked the former star, nearing death due to liver damage, “How would you like people to remember Mickey Mantle?”

With great humility, he answered, “I would like people to think that I finally made something of myself.”

Finally? I couldn’t believe my ears! If anybody had ever made anything of himself, I thought, it was Mickey Mantle, the most loved and respected athlete of an entire generation. The Mick was the king. Yet, through his eyes, all his stardom was for naught in the face of his losses to drink. To Mickey Mantle, overcoming his alcoholism was a far greater achievement than all the home runs he’d ever hit.

All worldly glory pales in comparison to spiritual awakening. Mickey Mantle mastered his lesson of a lifetime when he graduated from the Betty Ford Clinic. No matter what accolades we achieve in the outer world, it is our inner life we need to come to terms with. Although he had all the laurels a man could dream of, Mickey Mantle found peace only when he found himself.

Should you be tempted to trade inner peace for worldly glory, re–member the Mick. It’s what’s inside that counts.

Help me remember where my true peace lies.

I am a spiritual being. I nourish my spirit and I am fed.

[bluidkiti]

January 8

Step by Step

” …(W)e spent three or four hours formally going through the Six-Step program as it was at that time.

Complete deflation.
Dependence and guidance from a Higher Power.
Moral inventory.
Confession.
Restitution.
Continued work with other alcoholics.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Personal Stories,” Ch 10 (“He Sold Himself Short”), p 292.

Today, the program’s original steps still serve to simplify the purposes of what later would become the 12 steps. “Complete deflation” is the goal of the first step – “admitted we were powerless” – and “Continued work with other alcoholics,” the marching orders of the 12th step. In between, we find and concede to a higher power from which we seek the strength and honesty to admit our faults to ourselves and someone else, and then make amends – restitution – for those wrongs. Today, if 12 steps seem too high to climb for now, “Keep It Simple” and look to the original six steps. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SMILE AGAIN

Tis easy enough to be pleasant
When life flows along like a song.
But the man worth while
Is the man who can smile
When everything goes dead wrong.

~ Emily Wheeler Wilcox ~

We can truthfully, gratefully, and humbly say, “because of my recovery program, I can smile again.” An addictive substance wipes smiles from the faces of men and women who become addicted. With honesty and thankfulness, we can say that the worst problems we face in recovery would have been a lot worse if we were still using.

In our new lives, even when everything goes dead wrong, we have learned to weigh any disaster against what it would have been like if we were still using. We are always aware that, if we smile while sharing with another, the hurt can become a lesson, and they, too, can smile again.

Recovery assures me that, while into each life some rain must fall (and sometimes it’s a torrent), behind the clouds the sun is still shining brightly. Bright days always come.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Lead us from the unreal to the real world.

~ Hindu invocation ~

In pursuit of pleasures and escapes during our active addiction, we created a bubble of unreality around ourselves. Stepping into the bubble was exciting; it carried us off into gambling, or erotic and romantic pursuits, or shopping, or drugs and alcohol, or the codependent thrill of scooping other people out of their troubles. We used a whole system of half-truths and self-deceit to allow the bubble to exist. It led us to become more self-centered and more grandiose as we tried to force the unreal world to exist in reality.

Now, as we live in freedom from our addictive and codependent behaviors, we continue to peel back the layers of unreality. We no longer fight with reality as it is, or try to shape and mold it to fit our desires. We see more clearly by living more honestly. One of the benefits of our new life is that we feel clearheaded. Life seems simpler now, and we feel a peace of mind that we could not have even imagined in the past.

May I continue to see and accept reality as it is given.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Learning stamps you with its moments.

~ Eudora Welty ~

We never stop learning. We absorb information every waking moment. And while we sleep, we process what we encounter during the day. The conclusions we reach about these daily lessons will likely be based on the perception that dominates our lives. Do we perceive our experiences as for our good or for our undoing?

Since learning is ongoing, we are fortunate to have a more positive context within which to interpret our experiences. Alcoholics Anonymous, as well as other Twelve Step programs, offers us a set of guidelines to live by, which helps us interpret every moment.

We can anticipate what lies ahead, or we can dread it. What we learn from each experience reflects our attitude. Our commitment to the Twelve Steps determines it.

I will soak up the day like a sponge. My education is within my control. How lucky I am to have this program!

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

If I take meds, I can’t use drugs

My psychiatrist said I needed to stop using all drugs and alcohol and take a psychiatric medication. She said that if I did, my symptoms would diminish. I wasn’t sure if I believed her. Why should her medication take care of my symptoms better than my street drugs? I wanted to get better—and maybe medication could help—but I was afraid to give up my drugs.

Eventually, I got up the courage to tell all this to my support group. Several of them admitted that they were taking prescribed psychiatric medication. They all agreed that it was tough to get clean and sober, but that medication acted on the body differently and really did work better than street drugs. Well, was I glad to hear this. It made it a lot easier for me to believe my doctor, get clean, and give medication a try.

I will ask my support group and my doctor to help me get abstinent and then stay stable.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

There is an end to grief, if we have the courage to accept our personal goodness and our ongoing right to happiness.

~ Justin Langley ~

Making peace with our losses takes time and trust. When we were living in the pain of our addiction we acted in ways that were heartbreaking to our selves and others. But now we have a new choice: we can walk the road of self-forgiveness and stop punishing ourselves for past deeds, or we can decide that we don’t deserve to feel good, that clinging to our pain, guilt, and self-loathing will somehow make up for some of the damage.

Believing our wrongs are too great to be righted leaves us in a perpetual state of mourning. It’s a risk, but we can choose to believe that change is possible, not all at once but slowly, one day at a time.

Believing that God loves us and wants us to be happy gives us the courage to make amends and face our past head on. When we take the leap of faith necessary to grieve and let go of the past, we take back our best selves, and the lives we were meant to live.

Today give me the strength and the courage to grieve my losses.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Health—what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.

~ Phyllis Diller ~

You may question your resolve or need to stay sober when nearly every day new research credits moderate drinking with living longer and other positive outcomes, such as reducing or preventing diabetes, rheumatism, bone fractures and osteoporosis, and poor cognition and memory.

But what such studies often fail to mention are the negative effects of drinking, such as obesity, high blood pressure, and mental impairment. While it may be tempting to use such studies as an excuse to drink, you know your behaviors do not reflect those of a moderate drinker. Your recovery depends upon steadfast devotion to improving your overall health and quality of life while remaining committed to your sobriety.

Sound health requires daily attention to your spirit, mind, and body. A healthy body requires good nutrition and engaging in a daily exercise program. A healthy mind depends upon a good night’s sleep and exercising your mental capacities through learning and enjoyable activities. A healthy spirit needs a relationship with a Higher Power built and strengthened through prayer, faith, and trust.

Today I will focus on abstinence and maintaining a healthy

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Don’t be afraid to take a big step. You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps.

~ David Lloyd George ~

Taking a risk can be scary. Whether the risk involves a new relationship, asking for a raise, being honest, or changing a behavior, it’s still pretty hard to do. Sometimes we may wish we could approach a risk with only partial involvement, almost as if we had one foot inside a door and one outside. That way, if things get too difficult, we can always run away.

But we can’t take a risk unless we commit ourselves to it. And we can’t commit ourselves unless we have faith that no matter what happens, we’re okay. We may feel vulnerable, but we don’t have to feel alone if we remember our Higher Power is with us.

Perhaps we took a risk today and are still feeling scared and exposed. Or maybe we’re planning on taking a risk tomorrow and are filled with fear. Remember it’s okay to have feelings of fear, doubt, and insecurity.

Tonight I will relax and know I never approach a risk without my Higher Power to guide me.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Dealing with anger

Anger has its place, but chemically dependent people tend to let anger run away with them. The old saying “Be angry, but sin not” is a tall order for us. Two sins of anger are revenge and resentment. Either of them mixed with anger has a way of poisoning the angry one, both mentally and spiritually.

Since revenge and resentment are killers for us, it is best to turn over to our Higher Power the situations and people we are angry with.

How do I deal with my anger?

When I feel angry, whether justified or not,

I pray that I keep it in check and turn it over.

Today I will deal with my anger constructively by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

… that they may solve their common problem…

~ ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS PREAMBLE ~

Newcomer

When they say we’re here to solve our common problems, I’m really put off. Adults should be able to handle their problems on their own, shouldn’t they?

Sponsor

We don’t go to meetings to solve our “problems,” but rather our “problem”—singular. Meetings address the problem none of us could solve on our own: the disease of addiction.

I can identify with your discomfort at the thought of accepting help from a group of people. I’ve always wanted to think of myself as independent. Talking about what’s bothering me feels like I’m risking my pride, my privacy, and my autonomy.

Deep down, though, I care a great deal about what other people think of me. I’m afraid that if they really get to know me, they’ll find out I’m not good enough. I’m afraid they’ll want more from me than I’m capable of giving. I’d rather believe that I don’t need others than risk being challenged or let down by them.

I’m not alone in having these fears and resentments of others. Most of us who’ve resorted to addictive substances or behaviors have problems in our relationships with other people.

When, through the help of other recovering people, we solve our common problem of addiction, we become truly independent. We’re free of our deadly attachment to a drug. We’re free to acknowledge our connections with other human beings.

Today, I add the word “help” to my vocabulary.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

God does not willingly inflict punishment on men. Our pain and our suffering are the direct results of a violation of the Moral, Natural or Civil Law.

We who were guilty of overindulgence must pay the price, not FOR our indulgence, but BECAUSE of our indulgence. The consequences must follow as the night follows the day. It is the LAW.

We have violated this LAW and we have paid dearly for it, but we do not have to persist in our violations. The body will heal, sins will be forgiven, things will right themselves if, and when, we put our thoughts and actions in tune with the immutable laws of God, of Nature and of man.

As sins bring punishment as a natural consequence, so right living brings its own compensations, not as a reward for good deeds done but as a CONSEQUENCE.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) When you accept others, you accept yourself.

2) No decision (right or wrong) is complete until it is fully accepted.

3) When things are going great, sobriety is good. When things are going bad, sobriety is better.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

For Another Day

Thank You, dear God, for another day,
The chance to live in a decent way,
To feel again the joy of living,
And happiness that comes from giving.
Thank You for friends who can understand
And the peace that flows from Your loving hand.
Help me to wake to the morning sun
With the prayer, “Today Thy will be done,”
For with Your help I will find the way.
Thank You again, dear God, for another day.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

BEGIN TODAY

The first step that the earnest student must take to locate the Inner Light within himself is to settle on a definite method of working, selecting whichever one seems to suit him best, and then giving it a fair trial. Merely reading books, making good resolutions, or talking plausibly about the thing will get him nowhere.

Get a definite method of working, practice it conscientiously every day; and stick to one method long enough to give it a fair chance. You would not expect to play the violin after two or three attempts, or to drive a car without a little preliminary practice.

Get to work on some concrete problem, choosing preferably whatever it is that you are most afraid of. Work at it steadily; and if no improvement at all shows itself within, say, a couple of weeks, then try your method on another problem. If you still get no result, then scrap that method and adopt a new one. Remember, there is a way out. The problem really is, not getting rid of your difficulties, but finding your own best method for doing it.

. . . Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in my name, he will give it to you (John 16:23).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

From the Rooftops

If only you could love, you would be the most powerful being in the world.

~ Emmet Fox ~

I walked off the airplane along with hundreds of passengers at 11:00 p.m., drenched in weariness after five hours of air travel. Just then I noticed a young man striding down the jetway wearing a huge wooden sign in the shape of a heart, painted with red letters: “Pam, will you marry me?”

I looked ahead to see an attractive young woman waiting for him at the door. This is going to be rich, I thought, as I positioned myself to view this historic proposal. Sure enough, the fellow got down on one knee and asked for her hand in marriage. Although Pam was terribly embarrassed, she uttered a definite “yes,” echoed by a round of applause from the crowd that had gathered. All the tired travelers came to life in the presence of this bold expression of love, and we walked lightheartedly together to the escalator, laughing and talking buoyantly.

Can you imagine how the world would be different if we all made such a stand to manifest our dreams? A Course in Miracles1 tells us that all acts are expressions of love, either as skillful statements or calls for love in dis–guised forms. Love is the power that moves the universe, and it is the aching need of our world. If only we stood for love as we have for fear!

Practice expressing your love courageously. My friend Jeffrey has devoted his life to giving love. Whenever he sees me, he showers caring upon me through word, hug, and energy. He is one of the happiest people I know. He is a love giver rather than a love seeker. In giving what he wants, he has gotten it all.

Give me the courage to express my true caring without fear or reservation.

I stand for love, and love stands for me.

[bluidkiti]

January 9

Step by Step

” …(A)ny alcoholic capable of honestly facing his problems in the light of our experience can recover, provided he does not close his mind to all spiritual concepts. He can only be defeated by an attitude of intolerance or belligerent denial.

“We find that no one need have difficulty with the spirituality of the program. Willingness, honesty and open-mindedness are the essentials of recovery. But these are indispensable.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “Appendices,” No. 2 (“Spiritual Experience”), p 570.

“There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance – that principle is contempt prior to investigation.” – Herbert Spencer

Today, I look to HOW – Honesty, Open-Mindedness and Willingness – to guide me if I continue to struggle with the concept of spirituality even if a spiritual awakening or experience may be little more than a change in personality and which usually comes over time instead of suddenly and with fireworks. If, indeed, a spiritual experience can be a simple improvement in my personality, outlook, perspective and philosophy of life, I can also expect that experience to be assured because, without alcohol, there is going to be some change in my emotional status and personality. It is up to me to employ the steps and traditions to make that change for the better. Deceit, closed-mindedness and a refusal to admit that something stronger than me – alcohol – could defeat me was my spiritual state as a drinking alcoholic. Today, as an alcoholic in recovery, I seek Honesty, Open-Mindedness and Willingness (HOW) out of necessity. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FUTILITY OF HATRED

Hating people is like burning down your own home to get rid of a rat.

~ Henry E. Fosdick ~

Hatred has many ancestors, and it breeds many vicious offspring. It’s easy to hate someone, some thing, or some idea. That hatred gives birth to anger, resentment, envy, impatience, and fear. It soon becomes obvious to the newcomer that, by holding on to hatred, they are also breeding these other negative emotions as well.

Like a compulsion or addiction of any kind, hatred always gets worse unless we stop feeding it. When we indulge in hatred, we are unable to justify the savage feelings we experience. So we add anger, fear, and all the rest in order to fill the gap, but it’s never enough. The result is always a need for more hatred, which crowds all the positive areas of our lives with negative emotions.

The time I spend on hatred can be better used in working my Program.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

God’s admiration for us is infinitely greater than anything we can conjure up for Him.

~ Saint Francis of Assisi ~

Those of us who look back upon a trail of guilty feelings and shame may find it hard to fathom God’s admiration for us. This whole idea, which comes from a Christian saint who lived eight hundred years ago, turns upside down our ideas of a God who is watching us and counting all the things we have done wrong. But we have been created to have a place here. And we have a right to take our place among all of God’s beloved creatures.

No matter how imperfect we are, no matter what we feel guilty about, no matter how low our self-esteem, we are living in the grace of a God who loves us and holds us close, even at our lowest point. We sometimes feel alienated from God. We have difficulty making conscious contact. Even then, we can still know that God carries us through these hard times.

Today I will walk in the light of God’s admiration and accept it to the best of my ability.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I wish I could keep in mind that God can provide, God will provide, and God does provide.

~ Marie Gubbels ~

Relying on God for the guidance to deal with our problems seems much too simple. We probably spent decades looking to alcohol, other drugs, and relationships for the solution to the ache that never left. We didn’t know then that God was waiting in the wings for our prayers. Even knowing it, as we do now, hasn’t prevented us from looking for help elsewhere, time and again. It has never been our nature to keep our lives simple. However, we are getting more practiced at the simpler life since becoming a part of this recovery program.

We may need to choose, daily, to believe that God can, will, and does provide for our every need. Because most of us haven’t had a life-changing spiritual experience, we must decide every day to look to God. Fortunately, a moment of quiet and a tiny prayer is all that we need to do. God is never more than a thought away.

I will practice my reliance on God at every turn of events today. I believe I will receive guidance and knowledge concerning how to proceed next.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I better accept myself when I am able to accept others

Even though I’m working a program of dual recovery for my addiction and a psychiatric illness, I’m still having some disturbing symptoms and I can’t go back to my old job yet. At times, I find myself withdrawing; at times, I feel bad because my recovery is not where I want it to be.

Fortunately I tend to feel better about myself when I go to a support group meeting. My fellow members have problems much like mine. They too are working a dual program and recovering. What I find is that as I accept them, I am more willing to accept myself.

I will schedule two support group meetings each week as part of my dual recovery plan.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The smaller the head, the bigger the dream.

~ Austin O’Malley ~

When we were small, we dreamed big dreams. We dreamed of flying to the moon or stopping a mountain lion with our bare hands. Our parents and older siblings humored us, and we knew it. But we also knew we could do these things.

As we grew older, we let go of our childhood dreams. We were told to grow up. We were told to be realistic. We were told in so many ways that dreams don’t come true. So many of us stopped dreaming. And we grew up.

When we are overwhelmed with pain and problems, resolution may seem as likely as flying to the moon or stopping a mountain lion with our bare hands.

But now, with help from our Higher Power and Twelve Step program, we’re starting to believe in miracles again. We’re learning how to recapture our childhood selves, how to let our inner child dream big dreams. We cannot accomplish what we cannot imagine. Dreams give us energy, hope, and the courage to take one more step.

Today help me dream. Remind me that I cannot accomplish what I cannot imagine.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.

~ Albert Schweitzer ~

At times you may feel there is no vision to run eagerly toward, no joy to give a sense of purpose, and no desires to fulfill your day-to-day existence.

Centuries ago, sages would give of their knowledge and skills, without any thought of personal benefit or financial gain. The message of compassion and selflessness they were teaching was far greater than any riches or personal gain. Their satisfaction came from the knowledge of how their actions gave hope to others.

Each time you reach out to another person, you send forth a tiny ripple of hope that grows more powerful with each person it touches. In doing so, you become more capable of seeing that you are not the only one who may be unhappy or suffering. In fact, you may see that your current difficulties pale in comparison to what others are experiencing. Your gift of hope to others is also a gift to yourself.

Today I choose to be of use. I will offer help to those who are feeling overwhelmed so they see they are not alone in their struggles.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Later. I’m still young. I’ll think of spiritual things when I’m older. On my deathbed.

~ Garrison Keillor ~

Too often we’ve thought prayer is for the aged, the sick, or the dying. If we are young, healthy, and successful, we may think we don’t need to communicate with a Higher Power. “I’m fine right now,” we may say. “I will . . . later on.”

The time to establish contact with a Higher Power is now. From the minute we come kicking and screaming into this world until our last breath, there is a Power greater than ourselves watching over us. This Power guides us, strengthens us, and helps us grow even without our acknowledging it is there. But it is because we don’t acknowledge its presence that we become lost, confused, depressed, angry, hopeless, or unforgiving.

Our time to reach out to our Higher Power is not when our bodies stop running. Now is the time to ask for direction, seek knowledge, become open to receiving divine guidance. If we open ourselves now to developing our spirituality, we will open a valuable door to our growth.

Can I begin to develop my spiritual beliefs? Can I open my mind and heart to a Higher Power?

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Changing

You cannot build a house or a life without some foundation. While we were still drinking or using drugs, it seemed our lives could not change. There was no foundation to build on. We had no working principles in our lives. We found we could not become the good things we wanted to become.

Until we quit drinking or using, we didn’t know that there was a way we could make ourselves, one day at a time, into the kind of person we could accept. But the Steps and the fellowship make personality change possible.

How have I changed?

Higher Power, let me be willing to love myself and live myself into a new life, one day at a time, based on honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness.

I will seek change today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Which way lay safety? Which way life?

~ JACQUES LUSSEYRAN ~

Newcomer

What would be the harm of using in moderation? The rest of the world does it. I have to admit that I feel deprived, even somewhat resentful.

Sponsor

When I was free to use in moderation, how moderate was I? Was my relationship with certain substances and behaviors easy and comfortable, one that created no problems for me or others? Was it easy for me to stop, once I got started? Was it easy for me to stay stopped, if I chose to? It’s easy to slip back into denial about the seriousness of my problem, once I’ve gotten some momentary feelings of control.

Some of us consumed our addictive substances in smaller quantities than others did. Some of us are taller or thinner or shorter or younger; some spent more years in school; some can enjoy strawberries without breaking out in a rash. I can easily point to the differences between me and others; there are plenty!

Or I can go to meetings, listen, and see if there are feelings with which I identify. The addictions that call to us will always be there, if we decide to go back to them. For today, there’s no hurry to return to old habits. Let’s keep an open mind, as we go through today without putting our recovery at risk.

I look honestly at my previous life and remember what feelings and situations got me here.

For today, I give myself the chance for recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It would be most difficult to contradict the statement that you cannot get sobriety unless you honestly want it. You cannot find a God of your understanding unless you honestly seek Him. It is likewise true that you cannot reap full measure from our Program unless you honestly live it.

Self-deception is very hard to recognize for if we recognized it, it would no longer be deceptive. Honesty with ourselves can only be acquired by diligent study of ourselves, our ideals, our ambitions and our motives.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) It’s hard to learn from a mistake you don’t acknowledge making.

2) The best thing you can do is get out of your own way.

3) If you make yourself available, you’ll get what you need when you need it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The 23rd-1/2 Psalm

The Lord is my sponsor! I shall not want.
He directs me to go to many meetings.
He desires me to sit back, relax, and listen with an open mind.
He restores my soul, my sanity, and my health.
He leads me in the paths of sobriety, serenity, and fellowship for my own sake.
He teaches me to think, to take it easy, to live and let live, and to do first things first.
He makes me honest, humble, and grateful.
He teaches me to accept the things I cannot change, to change the things that I can, and gives me the wisdom to know the difference.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of despair, frustration, guilt, and remorse, I will fear no evil, for God is with me. The Program, God’s way of life, the Twelve Steps—they comfort me.
God prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies: rationalization, fear, anxiety, self- pity, and resentment.
God anoints my confused mind and jangled nerves with knowledge, understanding, and hope. No longer am I alone; neither am I afraid, nor sick, nor helpless, nor hopeless. My cup runneth over.
Surely sobriety and serenity shall follow me every day of my life, twenty-four hours at a time, as I surrender my will to God and carry the message to others; and I will dwell in the house of my Higher Power, as I understand Him, daily.
Forever and Ever. Amen.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

NO RESULTS WITHOUT PRAYER

There is only one way to make spiritual progress, and that is to practice the Presence of God. Mankind is continually seeking to discover a shortcut but as usual the lazy man takes the most pains in the long run, and having wasted his time in wandering up bypaths, he is ultimately driven by failure and suffering to the realization of the grand truth that there is no substitute for prayer; that is, the conscious dwelling upon the Being of God.

If your intuitive nature is well developed, you will seldom need to use formal statements at all. This is excellent—for all who will trouble to climb a ladder when he is strong enough to leap over the wall?

But it must not be overlooked that very many people do all their work with formal statements of Truth, and get consistently good results by working in this way. Not through repeating affirmations like a parrot. Those who work like a parrot inevitably make a parrot’s demonstration—they remain in a cage. Of a good worker who used the same phrases many times it was said by a friend: “He constantly uses the old affirmations, but he stuffs them with fresh feeling every time.”

The Lord is nigh unto all them that call him, to all that call upon him in truth (Psalm 145: 18)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Your Point of Power

Don’t play for safety. It’s the most dangerous thing in the world.

~ Hugh Walpole ~

When popular singer Bobby McFerrin got bored with his performances, he faced a crossroad in his career. After the smash success of his 1988 song, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy,” he set out on a long and grueling concert tour—but then the joy fell out. “I wasn’t being fair to my audiences or myself,” McFerrin confessed. “I wasn’t pre–sent. I wasn’t scared anymore.” McFerrin dropped out for two years, spent quality time with his family, and explored novel musical forms. He came back fresh and imaginative, established the groundbreaking ensemble, Synchestra, performed duets with premier cellist Yo Yo Ma, and went into classical conducting.

I attended a most innovative Bobby McFerrin concert, during which I and the rest of the audience waited the entire evening for Bobby to sing “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.” He didn’t.

I have a formula for knowing if a next step is the right one for you: If you feel both excited and scared, that is it. If you’re just excited and not afraid, there is no challenge, no stretching, no initiation; you are still in your safe zone, and growth is unavailable. If you’re just afraid, there is no positive motivation. Why walk through a fear unless there is something you are walking toward? But if you are simultaneously turned on and frightened, do it and watch your growth skyrocket.

You owe it to yourself, your loved ones, and your clients to stay on your cutting edge. If your career or relationship is a bore, step back and ask yourself what it would take to make it exciting. Then ask yourself what it would take to make it scary. The intersection of the two answers is your point of power.

I pray to follow my spirit and walk past fear to make my dreams come true.

Powered by enthusiasm, I step forward to greater things.

[bluidkiti]

January 10

Step by Step

“AA has become a way of life and living for me. It has brought about a revelation of self, the discovery of an inner being, an awareness of God.

“I wouldn’t give it up or trade it for anything. And the only one who can take it away from me is me – by taking that first drink.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Stopped in Time,” Ch 7 (“A Teenager’s Decision”), p 355.

Today, perhaps my deadliest enemy is not alcohol or the “contributing factors” that I came up with to “blame” for my alcoholism. Maybe my greatest enemy is myself. If I am fighting an urge or temptation to drink or if I haven’t yet gone into recovery, how I react to either is my decision and responsibility and no one else’s. If a slip is pending or if I continue to drink because I think I’m either not ready to quit or the state of my life makes sobering up uninviting, the consequences are mine and mine alone if I pick up the next drink. Let me look to the Fourth Step to identify the emotional and spiritual weakness or sickness that fuels my self-destruction. Today, I have no desire to give in or give up. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FIRST THINGS FIRST

Heaven is not reached by a single bound. But we build the ladder by which we rise.

~ J.G. Holland ~

The old saying, “Rome was not built in a day,” tells us that every great achievement must have a single beginning and must continue to be built with care. So it is understandable that in recovery we need to be reminded that all good endings depend on a careful, useful, and productive program of progress.

Our recovery brings us the best things in life, but we must never be greedy with them. Our appetite for the good things is great, but it should never become so great that we stop tasting each step of progress like we would taste each bite of a good dinner.

It is exciting to lose the desire for our addictive substance, but we must always stay alert to overconfidence. Carelessness can tell us, “You’ve got it made; you’re free.”

Today, I’ll remember that many a relapse has been a complete and painful surprise. “First Things First” and “Easy Does It” must always be my guides.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The fearless are merely fearless. People who act in spite of their fear are truly brave.

~ James A. LaFond-Lewis ~

Fear plays a role in our lives in different ways. Many of us have been so conditioned to deny fear that we don’t even know we are afraid and are, in fact, reacting to it. We may look back on a major life choice and realize we chose one job over another because of fear. Some of us can see in the rearview mirror that our controlling ways rise out of fear, not desire for power. The fact is that until we allow ourselves to know our fears, we will react impulsively to them and cannot respond bravely to them.

Our fears don’t give us a license to control those around us. Our fears don’t make our addictive escapes any less harmful. On this path we seek to know our fears, to call them by name so we can be smart in dealing with them. Sometimes we may use our fear as wise guidance to avoid danger, and other times we may choose to bravely step into the circle of our fear and face it down because we do not want to be irrationally ruled by it.

Today I will open my eyes to see my fears and then choose wiser, braver responses to them.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

To stop behaving in a certain way is to risk the unfamiliar.

~ Jan Lloyd ~

Old patterns grip us so tightly! Even when the behavior pinches us painfully, we are loathe to give it up. Its familiarity makes it tolerable, knowable, somewhat manageable, and far less scary than trying something new. However, we are truly the luckiest women alive because now we have a training ground where it is safe to try new behaviors. We can discard old, self-defeating patterns in the safe environment of these Twelve Steps.

We are on this recovery path because each of us wants a new life. We have grown sick and tired of the old ways that no longer work. And we have come to believe that change is possible if we look for it in the right place. This is the right place! At any meeting we can see other women who, like us, are trying on new behaviors and meeting with success. We are role models for one another, and every time one of us tries a new response to an old situation, we are all heartened and stretched a bit. We know that what another can do, we can do too.

I am in the right place today to let go of the old and try the new. My support is all around me. I will not fear.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I will give the Twelve Step fellowship a fair chance

I went to a Twelve Step meeting—as my counselor suggested—and I didn’t like it. It felt so different from my support group. The Step meeting seemed formal and I felt uneasy when people talked about God and a “higher power.”

On the other hand, maybe I overreacted. I know I don’t like doing new things. I know I’m not eager to face my problem with chemicals these days. To tell the truth, I did hear some helpful comments about being willing and staying abstinent. Maybe I need to follow the facilitator’s suggestion—take what I like and leave the rest. Maybe I could get some help there after all. (And if this meeting doesn’t work out, there are other Twelve Step meetings to try.)

As suggested for newcomers, I will give my Twelve Step meeting five more chances.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Live by faith until you have faith.

~ Peter Boehler ~

A little faith is better than no faith. We need not be free from all doubt to turn our will and our lives over to the care of our Higher Power. No one of us has complete faith, perfect faith. We know only that our sobriety depends on our belief in a Power greater than ourselves.

Clearly, we didn’t fare so well on our own. Our drinking and drugging controlled us. Now that we admit we are powerless over addiction, we need to find something more powerful than ourselves. We have much to gain; we know this from seeing people at meetings who believe in a Higher Power. We know of the serenity and calm that can come from such belief. We’d like that for ourselves, too.

It’s tempting to try and carry all burdens alone. But with all that heavy baggage strapped to our backs, everyone else passes us by, free and light from having left their burdens with a Power greater than themselves. We can find that freedom, too.

Today I’ll spend a moment in conscious contact with my Higher Power even though my faith isn’t perfect yet.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love.

~ Hubert Humphrey ~

In the past, the people you called friends may have been those with whom you drank or drugged. Their excessive caregiving may have directly or indirectly encouraged you to keep drinking or using. They may have lied for you, made excuses for you, or did everything they could to protect you from the consequences of your actions and behaviors. However well-meaning such actions were, you understand now that these friends were not helping you.

The program teaches that unhealthy friendships are with those who continue to drink or drug, those who are codependent or enablers, and those who do not want you to change. By continuing to associate with such people, you run the risk of relapse.

The program uses the slogan “Stick with the winners” to promote the role healthy friendships can play in maintaining abstinence. The winners are those who can and will offer the highest level of support in recovery. Begin today by thinking about each of these special people and how your life is better because of them. Take time to reach out to the friends you have made in the program.

Healthy friendships are like angels sent from my Higher Power. Today I will remember that I need to cherish these friendships always, for they are blessings in my life.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Great Spirit, help me never to judge another until I have walked in his moccasins for two weeks.

~ Sioux Indian prayer ~

How many times do we see someone who dresses or acts differently? How do we usually react to such a person? Do we stare or make a comment to someone next to us? Meetings are excellent places to come in contact with those who come from different backgrounds. Do we greet each person we meet with care and attention, or do we pass judgments and make jokes?

Our Higher Power has given each of us a diverse background and personality. Some of us have known incredible hardship or handicap. Some of us have limited education. Some of us live in crowded spaces. But some of us have had opportunities. Some of us have an educational degree. Some of us live in large homes. Yet is there any one of us who is better than another?

If we are prone to judge or criticize, tonight we can decide to take a first step toward silence. Remember that education and economics do not make someone better. We are the same, no matter how much, or how little, we have.

I can learn not to judge others.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Seeking growth

We are where we are for a reason. As long as that reason remains, we remain where we are. If we aren’t where we think we should be, working the program will help us get to where our deepest self longs to be. This is growth.

And growth is work. We must be willing to do the simple things that our new under-standing asks of us. We are never given more than we can handle, and the loving help we need along the way is always available. But we never get this help in advance, only as we need it.

Am I seeking growth?

Higher Power, help me want to grow and be willing to do the simple things, day by day, that add up to big changes.

I will seek growth today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The war is over.

~ SAYING HEARD AT MEETINGS ~

Newcomer

I’m trying to understand the First Step, and I’m really stuck on that word “powerless.” I’m not weak; I don’t want to be called powerless. It really insults my intelligence.

Sponsor

Let’s take a look at this part of the First Step together. It doesn’t simply say, “We admitted we were powerless.” Far from it. It says that we were powerless over something. We recognized that a specific substance or behavior had proved stronger than our determination not to consume it or engage in it. Choosing recovery does not mean that we are weak, but it does offer us an opportunity to surrender. Accepting the truth that we have an addiction is an easier way for us to change our addictive behavior than continuously fighting with it. When I resist, my enemy just seems to get stronger. So instead, I accept that there are some things I can’t control. That acceptance becomes a source of enormous power.

Today, I empty my hands and let go of my weapons.

I admit that addiction has played a role in my life.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Alcoholism, or compulsive drinking, is incurable. We have seen too much evidence of the fact to believe differently—yet, occasionally, some of us get the idea that we are exceptions to the rule. Then the Rat Race begins all over again.

We are alcoholics. We must admit it and accept it as one of those things we cannot change.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) FEAR: Forgetting Everything’s All Right.

2) Willingness is the key to acceptance.

3) Our spiritual possibilities are unlimited when we willingly decide to live them.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

This I Believe

Tomorrow is yet to be,
But should God grant me another day,
The Hope, Courage, and Strength
Through the working of the Twelve Steps and Serenity Prayer,
I shall be sufficiently provided for to meet my every need.
This I believe.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

PERSISTENCE BRINGS RESULTS

Prayer is the one thing that can make a change in your life. If you will go direct to God in simple, affirmative prayer, you can heal your body, bring peace and harmony in your life, and make well-being a reality.

Sometimes discouragement sets in when the answer does not come immediately but God is working on the unseen plane and our part is to be persistent. Persistence in prayer is an expression of our faith, for by our persistence we are affirming our belief that God will make his answer plain.

…men ought always to pray, and not faint (Luke 18:1)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

One Frog Per Hand

Never try to catch two frogs with one hand.

~ Country wisdom ~

I remember a television entertainer who balanced spinning plates on thin wooden sticks. At first his act looked easy as he added one plate at a time to the array. Then his job became tense and hilarious as he tried to keep all the teetering plates spinning without let–ting them fall and crash.

Many of us try to do so many things at once that we don’t get any of them done well. Instead of expanding with creative joy, we succumb to “Management by Emergency.” We say yes to more than we can handle and then spend most of our time putting out fires. We take on so many projects that we cannot give any of them the attention they deserve, and we leave ourselves overworked, exhausted, ineffective, and sometimes ill.

When my mother was in the hospital awaiting surgery, she was very unhappy. Her biggest complaint was that no doctor would give her quality time; her physicians would rush in and out and treat her like an item on an assembly line. The day before her surgery, I went to visit her, and she was beaming. “I saw the nicest doctor today!” she exclaimed. “He sat down with me, drew me a diagram of what he was going to do, and answered all my questions patiently. Now I feel peaceful.”

To be a true healer, teacher, minister, parent, or business person, you will gain more in the long run by giving your clients quality attention. To be successful, no matter what your vocation, you must be fully present with what–ever you’re doing. Life is best lived one wholehearted moment at a time.

I want to live a quality life. Let me say yes to what belongs to me and let all else go.
My presence is the present. I give my whole heart, and I find true reward.

[bluidkiti]

January 11

Step by Step

“The last three years of my drinking, I drank on my job. The amount of will power exercised to control my drinking during working hours, diverted into a constructive channel, would have made me President, and the thing that made the will power possible was the knowledge that as soon as my day was finished I could drink myself into oblivion. Inside, though, I was scared to death, for I knew that the time was coming (and it couldn’t be too remote) when I would be unable to hold that job. Maybe I wouldn’t be able to hold any job, or maybe (and this was my greatest fear) I wouldn’t care whether I had a job or not. I knew it didn’t make any difference where I started, the inevitable end would be skid row. The only reality I was able to face had been forced upon me by its very repetition – I had to drink; and I didn’t know there was anything in the world that could be done about it.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “They Lost Nearly All,” Ch 12 (“Freedom From Bondage”), p 548.

Today, remembering when I drank on the job, then fear that I would be “caught” and lose it and, ultimately, not caring if I did. And I remember the thought that got me through those long working days – I could go home and drink myself into literal oblivion. And I could do it all over the next day. I need to remember so I don’t forget the helpless, hopeless and pathetic creature I had become and that my early time in the program required some tough, tough work not only to sober up but also to care again. Today, the power of a drink after work holds no power anymore, only disdain and disgust that it will plunge me back into that yesterday if I allow it. Today, I won’t allow it. The harsh and painful memories of my yesterday serve me well today not to go back there. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

OPTIMISM

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears that this is true.

~ James Branch Cabell ~

Optimists say that there are far more successes than failures in recovery. Pessimists say the opposite. The Program says that anyone in recovery is a success. The Program never fails, but individuals do because they give up too easily and too quickly.

When we decide to work closely with others, we have already declared that we will be optimistic about succeeding. During our excessive years, we suffered all the pessimism we ever again want to suffer. When we gather at a meeting, we are former pessimists who join in being optimists about winning. The irony is that this makes us winners.

Two people were served hamburgers for lunch. The pessimist muttered, “What a small dab of meat,” while the optimist exclaimed, “What a big bun they serve here.”

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Any one thing is “hitched to everything in the universe.”

~ John Muir ~

Some days our lives seem to be in chaos. We may feel flooded with too much: too much work, too much pain, too much to learn, or too many problems to handle. On days like this, we can begin to see past the chaos and feel hopeful about dealing with the future because we can turn to our Higher Power.

All things are part of a larger whole in the universe, and all things are connected. We are never completely alone. There is comfort and security in knowing that we can rely on our Higher Power. We only have to do a small part today. The universe will continue to work its way toward a natural solution to today’s problems.

Today I will concentrate on simply doing one small part of what needs to be done.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Make lists; take action.

~ Connie Hilliard ~

Our responsibilities can seem overwhelming if we let them pile up in our minds. Worrying about what needs to be done rather than doing it feeds our fear of inadequacy. We came into recovery certain that we didn’t measure up, but if we use the program we can conquer those fears.

Focusing on “first things first” gets us moving in the proper direction. That slogan, coupled with “keep it simple,” can change how we respond to every challenge. We feel overwhelmed because we look at the whole, rather than at the individual tasks that need specific, manageable bits of attention.

This program and these Twelve Steps were created to help us stay clean and sober. But they can do so much more. They are a blueprint for handling every minute of the day, every person we encounter, every task that deserves our attention. Nothing piles up if we follow the guidance of the program’s architects.

I will not be overwhelmed if I keep it simple today. Doing one thing at a time is all that’s expected.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to think twice about using

I can’t stop thinking and I can’t sit still. I’m tired of TV and radio. The next appointment with my counselor is two days away. Right now I don’t much care what he said about mixing alcohol with meds. I can’t stand the way I’m feeling. I have to relax. I want a drink.

But if I have one drink, I’ll probably have another. If I have two, I’ll have a dozen. I might wake up in detox again. I might have a setback. Maybe a drink isn’t the best thing for me after all.

When I have strong cravings, I will stop whatever I’m doing for two minutes and think about my options.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The butterfly becomes, only when it’s entirely ready.

~ Chinese proverb ~

Entirely ready? Do we ever feel entirely ready to do anything? This takes some spiritual support. Once, we put things off as much as we could, as often as we could, whenever we could. Action was not a very familiar concept in our lives. Promises — those came more naturally. In a promise there was no demand involved. In time, broken promises became a trademark of our lives.

But not today. Today, we can make a commitment and keep it. Each day we act more responsibly, more consistently, and get more things done.

As we move through stages of becoming entirely ready, we need to stay more constantly in touch with our Higher Power. Because we are so easily threatened by the changes that happen in recovery, we need help to feel secure. We want the gifts we’ve been offered and can only have them if we keep working, and keep growing in trust.

As we continue on the road of recovery, we feel more and more ready. As we come to accept that our program is based on progress, not perfection, we gradually find ourselves transformed, spiritually. We are becoming entirely ready.

Today grant me the courage and the patience to accept the sometimes slow process of change.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act.

~ Abraham Maslow ~

Worry prevents you from living in the present and causes you to fret about what has already happened or what might happen. Too much worrying can exaggerate situations and drain you of the energy you need in the present.

To cure worry, learn to distinguish between facts and fantasies. For example, you may be worried your sponsor will end your interactions because of a disagreement you had. Ask yourself, “Is that a fact?” The answer will help you figure out whether your worry is based on fact or fiction. Then consider actions you can take. Ask, “What can I do about this right now?” Rather than worry your sponsor will walk away from you, talk to your sponsor so you can resolve any differences. Develop similar plans of action for other worries so you can stop looking backward or peering fearfully ahead.

It has been said, “Yesterday’s a cancelled check, tomorrow’s a promissory note, but today is cash. Spend it wisely,” Seek out those things that you can change and let go of your worries about that which you cannot control.

I have the power to make my worries gigantic or to shrink them. Today I will take action to live fully in the present moment.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The first thing I had to conquer was fear. I realized what a debilitating thing fear is. It can render you absolutely helpless. I know now that fear breeds fear.

~ Byron Janis ~

The future can be scary, especially if we try to predict what will happen. Sometimes we may even go further, not only predicting what may happen but also anticipating our reactions to those events. If only we knew what will happen, then we wouldn’t have to be afraid of the future.

If we’re not careful, we will allow every fearful feeling to overtake us until the fear extends into other parts of our lives. Fear can be like a hidden trap, catching us whenever we try to go anywhere or do anything. We cannot see, hear, or touch fear, but we can give it so much power that it almost has a life of its own.

We can get rid of the traps fear has set for us. We can do that by having faith in our Higher Power. We can have faith that our way has been prepared for us, faith that we are safe wherever we are.

I can cut the ties with which fear binds me. Without fear, I will only feel the safety of faith.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Changing our attitudes

Our prayer is, “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” We say this prayer at least once a day because although we must accept the things we cannot change today, they may, in fact, change tomorrow.

This seems to be a paradox, yet once we truly and completely accept something, it begins to change. While the objective fact remains unchanged, our attitude toward it and our relationship to it has changed. It is with our attitudes toward people and things that we must learn to live.

Am I changing my attitudes?

Higher Power, help me live fully today, neither forward nor backward, but here and now.

The attitude I will work on today is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Let the counsel of thine own heart stand.

~ APOCRYPHA ~

Newcomer

I’ve told one or two old friends that I’ve started going to meetings of a Twelve Step program. One of them is very dubious about it. When I talked about being addicted, she said she’d never thought of me as having a serious problem. Maybe she’s right—she’s known me for a long time.

Sponsor

It’s ultimately our own deep discomfort that tells us we have a problem. Our friends, our families, and even our doctors may have told us that they want us to get help—or they may have said that they don’t believe we have a serious problem. Do they know the whole truth about us? We may have hidden our addiction from them. They may not be adequately informed about what addiction is. Or they themselves may be in denial, in order not to have to look at their own relationship to addiction.

Friends who aren’t facing a life-and-death disease may not understand that what I’m doing here is saving my life. They may think that I’m exaggerating my problem or that I’m simply caught up in a trend. Such opinions appeal to me at times, when I’d rather not have to face what I know to be true in the depths of my being.

We can’t let others “vote” on our decision to enter recovery—it’s up to us to know our own truth and respect it.

Today, I own my need for recovery.

I don’t argue about it, with myself or with others.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We brought nothing into this world and shall take nothing out. We are in the process of living a lifetime, one day at a time. It is therefore reasonable that we should gather as much of the richness of living from each day as we possibly can.

Does it make you feel good all over when you spend a buck or two on some poor devil? Then don’t deny yourself this dividend of living.

************************************************

~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) If you really want to stay sober, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

2) FEAR: Fornicate With Everything And Run.

3) You are right where you are supposed to be.

************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Beatitudes

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
Blessed are they who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God.
Blessed are they who are persecuted for righteous- ness’s sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

***********************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD IS LIFE

The first main aspect of God is Life. God is not just living, nor does God give life, but God is Life. Where God is, there Life is.

When you are sick you are only partly alive. When you are tired or depressed or discouraged, you are only partly alive. Few people express God in an adequate way because they lack the sense of life.

Joy is one of the highest expressions of God as Life. Actually it is a mixture of Life and Love, and the Bible says, “the sons of God shout of joy”. When we realize our divine sonship, we must experience joy. Joy always has an expansive effect, just as fear has a contracting effect. When a person says, “I can’t”, there is a retraction. You could not imagine a person saying, “Yes, I can”, with a shrinking gesture, or “No, I can’t”, in an optimistic or forthright way. The body always expresses the thought: and the thought of Life heals and inspires, whereas thoughts of fear and death contract and destroy.

Realizing divine Life heals the sick. Animals usually respond quickly, and the plants very quickly indeed, because they do not have that strong sense of personal egotism that most human beings do. They never make up their minds that they cannot get well or that “sickness is sent for a good purpose”. Neither do they give away to discouragement because they have not been healed faster.

For God giveth to a man that is good in his sight Wisdom, and Knowledge, and Joy ….. (Ecclesiastes 2:26).

************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Unbeatable

Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another.

~ Madonna ~

One of my favorite movie characters is played by Gene Wilder in Stir Crazy. Harry is a man who is perpetually happy, and nothing that anyone says or does can remove his joy. Thrown in prison for a crime he did not commit, Harry is the object of the prison officials’ campaign to break him into the mold. After the guards hang Harry by his wrists for several days, they return to find him with a big smile on his face. “Thank you!” he exclaims. “You’ve finally solved my back problem!”

Next, the officials toss Harry into the hot box, a tiny tin enclosure in the sweltering sun. When they extract him, he begs, “Oh, please, could you give me just one more day was just starting to get into myself.” Finally, they throw Harry into a cell with Grossburger, a 300-pound crazed murderer who even the most hardened criminals avoid like the plague. When the guards return, they find Harry and Grossburger on the floor laughing over a game of cards. Harry just chose joy, and let all else revolve around his choice.

No one can take away your happiness unless you give it to them. People may say all manner of things about you or try to hurt you, but unless you choose to be hurt, they cannot rob you of your good. They are making choices that determine their happiness, just as you are choosing yours. When we feel hurt by another, we are only hurting ourselves. It is said that “offense is something you can only take but never give.”

Experiment with finding blessings wherever you go. Quickly you will discover that using a vision of perfection is far more empowering than one of loss. In love you are unbeatable.

I pray to see life through Your eyes, that I may fully reap the gifts of love.

My happiness depends on me. I choose joy now.

[bluidkiti]

January 12

Step by Step

Today, in the throes of all the demands at work and in my personal life, I strengthen my resolve to my recovery by remembering how I got here – and why. I must ask myself honestly if I have experienced the fundamental change in emotion and psyche that is required in recovery. I must not permit any of those destructive influences of my yesterdays to sabotage today and, probably, tomorrow. I must acknowledge any subconscious seed that might be planting a slip or relapse. And if that seed exists, I know I’m in trouble with the first three step. Those steps – of total admission, surrender and submission of all I cannot control – are the building blocks of my recovery. I must be on guard if I feel a crack in any of them. Today, I am an alcoholic, and I cannot – and do not want to – drink. Sweet and simple. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

OPTIMISM

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears that this is true.

~ James Branch Cabell ~

Optimists say that there are far more successes than failures in recovery. Pessimists say the opposite. The Program says that anyone in recovery is a success. The Program never fails, but individuals do because they give up too easily and too quickly.

When we decide to work closely with others, we have already declared that we will be optimistic about succeeding. During our excessive years, we suffered all the pessimism we ever again want to suffer. When we gather at a meeting, we are former pessimists who join in being optimists about winning. The irony is that this makes us winners.

Two people were served hamburgers for lunch. The pessimist muttered, “What a small dab of meat,” while the optimist exclaimed, “What a big bun they serve here.”

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Any one thing is “hitched to everything in the universe.”

~ John Muir ~

Some days our lives seem to be in chaos. We may feel flooded with too much: too much work, too much pain, too much to learn, or too many problems to handle. On days like this, we can begin to see past the chaos and feel hopeful about dealing with the future because we can turn to our Higher Power.

All things are part of a larger whole in the universe, and all things are connected. We are never completely alone. There is comfort and security in knowing that we can rely on our Higher Power. We only have to do a small part today. The universe will continue to work its way toward a natural solution to today’s problems.

Today I will concentrate on simply doing one small part of what needs to be done.

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Make lists; take action.

~ Connie Hilliard ~

Our responsibilities can seem overwhelming if we let them pile up in our minds. Worrying about what needs to be done rather than doing it feeds our fear of inadequacy. We came into recovery certain that we didn’t measure up, but if we use the program we can conquer those fears.

Focusing on “first things first” gets us moving in the proper direction. That slogan, coupled with “keep it simple,” can change how we respond to every challenge. We feel overwhelmed because we look at the whole, rather than at the individual tasks that need specific, manageable bits of attention.

This program and these Twelve Steps were created to help us stay clean and sober. But they can do so much more. They are a blueprint for handling every minute of the day, every person we encounter, every task that deserves our attention. Nothing piles up if we follow the guidance of the program’s architects.

I will not be overwhelmed if I keep it simple today. Doing one thing at a time is all that’s expected.
************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to think twice about using

I can’t stop thinking and I can’t sit still. I’m tired of TV and radio. The next appointment with my counselor is two days away. Right now I don’t much care what he said about mixing alcohol with meds. I can’t stand the way I’m feeling. I have to relax. I want a drink.

But if I have one drink, I’ll probably have another. If I have two, I’ll have a dozen. I might wake up in detox again. I might have a setback. Maybe a drink isn’t the best thing for me after all.

When I have strong cravings, I will stop whatever I’m doing for two minutes and think about my options.

***********************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The butterfly becomes, only when it’s entirely ready.

~ Chinese proverb ~

Entirely ready? Do we ever feel entirely ready to do anything? This takes some spiritual support. Once, we put things off as much as we could, as often as we could, whenever we could. Action was not a very familiar concept in our lives. Promises — those came more naturally. In a promise there was no demand involved. In time, broken promises became a trademark of our lives.

But not today. Today, we can make a commitment and keep it. Each day we act more responsibly, more consistently, and get more things done.

As we move through stages of becoming entirely ready, we need to stay more constantly in touch with our Higher Power. Because we are so easily threatened by the changes that happen in recovery, we need help to feel secure. We want the gifts we’ve been offered and can only have them if we keep working, and keep growing in trust.

As we continue on the road of recovery, we feel more and more ready. As we come to accept that our program is based on progress, not perfection, we gradually find ourselves transformed, spiritually. We are becoming entirely ready.

Today grant me the courage and the patience to accept the sometimes slow process of change.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I can feel guilty about the past, apprehensive about the future, but only in the present can I act.

~ Abraham Maslow ~

Worry prevents you from living in the present and causes you to fret about what has already happened or what might happen. Too much worrying can exaggerate situations and drain you of the energy you need in the present.

To cure worry, learn to distinguish between facts and fantasies. For example, you may be worried your sponsor will end your interactions because of a disagreement you had. Ask yourself, “Is that a fact?” The answer will help you figure out whether your worry is based on fact or fiction. Then consider actions you can take. Ask, “What can I do about this right now?” Rather than worry your sponsor will walk away from you, talk to your sponsor so you can resolve any differences. Develop similar plans of action for other worries so you can stop looking backward or peering fearfully ahead.

It has been said, “Yesterday’s a cancelled check, tomorrow’s a promissory note, but today is cash. Spend it wisely,” Seek out those things that you can change and let go of your worries about that which you cannot control.

I have the power to make my worries gigantic or to shrink them. Today I will take action to live fully in the present moment.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The first thing I had to conquer was fear. I realized what a debilitating thing fear is. It can render you absolutely helpless. I know now that fear breeds fear.

~ Byron Janis ~

The future can be scary, especially if we try to predict what will happen. Sometimes we may even go further, not only predicting what may happen but also anticipating our reactions to those events. If only we knew what will happen, then we wouldn’t have to be afraid of the future.

If we’re not careful, we will allow every fearful feeling to overtake us until the fear extends into other parts of our lives. Fear can be like a hidden trap, catching us whenever we try to go anywhere or do anything. We cannot see, hear, or touch fear, but we can give it so much power that it almost has a life of its own.

We can get rid of the traps fear has set for us. We can do that by having faith in our Higher Power. We can have faith that our way has been prepared for us, faith that we are safe wherever we are.

I can cut the ties with which fear binds me. Without fear, I will only feel the safety of faith.

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Changing our attitudes

Our prayer is, “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” We say this prayer at least once a day because although we must accept the things we cannot change today, they may, in fact, change tomorrow.

This seems to be a paradox, yet once we truly and completely accept something, it begins to change. While the objective fact remains unchanged, our attitude toward it and our relationship to it has changed. It is with our attitudes toward people and things that we must learn to live.

Am I changing my attitudes?

Higher Power, help me live fully today, neither forward nor backward, but here and now.

The attitude I will work on today is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Let the counsel of thine own heart stand.

~ APOCRYPHA ~

Newcomer

I’ve told one or two old friends that I’ve started going to meetings of a Twelve Step program. One of them is very dubious about it. When I talked about being addicted, she said she’d never thought of me as having a serious problem. Maybe she’s right—she’s known me for a long time.

Sponsor

It’s ultimately our own deep discomfort that tells us we have a problem. Our friends, our families, and even our doctors may have told us that they want us to get help—or they may have said that they don’t believe we have a serious problem. Do they know the whole truth about us? We may have hidden our addiction from them. They may not be adequately informed about what addiction is. Or they themselves may be in denial, in order not to have to look at their own relationship to addiction.

Friends who aren’t facing a life-and-death disease may not understand that what I’m doing here is saving my life. They may think that I’m exaggerating my problem or that I’m simply caught up in a trend. Such opinions appeal to me at times, when I’d rather not have to face what I know to be true in the depths of my being.

We can’t let others “vote” on our decision to enter recovery—it’s up to us to know our own truth and respect it.

Today, I own my need for recovery.

I don’t argue about it, with myself or with others.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We brought nothing into this world and shall take nothing out. We are in the process of living a lifetime, one day at a time. It is therefore reasonable that we should gather as much of the richness of living from each day as we possibly can.

Does it make you feel good all over when you spend a buck or two on some poor devil? Then don’t deny yourself this dividend of living.

************************************************

~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) If you really want to stay sober, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

2) FEAR: Fornicate With Everything And Run.

3) You are right where you are supposed to be.

************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Beatitudes

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
Blessed are they who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled.
Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God.
Blessed are they who are persecuted for righteous- ness’s sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

***********************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD IS LIFE

The first main aspect of God is Life. God is not just living, nor does God give life, but God is Life. Where God is, there Life is.

When you are sick you are only partly alive. When you are tired or depressed or discouraged, you are only partly alive. Few people express God in an adequate way because they lack the sense of life.

Joy is one of the highest expressions of God as Life. Actually it is a mixture of Life and Love, and the Bible says, “the sons of God shout of joy”. When we realize our divine sonship, we must experience joy. Joy always has an expansive effect, just as fear has a contracting effect. When a person says, “I can’t”, there is a retraction. You could not imagine a person saying, “Yes, I can”, with a shrinking gesture, or “No, I can’t”, in an optimistic or forthright way. The body always expresses the thought: and the thought of Life heals and inspires, whereas thoughts of fear and death contract and destroy.

Realizing divine Life heals the sick. Animals usually respond quickly, and the plants very quickly indeed, because they do not have that strong sense of personal egotism that most human beings do. They never make up their minds that they cannot get well or that “sickness is sent for a good purpose”. Neither do they give away to discouragement because they have not been healed faster.

For God giveth to a man that is good in his sight Wisdom, and Knowledge, and Joy ….. (Ecclesiastes 2:26).

************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Unbeatable

Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another.

~ Madonna ~

One of my favorite movie characters is played by Gene Wilder in Stir Crazy. Harry is a man who is perpetually happy, and nothing that anyone says or does can remove his joy. Thrown in prison for a crime he did not commit, Harry is the object of the prison officials’ campaign to break him into the mold. After the guards hang Harry by his wrists for several days, they return to find him with a big smile on his face. “Thank you!” he exclaims. “You’ve finally solved my back problem!”

Next, the officials toss Harry into the hot box, a tiny tin enclosure in the sweltering sun. When they extract him, he begs, “Oh, please, could you give me just one more day was just starting to get into myself.” Finally, they throw Harry into a cell with Grossburger, a 300-pound crazed murderer who even the most hardened criminals avoid like the plague. When the guards return, they find Harry and Grossburger on the floor laughing over a game of cards. Harry just chose joy, and let all else revolve around his choice.

No one can take away your happiness unless you give it to them. People may say all manner of things about you or try to hurt you, but unless you choose to be hurt, they cannot rob you of your good. They are making choices that determine their happiness, just as you are choosing yours. When we feel hurt by another, we are only hurting ourselves. It is said that “offense is something you can only take but never give.”

Experiment with finding blessings wherever you go. Quickly you will discover that using a vision of perfection is far more empowering than one of loss. In love you are unbeatable.

I pray to see life through Your eyes, that I may fully reap the gifts of love.

My happiness depends on me. I choose joy now.

[bluidkiti]

January 13

Step by Step

“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.” – Step One

Today, every journey has a starting point, and the road to recovery begins with Step One. Today, I have no doubt that I am powerless over alcohol and that it makes my life unmanageable. If I find even a small grain of reluctance to fully admit my powerlessness over alcohol, I wonder if I am willing to lose more to drinking or if I refuse to lose any more. If I answer that I could risk not losing anything more, I have not given Step One the gut-level honesty it requires. If I answer I cannot or will not give up anything more to alcohol, I have taken a productive First Step. Today, I admit I am powerless over alcohol and, in surrendering, my life can begin to become manageable again . And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

BE POSITIVE

Two men look out through bars. One sees the mud, the other the stars.

~ F. Longbridge ~

When we tell ourselves we can’t progress, we are making sure we never can. We need to remember that success breeds success. A feeling of “I can do it” meant success in the important action of finding a Higher Power. After that, we could turn over our problems to that Higher Power. That accomplished, we could recognize our shortcomings and the release of their pos-session of us. Then we could make amends to those we had harmed. We continued to pray and meditate, and finally could give of what we had in serenity and security to others who suffered our problems.

Recovery places the accent on the positive side of involvement and effort. A negative approach creates a feeling of being a loser which causes extra problems in itself.

Today I will say only positive things, or I will say nothing at all

************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined.

~ Henry David Thoreau ~

To have a dream takes courage and a bit of hope. A dream guides us, even if we haven’t let ourselves bring it to consciousness. How often do we stop to ask what our dreams are? Do we even know what we want? This path is about becoming the best men we can be. It’s more about who we become than what we achieve. So it inspires us to create dreams for our development as men.

When we take a few moments to reflect on the kind of men we want to be, we create reference points, or beacons, to move toward. This gives us a way to measure our actions and our choices. Do our actions take us in the direction we want to go, or do they take us off course? Are we growing into the men we want to be, or have we forgotten to follow our beacons?

In my actions today, I will keep my dreams in mind and choose my course with confidence.

************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The divided self exists in all of us.

~ Marie Lindquist ~

One gift of sobriety is the growing awareness that we are complex, whole women, more than just our dark side. Defeated, we came into this program of recovery certain that our lives would be forever fraught with problems. Little in our experience made us proud. Surviving our hateful, painful, and confusing lives was our proudest achievement.

The moment we admit our powerlessness over our drug of choice and over other people, a fresh start commences. Becoming willing to let a Higher Power influence our lives gives us a chance to glimpse the brighter side of our being. We discover it was there all the time.

We’ll always have both sides, the dark and the light. We’re human. Nevertheless, we tend to strengthen the part of our “self’ that calls to us loudest. Which side we hear is up to us.

I am a complex woman. I have the next twenty-four hours to live as I choose. What actions will pleasure me most?

************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am learning about “good” drugs

For a long time, I thought a “good” drug was one that was strong, cheap, and easy to get. It was a very “good” drug if it got me high fast and kept me high for a long time.

Now, in recovery, I see drugs differently. I am learning that a good drug is prescribed for me by a doctor (especially a psychiatrist who knows addiction and recovery) and purchased at a pharmacy. A good drug helps me cope with my psychiatric illness, it does not get me high. Such a drug is best called a medication. Unlike street drugs, if I have any problems with my medication, I can call my doctor for assistance.

At my next dual recovery meeting I will share my old and new understanding of good drugs.

***********************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Many of us can probably recount the details of the “last straw,” the turning point, the moment we began the journey on the road to recovery. Up until then all roads, however different, led downhill. For some of us the descent was steep, rough, and swift; for others, long and winding across years of denial, the pain just under the surface.

But today we are on the brink of recovery. Maybe it still looks like the bottom, but now we’re looking up. And that’s what counts.

Part of looking up involves enthusiasm for life’s smaller offerings. We relish the little things we once overlooked: apple-picking with children on an autumn afternoon; planting seedlings in the spring that, come summer, will yield flowers; the joy of going to sleep with a contented heart.

Enthusiasm breathes hope into our resolve to begin a new sober life. Life looks better in sobriety and it will be better. Enthusiasm can be a key.

Today help me greet my recovery with gratitude for all that has happened and enthusiasm for all that can be.

************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

~ Leo Tolstoy ~

You may not only be an alcoholic or addict, but also an adult child of an alcoholic. Because of the dysfunction in your childhood home, the focus was not on your growth out of childhood but on the problems of your parents. You were usually taught to assume adult responsibilities well in advance of adulthood. As a result, you may be overwhelmed by feelings of confusion, fear, and insecurity. While you are living in an adult’s body, you have the unanswered emotions of a child.

There are many resources available, including Al-Anon as well as Adult Children. Both self-help groups follow the Twelve Steps of AA, dealing openly and honestly about how the drinking or chemical dependencies of others affected you. These groups teach your five basic rights: to be free from the past, to learn a new way of life, to express feelings, to develop self-esteem, and to ask for help.

Adult Children groups offer you a new way of life. Your feelings can be validated by hearing what others have to share, and you can learn how to express your feelings in a safe environment.

Today I will begin or continue to attend meetings that help me to recover from the negative effects of my childhood.

************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When health is absent, wisdom cannot reveal itself, art cannot manifest, strength cannot fight, wealth becomes useless, and intelligence cannot be applied.

~ Herophilus ~

If we have ceased an obsessive behavior, we may think we are now healthy. Yet we may not be paying enough attention to our needs for sleep, good food, and exercise. We may also be ignoring our spiritual and mental health needs by not taking time to meditate or communicate with others.

Taking away an obsession doesn’t mean we’re cured. Instead, the work is just beginning. Now is the time to structure our days and nights to include time to be alone, time to listen to ourselves, and time to listen and talk with others.

We are now in the process of rebuilding ourselves into better people. We need to work on our outer appearances and our inner healthiness. Good nutrition, plenty of rest, a balance of exercise and play, meditation time, and a balance between work hours and home hours is needed for our best health. We can take the first healthy step toward building a better self.

Higher Power, help me look at my health. Can I identify areas that need improvement?

************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Seeing the beauty

We can see our Higher Power in so many beautiful things in this world: the reflection of light in the running brook; the spectrum of colors in the oil spot on the street; the stubbly grass peeking out of the snow like morning whiskers; hail popping like kernels of corn; the music of rain; the face of a child; the face of an elder.

Some of us see our Higher Power most clearly in the light of another’s eyes or in acts of unselfish kindness and know ourselves to be part of it. With clean, sober eyes we can see this beauty.

Can I see the beauty all around me?

Higher Power, help me see the beauty all around me today and to realize that I, too, am beautiful in your eyes.

Today I will look for the beauty in

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The day is a gift of the universe.

~ KATHLEEN CULVER ~

Newcomer

I don’t want to disappoint the people who count on me, but I’m afraid to promise that I’ll stick to this recovery stuff forever. I don’t know if I can do it. Frankly, I feel suffocated by the idea of never using anything ever again, of going to meetings for years—I can’t imagine spending my whole life in recovery.

Sponsor

The span of a whole life is impossible to imagine. We have no idea how long we’re going to live, what unforeseen things will take place in our lifetime, or even how a small choice we make today may in some way change the person we grow to be tomorrow. If I try to imagine doing anything “forever” or “for my whole life,” I’m overwhelmed. Fortunately, no one here is asking me to promise that. The program suggests only that we get through one day—today—without using an addictive substance. Yesterday is over. Tomorrow is not here yet. My whole life is now, and now is all that need concern me. Sometimes even a twenty-four-hour period feels overwhelming, so I break it down into hours and go through the day an hour at a time. Some days I’ve even had to think in terms of just one minute at a time. Using substances we’re addicted to comes naturally to us; a day in which we choose recovery instead is a highly successful day.

I let go of yesterday and tomorrow. I choose recovery for today.

************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

In Matthew’s account of the Sermon on the Mount he quotes Christ as saying “BE YE THEREFORE PERFECT, EVEN AS YOUR FATHER WHICH IS IN HEAVEN IS PERFECT.”

Our first reaction is that that is impossible. Christ either did not say this or else He did not mean it.

If He didn’t say it then the Bible is inaccurate. If He did and did not mean it, then Christ drops below Divine stature. No, He said and meant it. For man to aspire to less is a direct rejection of His order.

To cry that we are circumscribed by human limitations is to deny the God in us which makes all things possible.

We probably will never arrive at that state of perfection but we can, one day at a time, strive to attain that goal.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Suicide is such a long term decision, while living has so many more variables.

2) You are heading towards a slip when you remember the good times more than the bad.

3) Learn by others’ mistakes. You will never live long enough to make them all yourself.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

The Tollerance Prayer

Lord, give me tolerance toward those whose thoughts and ways, in the Program and life, conflict with mine. For though I would, I cannot always know what con-stitutes the Absolute Truth. The other person may be right, while I may be all wrong, yet unaware. 
Lord, make my motives right, for only this can ease my conscience when I sometimes err.
Lord, give me tolerance, for who am I to stand in judgment on another person’s mistakes? No one knows better than my inward self how many little blunders I have and can make.
Life is full of stones that somehow trip us, and meaning not, we stumble now and then.
Lord, give me tolerance, for only You are rightly fit to judge my fellow travelers.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD IS TRUTH

The second main aspect of God is Truth. God is not truthful but Truth itself, and wherever there is Truth, there is God. There are many things which are relatively true at certain times and places only: but God is absolute. Truth at all times and in all circumstances. As soon as we touch God, who is Absolute, relative things disappear.

To know the truth about any condition heals it. Jesus said, “And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free” (John 8:32).

You should realize God as Truth when you want information on any subject, or if you suspect that you have to deal with deceit. If you believe that someone is trying to deceive you, claim that divine Truth dwells in the person concerned, and is expressed through him. If you realize this clearly enough he will then speak the truth. When you have to transact any important business such as signing a lease or a contract, spend a few minutes realizing divine Truth and if there is any thing you should know, it will come out. Of course, people may not have any desire to deceive you and yet for some reason you may not be given the whole story. I know of several cases where serious misunderstandings were prevented because somebody realized God as Truth and so all the facts were brought out. I know also of cases where intentional dishonesty was frustrated in the same way.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Time to Be Free

Lovers make a fool of time.

~ Anonymous ~

When one of Albert Einstein’s students asked him to explain his abstruse theory of relativity in a way that anyone could understand, he answered, “A day spent with a beautiful woman seems like a moment; an hour at a job you hate feels like an eternity.” Einstein was teaching that our experience of time is determined by the consciousness we are in. Since time is an illusion invented by the human intellect, it is entirely pliable, expanding or contracting to reflect the thoughts we are holding at the time.

We always have enough time to do what needs to be done. Thoughts of “not enough time” are born of fear and a consciousness of lack. The ego fabricates the belief in lack of time as a sleight of hand to move us away from peace. If we make peace our first priority, all things that need to be taken care of in time will be handled.

We are always free in this moment. It is only when we haul the past or future into the now that we feel bound. Practice surfing on the energy of the now. If you become seduced by past or future thoughts, remind yourself that all is well right now. Handle whatever is before you, and leave the rest for another time or another way.

When we live in love, miracles happen that defy the laws of time. Ultimately, time becomes irrelevant, and, as Jesus stated, “The kingdom of heaven is at hand.” Prisoners are colloquially described as “doing time.” If you are a servant of time rather than letting time serve you, you are a prisoner. Break free of your watch, and bask in the glory of the present moment. Bring more activities that you love into your world, and you will be a millionaire of time.

Help me to move beyond time and celebrate the glory of the present moment.

I live in the timeless kingdom of love.

[bluidkiti]

January 14

Step by Step

“Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” – Step Two

Today, I tried it my way, and it didn’t work – frequently. But what “power” if not me? If I cannot believe in either a religious or secular “god,” can I believe that the greater power is as simple as my own self-awakening to the powerlessness that I have admitted in Step One? If I can, I must accept that the phrase “restore us to sanity” implies I am insane. Am I? If I define insanity as expecting or hoping for a better outcome of repeat behavior that has always led to the same outcome, then, yes, I am insane. Today, the power greater than myself can be as simple as my own awakening to my powerlessness, and I can hope that same power can pull me from the insanity of the myth of a better outcome of conduct that has always led to disastrous results. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SERVICE

Love is the forgetting of oneself in the service of another.

~ R Ainsley Barnwell ~

Any act of “carrying the message” can serve a useful purpose, whether or not we see the results. Our home group carries the message and observes the Fifth Tradition.

If we maintain an attitude of being of service with love, we can work wonders at any time and every moment of a day. Through our Twelve Step Program, we become aware that we have the opportunity of being an example of happy, joyous, and free living without the crutch of our addiction. This “face” we present can be a positive model for anyone who comes in contact with us.

If we confine our activities to only those persons who seek our help, we might miss the chance of influencing someone who isn’t the direct target of our “service of love.”

Today I will use the gifts my Higher Power and the Program have given me to be of service to others.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The best inheritance a parent can give his children is a few minutes of his time each day.

~ O. A. Battista ~

As fathers, we have a strong drive to provide for our loved ones. Many of us had fathers who were absent from our daily lives, often because they were working so much. Now, we also may find ourselves so dedicated to making a living and getting ahead that we don’t spend much time with our children and all those whom we love. We try to make up for it by giving generous gifts or providing them with many comforts that we didn’t have ourselves.

When we get so taken up with our work, we may justify it by saying we are doing it for our families. The truth is, nothing is as valuable as the time we spend together. Children are certainly richer and happier with the nurturing presence of their father than with extra material comforts. We always need to seek a balance. Doing well in our careers has its place, but it isn’t the most important thing in life.

I will keep my urge to provide for my loved ones in balance with simply spending time with them.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We are not unlike a particularly hardy crustacean. . . . With each passage from one stage of human growth to the next, we, too, must shed a protective structure.

~ Gail Sheehy ~

Our passage into a new stage of development was initiated by our desire to stop using chemicals. The values we lived by while using chemicals no longer fit us. We need to shed our old skin and grow a new one that reflects our current world- view.

We are now, and always will be, in the stage of becoming, of trying to fulfill our changing dreams and aspirations. What we can accomplish at one stage of life is different from what we can handle at another. And yet an overall design is being shaped by all our endeavors. The more willing we are to shed yet another skin, the more centered, stable, and spirit-filled we’ll become.

Do my actions fit my values? As I outgrow my values, I will release them. I will relish my growth today and celebrate my new skin.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am grateful for my abstinence

It’s scary to remember what life was like when I was still using. Only now can I see how much I was acting out, how out of control I was, and how afraid I was of facing my problems.

Once I got clean and sober, I could hold my head up again. I knew better where I was at and my psychiatrist could diagnose the somewhat hidden problem in my life—emotional illness. And because I was abstinent, I had more strength to face this new challenge in what has become my dual recovery.

I will write out two ways abstinence has helped me in recovering from my emotional or psychiatric illness.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and adventure to discover our own special light.

~ Mary Dunbar ~

All of us are gifted. Every person has a gift that can bring great joy and light to those who encounter it. Our task is to stand in the sun and create a climate that will develop and nurture our gift.

Sometimes we are afraid to let ourselves believe we have anything special to offer or contribute to the world. We think of ourselves as plain and untalented, with no gifts or special potential. But if we believe we are limited, we act in a limited way. We take few risks and follow few paths that might develop our special talents and gifts.

In recovery we are learning to love ourselves and trust ourselves in a whole new way. Now anything is possible. To fully believe in our talents, we need only step from the darkness into the sun. We will take this first step, trust enough, and start believing that, yes, we do have special gifts.

Today let me he aware of my deep and unfilled desires, dreams, and wishes, which is the first step on the way to accepting my gifts.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I think we fall in love with people who have something to teach us. And sometimes that is a hard lesson and sometimes it’s a safe and loving lesson.

~ Mary Bradish ~

Love can make you feel strong and sure, confident in the knowledge that someone has “got your back.” Other times it can make you feel weak and vulnerable, particularly when you need to give openly and honestly. Unhealthy relationships involve disharmony, mistrust, and a lack of understanding and support. Partners in a healthy relationship understand and support each other’s needs and seek harmony in their shared companionship.

Love, like life, has its ups and downs. Things get out of balance, causing anxiety or indecision. Ask yourself, “What do I need to learn from what I’m feeling right now?” You may discover you are not the cause of the upset or your feelings are not based on your current relationship, but on the threads of past relationships that unraveled.

Even though love’s emotional expression can change from time to time, the existence of love will not. Love is a constant, no matter what form it takes in your life.

Today I will understand and accept the form love takes not only during the easy times, but also when times are hard. I will seek out serenity and be open to whatever lessons I am being taught.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

The doors we open and dose each day decide the lives we live.

~ Flora Whittemore ~

We often hear the phrase, “When one door shuts, another opens.” It means everything has a beginning and an end. When our travels on one path are completed, another path lies ahead.

It’s not easy to feel a door close. Relationships, friendships, careers, and lives end. Although we may not understand why a door closes, it’s important to remember our Higher Power has everything to do with it. By the same token, we may not understand why certain doors open, revealing opportunities we may have longed for. Again, our Higher Power feels we are ready to pursue that new experience.

The doors that opened and closed today helped prepare us for our experiences tonight. The doors that opened and closed tonight will help us grow toward tomorrow. We are not mice in a maze, randomly pursuing paths for a reward of cheese. We are children of our Higher Power, guided towards our chosen goal through the many doors we open and close along the way.

Have I learned there is a reason for everything in my life? Can I trust that my path has been prepared for me by my Higher Power?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being true

We believe we can become beautiful people, free of addiction. With belief in a Power greater than ourselves, our Twelve Step program, and the fellowship, we don’t have to stay where we were. Our purpose in life is to stay sober and clean.

Our Higher Power knows our true purpose in life and will help us. Our Higher Power knows what we are capable of becoming, although others may misjudge us.

Am I staying true to my purpose?

I pray that I may see the good within me and remain true to my purpose.

I will honor my true purpose today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The truth can he spoken only by someone who already lives inside it.

~ LUDWIG WITTGENSTEIN ~

Newcomer

Some of the expressions people use to talk about recovery sound sickeningly sweet to me. On my first day, someone

I’d never seen before said to me, “Welcome to our fellowship.” It makes my skin crawl when they say that kind of thing. And all those slogans! They make me wonder if people in recovery can think for themselves.

Sponsor

I can identify with you. In early recovery, I felt uncomfortable when people reached out to me. I had been impatient and cynical for a long time; I was suspicious of positive statements and looked down on people who made them. My habit of finding fault came in handy when somebody challenged my old ways of thinking. It was easier to criticize others than to look at myself.

It’s funny: when I was active in my addiction, I rarely complained of how tedious and repetitive my life had become. I had surrounded myself with people who enabled my addiction. I must have sounded like a broken record as I justified my addiction in spite of the consequences. Today, my focus is no longer on likes and dislikes. Instead of dismissing people without really looking or listening, I can go deeper and see what’s true for me in whatever they are saying.

In recovery, free of the need to make snap judgments, we can begin to listen in a new way.

Today, I listen without judging. I cultivate respect and tenderness for others and for myself.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Within our ranks we have many faiths and creeds. All of us seek and find our Power greater than ourselves in our own way and give Him a personality according to our own understanding. Yet withal, we abide in peaceful toleration and respect the faiths that we each have found.

Even those of us who are still groping in uncertainty and doubt are gradually acquiring faith. Tennyson once said, “There is more faith in honest doubt, believe me, than in half the Creeds.”

Here we don’t care WHAT you believe, we only ask that you believe. Have some anchor, so that when the waves of alcoholic thinking start again to roll, you will be moored to something substantial enough to enable you to ride out the storm.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Turn it over; don’t overturn it.

2) If you want to feel better, clean house. If you want to get better, find God.

3) FEAR: Frantic Efforts to Appear Recovered

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

A Beginner’s Prayer

Lord, I want to love You, yet I am not sure.
I want to trust You, yet I am afraid of being taken in.
I know I need You, but I am ashamed of the need.
I want to pray, but I am afraid of being a hypocrite.
I need my independence, yet I fear to be alone.
I want to belong, yet I must be myself.
Take me, Lord, yet leave me alone.
Lord, I believe; help me with my unbelief.
O Lord, if You are there, You do understand, don’t You?
Give me what I need, but leave me free to choose.
Help me work it out my own way, but don’t let me go.
Let me understand myself, but don’t let me despair.
Come unto me, O Lord, I want You there.
Lighten my darkness, but don’t dazzle me.
Help me to see what I need to do, and give me strength to do it.
O Lord, I believe; help me with my unbelief.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD is LOVE

The third main aspect of God is Love. God is not loving but Love itself, and it would probably be true to say that of all of the seven main aspects, this is the most important one for us to practice. There is no condition that enough Love will not heal. The Bible deals with the nature of God, and as the Scripture develops, the idea of God becomes clearer until toward the end it says,

….God is Love: and he that dwelleth in Love dwelleth in God, and God in him (I John 4:16).

By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another (John 13:35).

Where there is fear there cannot be love. The best way to rid yourself of fear is to realize divine Love. If you love God more than you love your microbe, your sickness, your grievance, your lack, or your fear, you will be healed. We have all heard many stories of exceptional people who were able to go among wild beasts in the jungle without being hurt, and there are many other histories on record of people who passed through extraordinary dangers of other kinds quite unscathed. To realize God as Love is the remedy for fear.

Divine Love never fails, but the important thing to realize is that divine Love must be in your own heart and cannot operate from outside, so to speak. When your prayers are not answered it must be because you have not fulfilled the conditions of the law times in a hundred, it is because you are lacking in a sense of love for all. Practice love every day and watch your thought, and watch your tongue, and watch your deed, that nothing contrary to love finds expression there.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Forge a New Destiny

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt ~

A t a restaurant, I noticed a couple enjoying what looked like some very tasty garlic toast. When I asked the waitress for an order of the same, she answered, “I’m sorry, sir, the garlic toast comes only with the dinner.”

“Would it be possible to order some as a side order?” I persisted.

She looked puzzled. “I don’t know if that’s ever been done, sir.”

“Then perhaps this is our opportunity to change history and create a new destiny,” I suggested. She smiled, went into the kitchen, and soon re–turned with a dish of piping hot garlic toast—an historic day for the Grosvenor restaurant!

We can transform our lives by changing the way we think about possibilities. We are prone to picture our future as an extension of our past. But we have no guarantee at all that our future will be anything like our past. The nature of a consciousness shift is the release of an old belief sys–tem, replacing it with a new and grander one. Just when you think you know it all, life comes along and says, “Here, let me show you a bigger universe!” Thank God we do not know it all; if we did, we would be in big trouble, for most of what we know has made us small. Be grateful that the universe is willing to take away your impotence and replace it with magnitude.

Lead me to a destiny that outshines my history. I am willing to release my expectations based on the past, and know a better future.

I open my mind to the new and the better. I live in a universe far grander than I can imagine.

[bluidkiti]

January 15

Step by Step

“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” – Step Three

Today, for the alcoholic stumbling out of the fog of an extended drunk, there could be a problem with the use of the word “God” with a capital “G” and the reference to Him with a capital “H.” “God” and “Him” smack of religious connotations, a potential turnoff to the person new to the Program. But recovery is a spiritual, not religious process, and the God referenced here could be the “power” evoked in Step Two – and that power stronger than ourselves could be something as simple as our awakening to the reality that we could not sober up on our own. But Step Three requires another action – surrendering to something unseen but which, by sheer faith, is stronger than us. Step Three leads us to the admission that we are powerless over what we cannot control and have come to believe in a power greater than ourselves – and then entrusting ourselves to the care of that stronger power. Today, my decision is to turn my will and my life over to that force that I trust – on sheer faith – will handle me better than I ever could. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ANGER

I was angry with my foe. I told it not. My wrath did grow.

~ William Blake ~

Anger is a common defect in our attitudes and personalities. Like all other character defects, anger grows more harmful the longer it is contained within ourselves. Unless we expose it freely for others to see, it can consume all our good intentions. We must “get the monkey off our backs before it reaches for our throats.”

How can we possibly make peace and form worthwhile relationships unless we bring anger into the open by working Steps 4, 5, 6, and 7? Letting go of hidden anger and returning to a stable state of mind is the first step in finding a comfortable peace with life.

We find that “letting it all out” through the Steps is the way to become free and happy. We continue to take daily personal assessments of our spiritual growth by monitoring our anger.

When I become angry, I’ll count to ten and deal with my anger in an appropriate way.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.

~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. ~

Hope and freedom and the right to dignity as a man are very personal things for every one of us in recovery. Regardless of our race or creed or ethnic origin, we are alike in that we are walking this healing path out of subjugation to addiction and codependency. Today is the birthday of a heroic man, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., who dedicated his life not to his own self-interest, but to peace and the right of all people to be free. He spoke to all people who have struggled under a yoke of pain and trouble.

We must accept disappointments along our path. They are inevitable. We strive hard to achieve a goal and it may slip from our fingers. We fall in love and lose the one we love. In the midst of disappointment we may doubt whether we can handle it. But life goes on. We take our setbacks and ask, what do I need to learn from this? We don’t lose sight of our long-term objective to become the best kind of man we can be and to live in line with our spiritual principles. That is the path to our personal freedom and dignity.

Today I am grateful that those who have gone before us have shown us the path.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Blaming someone or something else doesn’t help me to grow as an individual.

~ Chris DeMetsenaere ~

It is not unusual to meet women in recovery who have survived harrowing childhoods or brutal marriages. Many of us have lived troubled lives and felt powerless to change the circumstances. If we continue to focus on those times, however, we will grow far less than we deserve.

What has happened has happened. We can’t redo the past. Hanging on to it in order to blame other people for our failures and shortcomings builds a barrier to growth. With our minds on the past, we are not actively and consciously involved in the present, and this moment is all we have.

It’s understandable that we want to blame others for our circumstances. Although we know that taking full responsibility for our lives is a sign of spiritual and emotional maturity, many of us still fear others’ expectations. Being fully responsible, we will quit blaming others and make the amends we need to make. We will learn to pause before acting or responding to others.

I will feel empowered today if I accept responsibility for my every thought and act.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I don’t have to blame myself

I know myself enough to know that when I make a mistake, even a small one, I can be hard on myself. With a dual disorder, I am more apt to make mistakes and so am more vulnerable than ever. All too often I feel shameful, guilty, defective. I get scared at how much I dislike myself at times.

Fortunately my therapist has helped me deal with these strong feelings. I am learning that (a) I am not to blame for my dual illnesses; they are caused by imbalances in brain chemistry and perhaps by some early nurturing problems—neither of which I’m responsible for. (b) I am responsible for my recovery, (c) Making mistakes is not a bad thing. Mistakes are one of my many teachers, (d) The more I accept this, the easier it is for me to accept my situation and take my struggle in stride.

I will look at a recent mistake to see what I can learn from it.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

A faithful friend is the medicine of life.

~ The Apocrypha ~

When a friend loses a job or a loved one, we hurt, too. We wish there was something we could do, really do to help, something that would ease the pain. It hurts us to see our friends upset and frightened. But our head tells us there’s really nothing we can do except stand by and offer support.

One thing we can do is simply be there when they need to talk and listen when silence is best. We can let them know that our relationship is the same, that we don’t feel any differently. We can offer our time, when needed. And we can let them grieve and be angry without criticizing them.

We need to remember that the important thing is our friend’s pain, not our own. Sometimes we hurt so badly for others that they end up feeling they must help us. In our hurry to stop the pain we often try to over-control the situation and demand that a friend race through the process of grief. We might try to push him or her into action that isn’t right. Now that we can see this pattern, we try to avoid it. And we can remember that a friend needs respect, not interference. A friend needs love, not pampering or care- taking. A friend needs support, not babying. Sometimes all a friend needs is someone to listen.

Today help me put aside my tendency to “fix” things, and simply be there to listen.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The Horse and the Mule

Traveling together, a horse sported a fine coat and a magnificent saddle with ornate decorations, while a mule was burdened with a heavy load. Its coat was matted and filled with burrs.

“Oh how I wish I could be as beautiful and graceful as you are ” the mule told the horse. “I wish, too, that I was as unburdened and carefree.”

A few days later, a great war broke out and the horse went into battle, while the mule carried supplies. During a skirmish, the horse was gravely wounded and lay dying upon the ground when the mule came upon him. It was then that the mule realized, that in being himself, he had fulfilled his purpose and been kept safe.

The moral of the story: Be secure in who you are.

You may look at others and what they have, and wish you had the same characteristics or were in the same place as they. Ultimately, how you feel about who you are deter-mines your level of self-esteem. Even though there are things you want to change about yourself, these things make up who you are today. No matter what your defects or imperfections, accept who you are in the present moment.

Today I will appreciate who I am and what I have.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

What was completely forbidden for me to do would be to kill myself. . . . If I were to commit suicide, I would be throwing God’s gift back in his face.

~ Dr. Raymond A. Moody ~

Many of us have had suicidal thoughts at one time or another. We hear at meetings how others have tried suicide in the past. We may have tried it ourselves or our lives may have been touched by the suicide of someone we knew. We may now find that living a clean, sober, spiritual life is overwhelming. Sometimes we may feel like giving up.

That’s when we need to call someone. Talk it out. Or get to a meeting and be honest with the group about our feelings. There are people who care. Our friends and our peers are God’s human messengers, ready to give understanding to those in need.

If a friend of ours felt down on life, wouldn’t we want to help? Now is the time to open ourselves up to caring and love from another human being.

Do I think about giving up? Who can I open up to for caring and love?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Sharing feelings

Many of us just did what other people did: We took drugs. But we felt so different from “normal” people. Why? Because of the way we did drugs and because drugs were so unfulfilling for us. It’s a joke among us recovering addicts that we tried so hard to look normal.

Non-addicts didn’t know our torment, didn’t know that we lived in another world. While high, we felt moments of euphoria and false well-being. When the drugs wore off, we suffered centuries of misery. Both are feelings that “normal” people did not experience.

In the fellowship, however, we share all our feelings because we know that we are among friends, we know that we are finally home.

Do I share my true feelings with others?

Higher Power, I pray for the willingness to see my true feelings more clearly and to share myself with my fellow addicts.

The feelings I will share today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Very little is needed to make a happy life.

~ MARCUS AURELIUS ANTONINUS ~

Newcomer

I’m having a horrible day. I have way too much to do. This morning I felt overwhelmed, but I went to a meeting as you told me to. Instead of making me feel better, the meeting made me feel worse: I got upset at what someone shared and started to cry. Now I have a headache and I can’t concentrate on what I was supposed to do. How will I ever get this stuff done?

Sponsor

What you experienced at the meeting was not to blame for your sadness. More likely, whatever triggered your tears was already inside you, waiting for something to release it. Most of us who are in recovery have a lot of stored-up grief. Tears are beneficial and cleansing.

There are days like this, when we feel sad, distracted, overwhelmed. Some days—especially in early recovery- are unexpectedly emotional. On such days, we may have to accept that it’s enough simply to breathe, eat three meals, drink water, and abstain from using our drug of choice. And, yes, to go to a meeting. Meetings remind us that when an alcoholic stays sober, an overeater eats moderately, or a perfectionist knows that he or she has done enough, a significant victory has been achieved. For those of us living with addiction, one day without addictive behavior is a precious step forward on our journey.

I am willing to revise my goals for this day. I give myself the gift of keeping it simple for one day of recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Looking back at our ambitions and aspirations we can recall many things we wanted and which we thought would make our lives complete. Some of them were impossible; they were the offspring of childish dreams, and later on, alcoholic wishing. Some of those things were possible for others but unattainable for us with our limited abilities.

We can now accept the fact that those things were not for us and wouldn’t have been good for us if we had had them. Some of them we obtained and wished we hadn’t. Their realizations were nothing compared to our expectations and the more we got the more we wanted. Ambitions were never realized because the more we advanced the more the horizons receded.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Accidents aren’t planned—slips are.

2) There are no fatal decisions, as long as you don’t pick up that first fix, pill, or drink.

3) You used to be good at being bad. Now you’re going to get good a being good.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

God, Help Me Live Today

God, more than anything else in this world, I just don’t want to be sick any more.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (people, places, and things),
The courage to change the things I can (my attitudes),
And the common sense to know the difference.
God, help me please to stay clean and sober this day, even if it’s in spite of myself. Help me, Lord, to stay sensitive to my own needs and the things that are good for me, and to stay sensitive to the needs of others and the things that are good for them.
And if You please, Lord, free me enough of the bondage of self that I may be of some useful value as a human being, whether I understand or not,
That I may carry my own keys, maintain my own integrity, and live this day at peace with You, at peace with myself, and at peace with the world I live in, just for today.
God help me during this day to demonstrate that:
It is good for me to love and to be loved.
It is good for me to understand and to be understood.
It is good for me to give and to receive.
It is good for me to comfort and to allow myself to be comforted.
And it is obviously far better for me to be useful as a human being, than it is to be selfish.
God, help me please to put one foot in front of the other, to keep moving forward, and to do the best I can with what I have to work with today,
Accepting the results of whatever that may or may not be.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD IS INTELLIGENCE

The fourth main aspect of God is Intelligence. When you clearly realize that this is an intelligent universe it will make a major difference in your life. In an intelligent universe there cannot be disharmony because all ideas must work together for the common good. Neither can there be any lack. An engine which has been intelligently designed does not have any unnecessary parts and neither are any essential parts lacking.

It is especially important to realize that God is Intelligence because it sometimes happens that when people outgrow the childish idea that God is just a magnified man, they go to the opposite extreme and think of God as a blind force, like gravity or electricity. This means that they have lost all sense of the Love and Fatherhood of God, and such an idea is very little better than a subtle form of atheism.

God is not a person in the usual sense of the word, but God has every quality of personality except its limitation. The Human mind cannot imagine personality which is not limited, but this difficulty arises from the limitations of the human mind itself, and, of course, this does not affect the nature of God. The Bible says, in effect, whatever you think I am, that I will be to you: and this means that if we attribute to God every quality of an infinite, intelligent, loving personality, God will be just that to us. So we may say that we believe in a personal God.

Children and young people respond very readily indeed to a prayer for expression of Intelligence through them. If you are interested in a young person at college, pray several times a week that Intelligence will manifest through him and you will be surprised to find how his progress in his studies will increase. Remember also the wonderful fact that when you work for a person the result will be with him for the rest of this life.

O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and the knowledge of God! . . . (Romans 11:33).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Great Spirits

Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.

~ Albert Einstein ~

I saw a film of a meeting held by civil rights workers who were planning to go into the South in the early 1960s. A leader informed the group that three of their colleagues had just been killed by racists. He warned them that their lives would be in danger should they choose to continue their mission. “If any of you wish to change your mind, I will understand,” he calmly informed them. After a long moment, one woman in the back of the room stood and began to sing a Negro spiritual. Soon everyone in the room rose and sang with her. All of the workers went to the South.

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., is one of my heroes. I respect him because he relied on the power of God, truth, and love rather than falling back on base instincts. Even more important, he walked his talk. Rather than sending other men off to war, he marched in front of his troops. Rather than making a particular person or group the enemy, he singled out fear and prejudice as the enemies to be overcome. He went to jail rather than compromise his integrity. He lived his vision and died with great courage. He didn’t just talk about world transformation. He lived it.

Although you and I may not take upon ourselves the breadth of his mission, the same challenge calls to us. We must live what we believe and not give in to fear. We must act on our principles rather than simply talk about them. And we must find ways to join, not separate from, our brothers and sisters.

It is fitting that our country honors a man such as Dr. King. As we live our own ideals, we honor the cause for which he lived and died.

Give me the strength to walk with integrity; help me to live what I believe.

I am here for a mighty purpose. I change the world by following my truth.